The 37th Just Shaggers are on their way! Watch out for accidental erections and bruising injections, polish your perfect ovaries, we're climbing a mountain and digging deeply to get our BFPs!

[honeysucklejasmine]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied and adapted from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others. Also know as 'the witch', 'bitch witch' and 'that one with the red shiny convertible'

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in! PONF = Pee on Nigel Farage. Self explanatory, who wouldn't?

ROC - Receptacle of Choice - what one chooses to use for the task of POAS. Option decorations include photographs of political leaders.

JIAC = Jizz in a Cup. Preferable to jizz on the carpet or jizz in the eye. This one's for the lucky men in our lives.

Shagging like <strong>something</strong> = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession. Warning - this may happen to you if you start trying to POAS at 5dpo. PUT. THE. PISSY. STICK. DOWN. IT'S TOO EARLY!

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture. AKA Schroedingering!
TWPU - Two Week Piss Up!

Keeping your gingers = fingers crossed, yet another autocorrect development! Shortened to 'gx'

Doing A lemon = Testing WAAAAAAAY to early!

The link to Part 36 is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2263704-O-Come-all-ye-Viroids-joyful-and-triumphant-Deck-the-halls-with-Contraband-All-I-want-for-Christmas-is-a-BFP-Just-Shag-all-the-way-no36" target="_blank">here</a>

The current Grads Fred is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/a2272951-The-JS-Grads-turn-19-Were-cooking-and-popping-out-our-JSing-babies-with-style-co-ordinated-changing-bags-and-a-healthy-dose-of-humour" target="_blank">here</a>

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/health-news/the-dark-side-of-mumsnet-my-shocking-tour-of-the-websites-nether-regions-8905055.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">here</a>

We are the dark side of MN. Welcome

rhi I have a vision of your dh not getting the message and you falling asleep in the cupboard.

yy to the horniness, although for me it happens about 24hours before AF...my body's last hurrah before ERTD. No sex ban during AF as such, but now we're JSing I often think there's little point bothering during AF particularly as I have to get up to fetch a towel to lie on

Do you viroids also find that sex also leads to more sex? And that less sex (or a bit of a drought) also leads to less sex? Sometimes it's hard to break the pattern.

Naked remember austra hahaha

yeah it's very easy to get into that pattern lemon, shagging EoD has made us expect is every other day. But when we went through a dry patch going to bed and going to sleep felt the most natural thing to do.

Sex aaa-aalways leads to more sex.
Am too down to have sex. Nothing is happening in the AF department even though I've cut down my bfeeding from 24/7 on demand (a lot of demand!) to almost nothing twice a day only. It's been about a month already, and now I just want to sulk. Maybe a bit of nookie will engage the follicles?

Must try harder!

austra it is quite possible, but there is no cupboard, just a mountain of toys so if I fall asleep I will no doubt wake up with multiple piercings in sensitive places and horrific bruising. I'm living on the edge guys, seriously .

Sex during AF's visits are a major no, dp used to nag for a go (the sick freak) but has since learned not to bother. We've probably dtd before the end a couple of times, but never with anything significant going on.

Missed a few posts there, didn't mean to ignore your last one austra. I didn't start back with AF until I was bfing almost nothing once a day, after over 2 years of no AF at all due to pregnancy and I BFd til dd was over 2 years old. It won't be much longer, so by all means indulge in your sulk and then come back fighting .

Haha just read lemons post as shakes beaver!

Yy to horniness during AF.....one of lifes cruel tricks. Def no go for me although dp regularly asks (sicko)

Well what i thought was early AF has stopped so I'm tentatively hoping that it was ib

Fx for you just

is AF due now then? If so, any plans to POAS?

Just when are you due AF?

So I caved and POAS this AM even though FF says I am only 11DPO. Clearly it was BFN.
I am trying not to symptom spot but have pink tinged CM and major constipation (TMI) Vivid dreams and peed 9 times this morning between 7am and 1pm ...not that I was counting of course!
Now think AF is on her way, so trying to dream up creative ways to get the DH to perform next month without putting him under pressure
How is everyone else doing?

Due friday so prob no point poas yet. Symptom spotting gone into overdrive but fairly sure im imagining them/always feel like this week before AF! Wish i had paid more attention to pre af symptons so could compare.
Only thing i can truly say is different is tea tastes funny but suspect that's because of change of brand! I need a slap!

just and hade hooyah to you both. No POAS until you are 14DPO you know the rules!

I may shake my beaver at DH when he gets home, just

Will let you know if he responds to my siren call

Beaver shaking could be new strip tease....may try it myself. There you go rhi a sex idea for you!

I am going for EOD this month. Going well so far.

Beaver shaking sounds like a Miley Cyrus dance move!

Just I'm due Thurs/Fri but may wait til Sat if no show. Have a big thing at work Fri morning and don't want to be distracted by the either excitement or disappointment. Don't mind AF so much but reckon seeing a bfn will feel like an actual rejection rather than just my body ticking over for another cycle.

my friend gave me a good idea - naked house. you're named when dh gets home, and you've text him saying come home quick there's a problem. when he gets there you tell him problem is your clothes fall off when you get in the house.

Haha, thanks guys, that's exactly the sort of thing I had in mind. I am practising as I type, probably not my most impressive talent but there are hours until he gets home to find me under the stairs, cape and mask on and with only the sound of a toy mountain vibrating with the force of my shaking beaver to be heard. This, folks, is how I was born to be.

I say we all have go at shaking our beavers and compare notes in the morning.

Oh and I always thought the AF induced horniness is down to the fact I tend to want stuff I can't have and that it was a psychological thing

muddy I am being observed friday (teacher) so should also wait, know what you mean, bfn seems more brutal than AF. Bet i can't though, I have notoriously weak will power.

lil love naked house!

lil you've just sorted my Wednesday night. Cheers! haha

rhi actually just snorted, brilliant mental picture

Pickle I don't have much advice for increasing your DH's libido apart from the usual (underwear, sexy snogs etc) but can let you know that you are not the only one. One of my pals is in the same situation and is considering leaving her DH over it . They are otherwise pretty happy but have not been intimate for years and he won't talk about it / go to counselling.

My DH has always been a right randy fecker had a high libido as have previous DPs, but I go for active types so they all have/had plenty of testosterone. Does your DH do much exercise? Might help?

I have previously enjoyed a shag as much as the next Viroid but not on a hugely regular basis.... and then I came off the pill, HELLO!! Feel like I'm 17 again! (Also always mega randy when on AF, WTF is that all about?!) Still waiting for AF to feck orf so we can actually start ttc! So there may be a reason behind your DH'S low libido, maybe a trip to the GP?