Anyone got pregnant with no.1 very quickly bit struggling with no.2?

[tattyteddy]

Hello,

Was just wondering whether anybody has had a similar experience?

When trying for first child got pregnant the first month, however that ended in MC. Luckily I got pregnant again with DD after first month of trying again.

DD is now three, we would have started TTC sooner but I went back I Uni and I'm due to finish in November.

We have been trying for 5 months and no luck, worried that I've left it too late as I'm now 37.

AF seems to have arrived this morning, which I'm actually glad about! Was starting to worry something else had gone wrong with my cycle. I wonder if the lack of spotting and cramping could be down to the acupuncture? It seems unlikely after just two sessions, but she did say this was something she could help with...

Sorry about AF metal but how interesting about the accupuncture sounds very promising :)

loves yeh maybe, at the end of the day we are managing to DTD around ov & it only takes one sperm, I guess I'm a bit scared to go back in case they say again that it's my age & I feel embarrassed for asking for further tests!

Metal sorry about AF. Maybe the lack of spotting & cramps is down to the acupuncture. Are you having another session?

Well I've done stupid symptom spotting, I woke up feeling poorly nauseous & very light headed, I'm 5dpo so need to get a grip!! Anyway I went back to sleep & woke up feeling a bit better.

Actually ignore what I said about the cramps, they just took longer to get started. Ouch.

But yes I'm going to carry on with the acupuncture for a while bobsy and see if it helps. Also got my soy ready to take next week, so onwards and upwards!

Sorry about AF metal, sounds like acupuncture is making a difference though so hopefully that + soy will do the job next cycle. Hope you can take it easy this weekend, put your feet up and have a

Sorry Bobsy I didn't mean to add to the symptom spotting temptation! I actually get pretty much all the pregnancy symptoms I had with DS (except sore boobs) every tww now, it's so annoying! Has been happening for the last 6 months or so and is probably purely psychological, but it does make it very hard to stop thinking about it which makes the 2ww drag so much! I agree with loves that it is worth pushing for more tests even though you are still struggling to get DH to DTD more often. Your age may be a factor but doesn't mean that there isn't something else wrong that is easily fixable, loads of people get pregnant much older than you are.

Loves did you say you had an unusually long AF this cycle? I've known a few people have that a while after dc1 and go on to conceive that cycle (seems to clear out the system or something), so you never know. I am quietly hopeful for you this cycle anyway!

I got my peak fertility static smiley this morning and DH is due back this evening so hopefully still just in time (I usually ovulate the same day I get the positive test). Is it too obsessive that I cancelled a night away tonight so that we don't miss our only chance? I have pretty low expectations for this cycle anyway but am only on cd22 and often ovulate much much later so I'm just pleased it's not a super-long cycle and I won't have to wait long to start on my new strategy - exercise, healthy eating, no caffeine and soy!

Mister I can symptom spot without anyone tempting my latest one is my boobs feel slightly more sore than normal at this point! That is either my imagination or down to the soy! I think everyone is right I do need to make an appointment to see the doctor after this cycle, might have to get AF out of the way first so I don't burst in to tears in the surgery. I can't help it but I do blame OH maybe if we could do with the doc said ditch the OPK's & just enjoy each other but we can't.

Oh good glad DH is back in time for ovation. No it's not I'd have done the same thing & cancelled plans if they interfered with ovulation.

bobsy last time I got pregnant we only dtd once, on the day I got my +opk, so I really wouldn't get too hung up on the fact that you don't dtd lots.

I got my referral to the fertility clinic through today, my appointment is on 24 November.

Metal that's good to know.

Good news about getting your fertility appointment.

metal, glad you've got an appointment. At least you are on the road to getting some answers.

ginger, I tested the day I was due, as I had a suspicion I could be pg - I felt nauseous on the ferry on holiday, and the last time that happened was when I was pg with DS. Still didn't expect the bfp though - I was in a state of shock for a good half hour.

Morning all, how is everyone? I'm feeling quite down this weekend, despite now having a date for my appointment. AF is really light again this month, and as it's now been established that I'm ovulating fine I'm back to being convinced that I've got scarring in my uterus and that's why we haven't been able to conceive again since the mc. If I'm right it will probably be really difficult to get pregnant again and would involve thousands of pounds worth of private surgery...

I know I'm getting ahead of myself a bit, but just have this feeling that it's never going to happen for us, I'm usually quite good at self diagnosing. I'm very tempted to go and see the private specialist in London, though I suppose I should at least wait for my NHS appointment and see what they say first. What's another month of waiting in the grand scheme of things!

Hope everybody else is having a better weekend.

Morning! Sorry I've been MIA...been at my Mums minus DH which isn't that relaxing. Whilst I love seeing my family they don't really muck in with DS so I'm shattered!! Looking forward to going home later.

Metal sorry your feeling down. I know what you mean about self diagnosing. I really feel I have low progesterone but will have to wait for my bloods to actually see. If you can afford the specialist would it be worth going so you don't have another month of anxiety?

Guinness - best news ever!! Gives me hope that this can happen!!

I'm on phone so can't read loads of the other messages but hope everyone is ok.

I'm on cd13. Been getting high on the ovulation sticks for 3 days but not DTD as not seen DH! Thought maca was going to make me ovulate early as I'm norm around cd17 but no ewcm yet. Going to try DTD tonight to cover the bases!

Couple of pg announcements from friends this week. First my NCT friend announced she was pg this week (first of our group). Bit tough to hear but also pleased for her as she did have a tough time conceiving DD. Second was a friend whose been trying for 5 years. Has PCOS, then cervical cancer, then 4 rounds of IVF, 2 mc and now finally she's 14 weeks. I'm so pleased for her and it gives me hope that we should be able to do this too if she can get through all of that!

Oh Metal I'm sorry you're feeling so down. Try not to get ahead of yourself until you find out for sure what is wrong, I know that is easier said than done, maybe make the appointment with the specialist rather than worrying yourself while you wait.

I'm feeling a bit down as I'm due AF next Thurday, I know that's still a few days off but I'm already dreading it. I'm on 7dpo and not a sign of anything apart from feeling a little more hungry than usual but I'm sure that is because AF is due.

I've asked OH if he will come to the docs with me when I make another appointment. I'm probably going to go the week after next when AF is out of the way as I don't want to have a melt down like last time!

I'm 38 but 21 cycles of trying surely I have every reason to make an appointment to have more tests, I was 36 when I started trying.

Treesandbees Pregnancy announcements are so hard, but I suppose when you know they've struggled it's not so bad especially your second friend who has been through so much, good for her that really is great news. I find it really hard when its people who have conceived as soon as they started TTC. There are people who have conceived and had babies in the time I've been trying so that is difficult to take and also someone who got pg with second straight after coming off the pill.

Morning, metal sorry to hear you were/ are feeling down, I second trees if you can afford the private specialist then do it a month can be a bloody long time when you are stuck in this endless cycle of waiting and timing and hoping. Having said that it's good that the NHS appointment is on the 24th that seems quite quick from what I've seen.

Trees it looks like the macca had an effect then it's quite heartening to see that these things we are all trying (acupuncture, macca, soy) are actually doing something to much of TTC is guesswork and wondering if anything is working!

bobsy I think it's brilliant that you are getting your DH to go to the doctors with you maybe if he hears these things from a professional it will have more effect? also it might bring it home that you guys are in this together?

mister I did have an unusually long AF this last cycle and I really don't know what that could mean is that why I'm late now? I'm on CD30 so 3/4 days late I was doing quite well until this morning but now my head is going round in circles again, I need some courage ladies haven't told my husband I'm late don't have any PG tests at home. I don't have sore boobs but I'm convinced I'm getting AF cramps now but no AF.

Sorry for waffling I'm scared I'm going to be disappointed because chances are this is just another wonky cycle right? So I've reverted to my default setting, ostriching, head in the sand while quietly panicking and now I've written this all down when it's a BFN it's going to be harder to pretend everything is ok.

Eeek loves I don't know how you've managed not to test yet?! Do you think you will do it today? I've got everything crossed for you that this is your month.

trees that's tough with the pregnancy announcements, but I agree it's easier to bear if you know they've not had an easy ride themselves and gives you some hope that it can happen even after a long time. Hope you managed to dtd last night to keep you in the running for this month!

bobsy hopefully a trip to the GP will give your DH a bit of a kick up the backside. Are you going to see a different doctor than before?

Thanks for the support ladies, I'm still feeling pretty down but at least we're going away for a week on Saturday so that's something to look forward to. DH is going for his SA this week, and I think I will wait for my NHS appointment. Seeing the specialist would be £500 including the diagnostic 3D ultrasound, which is a lot of money, and especially if I'm right with my concerns I could be looking at having to spend thousands on private treatment to try and fix things, which would be a real stretch. I just hope once I've seen the NHS gynae I don't have to wait ages for any other tests they might agree to do...

In the meantime I'm going to give the soy a go this cycle, CD4 today so will take 100mg tonight until Wednesday and then up it to 150mg for Thu & Fri.

I'm just scared, how stupid is that? It's not even rational.

Glad your feeling the support metal this morning when I was thinking about if I got a BFN I thought to myself I won't be alone I can come talk to you guys and it made me feel better. I didn't realise a private appointment would be so expensive wow! I can see why you would wait for the NHS and if they were this quick with your appointment then hopefully any other tests wouldn't have a long waiting list either?

OK have spoken to DH he is getting tests will POAS tonight, whatever will be will be

Not stupid at all loves, I think we're all scared of the disappointment every month. Good luck for tonight!!

Loves Its not stupid at all, I've felt the same so many times in the past. Fingers crossed for you.

Metal That is a lot of money, maybe it is worth waiting. Sorry you're still feeling down. How long before you get the results of DH's SA? A week away is probably just what you need, take your mind of things for a bit.

I'm feeling really down today, I've cried and I've got angry that I still can't get pregnant! I'm only on 8dpo but not a sniff of implantation and the fact I'm feeling the way I am today is a sign that AF is on her way! Why would I even think this month would be any different from the other 20 flaming months!!! I'm back to thinking that giving up is the best thing to do, I know I've said this before and I think deep down it's the right thing to do rather than keep putting myself through this and the fact it'll be 2 years in January since we started TTC. I need to get out from under this cloud that is TTC now. I just need to persuade myself and OH it's the right thing to do, and start making plans instead of putting things off in case I'm pregnant like a booking a holiday abroad! DD wants to go to Euro Disney so trying to persuade OH that we should book for next year before she starts proper school and we have to go in the school holidays when its twice the price!

oh bobsy im so sorry your feeling down too :( do you think your ready to give up? can you picture how your life might be if you decide to stop trying ? it must be the most difficult decision to make and I can't imagine how you go about it, here to listen if you want to talk through it at all.

Thanks loves I appreciate that. No I don't think I am, but I feel like I might be kidding myself to carry on, it's just been too long and I'm not far ofF 40. I think I'd be less stressed but I'd be unhappy & I'd worry I might have regrets for not keep going for longer. It's not as if I could give up but then get pregnant as we won't be DTD. I'm so confused. As if the imminent arrival of AF isn't bad enough there has to be the hormones to make it even harder to deal with. There's also trying to get OH in the mood every month to DTD and that is so stressful. He doesn't understand how bad I feel when AF arrives he just thinks oh we can try again next month!

Oh Bobsy sorry you feel like giving up. You still have a chance this month so maybe it will be your month? Fx for you! I think evoking the law of sod is the way to go. I've signed up to some hard core training this month to hope to do that!

Loves...have you poas yet??

Metal blimey...£500 is a lot of money. At least you have a week away to distract you. Off anywhere nice?

So...had my solid smiley yest. Earliest I've ever had a 'peak' and v annoyingly we've not DTD yet. We tried last night but we we're both shattered then DH got 'mental block' and couldn't finish. Sorry TMI but bloody annoying!!! He gets this every now and again. So going to try again tonight but think we've missed our chance this month. Although still not had an ewcm?! Beginning to wonder if I've been doing this all wrong now. Is there a chance I can get ewcm after ovulation?

bobsy I think the thing about your situation which makes it harder is that if you give up its very final. A lot of people probably have a kind of halfway point where they give up trying but don't bother with contraception and still kinda hope it could happen. With your situation if you give up then its for good because as you say you wouldn't still be DTD. It doesn't sound like your at that point yet though? I'm hoping that when you drag your DH along to the docs with you they can talk some sense into him fx for you. FWIW that friend of mine who just announced her second pg is 39 so really age doesn't have to be a factor.

I POAS and it was a BFN it's funny how mean and vindictive a little white box can seem, I was properly angry at that little stick!! Then at my DH then I shouted at my DS so all in all a pretty crummy evening. Still no AF and last night I had the worst cramps not like usual AF cramps really really painful reminded me of the cramps I had on my honeymoon, I was pregnant then but didn't know and had a MC a few weeks later. So all in all I don't have a clue whats going on and I feel shit, life's shit and unfair and confusing. Roll on next week when I have gotten AF out the way and get some of my hope back :(

Oh loves, I'm so sorry it was a BFN. Sending you a big hug. It is shit, every single time it happens, but especially if you're late or had really strong symptoms.

trees do you check your cm internally? Bit of a personal question I know, but I've had a few months where I only discovered the ewcm by poking around right up near my cervix .

We're off to Germany to visit my parents for a week, which should be very relaxing as my mum just does everything while we're there and DD will happily spend all day bossing around playing with my dad!

bobsy go and book that holiday! You really need to stop letting ttc rule your life, I'm not saying give up trying but don't put other things on hold 'just in case'. And if you do get pregnant and have to cancel you'd most likely only lose your deposit, but in that case I bet you wouldn't care about a few hundred £ wasted .

AF has pretty much finished now, so that's one day of medium flow and three days light to very light - it's just not right. I'm driving myself crazy, on the one hand I think I'm massively overreacting and becoming obsessed with the idea that I've got Asherman's, on the other hand I think how can this all be a coincidence?! If only it wasn't so expensive to go private I would do it tomorrow.

Forgive my ignorance but what is Ashermans and what symptoms do you have to be honest you know your body better than anyone else does!

I'd never heard of it either before all this loves! Asherman's is where you develop scar tissue or adhesions in the uterus, usually following surgery such as the erpc I had for my mmc. My symptoms are much lighter periods and not being able to conceive, and on my ultrasound my endometrial lining was only 5mm on CD18, which the sonographer put down as normal but I think is too thin.