We might be over 40 but we are young at heart, taking our supplements, shagging on time and waiting for the precious BFP!Over 40's TTC, join us here...

[Gumblossom]

Starting the new thread, Cloudjumper.

Anyone over 40, trying to conceive, whether it is your first or 6th (or more), we're facing the obstacles together.

I've been at it for 6 years now, but there are plenty of good news stories from these threads over the years.

Come and join us with your worries, woes,successes and milestones, we are here to support one another in our quest.

[jassS]

Maybe Moonstone you remember what was visible on Us/MRI? If there is lump somewhere in uterus, thats where adenomyosis in that case is. not like fibroid, inside uterus, but rather like something leaning against the wall of it? Then its not diffuse. Diffuse one can only be diagnosed with biopsia. Do you have heavy periods etc.?

[jassS]

Thanks for the suppot, ladies. Now boys in bed so crying in my bed. I looked at the picture and then put it away. I know I have it and its good, but i think I should try to not keep staring at it. I have the memory in my head anyway.
Yes I talked to DH and he was originally like maybe we should stop trying, it has already ruined our relationship for the last 4 years. But I told that I see progress - despite the horrible news this one was the first one to develop without beta decrease in week 5. When the mcs started, I always noticed the beta drom 12-14 dpo, then it moved to 20-21, and for this one there was no drop, maybe some stagnation. So first, if we had immune issues they are resolving and second, if this was not immune issue, mayb eit was just genetical issue? At our age this is a real possibility, ater alll.... So I guess I got him to the point of accepting to try again. it is the only thing which is supporting me - that we could try again

[ICallHimGerald]

Oh jass I really didn't want to open this in case it was bad news. You are pretty amazing, still giving support when you are going through this. Take care x

[fromwesttoeast]

So sorry Jass. It's such sad news. So hard.

[Fridgedooropen]

Jass really, really sorry. Give yourself time to cry. Glad that you are strong enough to see the positive in this time showing progress compared to others.

Welcome Moonstone and good luck!

[cloudjumper]

Jass, I'm so so sorry that it was bad news, my heart goes out to you. It is just so cruel, it never gets any easier hearing those awful words that there is no heartbeat. Sending big hugs your way xxx

[reni1]

Oh JassS how devastating, I am so sorry to read that. Wishing you much strength for tomorrow.

Welcome, Moonstone.

[ChewyGiraffe]

Jass - Same here - I'm so sad for you, I'd thought this seemed like the baby that would make it through to term ... As others have said, its quite remarkable you can at least recognise the positive progress here, in getting to 9 + 3 and with stronger betas than before. And good for you to be thinking about trying again.

Oh there is no nice way to say this, so I'm sorry, but I was wondering if you could ask to have cytogenetic testing on the foetus? Just in case it might help your future plans, e.g. if chromosomally normal maybe you could tweak your immune meds next time, I don't know. (Although its interesting you say your immune issues might be starting to resolve anyway, as I learnt from a consultation I had with a miscarriage consultant that immunes do fluctuate quite a bit.) I had genetic testing on the MMC I had last year and found the information helpful, and comforting to know the sex - a boy - so I think about 'him' (rather than 'baby') and still look at his scan photo from time to time, as I loved him from the start of course.

Extra for tomorrow.

[10000Fireflies]

Dear jass so sorry to hear what you and your DH are going through. Thinking of you.

[jassS]

I asked for genetic testing but was told it will not be done as it will not change the prognosis for next time. I know if I were in Estonia I would get it done, but I happen to be in Luxembourg. The healthcare here is frankly rubbish, even if my doc is really kind and caring - after all, he proposed a d&c within almost 12 hours of finding out. And he lets me have another uS check for the heartbeat. Even if I think that spotting and cramping is in reality enough of proof for me that the diagnosis is rhht. Up with bad cramps right now, still 4 hours before I can go to hospital....

[M00NST0NE]

jassS i went for an ultrasound in the beginning followed up by an MRI and was diagnosed with a fibroid, but after i was put under a GA to have the fibroid removed they realised it wasn't a fibroid after all and took a biopsy..i basically had a uterus the size of a child's football...after that it was all talk of hysterectomys which totally put me in a state of shock...

i have extremely heavy periods, so much so that i lose around a pint of blood each month and have to be on high doses of iron to try and keep my anaemia at bay...when AF is in town i'm basically under house arrest with all the furniture i sit or lie on covered in inco sheets...

Fridgedooropen and reni1... thank you...

[jassS]

Oh Moon, that is definitely then not the diffuse form of adeno, but a full-blown version. I understand it is still possible to get pg andcarry to term, but the agony of having a period must be so horrible!

Am in hospital, The worst part - tellng reception why I am here and the US, are behind me. The baby looked less like a baby today already, as my body has obviously decided not to bleed but reabsorb. That was in a way a relief, the poor thing is definitely gone and I feel the best I can do now is have this d&c. Going to theatre in 10 minutes. Lucky its Saturday, otherwise they force you here to call your insurance and ask for a guarantee letter before you are admitted. I do not think I could have done it this morning.

[M00NST0NE]

jassS

~sending you a hug to help you thru today~

periods are definitely not my favourite things that's for sure...but after suffering with them for so many years, you learn to live with the physical pain and the limitations they place on you...

i was placed on Esmya (ulipristal acetate) after my diagnosis in order to try and shrink down the effects of the adenomyosis, so after three months on that i had to wait a month and then start trying for a baby...we started trying last month and here i am now...with everything crossed...apart from my legs...obviously... (tmi!!)

[Grizzer]

Thinking of you Jass.
Welcome moonstone. Nothing is ever simple is it? Hope this is your month.
Gum my natural gynae man recommends dtd between days 10 & 17 because you can get pg up to 3 days after ov!! Not sure how that works but if it gives us more time then I'm choosing to believe it. I'm cd 11 & have managed to dtd cd 8 & 10 so doing quite well. Out for a boozy night with friends tonight though so my not drinking promise is forgotten for one night only.....
Any news yet Reni?
Waves to everyone else. Just on phone while dd is swimming so will catch up properly later.

[M00NST0NE]

thank you Grizzer ...

[reni1]

I'm out grizzer. AF arrived after all. Back to the start

[cloudjumper]

reni Bummer. New cycle, new luck... Hope you can console yourself with some ...

jass Hope it all went well, given the circumstances, and that you can get lots of rest and TLC. Look after yourself.

moon Welcome to the thread! May your stay here be short and sweet! I don't know anything about adenomyosis, but it sounds unpleasant! Fingers crossed you can get a break from having periods soon

10 DPO here, and no temp dip yet. Had a bit of a decrease a few days ago, but it's still well above coverline... Test day is Wednesday.
I had a couple of glasses of wine last night, completely forgot about the 2ww But after taking nearly 1.5h back home from work due to awful traffic, I soooo needed a drink! Going out for a friend's 40th tonight, so will try and reign it in... Sigh.

[M00NST0NE]

thank you cloudjumper...much appreciated...

[greenlizard]

Hi

For those who remember me (and have supported me!) on this thread over my personal journey to become a mother at the age of 45.

I gave birth on Sunday 15th March at 06:41 to a fabulous baby boy - weighing in at a healthy 9lb 4 (my eyes are still watering ). Absolutely the best of Mothers Day present ever!

xxx

[jassS]

Oh Green, that is just so fantastic news! And on Mothers' Day! Congratulations!

[10000Fireflies]

Green what a beauty!! Thanks for sharing a picture of him. He looks absolutely scrummy. Well done! Let us know if you need a babysitter.

JassS how are you recovering?

Will be back in a bit when I've read up on where you're all up to.

[jassS]

All done.My first experience on peridural, I have never had that in my life. Docs here find it hard to believe,as I have 4 dhildren. But they all were natural births.
Hoping to get home in an hour now... Mentally feeling much calmer now, ready to move on with life. I guess it eill come and go,this feeling of despair,so ready to deal with it.....

[10000Fireflies]

JassS so you had it done without a General? Recovery from an epidural should be much quicker. Really annoyed for you not getting genetic testing in Lux. So full of admiration for you though with the way you cope with all this. I'm sure the feeling of despair will lift. We've seen what a fighting attitude you have thanks to all your selfless and informative posts. I hope some help, and if I was anywhere near Lux I would be sending you plenty of to help with your recovery too.

Hi M00NST0NE and welcome. I don’t think I will ever complain of having heavy periods after what you have to go through. I don’t think I can better the advice you’ve received so far, so will just keep my fingers crossed for you and hope you’ll be back soon to report a BFP. Hope you’ll stick with us a while anyway. Have we been gentle enough?

Gum perhaps I should have a closer read of it myself then??!! I like the sound of the Prenenolone and Quercertin. I will look into those, though perhaps I haven’t given the IS enough of a try. Not sure how many supps I take at the moment…. A lot!!! Am also wondering whether Elle’s Super Elixir is worth a try? What do you think? ESE is supposed to make you less acidic…. Sperm doesn’t like acid environments…. Or am I clutching at straws??!! Er, no, Gum, you so totally haven’t given up TTC!

Cloud enjoy your night out! I’m sure a glass or two won’t hurt.

reni sorry to hear AF put in an appearance.

Grizzer have some s for Sterling Commitment to SWI!! And here’s to tonight . V interesting what your gynae recommends. I will be showing DH what he recommends WRT timings, as he pretty much excuses himself from DTD the minute we’ve have the static smiley. Not many s for that attitude!

I’m not sure how many DPO I am, but I think I could start using the IC HPTs soon. I mostly want to avoid that AF conciliatory boozing. I can’t help feeling it’s a crucial time for the egg to develop. Also, I would like DH to knock his naughty little habits on the head or only starting taking his supps a bit sooner than a couple of days before we need to start DTD.

Hi to Chewy, Frecklefacedgirls, ICallHimGerald, fromwesttoeast, Fridgedooropen, notsoold and DrDiva and anyone else who’s lurking!! I am off to have an exciting time tidying up for visitors while I can as DS is actually napping, having kept both of us up most of the night! I need to hide all the supps and OPKs if nothing else!!

[notsoold]

jass I am so sorry for your loss and for yo going through such a difficult thing. I admire you greatly for being level headed in such a difficult situation. Xxx

1000ff hi there! I am lurking indeed as with a long cycle everything takes forever. I started this cycle with reni and still have ages to go as I am dpo9...so everything is delayed..... hope you are well!

reni sorry you are out.... af is a cow isn't she?
gum and cloud hello there and to my pompom shaking buddy diege. Joe is also 17 months and a wonderful gift.

moon welcome and hope you stay is brief!

And off I go to walk the dog....

[jassS]

Thanks again for all support! As,almost no one in real life knows I even was pg, you are the only group of people apart from my DH who can support me. And he has not been great, I think he as men do was far more sure once I got past the first 7 weeks that all would be OK. So the shock is worse for him than me, also he has had to deal with a couple of lovely but lively beasts at home when I was in hospital in the morning. We told them I simply had to go to doctors and everyone here accepts this can take half a day in this country, so when zi got back threeish no wuestions were asked.

I managed to cook us a lovely dinner and still made that cake I had wanted to do yesterday in case it had been good news. I had all the ingredients and did not want them to go waste, also I really feel I want to pamper myself a bit and good home made food is something i really like to have. But my back hurts horribly where I had the injection done. Hope it gets better. Mentally am amazed how much better it felt immediately after the procedure, have not felt like crying since, even if I was still cryong huge tears when the operation started. Probably they gave me in the drip something which calmed me down. Am trying to organise my thoughts to get the work done I have not done yesterday really and need to have done before next Tuesday.