The Angry Pubes of Bumsnet

[juneybean]

No wankers allowed.

BFPs for everyone!

###STATS###

Sparkly, honestly, who cares if you lose it with the nurse tomorrow? Look, you are human, despite how perfectly amazingly stoical you appear on here, you cannot go on having chemical pregnancies and for it not to affect you. My love, please cry tomorrow at the nurse. Don't hold back. Please ask her if you can have the beta blood test in future on the day you get your BFP.

I also suggest you start a thread here on MN asking for advice about all of this. Change your username if you feel shy or embarrassed or just nervous. You don't need to say you have been using AI. There is an absolute wealth of knowledge on here if you will just reach out. I can only suggest so much, and there are few others on this bus who will be able to give advice. Please use the wonderful advice out there

Spinning i have not wrote anything down , i think thats a brilliant idea, as i know i will forget

Dearest darling Sparkly the other ladies have said everything already but I had to come on and send you some more love. You deserve to get answers and you deserve to get them with respect. Nobody should have to fear making a phonecall to a medical professional, especially when it is for such an emotive reason as yours. I am so cross on your behalf that this nurse has made you feel this way in the past - yes, her words/actions may be 'following the rules' but there is such a thing as 'bedside manner' and there must be nurses who get the information across in a kinder, more supportive way. Is there anyway you can get your DH in on a three-way phone call so you know he is there and if she starts being rude or upsetting you he can jump in with some support? Do you have names of any other nurses you could speak to instead? Does your consultant have a secretary you could call? I had to book an appt with my consultant via his secretary last week and whilst she doesn't have any medical knowledge she was absolutely lovely and maybe more 'human', so you could call them and explain what is going on and why you would like to speak to a different nurse to last time?

Sorry for rambling on - you have been so helpful and so supportive to all of the bus passengers that I can't bear the thought of you upset and being treated badly

Sparkly, do you remember me saying that some fertility say that a prog score below 30 will not support a pregnancy? Just because your score was decent-ish at 7dpo does not mean it doesn't rapidly plummet taking an embryo with it. I would bet my last pound that you need prog support.

Fertility consultants that should read, Sparkly*.

Rainy that's so lovely of you but focus on yourself mrs! You only get a limited time in the app so use it wisely. I'm sorry you are feeling like that about it. Try and look at this as a positive step forward, this is going to get you closer to your baby. This app could be the start of answers. And those will ultimately be of help for moving onwards. Tomorrow is the start of something positive and it's going to renew your faith and give you hope. I'm sure of it

Sparkly, please can I see today's chart?

I'm getting you some help from a wonderful friend who has just suffered her third chemical pregnancy after IVF (she has had to go down the assisted route as both her tubes are irreparably damaged). Hang on in there while I try to get answers from her tonight re what should happen tomorrow when you ring your nurse. If anyone knows what they're talking about re chemicals it's my friend

Oh sparkly just got home from a walk and read your update. I agreed other all the advice you've got here. Praying for you my lovely.
daisy we do park run too. alpha my step daughter and I often walk it, don't be intimidated, it's supportive not competative.

melon how are you? Thinking of you. Bloody love that dress.

welcome to the newbies

spinning I once found my evening standard copy in the fridge and my dinner in the recycling.

rainy thinking of you tomorrow hope it goes ok. Xxxxx

I'm very behind but wanted to come on to give sparkly the biggest hug ever.

boris I'm ok thanks. Still no sign of AF (now 8 days late) Feeling quite positive, started running today and have treated myself to some summer dresses

Purds amazingly Stoical? Ha. I ain't amazing in any way tonight! I'm a quivering mess! Thanks. The "trunchbull" will not appreciate tears.. Ha. I think that's what I'm gonna call her as she reminds me of her! Trunchbull. Yep. Should I just explain that exactly the same sequence of events happened in January? And I can't go on like this every few months? How much do you bet she says "these two are probably a fluke and next time will be fine" good idea about the new thread. Don't care about username changing, I may do that. Thank you. You are right, there's so much knowledge out there, I need to make use of it! Agreed on the prog score! Although one clinic said 20 one said 30! I think mine was the 20. It worries me that they haven't checked my prog since last July and are happy that two were 30.6 and that's it case closed! Well, my three before were 28, 28.6 and 11.5.. Why do they not get taken into consideration?!

Pug you are so lovely thank you for your words and kindness. Unfortunately this is the sister for the fertility clinic and she is our only point of contact in the hospital.. There are no other nurses as specialised as her apparently. The consultant prob does have a secretary but specifically said I had to call that nurse with any queries. I guess all I can do is try and if I'm not happy with the response then find another avenue than her. Hope you are doing ok???

Purdey for the love of god woman are you a saint?! Thank you so much for asking your friend!! The good news is I have a chart for you. The bad news is I didn't temp today as couldn't face seeing the temp drop... chart attached

Thanks Boris and Pikz
I haven't been near the April thread in days, and quite frankly can't face going through it all again so may be staying put here for a while hope that's ok ladies. I think everyone is on here too right? So I'm not abandoning anyone I hope!

Melon glad you are feeling more positive really good news

rainy good luck for your appt. I will look forward to hearing.

sparkly I hope you are taken seriously. This is not the time for insensitivity! Hope you're doing ok

Purdie your poor friend what a terrible time she's had having gone through IVF too. I hope so much she gets her baby. There must be a way. She deserves a break poor thing

sparkly .

Sparkly, my friend is asking: has your last miscarriage been recorded anywhere?

Purds Well my gp typed it into her notes on screen. God knows about the fertility clinic. They have the report from the ward I was in, not sure but it may have said "suspected early mc" as that's what doctors said to us

Well then Sparkly if this is the specialist nurse with all the knowledge then stand your ground and be firm that you'd like some answers from her. I know very little about progesterone levels but from what you've said now is definitely the time for them to be repeating the tests. I hope Purdie's friend can give you some ideas on what to be doing next. Positive vibes will be winging their way north of the border to you tomorrow morning. Perhaps you could try picturing Trunchbull naked to give you the upper hand of confidence during the conversation?! You are so sweet to even think of asking how I am (all seems to be fine and I have my first appointment with the diabetes consultant and specialist nurses this Friday which I am looking forward to).

Melon Assembling a search party for your AF. Torches? check. Loud shouty voices? check? Sniffer dogs? We have plenty on hand but may leave them as a last resort!

Has anyone heard from eskimo for a few days?

Oh no I am so sorry Sparkly Ok as an NHS manager I will tell you know that the best way forward is to make an informal complaint (that way they have to respond to it within 48 hours, formal complaints it's 30 working days). Complain your ass off and if the managers of the service are anything like the ones I work with (including me) they will suddenly get their asses into gear!

My AF arrived :( Also almost passed out in the restaurant during DH's birthday meal. Have informed work I won't be in tomorrow.

Now not know!

Eeek take it easy night you've lost a lot of fluids over the weekend. Rest up and drink water x

Oh Night I'm so sorry AF has arrived and also for dh birthday dinner!!! What a shame. How you feeling now?? That's terrible . Must be some bug? On the positive.. You and I can officially skip off into the may BFP sunset together as cycle buddies. Every cloud eh... !
Thanks for the inside NHS info. The number of times I should have complained over the years is def double digits.. But I never did, mainly because I was worried of the treatment I would get after and didn't want to risk it. And without sounding like a wimp, I feel much the same about this!

Just asked DP to make a wish as an eyelash fell out. He asked me if I knew what he'd wished for so I said that we'd have a baby. That Southampton would finish above Liverpool was the correct answer