TTC and still breastfeeding? You're not alone! Thread# 2

[peardrop2]

Marking my place...hoping I won't be here for long

I always calculate the due date as I did think I'd have the option to avoid being pg/being in hospital at certain times if the year (I ideally wanted to avoid early September as DD would be starting nursery, and it was me who mentioned a while back on here taking a 2 month hiatus to avoid Christmas, and you all helped to convince me otherwise ) but you can try to plan life as best you can and it can still be unpredictable and bite you in the butt when you least expect it and as time is running out now (I feel) then I haven't got a month to waste. I will be ttc this month, which'll make the estimated due date 13th December. I'd hope dc would arrive 2 weeks early like DD though. I know this Christmas could be a bit of a crazy whirlwind/blur with a newborn and sleep deprivation, but how fantastic would Christmas 2016 be with a 1 year old and a 3 year old

Sorry to hear you may not have ovulated, Pear I was about to post how great DD is being still, with me not giving in to boob every time. She's even started asking for water half the time during the night instead of the boob I'm actually offering (as she's still bunged up) I thought I'd be sad when that happened, but I just felt more positive about being able to give her a sibling soon. I'm not so sure again now since you and DS have done so well to cut down to one feed and you still may not have ovulated (I really hope you have though!) it'd be a long time before DD and I would be able to cut down to one feed, or wean altogether (especially if she keeps getting these monthly colds )

Pear yes my dd was born in September and ds1 started nursery just after Christmas, a month before his 3rd birthday. It worked quite well as he was kind of used to the baby by then and hopefully didn't feel ousted.

Are you tempted at all to do away with the monitor and everything and just keep dtd?! I'm not sure which causes most stress, the knowing or the not knowing! Really hope you've laid an egg though

Morning all (and a belated welcome to Meggy!)
Sorry to hear you're feeling discouraged Pear. I have read quite a few people have got BFP despite never showing the peak result, just several highs, so there is still hope! It is stressful when you don't know if you are ovulating or not, especially when you are constantly DTD thinking something could be happening. I really hope you get lucky soon.

I've had a bad couple of days after a good start so am feeling a bit down too. DD is poorly so am feeding her more than usual and DH is having a bad week at work, so haven't been able to DTD the last couple of days. Will hopefully try tonight if DH is in the mood. I've had very slight achy, cramp-like feelings the last couple of days which I don't usually get, so I'm wondering if that was ovulation pain? If it was I may have missed the boat, but I don't usually ovulate this early, so who knows?

I don't know what to do about Christmas either. If I got pregnant this cycle (and had a regular cycle, which I don't think I do), my due date would have been 2nd Dec. I felt good knowing that I would def have had the baby by Christmas, whereas next cycle there would be the risk of the baby coming early and being in hospital over Christmas. I know DD wouldn't have a clue if we celebrated Christmas on a different day if we had to, but I know I would be disappointed to miss it. Having said that, my mum was in hospital on Christmas Day with my brother when I was three and I have no memory of her not being there or what we did, so at least I know DD will be none the wiser if it were to happen!

For everyone today, as no matter where you are in your cycle, it's all difficult and stressful and we all need to look after ourselves. I'm glad I have you guys to rant to when needed!

Hello everyone, sounds like everyone is having bit of a tough time on this thread! You all have my sympathies!

I have decided to Night wean. (Sob). For many reasons me and dh have decided we really need to get cracking and get some eggs going if we can. But I have a query. I'm cd22, pretty sure i haven't ovulated. When is a good time to start? Tonight? Might there still be time for an egg to pop out? Or earlier next cycle in the hope I produce an egg?! Any advice gratefully received!

On the plus side is Mother's Day this weekend. Still so happy to be a momma!! X

Giddy how long are your cycles usually?

Good luck dtd tonight duchess. So frustrating when dh is poorly but it's the right time! I'm sure my dh still thinks any time of the month is ok despite me telling him!

Giddy - I stopped when AF returned but I think anytime is the right time. If you stopped now and ovulated then you probably wouldn't have time to fertilise but hey...what have you got to loose. Sometimes it's best just to do it so that you don't waste time dwelling. It probably won't be as bad as you expect and you may be pleasantly surprised how easy Dc adapts like I was

Duchess - it is so tough when we have to work around DH work duties isn't it! Plus your Dc feeling ill and increasing the feeds. It always feels like it all comes at once and then your body tries to confuse you with early OV...Sod's law! Are you temping? I can't remember who is temping and who isn't.

Ispy - oh no. I have to know what the monitor says :-) As annoying as my monitor is (because it is giving me news I don't want to hear) I do believe there is truth in the results. I did actually degrade myself and fish out all 10 sticks from the bin today to compare lines lol There are two sticks with a darker second line but the line is thinner then the other days so maybe that is why it appears darker. I didn't really achieve anything with that exercise apart from showing what a nutter I am have become. That's good to know that you've experienced a good transition with ds1 starting nursery soon after dc2 arriving. Let's say I have Dc2 in February, my DS would start nursery after Easter so it would be similar timings, maybe a little shorter. My friend who's just had a baby has her 3 year old son in nursery 3 days and she says it is so helpful. I imagine it would help a lot with bf too.

Ava, that's wonderful that your DC is asking for water in the night and that you're positive about it. Well done you! Please don't think just because I'm potentially not OV on one feed it means you're the same. There are millions who fall pregnant whilst demand bf, it's just not me. So, fx that by doing what you've been doing you'll have the results you want too ??

Ava - oh I know ?? I was one of the ones saying don't stop for Christmas! Sorry! You're so right. A 1 year old and a 3 year old in Dec 2016 would be perfect. You know the silly thing is, I don't mind having a Christmas baby but I feel a bit sorry for the child who will always have to celebrate Christmas and their birthday together. I think I would have been bothered if that had been me, maybe?! but as my mum says I'm not getting any younger so I shouldn't waste time. I think I'll just see how I feel and what my body does in April before I drive myself round the bend ?? I would be expecting a new year baby anyway (if it arrived on time like dc1) and what better way to bring in 2016! New Year is always pants anyway ??

You know what's going to happen don't you?! We will see the duchess have her baby in April and think sod it lets have a baby ?? Oooo noooo you don't think the rest of the country will think that and fill up the ward do you? That's what happened at Jubilee time!

So, I had a very unusual lunch on my own with my mum today as I was able to leave a irritable teething boy with DH at home. She thought I was pregnant ?? It's because she spotted that unusually large spot volcano on my face this week, caused by the LH surge. Anyway, she thinks that I won't fall pregnant until I completely stop bf and claims that in her day this was the bible. I did point out that millions of women manage to fall pregnant whilst breastfeeding but I guess she was fed this information so it is what she believes. She also said that she had to stop bf to fall pregnant but I'm not 100% confident that is true because I have bf for longer then her (her longest was a year). Maybe she stopped bf to get AF back but then if she had waited who knows when AF would have returned anyway because my AF returned at 14 months! So, her knowledge has come a bit late because I had already decided that 2 years was my cut off point a while back and now I know the next stage is to stop the 7am feed. Exactly when ...I just don't know. Probably when AF arrives at the end of this month.

Thanks for getting back to me ladies. Mummy, was always roughly 29 days pre baby. Post baby I only have one full, measured cycle and that was 29 days too, but per cbfm I didn't peak so assume I didn't ovulate. 22 days in an my Mahoney has the same error reading as pear's - lots of highs no peaks again.

Pear, doing it can't be worse that the misery I am causing myself by fretting about it! I have had to go back to work three days a week and I love coming home after work and feeding him, but i know cuddles and stories will still be lovely, when he/we decide to wean fully. Any tips pear? Do I hide and let oh deal with him or do I be there but just offer him water/a cup of milk?! Thanks a million for your help.

My Mahoney?! My cbfm. :)

Giddy - I decided to be there for DS so that he knew mummy was still here for him. I did the usual bath, songs and then offered him a beaker of warm milk which he accepted because he didn't know what was coming next We then turned the lights off and had our usual cuddle except this time I told him it was sleepy time and he could have mummy's milk in the morning. He kicks his legs but I held him tight and said it was all OK and just walked around the room cuddling him. He then nestled down and accepted what was happening. I then put him down in his cot and it was fine. My advice is go with what your gut tells you to do and that will probably be the right thing for your son.

I think the morning feed will be a lot easier to drop as they can be distracted by tv and food well, I hope anyway!

Good advice pear. Thank you so much. Sorry for carrying on like a baby. :) xx

Giddy ~ hah ha I don't think you're a baby It took my son 2 days to get used to it but it took me 7 days until I stopped feeling sad and 14 days until I forgot about it

Evening everyone, welcome meggy

Busy thread! Just caught up. I'm so sorry that lots of us are having a tough time atm. We've had another bad day here. DD was awake and screaming at 5:30am, didn't nap well and had a bedtime meltdown too. She's going through a rough patch atm. Terrible twos! I felt wrecked at work today.

I've been feeling quite indifferent about having another dc. Probably because dd is being such a nightmare atm! Or it might be that I'm still a little early in the tww to get excited and hopeful obsessed I must still have some neurotic tendencies though as it crossed my mind that this month's indifference may mean I'll get a bfp! Sod's law, watched pot never boiling etc. I think I'm losing the plot

I'm feeling ready to fully wean dd too but the way she is at the moment it seems a long way off. Our situation is quite different from some in that we don't feed on demand, but dd feeds at set times: 1st thing, naptime (on my days off) and bedtime. We recently dropped the post nap feed but it's still hit and miss tbh. The problem with this is she expects it at these times and it's going to be hard to convince her otherwise. She's rather strong willed to say the least. Dh works shifts so it's not often possible for him to take over bedtime. What to do hey?!

Hi All, my thermometer arrived today and I promptly requested a return. I'll pop it back in the post tomorrow. Can't believe I thought it would be a special bbt thermometer I really am a ttc nutter. I'm going to use the one we already have. Any needless spending is essentially taking £ from our DC#2 baby fund

Pear, your new bedtime routine sounds so lovely, well done x

DD has settled down at a reasonable time again for the fourth night in a row, long may it continue! Hope it's not a blip due to the sniffles. I think something has just clicked for the both of us with our new routine. She enjoys picking out which three books to read and when we've read all three she allows me to turn off the light. No fuss I've bought myself a book light to keep reading (my books! not dds lol) after she's drifted off.

Gosh, just realised how old skool I sound on here - I don't use a phone to post (screen to small, too fiddly) and I don't want have a kindle... Anyway, I digress, I think the timing of all this fits in really well with the no longer feeding on demand, and more structure to our routine.

This is the fifth day of AF and I think she'll still be here tomorrow, so it's just like it was before I fell pg this cycle Really hope my body's properly gearing up for a bfp now! Fx!

Sorry Mary, was writing my post while you were posting and only just saw yours.

No worries ava. Fx your great routine sticks. You too pear.

To be fair, dd is usually pretty good at bedtime and overnight. I seem to forget this too quickly when we hit a difficult patch.

Was the thermometer not accurate enough? I'm a bit clueless about them.

You're kind pear. :)

Another, Urm, determined little one here Mary's, you're not alone!

They're hard work aren't they giddy?! She very contrary atm. Her favourite phrase is "no way".

I love seeing how much of a little personality he is getting, but there are downsides! Apparently he was "testing the boundaries" at nursery, getting up from table at meal times and grinning cheekily and running off when being told to sit back down. I've trained him all wrong! :)

?? at 'no way' Mary! Also at Pear going through the bin! At least we're all crazy together!

We've had a couple of bad nights too, I wonder what's up with all these little ones atm. Definitely makes me think how tricky another baby would be....On the upside though, my ds had his bedtime feed but then DH put him to bed tonight! This is rather a miracle as I usually feed him to sleep in our bed.

I have been still am tempted to chuck money at this ttc problem, ie, invest in the cbfm even private blood tests but I think I've realised it won't help AF come back any quicker ??

Pear & Ava your bedtime routines both sound lovely

Ava what are your new stats?

Night all- hope you all have good nights

Cd20 and I've got my 8th high on the CBFM this morning. My conclusion is: a) after dropping the night feed my body tried to ovulate early but hasn't succeeded yet. B) my body tried to ovulate early but didn't succeed this month but as my body didn't OV until cd24 last month my monitor is confused and wants to see what happens.

A or B I am seriously struggling to continue the EOD mission. DS is still poorly (going to take him to a doctor this morning) and DH and I are exhausted from broken sleep. Dh left for work at 4am this morning, I cannot imagine how we will manage DTD tonight