TTC after MC #5

[Bristolian1]

New thread!
This thread pretty much does what it says on the tin...
Shall we start with some stats?
I'm 32, TTC since last Jan, 2x MMC last year and on second cycle of trying again.

Thank you for the welcome fizzie and ibeka.

Ibeka I think I will test end of next week to check it's gone back to bfn. After that I'll just be not trying, not preventing for the first while. Would love to get pg quickly again but I can only imagine how terrifying it would be also. The worry just never ends. This thread is full of such strength and bravery. Hoping it rubs off on me :)

Ibeka I ov'd 16 days after getting my BFN but that cycle was a bit strange as I didn't have a break in between my mc bleeding (that went on and on and on) and what I thought was my first post mc period. So it might not be that long for you but I would probably expect it to be a little later than normal.

Hi ladies, results were good. Having hcg checked again on Sat to see if it's doubled. Feeling hopeful. Hope you're all ok x

ibeka I ov'd 14 days after my first day of bleeding so it was just like my normal cycle, but I was only 4.5 weeks pg so it was a chemical, just like a heavy period that was a week late. If you were further along your first cycle might be a bit different. Also apparently opks don't always work in the wtf cycle either x

MissMrs I'm so glad things are looking good still. You too Fizzie.

Welcome mamama

Ibeka I was only 5 1/2 weeks along so, like MissMrs my first cycle has been fairly normal I think. My hpt was negative on the second day of bleeding and I got ewcm positive opks around 12-13 days after that. I've no idea if I actually ovulated though as I don't temp.

After Wednesdays bfn I've kept away from the pee sticks. So far...

Ibeka My loss was at 11+4 although baby was 9 wks. I had a bfn 6 days after ERPC and I have started to see slight ewcm today which is 15 days after bfn. Not sure how much we can read into that as my cycle before pregnancy was 45 days long.

Hello everyone I've not been on this board for a little while as I was having a hard time coping. I lost my baby at just under 16 weeks in January. DP and I decided to take things as they happened - not trying/not preventing - and this morning I got a feint but clear BFP. I don't know whether to laugh or cry - the sheer range of emotions I'm feeling at the moment is staggering.

Probably Congratulations !!

Congrats probably! This is a really supportive board and I know how you feel as I lost my first pg earlier this year and am currently 6 weeks. It is scary but I am trying to take each day as it comes and go from there. Congrats again x

That's lovely news Probably, I really hope everything goes well for you this time. xx

I'm having a wobble here. Got a bfn this morning so I'm out for this month. I feel so angry with myself that I had my chance and I messed it up and now it's never gonna happen for me. I'm not getting any younger and I feel like my time is running out fast.

(I'm sorry for the moany post, I don't have anyone else to talk to in real life and I'm just so desperate. )

Probably that's lovely news but I understand your anxiety also. You will gain comfort and support on this thread.

Marys sorry your feeling low. It's such a rollercoaster of emotions. I was feeling quite good yesterday but very emotional last night. Today I thought I was ok but I seem to be anxious, like when the postman delivered letters through the door this morning I jumped. And a bird flew past my car window as I was driving and I jumped again. Anyone else have anxiety/nervous shortly after d&c/mc? I'm never like this, feel very on edge.

Congratulations probably! This is an entirely new pregnancy and bears no relation to the last. Wishing youan uneventful nine months.

mary sorry you're feeling so low. Your af is not here yet so you might well be pg. However I understand why you are feeling despair at the prospect of no bfp this month. I find all the rumours about being more fertile after mc unhelpful as they just set you up for disappointment. As with everything pg-related, everybody's bodies are different. It is too much pressure to let everybody think and hope they will be pg 1st cycle after mc.

I can totally understand your worries about time. How old are you you don't mind me asking? You were pg very recently remember, so you still work! It's so easy to think every month has to be the one, but it doesn't. One more month will not be affected by any age-related deterioration. Sending you a lot of hugs.

Welcome to the other new people.

I'm on CD 4- BORING

Welcome Mama and Adventure, join in, don't be shy :)

Ibeka I didn't ovulate in wtf cycle, I got AF 6 days after still getting a bfp.

MissM I'm glad they are doing something, FX for bloods tomorrow!

Congrats Probably, that's great news! Keeping everything crossed for your sticky bean!

Marys is AF here yet?

1DPO. Yawn...

So, if I take the day of my ERPC as CD 1 (I know that might not be the case but it's a possible starting point right ?) then today I am on CD 23 (had a 45 day cycle average before pg). I have definite ewcm today so although we're not ttc til after this first cycle I think I might do some opk from tonight over the weekend just to see if I can get the hang of it and then that's one cycle of charting which means next month when we are trying I'll have more of a reference - does that sound right ? This is all going to be very new to me as we weren't properly trying before - just not being careful !

Good luck to all those hoping for a BFP this weekend.

Thanks Mamama and Red. Sorry for the outburst this morning. I had been feeling ok for the last couple of weeks but the realisation that yet another month is passing me by has been hard to accept.

Mamama I'm sorry you're feeling so anxious. I can relate to how you're feeling, it's like my confidence has taken a massive hit right now.

Red I'm no spring chicken 38 later this year. I agree that there is a huge pressure to fall pregnant soon after a mc. It's like I need it in order to feel properly healed.

"This is an entirely new pregnancy and bears no relation to the last. " I love this red, it's so true and we should remind ourselves of this.

Carrot, no AF yet but I can tell it's lurking and I'm far enough along for a bfn to be pretty final really.

Mary I'm 38 later this year too. Consultant told me not to wait too long before trying again and I now feel like I' walking round with a ticking clock above my head !!

Adventure, it's does feel like that doesn't it?!

Has anyone had their fertility checked? It's something I've considered doing.

I'm just presuming that as we got pregnant once we might be ok with doing it again but that's probably very naieve and with my long cycle and DP being out the country for work some weeks it will probably be tricky !!

Thank you for your good wishes - think it will be a loooooong 9 months.

I know it's hard it try not to be too disheartened about getting older and ttc - I'll be 41 in August!!

41, that's great! Just the sort of encouragement I need atm.

probably and missmrs congrats on your BFPs. missmrs glad things are OK, and fingers crossed for tomorrow. Quick question... did your GP give you the progesterone and run the tests?

Welcome mama and adventure - you'll find this a lovely place

marys I feel very woeful too - I'm 36 and it took 29 cycles to get the BFP, so v worried that it will be the same to the next one. We had fertility checks over the last year (including having my ovaries drilled as I have pcos!) so can answer any questions about process etc. We were discharged as the next step was IVF/ICSI and we need to pay privately. So this BFP felt like a miracle.

I do agree that there is a lot of pressure to get pregnant immediately after a mc. My parents and parents-in-law knew about our fertility issues, so there was no pressure to conceive - but now they keep saying that "it's happened once, so can happen again" and I kind of feel like they are expecting it soon. I also feel the same expectation from those who we have since told about the mc. I know it's probably all in my head!

A friend of mine conceived her first naturally at 42 and had an easy pregnancy.
'
ibeka I am keeping everything crossed for you. How cruel to have waited so long and then to mc. But at least you know you can and already have plans in place for ivf etc.

adventure no harm using opks this cycle in my opinion. They're useful toget an idea of when you ovulate, which should make the whole conception business easier next month!

Have a good weekend all xx

Sorry ibeka I think I misread your post. I thought I read somewhere that you had ivf in place for summertime but would hold off till September. Maybe I got that wrong. It's great that your parents haven't put the pressure on. It's the pressure we put on ourselves that's the problem...

Marys, thank you. Yes that is how it feels, like my confidence has been knocked and simple everyday things are difficult as I feel nervous and on edge. It is probably the fact that I've been in my bedroom grieving for almost 2 full weeks and today is the first day I've managed to go out on my own and do things. I'm glad I made myself do that, but just noticed that I was very anxious. It is early days as d&c was only wed, so maybe I should not try or expect too much too soon. Taking it easy for a while might be a better option.

I feel so safe when I'm with DH but when he goes to work I crumble. This is not me, I am so independent and usually the strong one. Just desperate for normality! I hope you are feeling better soon Marys, this is such a testing time for us all and seems the worry never ends....just shifts from one thing to the next but we will get stronger and cope better over time!

Hi red I think you're muddling me with kep as I've no IVF plans. just in my WTF cycle after MMC.

kep I totally agree with what red said - it is so cruel. You're parents are right of course, it can happen again, but them saying so is no help whatsoever! I'm sure they are just trying to be supportive but the problem with MC is that really, there is very little anyone can say that makes you feel better. Certainly I find the only place I feel I can get the comments I need are here, where everyone knows that. I hope you are having a lovely Friday evening at least.

Marys sorry you've been feeling rough today. It's crazy how it can spring on you out of nowhere when you think you've been having a good day.

mamama I have swung through so many emotions. My latest is a severe case of can't-be-arsed. With anything. I think you just have to ride the tide... I cried at everything when I first returned to 'normality' from my bedroom, felt like I could cope with nothing and just wanted to cling to DP. It will get better, I promise.

probably congratulations. I reiterate what others have said and what MrsDiddly said to me the other day. Every pregnancy is new - new lining, new embryo. Wishing you a very healthy 9 months indeed.

In 'me' news, I have had EWCM today with blood in it. This is normally a precursor to AF. So I think maybe I just haven't ovulated this WTF cycle.