The home of sporn lovers and cunthawks; make sure the ewcm is coming from the right hole and don your capes (but don't put parsley up your chuff!) ... for JUST SHAGGING Part 33

[mountaingirl01]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied and adapted from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others. Also know as 'the witch', 'bitch witch' and 'that one with the red shiny convertible'

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in! PONF = Pee on Nigel Farage. Self explanatory, who wouldn't? 

ROC - Receptacle of Choice - what one chooses to use for the task of POAS. Option decorations include photographs of political leaders.

JIAC = Jizz in a Cup. Preferable to jizz on the carpet or jizz in the eye. This one's for the lucky men in our lives.

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession. Warning - this may happen to you if you start trying to POAS at 5dpo. PUT. THE. PISSY. STICK. DOWN. IT'S TOO EARLY!

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture. AKA Schroedinging!
TWPU - Two Week Piss Up!

Keeping your gingers = fingers crossed, yet another autocorrect development! Shortened to 'gx'

The link to Part 31 is here

The current Grads Fred is here

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is here. We are the dark side of MN. Welcome.

Happy shagging, shaggers!

This is good, it shows you actual footage of a baby developing in the womb!

I went with my healthy spinach lasagne. have hit 40% carbs, 24% protein in my quest for 25% protein so not bad. certainly better than dominos!

am drinking! promise!

Oh Before that's fantastic news. You must be so relieved

Lil BC sounds like hell but it's a means to an end. Well done on the spinach lasagne too. It's hard to not phone a takeaway when you're not feeling great

purple what's the latest? Are you on track still to get your cape on for the new year?

jcandy if it helps I still have no symptoms and I hit the 6 week mark tomorrow :)

Omg mountain that's gone so quick!! Half way to 12

Thanks Jelly And I really hope everything is okay. . I know it's not really a consolation in any way, but if worst fears are confirmed more and more people are beating it every day. My grandad beat cancer a couple years back and he is still as active as ever. And hopefully the weightloss could be for another reason - like the gall bladder being removed. We're here if you want to rant anytime. xXx

That CM link is a little gross, but very clear.

And that video is fascinating, though a little scary. 5 out of 6???

Thanks Mountain I'm not very confident this month as I've been very stressed but still planning to POAS (so you'll get your fix tink) DP are going away for a couple of nights so I want to know if I can have lots of wine or not

GX candy you never know!

Wow Mountain already?! Yay! No sickness yet even?

I had a movement of gas so painful i gasped. I was driving home. Thought I might need to pull over!

I really have my hopes up for this month

got a letter cancelling my lupus doctor appointment in January. But no worries, they rearranged it, for 5 minutes later in the room next door.

Silliness.

lmao honey why do they bother wasting the paper!

As if i would have even noticed!

I change my surname with them last time i was there. They have left my title as Miss. Very annoying.

Haha honey, what a waste of time! Good they rearranged it so close though, in my experience a cancelled appointment means months of waiting!

Is there POAS today?! I am behind from yesterday's convos as wasn't around much.

Ooh yes aren't there POAS things happening today? lemon was it you?

Thanks for well-wishes ladies.

Having read back a little, I've just popped back to say jelly, I hope your nan is well after all. And lil, I'm rooting for you. Well done on getting this far. Purple, I hope you're well on the way to getting your cape back on.

Chat I'd love to come over to grads if I can find it. Have avoided thus far as I figured my moaning about nausea wouldn't make interesting reading. But it is a little better these days.

Good luck all, will keep you posted :)

Hmm wouldn't say it felt that quick! But happy to have reached half way to the golden line! honey that has happened to me with loads of places too, even more annoying when you change it face to face and despite saying Mrs they still assume you're not married I admit I sometimes get id'd buying paracetamol honestly though, and people wander why the NHS is loosing money??

Morning all. Really appreciate the well wishes. I've not spoken about it to anyone except for on here because it will seem a lot more serious if I do.

To top my wonderful week off my grandad is now in hospital for an op tomorrow, so really this has just been the most perfect week.........

Oh well there's always next week. In other news it's Friday :)

Who is POAS today? Excited for you. DP and I didn't DTD last night because he didn't get in until I was asleep...dirty stop out!

Happy Friday viroids!
Get pissing on them there sticks!.

It's in the ante-natal clubs section Before and it pretty much is us just moaning about symptoms or lack of them!

I had no symptoms when I got bfp I just knew coz I felt same as in September.

Get peeing viroids and gx!

before the link at the the top of this Fred I think (or page 1 of this Fred)

Aaaalil sorry bc is messing you around!!

jelly so sorry about nan, but you know nans know best so try and be calm yeah right

unfortunately tink yes she did. not in the vengeful way i expected her to mind, but she definitely moved in for a few days! just want her to naff off again now so i can start again lol!! I can poas for you anyway if it will indulge you?! lol!! and don't worry i don't think you were being pressurizing, i need some stick action too!!
Maybe you have a supercharged-in-tune-with-your-uterus-leftboob??

Lil do you work in something to do with mortgages/banking? I have a question. blatantly barging into thread with own agenda. Sorry you're feeling crappy.

I'm an accountant wil but have some mortgage/banking knowledge. ask away.