Break the bed, marvel at the ghost sperm, ignore the fuss about avatar pandas and whatever you do - don't eat the jizz! It's Just Shagging Part 28

[Leela5]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied and adapted from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others.

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in!

JIAC = Jizz in a Cup. Preferable to jizz on the carpet. This one's for the lucky men in our lives.

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession.

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture!

TWPU - Two Week Piss Up!

The link to Part 27 is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2157458-Get-your-cape-on-get-your-cape-on-Dont-come-knockin-if-the-tents-a-rockin-but-pee-on-a-snake-instead-Its-just-shagging-part-27" target="_blank">here</a>

The current Grads Fred is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/2160935-Just-Shagging-Thread-11-for-Graduated-Viroids?" target="_blank">here</a>

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/health-news/the-dark-side-of-mumsnet-my-shocking-tour-of-the-websites-nether-regions-8905055.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">here</a>

Happy shagging, shaggers!

Pant SNOT not pant ABOUT

I want to POAS too but a) I'm am currently in my mind telling me I can't physcially get upduffed due to my lack of periods and b) promised myself I'd wait till this weekend...

Though I do have a stash of IC's at home lol!

No..bad me...no

JELLY! JELLY!

I was 12dpo, but it was FMU...

honey a note referring to your last post on old Fred. Your sister sounds a bit mean! I'd tell her to mind her own business and ignore xx

Gaggia! Definitely a line on that top one! Congrats :)

Jelly, tomorrow morning? Please?!

Grats gaggia ooh great start to the Fred!

And snort at dark secret rose heheh

No jelly!! Don't leave me to POAS solo this weekend!!

Why where they even talking about her secret rose?! I like a chocolate starfish myself but my temping gas been taken via my ear, not my back door!

Has! Not gas...although a so e what appropriate autocorrect given the subject...

definite lines on both gaggia and I am the queen of ic bfns so I call it official! congrats!

you lot are weird, I put my thermometer in my gob!

Once when I went to the fish shop, they had a chocolate starfish in a marine tank. DH pointed it out to me and I got the giggles really badly, I'm like a child :p

Chocolate starfish are real?! Brilliant!

Just popped in to do stats (still lurking here) and wow you've been chatty today! Nice one gaggia!

Currently upduffed (love this word) with blueberry #2 due around 1 May, product of the last bumper BFP Fred

Hiya ladies!! I'm hooooome

Just got back from my holidays and have loads of washing, bummer hate returning home :(

Nice new thread and I've lots to tell you girls . I haven't being able to log on much whilst in Paris because I've been on cloud 9, ehm....Mr Jay proposed to me by the bridge Bir-Hakeim!! It was just like in the movies!!! There was a huge banner with 'Will You Marry Me, [name]?' and there was a photographer acting as a papparazzi. Mr Jay then proposed to me with the ring around a tiny silver eiffel tower, and then we walked to the gardens by the Eiffel Tower and we had a picnic laid by the photographers husband. It was perfect, could not have asked for anything more!! For dinner we went to the Ciel de Paris, a restaurant at a tower 54 storeys high, with the most amazing view of Paris!

Back to TTC land. 13dpo today and af is a day late. Boobs are hurting and my nipples are like darts lol. Tummy is very tight and my upper tummy muscles feel like I've done 100 sit ups. Today I was feeling a tug like from my bellybutton down. Feel nausea from time to time and I am famished when it's lunchtime or dinnertime. I know I said I wasn't going to test until tomorrow but what the heck a BFP after our anniversary and proposal would be the bomb. I have a bunch of cheapies and 2 FRER's (which I don't want to waste now) so I tested on a cheapie. Obviously it was a negative. When is it best to test? Shall I leave the testing until the weekend?

So my stats are as follows:-
CurlyJay19 - 44
TTC #1 since March 2013
DC - none
Pets - none

It's sometimes called a chocolate chip starfish, but also known as a chocolate starfish!! snigger

Wow, Curly! What a proposal, congratulations for me, in honour . My DH proposed on holibobs too: Majorca, sunset on the beach with the ring having been surreptitiously sized using my jewelry box and his little finger! He'd only asked my dad's permission too.

FMU and a FRER tomorrow?

I haven't got time to read just now but are you bloody chatterboxes on 118 posts already?! I've only just managed to finish reading the last one. And Honey I can't believe your sister said that. So insensitive. Will check in later.

Many Grats curly it sounds lovely :)

No I will wait till this weekend to POAS I'll be good :)

Jelly your album cover pic comment made me laugh so much I spat over my keyboard!

AMAZING proposal curly. Congratulations and FX for a BFMFP!

I have a starfish in my fishtank. He's brown and white striped... ;)

Oh curly how romantic! Why don't you buy a frer to celebrate?

I like that chocolate starfish! I like chocolate in all its forms. I'm eying up a shopping bag full of chocolate bars as we speak. Since it is my sincere honour to run the office tuck shop I keep New stock at home mmmmmmmmmmm.

If anyone deserves it you do gaggia !!

Are you going to get a FRER?

curly your man sounds adorable. Can he give my DP some hints ;)

jelly I just did another ic and its still bfp so I'm going to try a Tesco own brand tomorrow with fmu just to be absolutely sure. I'll probably test every day til it sinks in.

Tesco ones are shite Gaggia. Congratulations though!!!

And to you Curly on your engagement. What a lovely start to the thread.

Name: Wil
Age: 34
TTC since: Dec 13. Currently 4 1/2 months upduffed.
Children: 1 terrible two year old.