TTC after miscarriage - new thread

[InsufficientlyCaffeinated]

I just spotted that the old thread was now closed to new messages so thought I'd start another. The old thread for reference: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2457787-TTC-1-after-miscarriage-looking-for-some-buddies

Sorry paco for your loss xx

Jo you're not our until af arrive, have my fingers crossed for you

Thanks Amy ouch for the pain. I had 2 uti with one leading to kidney infection since MC and it sucks! I only had my first a year ago and it's horrid!

Elderberries I don't think my DH knows the exact date but knows the month and says he misses my weekly ovia updates I used to send. I know it is hard and the pressure of the fertile window. I hope you can relax also currently having a glass to celebrate half term ending. I love spending time with them but I am utterly exhausted and loving just crashing on the sofa!

Sorry for your loss paco. I hope you are doing okay. I'm still in limbo waiting for my first af. Im so tired after first week back at work. Just want to feel normal again

I was actually in Hosp for urinary sepsis when I miscarried so I know all about them! Do look after yourself, drink lots of water and rest. Most importantly keep going back to the doctors if you don't feel better xx

The pains gone off again now. I have UTI's a lot, usually have burning when I pee though but don't this time. I'm going to pop into work tomorrow and pinch a pee stick to test and see if I have anything in my urine. Can just ring the Drs on Monday they'll prescribed without having to test me then if that's what it is.

Have a stock of cranberry juice in the cupboard will keep me hydrated if nothing else. Hoping its just a muscle spasm else I'll have an itchy foo with antibiotics again! Urgh isn't being female awful lol!

We bumped into one of dh's friends and his wife when we went to London the other day. The wife has always been lovely and we get on well when we all meet up but we fall into the 'couple friends' category. She suffered two mc and fundraises for Saying Goodbye. She is very vocal about raising awareness so, even though we weren't particularly close, when I was struggling the other week I sent her a message and she has since been an amazing support. When we bumped into each other she gave me a hug. It made me realise just how life altering mc is. She never said anything, but there was a definite 'I get it' moment in that hug. A comfort that no one else could give because no one else understands. Not even DH, who was devastated by our loss. I think it's important to remember that the men are affected very differently. I won't ask dh the due date because he won't remember and it isn't because he doesn't care, it is because he is moving forward. However, it will upset me that he doesn't remember. He doesn't remember the date of his grandfather's passing and they couldn't have been closer. I'm changed forever because I am the one who has been pregnant and lost my pregnancy. I had a little cry in tesco today because there was a cute baby grow and I should have been buying it for our baby. The only people who understand are people who have been there. Which is why i'm so glad this forum exists.

Thanks for sharing Loki. Can relate to your post completely. Big hugs all around xx

Hi everyone, hope you're all ok and having a nice start to the weekend.
It's peeing it down with rain, looks like we're in for the day.

I'm still getting these awful cramps, they were waking me up in the night. I popped to work and fetched a pee stick, urine is clear, ph good, no electrolytes or protein so don't know what the cause of the cramps is other than impending af!
I've had a slight 0.4 drop in my bbt this morning, if it drops again I can expect af 7dpo according to ff and ovia. Feel rough as a dog, nauseous and dizzy. Not normal af symptoms for me but maybe to do with it being the first one since mc.

Loki thanks for sharing, so great you have a supportive and understanding friend there when you need them. It's great when people recognise the deep hurt inside and no words are needed to show their comfort and support.
I only have my mum to talk to to, after losing my twins everyone ignored me didn't know what to say and made me feel awkward. This time is no different, my friends don't know what to say to me and just presume because I have a smile on my face, I'm going to work and living that I'm fine when I actually feel a bit dead on the inside! My subconscious is crying constantly!

Aw Amy sorry to hear you are feeling like that. Hopefully you'll feel better soon. I think the first AF is likely to be different, I felt funny in the lead up but when it actually came it was ok. The body is such a complex thing!

I know what you mean about people not knowing what to say either. There are all these wonderful people on this forum and I wonder if anyone I know in real life is like that, if you know what I mean. Miscarriage for some reason is such a taboo it's really odd

Cheeky you've hit the nail on the head. I feel the same way and wonder the same things.
I don't understand why miscarriage is such a taboo, ladies in a daily basis go through what we've been through all over the world. We're fortunate to have support here, many women go through this completely alone not knowing if what they feel is normal or not.

I know - there should be more awareness and generally a more talked about topic in my opinion. When I'm at work I often look around at all my colleagues and wonder if they have been through it. You would never know because no one mentions it! I always wonder if they went through the same motions. I think it would be easier to get through it that way.

Hi Paco. Sorry you find yourself with us.

Hugs Elderberries. DH not being able to finish is a fairly constant problem in this house. Some months we manage to crack it and get a good run at things, sometimes we just have a terrible month of it. This month was a bad one and I got upset and then he couldn't perform at all. We missed the whole fertile window, which didn't matter in the end as I got massively upset and stressed and didn't ovulate for the first time ever. I doubt DH would remember our due date but not out of badness. I will be reminding him though as I will need his support.

Happy Anniversary Amy and MrAmy. Glad you had a nice time.

Hugs Loki.

I have started spotting, so that will be AF here. Then we can draw a line under this month and get back in the saddle next month. DH leaves for a work course tomorrow and gets back on Friday. At least AF had the grace to come at a sensible time.

DDog is a bit pacey and uncomfortable today. He has had a couple of bad days this week already. Vets for him early next week I think. I have a horrible feeling he doesn't have that much time left with us.

Sorry to hear about your dog Brenna. It's so hard with dogs because they give you so much don't they?
I'm having a bit of an emosh. I have been gripped by the 'I need to be pregnant' feeling. Massive, hormonal swing from the other day when I didn't think I could handle it. I don't think we dtd enough during my fertile time so it's unlikely and I'm having 'lack of shagging' regret! Urgh. I wish I could stop being so up and down!

for all of you struggling it is so good to have this place where people get it

So after being convinced I hadn't ovulated I am 2-4 days late for AF.

I think I may be pg, boobs are killing me and I have a rash like the last times.

I POAS this morning. It looks very faintly positive. But worried it should be darker a few days late and it's all going to Ho wrong again

Album stay positive! What kind of test did you use?

Hope you are all hanging in there. Checking in to say I got my BFP last week so I'm 6+1 today. Swinging back and forth between excitement and worry. When I had my mc in July last year, along with the sadness of the loss was my sadness that I wouldn't have the innocence of my first pregnancy again. And as I thought the excitement didn't hit us right away as we were trying to be cautious after the heartbreak last time.

But a week on I think I'm letting myself be positive and excited now and allowing myself to think ahead to the due date. I'm only 6+1 and my mc was at 10 so I still have a long way to go and of course there is worry but i still feel very happy.

Hope good news are in store for everyone here after what we've had to go through

How many dpo are you Albus? symptoms sounds promising maybe try with a FRER?

Congratulations Lillian. I hope this one is a sticky bean.

Finger crossed Albus. That sounds good, I hope it works out.

Thanks Loki. He is 13 and I have had him since he was 4. He was a wreck when I got him and has turned into a cheeky nutter. My life is going to be simpler but very empty without him. Hopefully we get a bit longer yet. He took a lot of work to rehabilitate but he has given it back a million fold.

Lillian congrats, wishing you an uneventful pregnancy.

Albus have my fingers crossed it all works out for you.

Still feel crappy myself, had cramps earlier but have gone off now. Hoping for a better nights sleep tonight.

Congratulations Lillian and fingers crossed for Albus

I was just thinking we needed a new announcement soon!

Congrats Lillian. I didn't think I had ovulated this month so hard to sY but according to ovia about 16 days

Using an IC but it is super faint DH almost thinks I am imagining it

The ic were super faint for me long after the frer was as dark as the control line. I'd test with one of those if I were you. Good luck!

Thanks what brand is free?

Frer!