The BESH are cheating on Luck with Irony, all Hags aboard for the ironiclusterdiff of the decade (for the B's and the none B's!)

[Blue2014]

You know the drill by now ...

Rules of Entry - must be over 30, TTC no. 1 for over a year, be suitably evil and Hag like, willing to shout Cunt at the moon on regular occasions, consume extra gin when our fellow hags are unable to, and to get the nipple tassles out for any successful Hag ...

No admittance without a complete BESHtionnaire - see below.

Cramping just got a lot worse, I can only assume I'm due to bleed ...

Barking that is ridiculous that a blood test is inconclusive. One can tell you if your numbers are in the right ball park. The second can tell you if those numbers are rising enough for a successful pregnancy.

Keeping everything crossed for the cramping to subside.

Best of luck Blue. Toe holds for you both.

I took a bucket Barking! ok two it bloody worked hags, BFP now just to worry about every single step from here

Whoop!!!!!!!

Thanks Barking, you were up early, hope you doing ok

cautious congrats blue

Blue congratulations!!! Best news ever!!!!!

So happy that the BFPs are landing on Hagland!!

Hooray blue! I think I might have got something in my eye...

Thanks lovely Hags

Woohoo, well done Blue!!

Barking how are you doing?

Barking, hope you're doing alright - really holding my breath it works out.

Bloody get the fuck in though, blue, that's fantastic

This morning's line is much fainter and I'm bleeding red again, this time it's watery, not clotted at all. #hatethisshit. Why couldn't I just get a bfn instead of going through this? I just can't see this working out.

Oh god Barking, I'm so sorry, you are right this is so unfair - I hate this shit for you too

Here is a salmon of solidarity for you, barking. What a fucking headfuck. It ain't over yet, hag, and you have all of the ESH rooting for you.

How's it going barking and blue?

Hi Coop - not much from me just about to order a shit load of tests so I can POAS to reassure myself whenever needed

How're you?

Eeek, I can't imagine how that feels. Everything is crossed for you

I'm meh, MrC is away with work until Saturday and it's my "fertile week" this week, will probably be too late by the time he gets home, so another one wasted. But not really wasted coz how many "fertile weeks" have we not wasted and still feck all?
Feeling very bitter today apparently

Yeah we missed loads of fertile weeks too, after 4 years I got to the point where I didn't care was relieved to not have to TTC shag

This is the place for us to be bitter hag, it's even in our title

Hi fizz!
coop yeah, you get to thinking why fucking bother?
Blue you keep pissing on sticks, but remember they're not reliably going to get darker every day so don't freak out if they don't. Take it from one who can't follow her own advice.

My hcg came back today at 411, so for today I am still pg. Clinic won't repeat it though to see if it's rising, as the levels are 'fine' so there's no need. Er.. just the 5 days of bleeding and the history of 3 miscarriages?
I'm going to call the gp in the morning and see if I can get referred to epu for extra monitoring on the basis of my history. I'm fed up of fighting the clinic even if we have paid them thousands of pounds and I just want one little blood test
I told DCW the blood result was good and his reaction was 'gutted, we're still in limbo then?' Which was a strange response. Clearly he just wants the limbo over and would rather that happened sooner rather than later. But that of course is only going to happen if it's a negative confirmation. Good job I'm the one with it inside as I think he might have given up and hit the booze...

Men are idiots Barking but yay for you being diffed. This is really stressful for you and I'm a bit pissed off at your clinic to be honest, I don't see why they won't let you just throw everything at it but the GP discussion sounds a good plan fuck the clinic

Thanks for the tips of piss sticks - I haven't done one since Saturday and thought I might try a weekly POAS. I feel like I don't want to though as I'm not ready for things to go wrong just yet. If all goes well enough I'll book for a private scan - trying to hold out until nearly 7 weeks but I seriously doubt I'll do that! Will be 5 weeks tomorrow (if all goes well - note I have said that sentence about 14 million times in the last few days, what must it be like to be a naive instadiffer??)

Oh and I first read "why fucking bother" as "why bother fucking" that's something only a Hag could misread

Coop good to see you, hag. I understand your frustration. Mr Erica´s job seems to have hacked my Clue app and always send him away during ov time... it sucks but it seems unlikely i will get my baybee just by shagging at the right time so whatever...

Blue I get the weekly POAS but as Barking said, do not get too obsessed with how light-dark they are. I think you can get a scan at 6 weeks to check that "there is something there" but hb you have to wait to 6.5 or 7 weeks.

Barking Great about hcg levels, I get that you are pissed off with Mr Barking. The amount of times Mr Erica has said something that makes me want to scream "REALLY??? FUCKIN REALLY???".

I am very bitter because over two months after mc and nothing has really changed... I think I may be ovulating but who cares if it is likely there is post mc tissue stuck to my womb, effectively acting as an IUD and there is nothing I can do about this for another 3 weeks at least? FUCK IT!!

For the record Barking my HCG number on day 19 was 56 so I think yours look pretty amazing! You can always go to a private GP and get bloods taken - obviously you'd have to pay for it but they are less likely to argue against it, if you want to make sure the numbers are doubling?

Blue I'd stay away from the sticks if I were you. I've seen many a hag driven slowly mad from micro analysing the depth of shade of the line. Get a private scan booked for 7-8 weeks as they should be able to see the heartbeat by then. If you are planning to have the Harmony test then you get two scans, one at 10 and one at 12 weeks which are super thorough and much better than the NHS basic nuchal fold scan. Too much for you to think about at the moment but come over to the PESH when you're ready to talk about such things. I'll keep my tassels waiting for your arrival Hags.

Thanks for the tips. I don't even know what a harmony test is Fab so ill google nearer the time in case it doesn't get there far

I haven't told my GP yet, should I tell her? I don't want everything to go wrong and then get refused my NHS IVF because I got (private IVF) diffed

Erica, it's such a shitty position to be in. The waiting with no control is so unfair which means you have ever right to be Hag like bitter about it. baguettes to you my dear

blue if you're happy to pay private you could wait until a private scan before going to the gp, or even wait until after a harmony scan. They'd probably prefer you in the system in time to book your 12 week scan but if you want to keep the ivf/pg to yourself for now I'd say that's up to you. Given some women lucky fuckers don't even find out they are pg until 12 weeks it's not going to be unheard of.

I went to my GP, and asked due to my history of rmc to be referred to epu. She was properly lovely and immediately agreed, and also said they'd do bloods at the surgery. My hcg on Wednesday was 1300, so for now I'm still pg, but I'm not getting excited as my levels rose in previous pregnancies and it didn't get me any further. I've got a scan booked at the epu on Thursday, when I'll in theory be 5+6, so potentially too early to see a heartbeat, but at least if there's something there we should see a sack and foetal pole.

I'm going to try and book woo needles on Wednesday evening to help with the anxiety. Got an intralipids drip booked today.