TTC after miscarriage - new thread

[InsufficientlyCaffeinated]

I just spotted that the old thread was now closed to new messages so thought I'd start another. The old thread for reference: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2457787-TTC-1-after-miscarriage-looking-for-some-buddies

How are you doing today Snowberry? Hopefully you will get some good news next week.

Snowberry sorry you're having to go through this uncertainty, I've had this too. The lovely ladies on the pg after mc thread had some positive stories of beans being a bit slow but catching up, fx that'll be you too.

It's my first week back at work, and its going much better than the previous times. I asked my manager to tell my colleagues before I came back and to ask them not to offer me sympathy as I can't really cope with ppl being nice to me, it's too much of a reminder IFYSWIM. But had a wobble yesterday when I was told my colleague had just had her baby. I'm very happy for her but I had to go cry in my car over my 3 losses before I could drive home.

for Snowberry and Mimi

Hope you get more of a solid answer and that it's good news next week Snowberry.

Obviously I cracked despite my previous stated intention to wait until AF was due to POAS and obviously it was BFN. Silly me. Not so good at being calm and relaxed about this, or anything. Knew I shouldn't have ordered the internet cheapies. When I have to go to Superdrug to buy a full-priced test I at least wait until until I'm more sure so I don't spend all my money POAS or get a reputation for obsessive pee stick buying in Superdrug. I'd distribute it out but I hate Boots and don't like buying them in supermarkets because they're in those plastic cases so it draws attention to what you're buying. Anyway, I digress! Had more spotting yesterday and today but still no AF, due between tomorrow and Sunday. DEFINITELY going to hold out until Saturday now...

Good luck ic! My second af is much more normal than my first. Except for it being late. Hoping that it ends on time and then I can feel better.

Thinking of you for next week snowy.

mimi well done on going back to work its a big step. (Not managed it yet). I hope your feeling better.

IC I am not buying the Internet cheapies as I will develop an obsession for peeing on sticks!

Glad second one is back to normal loki. Hopefully won't go on to long!

I'm in a bit of a dilemma. I got my ovulation sticks off the Internet and of course had to pee on one. Anyway it looks like I'm about to ovulate. Now I've not had my first af yet. Do I wait or give it a go?!!!

DO IT!!!!!

Your body will only get pregnant when it is ready. Just be sure that it isn't left over pregnancy hormone - if you are getting negative hpts it will be fine. Just go with how you feel! Good luck x

If you feel physically and mentally ready go for it

I did a test last week and got a negative, guess that means I can give it a shot!

Go for it Paco and don't worry about cracking under the pressure IC we all do it! Fingers crossed this is your month!

Hi all, hope you're all ok.

Paco if you feel you're ready I'd go for it!

Feeling really down in the dumps today. Completely fed up, really emotional too like I'm going to burst into tears any minute. Don't know why maybe it's af making me feel like this. It's nearly over now I think. It's turned brown now, glad it was short lived but I've never had a period that's only lasted 4 days.
I've also been invited to a close friends wedding reception which had made me super angry that I wasn't actually invited to see her get married after being friends for almost 17 years. It's made me that angry I don't even want to reply to the invite which I got today and is rsvp by tomorrow!
Maybe I'm being irrational but it's like she posted it today on purpose so I don't have time to reply, it was hand delivered at 9.30 this evening only noticed as the outside light turned on when she walked sneakily up my driveway!

Sorry for the rant

Oh Amy that's rubbish, glad AF is alsmost over tho. Hope you feel better

I've had a pretty crap night myself. Went out for dinner with friends and got ambushed with a pregnancy announcement from one of my BFs. I'm so so happy for her but I got the distinct impression everyone else there already knew and it was all for my benefit.

I imagine they got together to have a chat about "poor fedup" beforehand and decided how best to do it. That was not the way.

Held it together then came home and cried for a solid hour. Not about them or even for me, just the pity they must feel for me.

Fedup that is not cool of your friends, I think I would have just made my excuses and left. Some people just don't get how hard this is for us

Paco go for it if you feel up to it. I think we MC at a similar time, DH and I have managed to dtd once but I'm just not ready mentally, we've tried a few times since but I feel more like crying than getting jiggy .

Thanks Mimi it was definitely not a good way to tell me but I do (after a long sleep and some serious thinking) feel it was just misguided rather than malicious. Still hurt though.

It will get better Mimi it just takes time.

I'm now on cd27, last month my cycle was 28 days but the month before was 31 so no idea when to expect AF.

I still have fuller boobs although they have eased a bit and I'm tired but don't want to get my hopes up to be disappointed.

Fedup I don't know how you got through that. I think I would have walked out! Have my fx for you too, hoping your signs are for a bfp

Mimi I feel the same as you. Now af is almost over and my new cycle is beginning, the prospect of ttc again is making me emotional. I want to be pregnant again but the worry and 'what ifs' are a lot to deal with.

Had s chat with dh about the wedding invite. He's annoyed too.
I understand that at registry offices there aren't always many seats for guests. When we got married however we made room for friends and had 3 friends each out of the 30 spaces for everyone, she and her fiancé were included. We've decided to ignore the invite. Again though this is a classic example of being ignored because of our situation and I've decided, despite our long 'friendship' I don't need her in my life so she's gone. I have one very supportive friend who has text me everyday since we lost our baby, just to say she hopes I'm ok. Not a question I need to reply to, she just wants me to know she's thinking of me. I'm grateful for friends like her.

Hugs to FedUp and Amy*.

Not the best way to tell you but I think you are right that there was no malice intended. I am glad you made it through it.

Amy that is just wierd. I can't imagine being that disorganised.

fedup that was not the best way to tell you, hugs to you.

Amy that is weird. Is she a very disorganised person?

mimi well when it came down to it I couldn't do it in the end. Think I just got excited that my body was still working and terrified in case I never ovulated again. There are good and bad days still. I still haven't been able to return to work. I don't think I'm in the best head space to try to conceive again.

Well the proper bleeding has started now so should all be over by the weekend. No point in ringing the EPU again as there is nothing they can do. Will ring them Monday to cancel Wednesday's scan and then it's back to the fertility clinic we go as hopefully they can look into why it keeps happening.

I'm sorry snowberry take care

Oh no Snowberry I'm so sorry this is happening to you again. I hope you get some answers from the fertility clinic. Take it easy today if you can.

Amy I don't think I'd go to the evening do if it was me either.

Fedup that is rather insensitive. I'm sure they thought they were doing it with good intentions but not very well thought out! I hope you're feeling better today. Maybe you could, when you're feeling up to it and see them again, just let them know it was hurtful and how they could do it better if the situation ever arises for anybody in their lives again.

I've had some spotting again this morning (well more lumpy brown cm chunks, some small flecks of red, sorry for TMI!), and my breasts are so incredibly painful. I feel like my body is leading me on though and nothing is going to come of it. DP is very much in the mood at the moment (and oh so broody!) but since I've started spotting I just can't bring myself to dtd. I know it's silly but I can't help but worry that if there is a bean trying to nestle in, I don't want to do anything at all that could disturb that process. Whatever his ego might like to believe, I know he won't be poking about anywhere near where implantation could happen but I'm still so nervous!

Oh Snowberry I'm so sorry you are going through this again. Do you have someone with you?

Snowberry so sorry you're going though this. I hope the fertility clinic can give you some answers.

Insufficiently how many dpo are you?

As for my friend, she is very organised which is what makes me think she posted it late on purpose or possibly wasn't going to invite us. As I work with one of my other close friends, I know the date she's getting married already as my friend has been invited to the actual wedding but not me, so thinking she thought 'oh I better invite them to the evening'. I'm going to tell our other close friend when I get to work later to tell her, I can come but I don't want to because I'm so angry. I don't want to talk to her until I've calmed down and maybe not even then. It's really offended me and again made me feel isolated.

According to my app I'm 12dpo. I thought I'd ovulated earlier by 2 days which would make me 14dpo so perhaps not. Been spotting since Tues but very light. Only normally spot a couple of hours before AF is due

amy I wouldn't go and would be angry too.

Ok I may have had a slight accident. In my will we or won't we go for it before first af due back it appears we have inadvertently gone for it. Got a positive ovulation test today, entered it into my app and the fertile window has now shifted. We dtd for the first time on Wednesday so it could be a possibility. whoops!!!