TTC after MC #5

[Bristolian1]

New thread!
This thread pretty much does what it says on the tin...
Shall we start with some stats?
I'm 32, TTC since last Jan, 2x MMC last year and on second cycle of trying again.

Oh, then I may have two more weeks to wait until bfn. My plan was to see how it is a week from now and if not weakening there must be retained products still there. Luckily I will then be in the country were I trust medical system more, so can really get help if needed quickly. Unfortunately I have a tendency to retain stuff, so do not trust my body about getting cleanout neither. But at least its easter hols from tomorrow!

kep the small amount of hcg that is turning your ic positive will be being picked up by your opk and making it darker....opk are fooled by hcg as it is so similar in structure to lh. Not that that means you won't ov soon so keep dtd!

brickie yep I've been dipping opks with my hpts as I was interested to see them both fade i am so sad - I am just keeping an eye on the opks to see when they start getting darker rather than lighter as I presume this will show the lh surge (as they won't be getting darker as my hcg is falling) it makes sense to me, not sure about anyone else

And definitely carrying on dtd - my sex drive seems to have come back with a vengeance - DH is getting over man-flu so I have been frustrated! Going to get him drunk and have my wicked way tonight

Quiet on here. Hope that means you're all enjoying the weekend. right now I could murder my dh... No real reason other than he is doing my head in!

Haha MrsD, I feel like that sometimes too... whereabouts are you in your cycle?

I'm just sitting feeling sorry for myself. I've had this cold with gut-retching cough for over a week now. I just want it to go away...

Despite that and also feeling utterly tired I've jumped DP last night... Because I was still getting little blobs of EWCM... I hope we have a good chance this month, we've been DTD every 2-3 days so far. If not, well... I'm going to cry and drown myself in hot chocolate with cake!

Am preoccupying myself from poas by eating my weight in Chipstix, chocolate and decaf tea ready for the hills!!! Sinus and chest infection taking their time in shifting - I feel your pain carrot

CD 15 here. Haven't had a positive opk but they haven't worked for me for a while. Think I've been ov around CD 16 lately based on pain and ewcm. So far we've DTD on days 9, 10, 12 and 14. Hope to continue efforts tonight and tomorrow... Might have to start being nice to dh

We've been eating chipstix and mini egg cakes here. Should go bake a real cake. Feeling very lazy. Miserable weather and having mil round isn't helping to motivate me...

CD 17 and still don't think I ov'd. No ewcm, no rise in sex drive, no positive opk although I did run out of them a few days ago lol.
We did dtd on day 11/12/13/14/17 just in case

Happy weekend everyone! Hope it's a good one. Chopsticks and mini eggs seems like a very good idea! May need a Tesco run although we're going out for a curry soon.

Not entirely sure what my cycle has done this month. Had EWCM around day 14 but not positive opk, had it again 7 days ago - about CD22 - along with a very strong pain low down in one side so I guess that could have been O although I didn't use any OPKs to check. According to my normal cycle of 28 days AF was due yesterday but hasn't arrived yet. I did have one brief episode of brown tinged EWCM yesterday morning and so am now obsessing that I may have O'd late and that could have been implantation. Feeling very tired and weeing for England but I know that could just be PMS signs too. Trying to decide whether to use the one FRER that I have tomorrow morning or whether to wait until mon/tues.

I'm cacking myself - I want to be pregnant but I also know that this could all be just my body trying to adjust to normal. I'm finding it hard to think about anything else!

Can I join please? I had an mmc on 12th Feb at 9 weeks and I'm on my second cycle post-mc. I'm 35 and it was my first pregnancy. I got my first period 4 weeks and a day after the mc and was very relieved. On CD 15 today and no positive OPK. I usually ovulate on CD 17 so I shouldn't be worried yet, but for some reason I am really worried that it won't happen and that I'll not ovulate for months.

Sorry that you are all on this page as well. Fingers crossed for everybody x

probably I'm rubbish and would probably test tomo, but if I could muster up some willpower would wait till Mon/Tues. Not helpful but fingers crossed for you

redredwine you will ov. Mc just sometimes muddles things up for a bit. Sorry you find yourself here but big welcome anyway. Lots of lovely ladies here unfortunately.

Thanks Mrs! The test is currently in the kitchen cupboard as far from my bathroom as possible just to put me off trekking downstairs to get it to test my FMU. I'm very lazy first thing I the morning so it might delay me a bit! I'm having a few cramps but I have been since yesterday and no AF yet....got a stinking headache and still running for a wee every half an hour. Aargh!! I'd told myself not to obsess over everything and now I can't think of anything else.

Hello redredwine, nice to meet you! Although obviously sorry that you're here iykwim!

Hello ladies, apologies I have not read back yet but will do. Just wanted to get this out. Have been with DH for over half my life, like since 16. Different friends come and go but he tries with mine and vice versa, I have always struggled with his group, male, loud, farmer types, lots of different partners. Struggled as in tried but every time I made friends with the partner they moved on. So I started again for his sake. Lots of dinners and new home visits. Recently they have all settled down and we have started to reform a group.
I did not want to tell any of them about mc but understood dh did. One girl in particular struggled to conceive, took a few years, I was a shoulder, etc. and she has talked to me about my mc. I was grateful for that and we were becoming good friends. It was hard because we were at school together and were never close but we forged a friendship. She, I and the other two girls started to get on well and I thought were all friends.
I was chatting to a good friend of mine tonight who has a baby girl. She innocently drops in to chat that all three of the wives of dh friends are expecting. I'm so upset, these people I thought were friends are all lying to me. I don't have a disease. I had two mc. What did they think I would not notice when they suddenly turned up with another baby? I have just had a blazing row with dh who says they are just trying to protect me. What a lot of shit. I don't know what to do. I can't stop crying and it's not because they are pregnant it's because of the lies. I feel like everyone's now talking about me rather than to me and I hate that.
Really sorry for bothering you all with this but I feel broken. Sorry. X

Enormous hugs AlltheQueens I know that I would feel just like you if I was in a similar boat, and always feel honesty is the best policy. It's unsurprising that you feel so betrayed.

That having been said, I do think people find announcing pregnancies to those who've suffered losses/ who are struggling, awkward. The main reason being that everyone's terribly British when it comes to emotions and hates doing anything even remotely confrontational/ that could cause an upset. This doesn't excuse their behaviour, they should have told you, but I can also see that once you start lying about this sort of thing it snowballs and telling someone can then seem impossible.

If it's any consolation, a good friend of mine went completely the other way when announcing her pregnancy to me, and over-thought it to such an extent that she chose a lengthy multi-course candle lit meal at an intimate venue from which I had no escape.

Sorry you feel so broken. I often feel that way, but I know from your posts that you are a strong, courageous woman who WILL get through this. You will get that BFP and a healthy sticky bean soon, I just know it.

probably I'm in the same boat - going by my normal cycle AF should've been here yesterday - or today if going by last months days no sign yet...caved and took a test this morning. Bfn could cry. Guessing that means AF is imminent...really thought we'd done what we needed to this month.
Welcome redredwine sorry you're here but you've stumbled into a great group.
allthequeens big hugs for you...know exactly where you're coming from. There's no stigma around mc...it's happened, it's crap but some people just don't know how to react. I dunno if they're afraid of upsetting us? Of how we'll react when it gets brought up? But being 'protected' doesn't help you feeling rubbish, especially by women who you've gotten close to. Get all the tears out of your system, and pick yourself up again. You have been through much much worse--and it has made you stronger. I know you probably don't feel it one little bit at the minute but it has. Big hugs x

Allthequeens - I'm sorry you're feeling so sad, mc is so common yet no one will talk about it which makes it all so much harder.

Yokyil - I also caved first thing and took a test which was bfn. My AF turned up about an hour later. 2015 is clearly not going to be my year :-( I can't help focussing on my age - 40 - I'll be at least 41 when if I have a baby now and I'm scared my chance has gone. I think I need to try and find a hobby to stop me obsessing all the time!

Good morning

Firstly, may I apologise for my outburst last night. I am grateful to you for being there to listen and sorry for rambling on. Did not sleep very well but feeling ok this morning. But shaky as feel like af is on the way and I had let myself believe I might get a BFP this month. Stupid of me to even let myself believe. Not due till tomorrow but pain in left side and grumpy...

redwine welcome and I'm sorry that your first impression of me will be me ranting like a mad women. I'm normally quite nice. I'm sorry you find yourself here and wish you lots of luck for the future.

Hope everyone is ok today. I'm going to stay in my Jammies and potter. I might even eat an Easter egg. One I bought for those who lied to me. (I'm being a cow i know and I will replace it) Xx

probably I'm the result of a 41 year old mummy giving birth...so do not give up hope just gotta stay positive that there's still 9 months left of 2015!!! 9 goes to hopefully make a little bean
allthequeens jammies and an Easter egg sounds like the best idea for some 'me time' enjoy it!!!

Allthequeens glad you woke up feeling a little chirpy,wellit sounds like.i havnt been told about or invited to 2 of my cousins pregnancy or invited to their mega early 20-24 weeks baby showers. Imagine what's gonna happen at my sisters wedding are they gonna pretend they have balloons up their dresses or ate to much cake!!!!people aye. Eat that Easter egg and enjoy it lol.

Caritas that was a lovely post to allthequeens and I'm abit emotional today and I nearly cried you must be s lovely person.

Probably I'm 39,don't rule yourself out yet. Plus I know mums in their 40's one of my cousins from above is 42 actually, it's a shame for her that for her sensitivity has grew as fast as her age.

Morning all. Got my first negative pregnancy test this morning, together with a negative ovulation kit. My cf has dried up and all my feelings of gearing up to ovulate have disappeared - yesterday I had some twinges, so not sure if I've actually ovulated already or if my body is just being weird! It's cd 17 today.

I'm 35, 1DS, had a long break since having DD. Just started TTC again - 3 months now. 1st MC yesterday, not sure that it's sunk in, feel pretty numb plus struggling with jet lag same time. DH feeling deflated. Trying to search for some positives.

Yokilcolds suck. I am finally feeling better, hope you do too Also remember you're not out till AF parks up at your drive

MrsD and brickie looks like you've made a good effort this month. I hope you get rewarded with BFPs

Probably sorry AF got you. Age is just a number, don't worry about it. As you can see, lots of positive stories around, you'll have your story soon too

Welcome redwine, sorry you find yourself here I think it's quite common to ovulate late post mc, my first "normal" cycle was a few days longer than normally.

I'm sorry about your friends' treatment allqueens, I'm sure they meant well, even if they did the wrong thing. I'm glad you're feeling a bit better now, I hope you enjoyed your Easter eggs

Congrats on BFN kep, you can finally turn over that page. I didn't ovulate during wtf cycle, but then my bfn took about 5 weeks... So don't be surprised if AF arrives all of a sudden!

I think I've ovulated on Fri or Sat. But then this morning I had quite uncomfortable pain on my right? Then it disappeared. Maybe it was something else in my gut, as was feeling quite windy too

2dpo... I wish time would speed up...

Welcome bunny, you poor thing, be kind to yourself. I hope your DH is giving you some tlc. We are here if you need to talk

*Meant to write DS not DD in my first post.

Thanks Carrotpuff. Hope the cold buggers off soon. Keeping my fx for you this month.

Hi carrot welcome and

Well I think I'm safely out for this month No sign of ovulation and I'm now at CD19. Had there been a sneaky ovulation that had fertilised then I should have symptoms by now...I always get achy boobs right after conception. It would've been cool to have a baby due at Christmas