April 2014 thread! - still continually supporting one another!

[Cupcake92]

New thread :)
I want to see lots of our old faces back!!
Come on girls!

Ducky it's ur stbxh loss if he doesn't ask to see the kids or want to spend time with them. And ur a great mom from what I've heard u say and u can give them an amazing life on ur own :) for me there's a rare moment I just love, it's when me and the kids have a lazy day and I've brought the quilt downstairs on the sofa and a films on and both dc's fall asleep on me and it's just peaceful and to look at them think I've brought them up and it's me turning them into these lovely little men :)
Cuz let's face it... exH hasn't rele done much... 2 days a week he has them but never takes them out and has not once put them to bed ever as he won't have them stay over...
I'm gonna take full credit of my boys growing into lovely kind men!

also with ur ds not eating, mine go through this stage often. Can last weeks where they won't eat hardly anything, maybe pack of crisps and chips then suddenly he's asking for bananas, ham and will eat a whole roast dinner! Same with ds2!

Lulu, that film sounds gruesome!!
And ur poor SIL :( sickness is awful and sometimes worse when u aren't being sick as the feeling is constantly there. I felt ridiculously sick this pregnancy. I'm glad it went not long after I turned 12 weeks.

I had no energy yesterday at all. My body was exhausted! No idea why as I didn't do much think xmas and new year had caught up with me.
Ds1 has his pre school jabs on Friday! not looking forward to that!!

Jesus I spoke to Dr Ranj this morning haha
And Phill and davina

Who are they Cupcake? Why did you speak to them?

The TV programme 'This Morning' on itv. I was on a phone in to ask one of the doctors about antidepressants in pregnancy and what I can do.
Dr Ranj is a famous doctor lol!
And Philli scoffield and Davina McCall! :)

Omg cupcake! That was on in the background and I heard someone talking about anti depressants in pregnancy! I didn't hear it all just remember glancing across at if! I was playing with ds.

H finally text me. I met him at the pub half way between our houses. He was already there when I got there, he had hit himself a drink, nothing for ds. I had to get ds a drink. There was a £1 toy machine and ds was standing by it saying 'please daddy! Please daddy! Please daddy!' Stbxh told him he didn't have any money to get him one.... then walked off to get himself a drink, he paid in cash.

I think stbxh has moved his new gf into our house they have been posting pictures. She's sat in my house, drinking out my favourite wine glass (I had a special glass I used to drink out of ) while stbxh cooks for her. He never did that for me. No doubt she has gone through all my stuff and took what she wants.

Ducky it's so surreal I also had a conversation off air with Dr Ranj n he's told me to push my midwife to refer me to a psychotherapist nurse who deal with pregnant women. N he said he's surprised my midwife hasn't suggested it !

ur stbxh is so frustrating !!! Ducky please text him and say u will be popping over at such and such Day and time (with someone with you) and tell him ull be getting the rest of ur stuff.
I'd be absolutely fuming if some women was in my house!! She's disrespectful! So is ur stbxh! I feel so angry for u!!!

Ds likes that kids programme he's on with the puppet things

How was ds injections?

Dd was not happy at all! Stbxh didn't bother asking how she was. I'm feeling a bit down about it at the moment, how can he care so little. We were together 10 years but it's like he has no concern in the slightest for me or the kids. I think our whole relationship was a lie and I wasted 10 years on him, loosing every single friend I had along the way.

But on a positive note, my solicitor got my marriage certificate today so the divorce can move on so excited to get the final thing to confirm the divorce. I'm going to frame it!

My ds likes that oo ducky be happy be healthy and get well soon

Ds didn't cry at all for his injections!! He was so so brave :) very proud of him!!

Ur so much better off without him: and don't feel uve wasted 10 years just now uve got 10 years experience of what guys not to go for lol!

I've been exhausted the past few days. I'm fed up now and want this pregnancy to be over :( my midwife has basically now forced me into a csection and scared me off a vbac saying I could die. Afraid I'm not gonna bond well with this baby :( n it's my last ever baby.
Just feel rather down about everything right now.

Well Ds has just gone to sleep! He has been running round until half 9 then snuggled in watching TV with DH until about 10 minutes ago. DH has been at a parents' evening and came in about half 8, had his meal and looks knackered. Just wait until we have two of them!

Ur ds fancied a late night then lulu
Is DH getting on well with the new term? How long will he get off when the baby arrives?

I've been lucky tonight! Both dc's have been exhausted! Had a bath at 6:45pm then were both out for the count by 7:30pm! Tho, ds2 I noticed had a few red spots on his shoulder and back of his kneck. He was itching them. They don't look like chicken pox tho. Will have to see how they are in the morning!

Cupcake why have they said that? Can you ask for a second opinion? I've seen so many threads on here about people going for vbacs. Your midwife doesn't sound too supportive! How has stbxh been with you recently?

Lulu your ds is pulling a late one! Have you decided who will be having ds when you go into labour?

Well I think I have given up on ever getting the ds Christmas money of stbxh. The draft divorce petition has been signed and returned to the solicitor. He won't like it as it mentions the history of domestic violence and him cheating on me and not doing anything round the house and how he reacted last time we split. He's going to be fuming knowing that I have told anyone about all of that. I had to go collect some stuff from the house while he was at work, I think he's moved his girlfriend in so i didn't want her using/taking my stuff. I found his large stash of condoms.... I hid them because I was feeling petty

I know I have asked before, but, were both of you on cerezette? I got my pills the other day. They said there's a manufacturing problem with cerezette so it's a different pill but the same kind. Did it stop your periods?

I was on cerazette- didn't stop my bleeding but it was lighter.

DS was awake at half 7 this morning and asleep by 8 tonight so getting back to normalish. He has been full of energy today. He pats my bump now and says 'baby' but it is just copying what DH shows him to do. His room has been decorated and his furniture has arrived so tomorrow night is the big changeover to a bed. Hoping it goes smoothly. It is right next to his room now and has view of the park so he can still see the ducks. He and I are arranging his toys in there tomorrow.

Cupcake , DH is fine with work. Has really adjusted now to the job.

Ducky, it will be SIL and BIL who have DS when I go to the hospital. If it is through the night we will just ring and they will come here and stay here. It is only 2 minutes drive. If it is through the day they will just pick him up from nursery. We are hoping it will be during the Easter holidays and DH will be off. Then he can keep the paternity leave until later in the summer term.

I would just let STBXH get on with his grumping Ducky. You are well rid. Who cares what he thinks?

Hope DS2 is ok Cupcake- could it be a heat rash?

Ducky I have s consultant apt on 31st so going to ask then about it as last time they said I could try vbac. Also I've got a page of research that suggests vbac is best for me
TBH ducky, I think ur stbxh needs all that written down so he can read it and realise what a complete ass he has been to u! Hope he reads and feels guilty!
u hiding the condoms is hilarious!! good move!

Aww lulu, hope ur ds has a lovely first night in his new room tomorrow! :) I bet it looks lovely! And him patting ur belly is cute!
Ds2 doesn't understand about the baby in my belly. Ds1 tells me there's a baby in his belly he also tells other people that I have a baby girl in my belly! And when I correct him and say, 'no it's a baby boy! Another brother remember?'
He tells them he doesn't want a brother
Ds1 also listens to my belly it's very strange! Puts his ear to it. He said to baby the other day 'can u come out now baby?'

I've not got long to go tho!
Hope I go into labour tho and hope it's early! I'm almost 32 weeks now.

Oh and ducky, stbxh has been okay recently with me. Think we've learnt just to get on. I only really talk to him when I take and pick up the dc's. Always suggests names for the baby n I don't like any so he moans about it and says he will be nameless lol! Tho he's told me he's getting 3 weeks off for paternity leave. I asked if I've had a section he may need to have the ds1 and 2 over night for the week as I will struggle. His response was 'well they sleep at night so surely they can stay with u' dunno why he's so against having them over night?

And yes I was on cerezzette. I conceived ds1 on cerezette

How was ds in his new room lulu?

Not too long cupcake! Is the consultant appointment specifically to discuss a vbac? I found then midwifes and consultants always say completely different things:

How strange that stbxh will have the kids but never over night! I don't understand men!

And I don't think there's any risk of me getting pregnant!

Nope not long ducky but I'm ready for it to be over with now!
And yep! Got a growth scan before my appointment to check his weight too. But it's to discuss a vbac. I'm hoping they will ignore my midwife and still let me have one.

I don't understand men either! I don't get why having his children overnight is so difficult!
Some men get it so easy after having kids. As if nothing's changed In their life.

Got pressure down below today!
Hope it's him getting further down !

I wanted a waterbirth with dd, my midwife said it would be fine, another said no way, then my lead consultant said it would be fine and I saw a different one when she was off who said no chance, so I think it just depends on who you see!

Hope they sort it for you! Is he big on his growth chart?

DS loves his room. He wants us to go away and leave him alone in it. 'My big boy bed'.

Today he spoke to MIL on the phone and she asked him what he had done today and he said 'a big poo'. That is DH's fault.

'Poo' is one of DS's favourite words at the moment, that and 'Oh poop'. DH h started to say 'Oh poop' instead of 'Oh shit' if DS is there and something goes wrong and DS is copying him.

I am 26 weeks and 2 days- only 13 and a bit weeks left.

Names at the moment on DH's list are:
Evangeline 'Evie'
Isobel
Elinor
Clementine 'Clemmie'
Mia

I lke 'Evie' and Isobel and Clemmie.

And have had terrible wind today and yesterday - lots of it . Another of the less dignifying aspects of pregnancy.

Oh lulu I had the wind issue too!! Very glamorous!!

My ds is currently saying dude after everything haha

Stbxh has until Friday to challenge the divorce petition thing. If there's no contact from him by Friday the solicitor is sending it to the courts to wait to go before a judge to finalise the divorce fingers crossed!

Ducky he's only measuring a week ahead :)
Fx for ur divorce being finalised!!!

Lulu pregnancy wind i just burp all the time and it gives me heartburn

I'm exhausted. Like seriously exhausted these past 2 days.
I'm aching so much, my stomachs so heavy, my Braxton hicks hurt. I'm just so fed up now I want this baby out!!! :( :(

Fx he does not reply Ducky and it just goes through. Then you will be rid of him. Has he even got himself a solicitor?

DS came to see midwife with me today. She asked him was he looking forward to having a baby sister and he said 'No'. She asked him if he is a good boy and he said 'No' . She asked him what he had for lunch and he said 'Poo'. All the while he was smiling. Then he ran round the room with a car in his hand makng car noises.

Cupcake, I am feeling very lively and full of energy for some reason. I pushed DH for 4 miles today along the seafront and we had an hour in the park playing. Don't know why I am so energetic and not tired. I was up at 5.30am because I was wide awake.

Cupcake I do not miss the Brixton hicks! So exhausting! Do you have any more scans now? Who will be with you for the birth?

Lulu, he hasn't got himself a solicitor, he's far far too tight for that. He just wants as much money as he can get his hands on. That's all he's bothered about. He'll probably blow the lot on himself and his girlfriend! Poo for lunch!? how long will dh be having off when the baby is born?

Whenever I have been to the house stbxh post is usually unopened on the side, so I have no idea if he has actually read the petition. I would be interested to know if he did or not, as it would put me at ease knowing he did, as in my mind that would be him accepting what he has done to me. It had about dv in there and his affairs. He's not mentioned anything to me, I didn't know he had it yet until I spoke to my solicitor today.

Can I ask some advice. I have probably mentioned before, but stbxh doesn't drive. He's sat in our house, not cleaning it and refusing to move things (on the advice of the estate agent to get asking price), was happy to see ds and I homeless, any time he has asked I have got dc ready, in the car and down to see him using my petrol, all he had provided for them is about 2/3 max tubs of formula and a couple of packs of nappies. He has his girlfriend there and is always out partying every week without fail aswell as taking his girlfriend regularly out to meals etc, yet when I have asked for maintenance he has said no. Am I unreasonable for ignoring his text tonight demanding to see them Friday? I can't stand him but feel like such a bitch. And when he's with ds it feels so forced with him, he pays practically 0 attention to dd, she doesn't have a clue who he is.

Lulu children are so funny and cheeky sometimes aren't they
I was full of energy like u! But it's the last couple of days it's been drained from me and I'm just exhausted!

Braxton hicks are annoying ducky I've got a scan on the 31st to check his weight lol hoping he's not too big!
As for the birth I've not really spoken about it to stbxh I don't really like talking about it to him as he's adamant I go for a csection. Gets annoyed and says I'll be putting the baby at risk if I don't have one. My mom is having the dc's tho :) she's already informed work so she can call up and say I've gone in and have time off asap. Which is good.
Ducky I would literally just send him one text back saying, 'no you can't see them Friday as I don't have enough money for the petrol as you don't give me maintenance, so all my money has been spent taking care of the children'

I finally completed my hospital bag yesterday. Thank god!

Oooh is doing your hospital bag still exciting? I found with ds, I packed it and re packed it hundreds of times making loads of check lists and stuff but with dd it was just lobbed in and I took the bare minimum

I have just ignored his text. I shall be seeing him later at mediation. I'm nervous. My dm is having the dc. Hope she gets on ok, ds is very much a nannys boy and as soon as he sees her holding dd he demands she gives her to me and picks him up!