ttc after mc- the best shit place to be! #2

[chasingtherainbow]

Roll up roll up... onto a new thread. Keep those lucky bfp' s coming and unmumsnetty hugs all round.

Marking my place.

Fantastic news brummie x

How are you cake? Was thinking about you lots this week and hoping you were still getting comfort from loved ones xx

Envious that us beautiful!

I've just started passing tissuey stuff.

Huge congratulations Brummie - such awesome news (and just in time for your house move!) Keeping everything crossed that you have a healthy, sticky bean and a very boring and uneventful 8 months.

I don't blame you at all for not wanting to leave this thread. I was absolutely petrified after my second BFP and know I will be even more of a nervous wreck next time round. Here's hoping your house move and Christmas prove to be welcome distractions.

I phoned the hospital and they said it was just policy based on saving resources for pregnancies which had progressed further.

I called BUPA and I'm covered for surgical so I think I'll book it in for the end of this week and then just cancel if it happens naturally.

Can't see how it could be riskier when the surgery is used to remove any tiny amounts left if miscarriage is incomplete. It must be fine for tiny amounts. I understand though- my pregnancy hasn't progressed past 6 weeks (although I would currently be 11 weeks). Understand that the NHS would need the surgery spots for someone losing an 11 week pregnancy as presumably that can be more physically traumatic.

Feel better with a deadline in mind as it really doesn't feel like my body is going to work it out.

Does anyone have erpc experiences that they wouldn't mind sharing? I've never had any kind of surgery so I'm scared.

guy I'm sorry you're going through this. I had an erpc in February, and the op itself was fine, I was home a couple of hours later and didn't really have much pain or bleeding afterwards and was very relieved that it was all over.

However, just make sure you're aware of all the risk involved. I've just been diagnosed with Asherman's syndrome, which is basically adhesions in the uterus as a result of surgery and it can impact your fertility. I don't mean to scare you as it is rare, but no one mentioned this to me at all at the time, and I might have chosen a different route if I'd known about it. Good luck with whatever you decide.

guy I had an erpc in August after my baby died at 8.5w. I found out right beforehand at 8w that it wasn't going to make it (via private scan) as the HB was very very slow. Once the MC was confirmed a week later, the hospital (UCH in London) recommended ERPC as they didn't know how long it would take to pass naturally (it could have been up to 6 weeks).
I got to the hospital 3pm for the evening list. At 4pm I had to insert a couple of tablets to soften the cervix. At 5ish I went to pre-op and went immediately under, pretty much. I was lucky, there was a girl after me who had to wait in pre-op (our husbands were not allowed to wait there) for me to be finished. So I was put under general at about 5.30 and woke up about 6.30. I was given tea, water and biscuits for about another 1.5 hours while they checked I had recovered from surgery ok (my husband was with me by then). Left to go home about 8pm.
So it's pretty fast. I found the parts where I had to insert the pills upsetting, and couldn't stop crying as they put me under, I was still freaking out, but I felt a lot better once it was done. I didn't bleed much after, but there was a bit of blood when I went to the loo for the next day or so. 2nd what metal said...there's a lot of relief afterwards as I felt that I could begin the healing process. The idea that the baby was still inside me after the mc was very difficult to deal with - I couldn't possibly have waited for it to happen naturally, especially after losing another baby naturally earlier in the year (measuring 5.4). I wasn't offered medical management, only waiting or surgery so it was an easy choice for me.
I still had some pregnancy symptoms for a few days afterwards and tested negative a couple of weeks later, although I wasn't testing regularly. My wtf cycle was normal, 30 days, then it went a bit weird - 13 days, then 28 days, but the next cycle I got pregnant again (I'm 4w5d today) so I obviously recovered pretty quickly.
Sorry that's a bit of a novel but I hope it helps, it's as comprehensive as possible!

guy I had Erpc on August - had to be there 7am (Saturday surgery as it was bank Hol), various bloods, checks and talks then off to surgery around noon. General anaesthetic, woke up about 45 mins later. I freaked out about needing DH there so they took me out of recovery really quickly. I was pretty woozy for a few hours and they didn't let me home until I had wee-ed twice, bleeding slowed and was less wobbly but still got home that night. Other ladies bounced back quicker and were home within hours.

Afterwards I was fairly wiped out but bleeding was less than I expected and very little pain. Having now compared natural with op I prefer op.

Hope that helps!

Oh Guy you must be so scared.

The ERPC actually was really ok - as much as it can be I guess. I was adamant I was having it. Got taken down to theatre about 2.45. A nurse inserted some pessaries vaginally about an hour before to soften the cervix ( which can raise your temp slightly and make you feel a bit hot) however the damned things didn't work!!
Anyway, got down to theatre - anaesthetic through cannula and next thing I knew it was 3.30pm and I was in recovery. My throat actually hurt more than anything else from the tube.

4pm I was back in my room and with DP. Had tea and toast and probably went home about 6pm.

That was it. I found it way less traumatic than my natural one.

After that the bleeding and pain stopped really quickly. You will be ok and I found the ERPC way better.

Big hugs xx

Thanks all for lovely messages - we are both v apprehensive..

And Cariad it's great for house move, new start. I've lost two babies in this flat and I've no real desire to return to Women's Hospital

Thank you so much for sharing your stories.
So sorry to hog the thread when there has been such happy news brummie!

Guy just to say that my ERPC experience was as quick and painless as others report above. I didn't have any pessaries beforehand though. I felt very heavy around my uterus for a couple of days afterwards, but nothing paracetamol and ibuprofen couldn't cope with. Definitely a few days bed rest recommended. Bleeding was moderate then lightened after 24 hours, but I did have a big bleed a week later. Luckily I knew it was coming as I'd had a scan at the EPU 6 days after the op due to a weird acute pain in my side, which turned out to be nothing to do with my uterus probably severe constipation after the painkillers, but it did show lots and lots of clots in there, so I knew they would have to pass. The bleed started 24 hours later while I was coming home from work and I had to hobble home with my legs clamped tight to stop myself completely flooding. I passed some big clots over the next hour, and then nothing more. I mention it just because I would have been terrified if I hadn't have had the scan and known there was more to come, as I hadn't bled at all for a couple of days beforehand. So keep a stock of thick pads for several days afterwards, just in case. And I recommend an iron supplement or pregnancy supplement with iron for a few weeks afterwards, as you do feel wiped out (as with all MCs) and your body needs to recover. Sending you hugs xx

And massive congrats Brummie! I really hope this is a sticky, healthy bean for you

Reading all your posts I'm so glad I had a natural , complete miscarriage. You're all such stomg brave women and my heart goes out to you all

I'm now 6dpo and my bbs are killing me! They normally get a little bit tender during ovulation then the tenderness returns about 2 days before my period... So I'm hoping the fact they've continued to be tender and are now very tender is a good thing and not another f*ed up thing my body is doing to screw with my mind!

*strong (sorry very tired but CANNOT sleep)

I feel the same daisy. At the time it was shit but I was so glad to have had a naturally miscarriage and by the time I had my scan nearly everything had gone.
You are all so strong x

Oh my goodness Guy please don't think that! This thread is exactly that. A place to get comfort, support and ask every question you need to.

This thread has been here for me twice and all times in between.

I found with my ERPC once it was over, literally everything stopped. The bleeding and pain. Any niggles I had nurofen was absolutely enough.

I sobbed to DP that I couldn't ever go through this again and here we are. I don't want to sound ungrateful - but I've been here before. Twice!!!!!

DP is v quiet about it all - he says he can't even think about it in case it goes wrong.

But as Charlie said very well, can't stop anything happening so will try to enjoy

So I've wooden up this morning with some bleeding. It's not much, but it is pink. Still no pain. Does that mean this might be happening soon? Or could it still be ages away? Should I stay off work tomorrow? Should I still book myself in for an erpc or wait and see what happens?
Sorry- I know there aren't really any right answers here.

*woken

If you've started bleeding I think it's likely to happen today. I wouldn't make any decision until this afternoon. Rest up and see what happens. For me, once the bleeding started, I passed the clots and baby within a few hours. The pain was pretty bad until I passed the baby but the baby was 9+1 weeks in size. If you do miscarry today, don't go into work tomorrow. You'll be tired, weak and emotional and it's really important to rest. The hospital gave me a 2 week sick note as that's what they recommend as recovery time. Hand holding incase it is happening today xx