ttc after mc- the best shit place to be! #3

[northdownmummy]

looking forward to new beginnings in the new year

no back ache just feel 'full up' like I said I've had twinges all day and can't get comfy tonight. no matter which way I sit I can't seems to give my uterus enough room? but I don't know if that's because in my head I'm conscious I might have a sticky bean?

Fwiw it's worth ginger, when I was early pregnant with my dd, I had loads of stretchy cramps (in fact I willed them because I thought it meant it was implanting! I had no concept of mc then) but I remember bring hit with the worst pain that actually made me curl up on bathroom floor and I remember thinking it was over. But I had a successful pregnancy and she's snoring in room next door now

I had absoloutly no warning pains before I actually mc! so it goes to show it's all such guesswork and so different for everyone. Try not to over think or over analyse it xxx

Feeling (irrationally) low today. Had neg opk so ovulation definitely over. I realise I'm on the home run to the cycle we can properly ttc in now but I felt so well this cycle that I feel sad we couldn't try and now the eggy is gone.

Ok. I sound ridiculous and I make no sense

thank you chasing that helps me. its silly what we worry about.

definitely no chance of bfp? i do wonder sometimes if its best to have a few months to let ur body get over it.

mrse i av logged on especially to see ur results this morning

chasing you are almost there!! The last egg wasn't meant to be, and you'll be able to do everything you can for the next one. And you will be in tip top form next cycle. Hope you feel better later in the day

Ginger I was treated with methotrexate so we were banned from conceiving for 3 months. Xx

Hello

Can I join in? Af is here at the moment but have decided I'm ready to try again when she's buggered off.

Stats: one healthy 23 month old dd
One mmc, 5 first trimester mc's, one later pregnancy loss (Alex for those who may remember me)

Ready to join the fray again and throw baby dust at people with reckless abandon!

ginger bread I'm out buying tests this second!!

Welcome sliced what a rough ride you've had. Sorry you find yourself here but hooray for ttc :-D

Thank you!

I must admit now that we are ready to try again I'm getting a really odd feeling. Excitement and terror, a bit like being told you are going to Disney land but one of the rides might chop your head off.

Busily reading the thread so I can catch up.

Sliced that is the perfect analogy haha. And they won't tell you which ride either!

hi sliced sorry you find yourself here but welcome!! good luck getting your stick bean this year!

exciting mrse. i might not get any work done this morning checking for bfp news.

oh chasing i should have read the threas it just moves so fast. so after this af are you at the point where u are able to ttc? least it is nearly here and plenty of people get bfps first cycle you never know your luck.

sliding great to see you ttc again, im so sorry for everything you have been through before getting here. that is a very good description!

i wouldnt mind a bit of baby dust over here

Hi all.

Well today is the day. My first due date has finally arrived

I really thought I'd be pregnant again by this date - and I have been since, twice more !!! Still can't believe I've lost 3 babies and that I'm not pregnant by my due date.

I'm still signed off work until Thursday - I told the GP there was absolutely no way on this earth I could be in work facing my 18 week pregnant colleague who sits opposite me knowing I should be having a baby today.

Dreading going back to work. How do I face her?

So anyway currently hiding away in bed but am going clothes shopping and to acupuncture today.

Stocking I am do sorry - that's crap

Treacle so glad you are doing ok. Keep brave!! Little Treacle is growing away.

Sliced and other newbies - so sorry for your losses. These ladies are amazing and will keep you sane

Thinking of you brummie

Ok, I think I'm caught up now

Thank you, I was quite proud of that analogy. I'm usually quite shit at putting my finger on emotions.

Brummie that must be very hard. All I can say is it may get easier. Earlier this year I would even cross the road and not look if I saw a pregnant woman coming towards me. The way I cope with it now is just to think 'How lovely for them' and then try to distract myself. But then I didn't have to work with any pregnant ladies, so sorry I have no useful advice!

Due dates are a complete bitch aren't they?

oh brummie what a hard day for you. sounds like u have a nice day of distractions planned though.

my due date is not until june so im not sure how i will feel i am hoping i can play on the 'at least im not in labour' card or like u that i am pregnant again and looking forward to a new due date but who knows.

you sound like youve had such a hard time. i hope u get a new and successful due date sometime soon.

meant to add at my work there are two lovely ladies due within weeks of when i was it is hard seeing them but in a way i am just glad they havent had to go through what i did and hopefully as our due dates approach i can take some comfort in the fact at least they will have a healthy baby in their arms. this could all change it still feels like early days for me.

Oh brummie love. :-( I'm glad the gp signed you off so you can spend this day as you wish. Re the colleague. It's difficult. Right now I can face SIL because I'm convincing myself that I'll be pregnant very soon and it'll be okay. But if I'm not I know I'm going to find this really hard. I don't know how to advise you.. I think we are all just muddling along each day doing what we can to pull ourselves through the rubbish days. Hopefully it'll get easier with her and she will be sensitive to your situation. Are you able to move departments/role .. generally get away from her? That's a short term solution, but ultimately there will always be pregnant women and it's a good idea to work towards getting to a place where it doesn't affect you in the same way. I used to spot a pregnant women.. inwardly panic about how to hold it together. .end up side glancing her bump and avoiding eye contact etc. Now I can see newborns and pregnant women and think "it'll be me soon" ..and think about how lovely they are feeling and how amazing it'll be when that's me...... but if I were to mc again I would imagine it would be much harder. I guess I'm luring myself into a faux security and positive mindset to protect myself right now.

Ginger yes I'm 10 weeks post methotrexate now, so it'll be about 3.5 months by the time I ov in 27 days time.

Oh god. Please let it happen.

Thanks all. Unfortunately changing role isn't an option. We are both client facing and do the same job. So we work on exact same things together but with different clients. But when she's on hols I cover her and vice versa. She already had 1 dc so I cover her on her day off already.

That's means when she has mw appt's I will know because I'll be covering her.

So no escape - in my face every single day. I know I just need to suck it up and it'll be on me to suck it up but you literally couldn't make it up.

Is it too early for

It's never to early to do whatever the hell you want on a day like this.

Well I'm starting my day with runny eggs and toast and will have coffee and cake later. And most definitely a drink tonight.

Oh and spending a shitload on clothes later with acupuncture afterwards

We've been quite good re money recently due to buying a house. Plus because I was pregnant I didn't want to buy clothes that wouldn't fit.

Yep that ship has not only sailed , it's currently in Australia it's so far sailed.

Clothes shopping today!!!

get stretchy stuff just incase brummie or in fact get expensive non stretch stuff and jinx yourself

i missed egg n soldiers so much when pregnant even though i hardly ever eat them when not. make the most of those runny eggs!

Baby bomb at work, and difficult meeting with manager to come. Need to gather my strength