Anyone got pregnant with no.1 very quickly bit struggling with no.2?

[tattyteddy]

Hello,

Was just wondering whether anybody has had a similar experience?

When trying for first child got pregnant the first month, however that ended in MC. Luckily I got pregnant again with DD after first month of trying again.

DD is now three, we would have started TTC sooner but I went back I Uni and I'm due to finish in November.

We have been trying for 5 months and no luck, worried that I've left it too late as I'm now 37.

oh Littlepoot, sorry to hear that. Though it is good news that it could still happen for you... what will you do?

So I have some news... got a BFP this morning...

Sorry Little, I totally didn't read for comprehension there. Will be thinking of you and praying for good results on the scans x

Congratulations guiness we needed a BFP on here :)

Little You sound low, I'm sorry the appointment wasn't what you were hoping for. So when do you have your other tests booked for? Try not to worry about problems they may or may not find until they do ro do not find them. Then you can decide how to deal with it. Arn't the chances of having a blocked tube very small anyway? As for IVF I know it doesn't sound like an option for you but the success rate at 40 is more like 20% with your own eggs and much higher with donor eggs.

but most of all look after yourself you sound quite defeated :( do you have anything nice planned you can look forward too? Big hugs TTC sucks

guiness congratulations, I hope you have a healthy pregnancy.

Little I'm sorry to hear about your appointment, I think that's the kind of news we all dread being told. However, loves is right, try and keep your chin up and see what the scans show first before you descend into despair! (Easily said, I know.)

I'm feeling pretty rubbish too today, had insomnia for the second night in a row so am shattered and AF is most definitely on her way as my temp has dropped.

DH is off to the doctors at 10 to ask for an SA. I think I will give the soy a go after all, my SIL who's a gynaecologist said she would try to induce ov with something like clomid as a next step, even though my hormone levels all seem to be ok. Unfortunately she's in Germany so I can't get treated by her!

Any sign of AF for you yet Ginger? Still got my fx for you this month.

Congratulations Guinness! Great to have another bfp on the thread.

Little I'm sorry you are feeling so down, that does sound disheartening. Fingers crossed the tests come back clear, from what I've read healthy lifestyle + losing weight can make all the difference if it's related to ovarian cysts , polyps, anything hormonal. There is definitely still hope!

Metal sorry AF is on her way, It's a horrible feeling of knowing she's about to show up and dash your chances for another month, tho I usually keep kidding myself that it could be an implantation dip/bleed until AF arrives full flow. I always get in plenty of wine in preparation which helps a bit!

Bobsy woohoo that you managed to convince DH to dtd at what sounds like the perfect time this cycle! (though I still can't believe how difficult he makes it for you) It only takes once if the timing is right, fingers crossed for you this month.

DH's semen analysis has come back normal, so now we just need to work out what's wrong with me. My GP is calling tomorrow to go through the next steps. I had a flashy smiley on my CBFM today and yesterday but DH is away until Friday, so really hoping I don't ovulate until then! He has terrible timing for going away, although when we conceived DS he was actually working 300 miles away and only came home every other weekend!

Well, this SA is going to be fun for DH: the only lab that does it around here is 1hr 20mins drive from us, and the sample has to be delivered within 2 hours of 'production'! So basically he'll have to drive over there and then have a wank in the hospital toilets as they don't have 'facilities to produce samples'...

LittlePoot Sorry to hear things didn't go well at the hospital, but hopefully the scan won't reveal any problems. It's good that you are ovulating and not menopausal so try and focus on the positive things - I know that is easier said than done. When do you have the scan done?

guinessgirl Congratulations

Metal Sorry you're feeling so low and like AF is on her way. I've had a cry and got angry today at the injustice of others getting pregnant so easily when I'm struggling. I'm only 3 DPO and feel the nasty witch is on her way!!

Mister Yeh good timing but only once this cycle and I was so stressed beforehand about whether or not we would end up DTD I feel I could have ruined any chance. Yes it does doesn't and thanks. He is making it unbelievably hard for me, he won't support or understand me and blames me for making it stressful. If we could do stress free no pressure regular sex then I think we'd have a much better chance! Good news about DH's semen analysis. Fx you don't ovulate until DH is home.

Well the bitch got me this morning. Not only is she 3 days early,giving me a crappy 25 day cycle with a 10day LP, but she arrived just before I was going to POAS I'm feeling just sad today, and sorry for myself, struggling to hold it together at work. So far I have had two coffees, four teas, a piece of cake and a chocolate bar! I keep thinking it will get easier each month, but it doesn't does it?? We DTD loads this month, and I was feeling so positive. Not only will I now not be pg for DDs 3rd birthday, but my DBro and family are coming to stay this weekend, he has two little girls 5 and 2 which will be lovely for DD to play with but it will just be in my face all weekend that she doesn't have a sibling to play with too.

I think I might make a private gynae appointment after all, £180 for 40 minutes just to talk it through with someone. My Dr is proving no help at all, I'm struggling to even get an appt with her and I can't just keep waiting another 14 weeks for my NHS gynae appt. Sorry for the ramble, I just need to vent today. I didn't even bother telling DH this morning, do you still tell your DH/DP every month that doesn't work?
metal I'm sorry you're feeling like you're out too. Have you thought anymore about going privately yourself? Or will you try the soy next cycle first? I'm heading to Tesco tonight to pick some up, going to take 80mg for 3 days then 120mg for the last two. Interesting what your SIL says, does she have any other words of wisdom for us!!? How annoying for your poor DH, that's a long round trip just to have a wank!! It's like one of those funny clips you see in movies or sitcoms, having to do it in a toilet, poor guy. When my DH did his he said there were the usual porn mags, and then a caravanning weekly one at the bottom of the pile!!!

guiness congratulations!! How many months did it take you then in the end? Would you say you did anything different this time?
Mister good news about your DHs results. Not so good that he has to work away, but you're timing should be ok this month, just make sure you give him a nice welcome home present on friday!!
Little I'm sorry you're feeling a bit down after your appt, totally understandable. But like others have said, don't worry too much about no treatment being an option until you find out if there is a blockage or something. Chances are there isn't if you've already conceived once, and if there is then the HSG can work well at unblocking it. I know it sucks to be unexplained, but after reading around these threads for the past year, there are still lots of options open to us. Chances are it will be a hormonal/imbalance issue, so acupuncture or reflexology is an option, playing witch Dr with Soya, Maca, EPO etc is an option, radicalising your diet....etc etc I know it's not what any of us want to hear, or have to focus so much time and energy on doing, but Drs telling us there is nothing they can do aside from IVF I don't think necessarily means it's the end of the road. Is DH taking Vit C and doing everything he can to improve his morphology?
..............and you thought your post was long

I'm sorry about AF Ginger, your symptoms sounded so promising. I'm with you on the coffee and chocolate etc, and I've already got a bottle of wine lined up for tonight! At least you saved yourself from wasting an hpt.

That's tough about your brother coming to stay, does he know you're struggling to conceive? Hopefully you'll have a nice time anyway and your DD will enjoy herself.

I would make a private appointment if I were you, it is a lot of money but at least you might get some answers. I will definitely do the same if it looks like I'd have to face a long wait on the NHS, though I'll give them a chance first (my referral was only sent off last week). I've ordered some soy and will take them days 4-8, they're 50mg capsules so I'll probably do 3x100mg and 2x150mg.

Unfortunately my SIL didn't have any magic solutions either, she's not a fertility specialist but at least I can get a second opinion on test results etc for free!

Do you know what, you guys have cheered me right up - thanks all for your nice messages. Although I think most of the cheering up might be the images of poor metal's DH driving all that way to wank in a car park. Hope no-one walks past the car at an inopportune moment... I work on the site of our local hospital so ours was easy, but did mean I had to hang around and wait for DH to wank before I went to work, then cradle a pot of little guys all the way in on my bike. The whole thing's just such a joy! Then again, after the whole experience of pregnancy, childbirth and general snot and sick filled parenthood, all worries about dignity and self-pride are pretty much destroyed.

Feeling slightly better today (day 2 of my new healthy eating diet - determined to get back down to nine stone something for the new year....). I don't think IVF is for us - money wise and general stress wise. If I didn't have a child already then I'd definitely do it and just get into debt, but right now it seems harsh on DS to have me so emotionally wrecked for potentially ages with no guarantee of success, rather than focusing on the child I do have. I might change my mind of course, but for now diet and reducing work stress are my ways forward. Not sure when the scans will be. Waiting for a referral for the ultrasound and have to book the HSG myself - you book it on the first day of AF to make sure you're not pregnant when you have it (chance would be a fine thing!). Then we have to wait for the consultant appointment to come through again. She reckoned up to 8 week turnaround for the whole thing, including going back to see her. If we do want IVF then we could pay and do the scans quicker, but otherwise there's no real rush. Sounds like our waiting times aren't as bad as for some of you guys, so it's not so bad.

So sorry to hear your news ginger - I had really high hopes for that one.I do tell DH each month, but only because he asks.And I'm the same that I really get my hopes up month after month. All you should need is egg and sperm - but that's not enough in our cases and it's so frustrating!!! After all those years doing everything not to get pregnant. Grrrr.

But guinnessgirl - huge congratulations to you! You'd been trying nearly a year hadn't you? Great news either way, and fingers crossed for a smooth ride from here on in. x

Gingerbread I am so sorry AF showed her ugly head, I did think you might be next for a BFP. I'm not surprised you are I know that feeling so well, even more of a struggle now for me at work with my pregnant colleague who is starting to show. Plenty of chocolate and wine and whatever else makes you feel better. I had same thoughts when AF arrived last cycle right before DD's 4th birthday! I know what you mean each month seems to be that little bit worse. Not the best time for your brother to be coming with his 2 little one's, I know exactly how that would make me feel, but I hope it ends up being ok for you. I have a melt down each month when AF arrives so I have to tell OH what is wrong with me with a rant and anger at the injustice of it all, also I blame him for making the TTC so difficult!
If you can go private then why not if your GP is messing you around so much and at least then things will move along a lot quicker for you. Chin up easier said than done I know

LittlePoot Glad you're feeling better today and good for you for doing something proactive. I suppose that's not too long to wait. I'm the same regarding IVF we're really not in a position to afford it.

Well I've gorged on chocolate today, and now hit the gin so feeling a bit better! Told DH I'm just going to book the bloody private appt and take it from there. We can't really afford it to be honest, even £180 is splashing out, but I can't keep waiting another 3 months to get anywhere, will have to sacrifice christmas presents for ourselves! metal I'm not sure if he does know, they gave up asking a while ago when are we going to have another one, but I haven't told him and neither has my mum, so whether they have guessed or are just being polite....if they mention it this weekend though I will tell them as the rest of my family knows! Good news that the NHS waiting list for you isn't too bad, hopefully you will only have a month or so to wait, and can start getting some answers. My DM keeps asking me if they have checked me to see if I am attacking DHs sperm (!) and that's why it's not happening, think she must have read somewhere that that can happen after having one child together already, so maybe a question to bear in mind when talking to your Drs?!
Little glad you are feeling better, and glad we helped! I find the support on here is just brilliant, it's such a comfort to be able to chat to ladies going through the same thing You're right about dignity, completely gone out the window!! I thought being pregnant was bad enough, but having a total stranger penetrate you with a dildo cam for twenty minutes........
A healthy eating diet sounds like a great idea, I really need to get back on board with that, I hope it works for you Little. That's a really sensible decision about IVF, in my craziest moments I think I would beg borrow and steal to have it done, but if it actually came down to that, I might have to reconsider. 8 week turnaround is fantastic, you should know by Christmas!
Thank you Bobsy, plenty of chocolate today! It will be lovely to see my brother and nieces, but still bittersweet. How are you feeling after taking the Soy? Noticing any effects? What CD are you on today?

Ginger, sorry that AF got you again. I really do know that feeling, the last couple of months I turned into a bit of a psycho hose beast the day AF arrived. Poor DH. I always told him what had happened though I think he could've guessed

I'm not sure if we did anything very different this time round - actually, DH was feeling quite unwell for a few days so we actually didn't DTD as much as I'd have liked when I was fertile - we just got one shot, roughly 2 days pre OV. Must just be the one that struck lucky. We went on holiday the next day and, embarrassingly, i was so convinced it wouldn't have worked that I had a drink most nights, ate raw seafood... whoops.

We'd been TTC for ten cycles.

Gingerbread chocolate is good! I can't do wine when AF arrives because alcohol & AF hormones are a very bad combination with me. I'm on DPO3 & the only effect I'm noticing is that I've been feeling really hungry since DPO1, can't wait to have my lunch then can't wait to have my tea then still feeling hungry after my tea. It could be the Soy or even the Maca. The £180 will be money well spent if it gets you some answers, but I do know what you mean because it'd be splashing out for us too & I'd be loathe to do it for us because of OH's lack of cooperation although it would be good to know if anything else has been stopping it from happening.

Oh ginger sorry AF got you. yay for the chocolate and gin I go for a combo of red wine and cheese once AF hits me! I agree book the appt and get some answers as bobsy said it would be money well spent especially if it helps ease some of the stress and worry.

little so glad your feeling better, I really appreciate the support on here so lovely to chat to people who just get it!

metal your poor DH but it did make me laugh too, about time we shared some of the indignity around to the men as well :)

I have no idea where I am in the TWW well I know I'm CD26 but no sore boobs which I usually get and not really any symptoms of anything, I'm not sure what to expect because of last months funny cycle so it has been the most relaxing TWW for a while.

Oh no, sorry Ginger, but hurray for gin and chocolate. 14 weeks is a long wait so the private appointment sounds like a good idea (tho expensive!) I think it would be worth it though just to find out your options, I might look in to the same if the wait for my fertility clinic appointment is too long. I don't always tell DH when I get a negative test but he always notices when I get AF as I get quite bad cramps (and drink large quantities of booze while practically teetotal the rest of the time).

Oh dear metal, your poor DH. Still, it seems only fair that they share some of the unglamorous pain that is ttc and pregnancy, we don't get to keep our dignity so why should they! I will tell my DH he got off lightly as he got to 'produce his sample' at home as the hospital is only 10 minutes away, and I dropped it off for him as he felt awkward about it! The thought of you cradling your DH's sample on your bike all the way in to work did make me laugh Little, I think I would have dropped it The instructions we got said to keep the sample pot against your skin under your clothes (like a newborn ) so I had it stuck in my bra and had to fish it out when I got to the reception desk, slightly embarrassing.

Bobsy increased appetite was an early pregnancy symptom for me with DS, but I now get it quite often during the 2ww, not sure why.

We ordered a new storage bench for all DS's toys that arrived yesterday, I showed it to DS and he said 'oh look, it's my new baby sister' and gave it a big cuddle cue me trying not to blub - I wish it was as easy as waiting for the postman! Absolutely no idea where that came from, a couple of his friends have new siblings but maybe he's picking up on my baby obsession too.

Ha - mister, I thought my bra might not be a safe holding place leaning over my bike and cycling over bumps, so stuffed it under the waistband of my trousers. Your DS's comment nearly made me well up too. Mine asks sometimes if there's a baby in my tummy, which kills me as well. If only!

loves, now I don't want to get your hopes up (given that I'm a nightmare of a symptom spotter), but my main symptom of pregnancy was not getting PMT symptoms. Then I went off chocolate and started peeing all the time and that was what made me test. Fingers crossed.....

Oh little I suppose it could be but at the same time my 10 day AF last month could just mean I get my next AF late?? I have no idea I'm usually very regular.

I'm very grateful for my DS's limited speech right now (bilingual so a little slow in both languages) because if he started talking about wanting a sibling I know I would lose it completely. Hat's off to you guys having to deal with that as well.

mister I also get extra hungry in the TWW and it was a pregnancy symptom too, I'm pretty sure it's physchological just like the extra tiredness and extra peeing I do in the TWW. Get's me wondering about those women who fully believe they are pregnant and their body get's fooled too and they end up with a bump and everything. I comfort myself that I might feel like I'm going crazy but I'm not at that stage yet!

Oh and ginger I do tell my DH every month and I hate it I always feel like I'm letting him down which is nut's he doesn't feel like that, but I hate seeing his disappointed face and once I say it out loud it kinda hits me a little harder :(

Mister If only, bit too early for pg symptoms, probably AF.

I've definitely not gone off chocolate either.

I'm up in the night weeing all the time but that's normal for me.

It must be hard for those of you who's little one's are asking for a baby. My DD has not mentioned it much recently and I'm not sure she wants a baby as such more another child the same age as her to play with I think.

This will be my 21st cycle of trying so nearly 2 years and that should be reason enough to give up but can't quite do it. I think it's hard as I've no cooperation from OH or support for that matter and my GP won't do anything more, and I don't feel I can push for more tests as we're just not DTD enough even though we are doing at the right time.

I am glad of being able to talk to people on here as I've no one in RL to talk to.

Taking DD to Disney on Ice tonight so that should be good and take my mind off thing for a bit!

Oh another friend just announced her second pregnancy her first is younger then mine........I love her and I'm happy for her but ouch :(

Aww sorry loves that does hurt even though you're happy for them, so many friends or people I know are pg with second or had second & their first younger than my DD & in some cases on their third!

Hmm normally I'd have spotting by now, but so far, nothing. Not feeling crampy or anything either. Very strange. Definitely not pregnant as I did another test today just to make absolutely sure and it was a glaring BFN.

Sorry about the announcement loves, it does hurt even though you're happy for them. Although I have to say I find it much easier if it's friends, I get completely irrational rage at random strangers or celebs who seem to be popping them out like it's going out of fashion!

Hmm metal.....very strange. What CD and DPO are you on? Have you taken anything this cycle? Usual advice I guess, keep testing eod and hoping....have you tried a frer?
Oh loves how annoying You are so good to be happy for them. I even get jealous of friends buying a house or getting a new job these days as I just think when am I going to get what I want.....god this is turning me into a terrible person!
My DD makes random references to things being her sister, she even told me the other day I was her sister! She hasn't asked for a sibling or baby outright yet, but that might change after this weekend....
Bobsy try and keep it going and staying positive for another few cycles, they do reckon 2 years is still within normal, and if you still aren't having any luck I think you should go back to your Dr, tell her she is being ridiculous and insensitive blaming it on your age, tell her you have both been putting in the effort for the last few months to DTD more (it should only take one sperm and one egg after all) and tell her she needs to repeat the bloods etc. Maybe try and save up a bit to go and see a private consultant next year? If nothing more then for a chat to see what they think your options are. Disney on Ice sounds like fun, I bet your DD will be in heaven!!
Mister poor you, but that did make me laugh about your DH saying a storage bench was his little sister! Where do they get these things from?!
I'm loving these stories of the ridiculous situations we are finding ourselves in going through all these tests etc! We should right a book!
guiness so pleased you got your BFP, think it's time we all booked a boozy holiday, seems to do the trick! Don't worry about the drinking or fish, you don't share a blood stream until at least 5 weeks. Did you just wait until you were late before you POAS or were you suspicious beforehand you might be pg?
loves do you think you will POAS tomorrow?

Metal I'd say same as Ginger, from what I've read some people don't get a BFP till there a few weeks gone so you never know.

Ginger this has turned me in to a jealous person as well, it's so hard seeing others get what they want so easily when were struggling! My DD has an imaginary sister who she often 'talks' to but she talks about her sisters mum too so I don't think she quite understands. She has said before that she wants a brother & a sister. I know you're right that's all it should take & we did DTD 3 times during my fertile window last cycle. I might start looking in to it. What puts me off about seeing my GP again is when I saw the one who referred me for blood tests she said we should DTD more often. The GP who told me it was my age did advise me to ditch the OPK's & 'enjoy' each other so basically having no pressure but unfortunately that just doesn't work with my OH. Disney on Ice was amazing DD loved it & did make me think its great to be able to do stuff like this with her & spoil her a bit before her sibling comes along.

bobsy I'm usually an advocate for straight down the line truth but in this circumstance might it be ok to stretch that a little? Go to the GP and say we are DTD plenty and it's still not working so what's next?, sometimes if there is a seemingly obvious reason (not enough DTD) people get complacent about looking further?

I agree metal it's the celebrities and strangers that really get me annoyed DH finds walking around town with me a bit of a minefield these days! I find it easier with friends because you know their stories and quite often they really do deserve it. How strange about your cycle I was one who didn't get a positive for weeks with DS so I have my fingers crossed for you.

No POAS for me I think with my wonky cycle it's more likely to be that then anything else and I'm in an ok place right now not my usual TWW panic so I will just wait and see :)
(and I'm thoroughly pissed off at POAS and then AF turning up hours later)