'Is Foundation Feminist?' Who gives a shiny shit? On this 'ere March bus we want career-destroying babies!

[PurdeyPie]

So you're a hedge-fund manager who wears Reiss suits and Clarks shoes but the allure of nappies and nannies is growing stronger? Yep. You're on the right buzz. We're heading straight for Knocked-Upsville and we've got an on-board telly for watching OBEM and slagging off the scrotes who go to th'ospickal clutching a Lidl carrier bag. Come and join us. Don't be coy. Don't forget yer lube and soy.

frog sorry for bfn first off... Give it time. Second... Dub? No. Never heard of it. Did gp have a look at the cervix?

Ps my stats are below, however I'm over on the April bus too as that's when my BFP is due!

sparkly123, age 30, TTC #1, cycle 7, BFP due 11 april

Sat in the lunch room listening to them bitch and moan about everyone else. Obvs, when I leave they'll bitch that I didn't join in

Love the title thread. Too funny.

Mrsb excuse my language but this is very apt for you--

Mils words yesterday " maybe you should give yourself two or three months to not think about baby stuff, not do anything, just put it into a little box in the back of your mind and forget about it for a while, take a break "

Yeh.

sparkly love it!

to your MIL. Sounds like mine.

All this talk of Nutella is making me drool. Has everyone tried the 3 ingredient Nutella brownies. Big hit in our house.

Sparkly I didn't even take my pants off, so no cervix checking!

Toadie, that cake blows my effort for Nancy's first birthday out of the water. For this reason alone you can feck off to the back of the bus.

Frog..what the?! I thought you were pregnant! The bleeding you describe (post-sex) sounds more like cervical erosion to me, not uterine. S'nowt to be alarmed about though. When I was lobbing progesterone suppositories up my vagina to support my pregnancy there was brown sludge and pink spotting aplenty. 'Twas cervical erosion, said my clinic.

Heir, there is no cake left

Free Cadbury Creme Eggs this morning at baby group! What a Brucie bonus! The posh lady who runs the gig announced that they were 'a gift for all the mummies' from the church 'coz it iz Easter, innit. Anyway, she made a point of enunciating the word 'one' when offering us the ecclesiastical treat so I duly took two when no-one was looking. Serves her right for holding her baby group in a socio-economically-deprived area

Sparkly, I choked on my fit (in the sexual sense) cake at that meme! Love it

..which reminds me, if you're not already fb friends with GlitteryLipgloss then you should be. Utterly profane and offensive statuses. Brilliant.

I have just Cillit-Banged my entire kitchen - plug sockets, microwave knobs and t'lot. This is highly unusual; typically I wipe the baby's face if I happen to be passing (highly unlikely; she is usually tinkering with perilous kitchen paraphernalia whilst I am in the lounge on Mumsnet) and the toilet seat if guests are coming and that is it.

It is not a pregnancy symptom. How do I know? I know because, in the final stages of pregnancy, when all pregnant women are frantically 'nesting' and scrubbing their skirting boards and the tops of doors, I was sat on my arse watching True Movies. All day. And all night. In fact, I suspect those women who do 'nest' while pregnant are simply filthy slatterns whose careers have rendered them domestic sluts

Sparkly, tell your meddlesome MIL to put herself in a little box and mail herself to Guatemala.

Purds creme egg thief!! would havd done the same, dairy milk or not

Hands up for cervical erosion! Me too! That's why was asking frog if they checked, as it was my first thought too. Seems strange they didn't even look frog ! How long until Gynae?

Recipe please frog!

Off for my two-hour nap

Guatemala!!!! Ha ha ha alrighty! She means well really, just sometimes gets irritating!

I fear I'm missing out not joining Facebook..

Nesting shmesting. You are preggers though

Any room in that box for my mother? Last night she was full it 'just relax no point going back to the GP with your 2 week cycle moans'

Gahhhhhgdhrgrhtr! they've no idea have they?. She dtd once in 1986 and once in 1989 and bang here me and my brother are!

Half marking my place... half pestering gloopyghoul to post the red velvet recipe.

Purdey; it is not theft of a creme egg unless the terms and conditions stated that the item being proffered was limited to a single item. I would've taken two (or even three). Also... I had to re-read as at a glance I thought you had clit-banged you entire kitchen. Thought it was some new fangled sex position that the kids are doing! Haha!!

oh and stats are...
###wotsits, 35, ttc#2, bfp due 5th April (ish) ###

Place marking.

Some one just asked me if I've been on holiday and said I look really well. Must be preggo as it can't be a result of staying up all night with my mates drinking prosecco at centre parcs.

stumbles on board spilling OPK sticks and folic acid tablets everywhere

Yay new bus!!

Omg I'm so glad it wasn't just my filthy mind that read purdey's post as "clit-banged"!!

Hahaha clit banged! Whatever it takes hey ladies?!

wooly Thank god it wasn't just me! And thank god she hadn't actually clit-banged her kitchen!

Clit banger! ha ha. Get that woman out of the kitchen!

Dilemma time for me ladies. I didn't even realise I was on CD 10, but I am. And got a flashing smiley today on CB meaning high fertility. I want to still do Smep this cycle but had decided on CD 12 onwards. However, given that I'm having high fertility already I think I may ovulate sooner rather than later this cycle.. So I'm thinking AI tonight then miss out Tomor and go again Cd 12. You think this is ok? Purds I think will then do 12 miss 13 and do 14... Thoughts?

sparkly also cd10 today! Woo cycle buddy! Bfn on opk yesterday for me but feeling rather damp downstairs today! Need to dtd tonight methinks. I never know how often to dtd as if the bloke has poor sperm you aren't meant to do it too often apparently but who knows? Actually does anyone know?! EOD ok?!

sparkly I got 6 flashing Smiley's before a peak so be careful you dont wear him out too early!

Vic we ve never been cycle buds before! Wooo! I think EOD is good for you with the spermies. Dh is happy to do it and doesn't feel worn out as such I just worry about the quality starting so early and wonder if any point in CD 10. However his count is good and if we miss a day in between that should give him lots if time to build up again.

wotsits I usually get two days of flashing before peak..I forgot about your six!! Tonnes!!