On The 12th Day of Xmas My Viroids Gave To Me 12 OPKs 11 New Positions 10 Symptom Spots 9 Pics Of Cats 8 TMI's 7 Shag Stories 6 Cervix Positions 5 Temp Charts 4 Hooyas 3 DPO 2 Gx and an Xmas BFP!JS 35

[jellypi3]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied and adapted from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others. Also know as 'the witch', 'bitch witch' and 'that one with the red shiny convertible'

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in! PONF = Pee on Nigel Farage. Self explanatory, who wouldn't?

ROC - Receptacle of Choice - what one chooses to use for the task of POAS. Option decorations include photographs of political leaders.

JIAC = Jizz in a Cup. Preferable to jizz on the carpet or jizz in the eye. This one's for the lucky men in our lives.

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession. Warning - this may happen to you if you start trying to POAS at 5dpo. PUT. THE. PISSY. STICK. DOWN. IT'S TOO EARLY!

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture. AKA Schroedinging!
TWPU - Two Week Piss Up!

Keeping your gingers = fingers crossed, yet another autocorrect development! Shortened to 'gx'

Doing A lemon = Testing WAAAAAAAY to early!

The link to Part 33 is here

The current Grads Fred is here

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is here. We are the dark side of MN. Welcome.

Happy Christmas shagging, shaggers!

What a meal jelly! It's our Christmas meal tomorrow so hopefully something equally lovely!

Glad scan showed no issues bother. All shit but at least you can get on with recovery.

Are we still due some testing tomorrow and Friday??

bumble I'm glad they are looking into it for you now and not putting you off until 1 or 2 year mark. if next test comes back annovulatory start pushing for referral. they may insist on doing Another blood test next cycle but after that they should definitely refer you and there's no harm in asking to be referred whilst waiting to do next test. fx you have a good gp like I did who doesn't quibble and just does it. its shit but yes it's progress, and if your not ovulating they can give you clomid to try and get you ovulating so all is not lost. get dh booked in for an sa too.

and yes injections are for ivf. I never thought I'd ever look forward to an injection so much!

jelly that is a LOT of food!

jelly I think I've worked out you can find my page here and then request from there

poochie your link doesn't work

ohhhhh :-( poop!

fertilityfriend.com/ticker/53d747/ttc.png

does this one work?

bumble I'm also in the midst of an anovulatory cycle. Which is fine because I'm banned from ttc for a bit. Main signs of icing without the use of contraband are ewcm and hurty boobs after your fertile week, if you get this sort of thing most cycles then you're probably icing most cycles. If not, as lil says there are lots of things to try. Also bear in mind that bloods are a snapshot of one day in your cycle, there is nothing to say you didn't ice a few days later. Definitely follow lils advice and be pushy, knowledge is power!

no this is your link poochie, I managed to cobble it together from what u posted. last one u sent was just ur ticker picture! I've added u but u will gave to accept me

no this is your link poochie, I managed to cobble it together from what u posted. last one u sent was just ur ticker picture!

stupid app. what do u guys see as my name on ff app?

thanks lil! I'm a pleb! and you come up as lildottie

thanks lil and tink - and yeah, I nearly always have mid cycle cramps, sore boobs etc so think my body is usually doing something!

And yes, I will be pushy - doctor sounded like he would be helpful so hoping that we'll get a referral soon. DH is doing the sa test on tues.

To answer someone's question way back about good tv, we watch loads... favourites are Game of Thrones, orange is the new black, hannibal, house of cards, and we're watching orphan black at the mo, which is surprisingly addictive!

Evening. Poochie I added you too.

Think I'll be out by morning. Small amount of brown on wiping yes I got the right hole! so we'll see. That puts me on a 25 day cycle. Should ice again on NYE!

Evening shaggers

You lot are inspirational, you've just inspired me to don the cape (without removing my nightie) and wake DH up for a shag! Think he was a little surprised, but quite compliant.

Sorry I've only been lurking for a while, JSing was dangerously close to turning into TTC and was taking up faaaaar too much of my headspace. However, today is CD13 so I'm back to it! Last cycle was 35 days and I'm sure I iced on CD15, so think I have quite a long luteal phase?

How is everyone? Missed you guys!

I have 2 of you who haven't set usernames, think its honey and jelly? you need to go to the more tab in friends area then do community setup and set a public nickname. for my sanity please do it!

I have just skim read the days worth of posts - feeling pretty tired all of a sudden, so it's time for a quick reply before bed...

bat I'm going through a too much to do, too little time crisis myself, but bumble I am a list writer too! I am going to write a list of the things I have left to do, but I did make a bit of a dent in the list today - though that did mean I didn't leave school until half 8... :-S Hoping this means I can leave far earlier tomorrow.

I need to go shopping tomorrow evening. I need to buy a secret santa present. I'm thinking a scarf - not a wooly winter one, an accessory type one, if you know what I mean. We only have a small budget though, so not sure if will be able to get one... I shouldn't have left it til last minute... Oops.

In other news I have a date for my ultrasound scan to check my ovaries - 7th Jan.

I've also now hit the losing 1 stone mark from my highest ever weight. Got to keep going. .

Spotting got heavier. Think it's the witch

Sorry lovelies will catch up later. Not in the best of moods

sorry purple

ain congrats on the weight loss, that's brilliant! I've been really bad with food this week. must do better tomorrow!

Oh no purple :( hugs hun.

Think I'm out this month too. Never mind, always next month! Little bit disappointed because we put a lot of effort in this month but oh well.

Oh lil I changed my name and have added pooch :)

Morning. My temp has gone below the cover line and more spotting, so I think I am out for this year!

I was out for a Christmas meal last week and afterwards one of the staff pulled me aside and it turns out he was a guy who I used to see at Slimming World with his wife. We had a chat and a catch up and he said that his wife had got pregnant almost instantly after losing a few stone. They have a four year old now.

I also saw my BIL yesterday who seems to be vanishing before my eyes. He's cut his sugar in his tea (from about 3tbs to 2tsp in those huge sports direct mugs) and is working out for about four days a week. Soon he'll be as skinny as my stick of a husband. In short, it's a time for me to do something about it!

I lost 3 stone on slimming world before but then my bro broke his neck and I spent over a year back and forth to hospitals, grabbing sandwiches and takeaways late at night, and on it all went again. I have a bit of an emotional relationship with food and I need to break that.

Now, I am going to a works do tonight - takeaway at the bosses house, so i am going to try and be good and not have huge amounts of creamy sauce, and I am going to eat SW stylee every other day except christmas day. (Can't think how bad pigs in blankets are for you, they're lush!) And we'll see how o do by new year. I think I need to remind myself how easy it was to lose weight on sw, then I will get back in to it again.

Then hopefully as I get smaller I can build up exercise without hurting myself, and then hopefully get upduffed.

That is my plan!

(In the meanwhile I a!m going to hide in bed and take painkillers. I love endometriosis)

Orphan black is fab honey! Good choice! GX for NYE baby!

Sorry about the witch purple and jelly. Hopefully the Christmas foods can help comfort you.

Great news on the weight loss ain, keep going! It's easier once you start to see the progress!

Yep it's the witch.

Oh well I'm not having a dry Christmas now. Could have had that mulled wine on Saturday

I don't understand what happened. I wasn't imagining those symptoms. They've all gone this morning.

I don't know what to make of it all. Why else would I have nausea in the mornings, constipation, irritability, strong smells, headaches and migraine all at the same time. I know these things can have other causes but they are all unusual to me.

I have IBS, the only time I get constipation is when I'm pregnant. The last time I had a migraine I was pregnant. The smells haven't bothered me since last time I was.

Struggling to rationalise it all. Safe to say I'm gutted!