TTC after MC - the best shit place to be!

[Treaclepie19]

The Rules...

(1) A lady may only POAS on a Friday.
(2) Friday means the day that everyone calls Friday in the time zone where you spent the night.
(3) Rule (1) does not apply to POA-OPK-S, UNLESS they are being illegitimately used as surrogate HCG detectors, in which case Rule (1) most definitely does apply
(4) Rule (1) does not apply following a BFP because if you want to waste £25 a day POADigiS that's your prerogative
(5) Rule (1) does not apply if a lady is POAS in an attempt to get a BFN to prove she can start DTD with intent
(6) Rule (1) does not apply if a lady wants for unknown reason to pee on an actual stick, like a twig or some such, if that lady is unexpectedly caught short whilst tramping in the forest looking for bears.
(7) These rules (including Rule (1)) are subject to the change at any time if the ladies of the Posifrickentivity thread decide on a whim come up with empirical evidence to prove that it is luckier to POAS on any other day of the week
(8) Violators of Rule (1) shall be subject to fish throwing.

And as a grand finale, why not pledge to NEVER POAS before 14DPO?

Mine was only 6 weeks but I think it hit me hard because it was our first BFP after a year of trying and DH and I got so excited and were planning everything, thinking of names etc so i felt the need to commemorate it but I think if i was to get pregnant again and lose the baby as early that I wouldn't commemorate it as I know I wouldn't get as excited again and plan so much.

I was going to wait until after christmas and see what my body is doing then so that would be three cycles I think (mc in sept and regular cycles since then) but I might look into soy if no joy on the babymaking. Thanks for the info :)

Oops sorry Daisy cross posted. Thank you hun, will let you all know how it goes. I'm hoping it does some good and clears the air.

Plus that's a lovely idea about the charm. I have a Pandora bracelet I could buy one for and the baby was due the day before my birthday so a birthstone wouldn't be asked about really which is a good thing I think.

I'm also not going to let myself get excited if we fall pregnant again (so I say) until we have had the 12 week scan. I will still want early scans if I can have them but that won't reassure me considering we had a scan at 6 weeks with our baby and everything was fine at the time, to then find out at 10 weeks everything wasn't fine.

Good luck on the baby making! Hoping we all get beautiful babies in the near future.

I also love the idea if jewellery. Mine was a bit early I think but if it happens again I definitely will.

Sorry everyone is having such a tough time. Waves to Haribo, hope you are ok?

I wear a pandora leather bracelet with a silver heart I had made with "I carry you in my heart" on the front and the date I lost my little ectopic baby on the back. Brings me comfort

I'm nearly 9 weeks pregnant now and much as I'm so grateful, after an ectopic and a chemical this year, all I feel at the minute is uncertainness and fear. Feel almost cheated. Hopefully if all is well after Harmony test and scan, I can relax and enjoy it a bit.

Oh tranquility, i hope you can relax a hit after your scan.

I'm thinking of ordering after turquoise bracelet to remember our little one. Turquoise is the birthstone for December when baby would've been due.
I was only 8+3 when I miscarried but it did hit me hard.

Treacle it would hit me very hard then too. That is a long time to get excited and start planning.

I always feel silly though because I'd had scans and knew something was wrong. We hadn't even seen baby. I'd just kept positive and hopeful that dates were off :(

FYI ladies.. even if you don't feel you need to commiserate your loss with something in particular, ??I think sparkly stuff is good for the soul any excuse treat yourself to remind yourself how strong you are.

As anybody would Treacle, of course you kept hoping for the best. You shouldn't feel silly about that.

Very good point Chasing

Treacle, I was 'only' 8weeks too. It doesn't matter when it happens. A loss is a loss. You've nothing to be silly about.

Treacle, it doesn't matter how early, it's still a part of us lost. I was due 21 December so it is hard x

Thank you ladies x
I was due Xmas eve. That gets me in tears even now. I love Xmas. No idea how I'll cope.

Oh god I'm so sorry if my comment has offended, I honestly didn't mean to infer that an early MC wasn't worth commemorating.

For me I bled from the beginning, never saw a heartbeat and then lost the pregnancy at 6 weeks. Then my second was basically a chemical. So it really felt to me that I never even got two steps forward, it was over before 2 weeks of knowing had passed.

Newera I didn't take your post offensively at all, sorry if my post made you think I had! Every body feels very different about their early losses I think. I know that I lost a baby..but it feels much less like a baby for me, more like a deep sadness that they'll never get to be a living part of our family. I look at my girl and feel hurt that my bean doesn't get the chance to be a person like her. I think I want a little somthing, I was thinking of a ring with engraving on the inner side. Something subtle just for me.

Please can I join this thread?
I've just been through a natural miscarriage at 11 weeks. I had another in jan 08 at 9 weeks and am lucky enough to have a 5 yr old.
We were so happy to have caught after many discussions of whether to TTC no2 and the timing was great for schools and childcare etc. I'm 34 and OH 10 yrs older and am very aware of both our ages and the ever increasing potential age gap between children. I feel empty since the MC and just want to try again. Dr said just to wait til bleeding stops and when you're ready, no longer advised to wait 3 months.
I admit I haven't read the entire thread but it appears some TTC immediately after?

eggs I'm so sorry you find yourself here. I hope you are recovering physically well.
You can ttc as soon as you feel ready, once your hcg is 0 you'll ovulate again. This can vary from person to person on how long it takes.

I hope you're ok x

Eggs - sorry you've found yourself here.

Waves at Tranquility - I know that I'll be a nervous wreck until at least 12 weeks next time around. Keeping everything crossed for you. The same goes for Purple

Amyy - big hugs. We would have had our 12 week scan on Wednesday and I felt really rubbish all day. My BFF had hers on Thursday. I'm really dreading seeing her at the moment. Given that our babies were due a day apart, I just think every time I see her is going to serve as a constant reminder of how far along I should have been. Any advice for dealing with this would be very much appreciated.

Monten - really hope AF stays away.

Chasing - Keeping everything crossed that your hcg levels have dropped by tomorrow.

No newera you didn't offend me!!!
Don't worry about that x

I honestly do feel stupid for mourning my loss still. Mainly because everyone else moved on 6 months ago... that's not your fault!

Thank you Cariad, I am a nervous wreck, particularly today for some reason, I have all but convinced myself it's not going to work out.
Sorry you have been feeling so down, that is really tough re your friend, such a difficult situation. I really hope you get your sticky bean soon.

Thanks for the wave purple. To be honest today has felt difficult. Someone on our group announced their pregnancy (your announcement felt okay, i'm not sure why) and it just hit me that i should have had a baby a few months older :( i'm so happy for her, just devastated for my loss.
I have everything crossed for you that this pregnancy is sticky for you. I know how nervous you must be feeling though, the longest 7 weeks ever i'm sure. Thinking of you xx

Amyy sounds like a hard day. I hope you and your DP can talk it all out this weekend.

eggs i'm sorry to see you here. I had a mmc at 9+1 weeks (i thought i was 10 weeks) 2 weeks ago yesterday and we started ttc yesterday. We plan to just DTD every 2 to 3 days in the hope of catching the egg, whenever it may turn up.

Someone showed me a poem called 'snow drop' that really rang true for me. I'm thinking of getting a tiny snowdrop tattoed on my ankle. I only have one other (a compass on my wrist from my travelling days!) so not huge on them but that little bean was a part of me, so i'd like to mark it on me. Here's the poem:

Little Snowdrop

The world may never notice, If a Snowdrop doesn't bloom,
Or even pause to wonder, If the petals fall too soon.
But every life that ever forms, Or ever comes to be,
Touches the world in some small way, For all eternity.
The little one we long for, Was swiftly here and gone.
But the love that was then planted, Is a light that still shines on.
And though our arms are empty, Our hearts know what to do.
Every beating of our hearts, Says that we love you.

Author Unknown

Haribo, I'm in tears. That is so so true.

Haribo I thought that would have been difficult, that's why I asked, I'm thinking of you, really hope you are one of the ones that get pregnant on the wtf cycle.
That poem is beautiful and the snowdrop is a lovely idea. That way your little one will always be a part of you xxx

Thanks Purple. Sorry you're feeling so anxious. Hopefully, as the weeks pass, you'll start feeling as though it might actually happen this time around. That's what I'm hoping will happen to me at least, although personally, I'd quite like to be anaesthetised from the second I get my BFP until my baby's ready to be handed to me at full term - if only it were that easy!

I'm hoping things will get easier with my friend over time. I really wish I didn't feel overwhelmed with sadness every time I think about it.

eggs so sorry for your loss. Did they check that everything has passed (sorry to be so clinical). From my understanding if you either have had a scan to confirm you have passed everything or test negative on first response tests, then you can TTC as soon as you want to.

Cariad so sorry for your loss too :( that must be so difficult for you. I find it hard to pretend I'm happy for not so close friends. I've had to stop going on Facebook for a while because it's just too upsetting. My OHs best friends girlfriend is 20 odd weeks pregnant and we are supposed to be meeting up with all our friends including them in a couple of weeks and I just don't think I can face her. So I'm so sorry but I really can't give any advice :(