Anyone got pregnant with no.1 very quickly bit struggling with no.2?

[tattyteddy]

Hello,

Was just wondering whether anybody has had a similar experience?

When trying for first child got pregnant the first month, however that ended in MC. Luckily I got pregnant again with DD after first month of trying again.

DD is now three, we would have started TTC sooner but I went back I Uni and I'm due to finish in November.

We have been trying for 5 months and no luck, worried that I've left it too late as I'm now 37.

LittlePoot No they haven't not as far as I know, just had a scan and blood tests and all clear. When I last went to see the doctor after my blood tests she basically said there was nothing else to test and went on to say at my age the quality of my eggs is not as good and I'm not producing as many eggs, I came out of there feeling like I was infertile. It's like well what do I expect at my age. I know I'm really feeling down with it all I just feel I've no support at all, all me and OH are doing at the moment is arguing because of the stress I feel about having to DTD with him when he's so reluctant. I know that idea sounds great in principle but I am losing all confidence in myself now, not good.

HazleNutt I think all doctors must have different ideas about fertility, I don't know if I could perhaps see a different doctor within the practice, I may just try that.

At the moment I'm starting to think it's not meant to be because everything seems to be against me and each month for the last few months I've tried something else to help and it's not worked. This cycle I've tried the Soya Isoflavones, I've read great things about people getting pregnant from taking them so I was feeling positive about the fact I'd taken them this cycle until I realised I hadn't taken enough.

Been thread lurking for awhile and wondered if I can join? AF arrive again this morning and need some moral support! Got pg 1st month of trying last time although it ended in an early miscarriage but fell again a few months later with DS whose now 14 months. Been trying 7 months this time and not even a sniff. Thought it would be like last time! Cycles are weird. Getting a short gap between ovulation and AF (spot 9dpo then AF usually 10dpo) so concerned that's the problem! Anyhow, although crap this thread exists it's nice to know I'm not alone!

Hi Trees, so pretty similar to me then (including the AF. I'm not in a good mood today, let me tell you). I also assumed it will happen immediately, had a spring baby planned!

Bobsy tell me more about soy - I can find threads on internet praising it, but have you found any reputable sources that tell us when and how much to take it? The advice seems to be all over the place.

When you get to 6 months ttc. Go to your Gp and ask for a day 21 progesterone test. You may have periods/positive ovulation tests and still not be producing mature enough eggs.

I've got the blood test booked as went to the GP last week! They said day 5 and day 21. How strict does that have to be? I've self diagnosed myself with low progesterone due to the spotting and short luteal phase!

Saw the info on soy on another thread so have ordered some! Feel like I've got to try something otherwise I'm going to go mad!

Welcome trees, I'm sorry about AF, but good that you got some test booked in.

I got my results today and everything looks normal apart from the progesterone, which was only 15.9. However, considering it was taken at the equivalent of day 15 and not day 21 I'm not sure whether that means anything or not?! My GP didn't order a repeat test but he has referred me to the gynae team at our local hospital. So now another waiting game begins! He couldn't say how long it would be until I get an appointment but probably "quite long", and he also said if it comes down to IVF or anything we might have to pay privately, but well cross that bridge if we come to it.

Soya Isoflavones are derived from soya beans. They have been dubbed “the natural Clomid,”
As they work in pretty much an identical manner.
Just like Clomid; Soya Isoflavones work by tricking your body into thinking its low on oestrogen. Your body then kick starts production of FSH (Follicle-stimulating hormone) followed by LH (Luteinizing hormone) Which are both necessary to release Healthy Eggs during ovulation.
FSH is released at the start of the menstrual cycle; it stimulates the growth of an immature egg into a fully matured egg. When the egg has matured your body then releases a surge of LH. LH is the hormone that tells the ovary to release the egg.

WHEN?
You take Soy Isoflavones, like Clomid, on either CD 1-5 , 2-6, 3-7 , 4-8 or 5-9.
If you take soy Isoflavones during the later time bracket, for example CD5-9, you shall strengthen the egg that has already started growing producing a healthier egg. The earlier in your cycle you take It, the higher your chance of releasing multiple eggs but these eggs will not be as mature as the eggs grown from taking Soya later.
A lot of women will choose the middle cycle (3 -7) allowing time for a strong and healthy egg to develop without erasing the chance of a second egg being developed and released.

1-5 = you produce more eggs, and ovulate sooner, with a stronger ovulation.

2-6 = you produce more eggs that usual, but not as many as taking it 1-5. Eggs may be more mature, and ovulation will be slightly more strong than 1-5.

3-7 = The best of both worlds, a few more eggs, and all eggs will be strong & mature, and ovulation will be alot stronger than 1-5.

4-8 = No more eggs will be produced, but the ones already there, will be matured alot more than usual, and ovulation will be very strong. Ovulation may only be brought forward a teeny bit.

5-9 = You'll have one very mature strong egg, from the ones you already produced on your own. Ovulation will either happen when it usually does, or a few days later, but your egg will be of great quality.

DOSE?
The dose is really down to you but you should always use the lowest amount that works for you.
With Clomid the starting dose is 100mg. Soya Isoflavones are said to be half the strength of Clomid, so it makes sense for the starting dose to be 100mg.
The trouble with 100mg of soya is that the capsules tend to come as 40mg. So you have a choice of starting at 80mg.
Some women change the dose on different days. So they may start at 120mg for the first 3 days then give an extra boost for the last 2 days with 160mg.

As I have said though, use the lowest dose possible for yourself. If you ovulate using 120mg/day stick to that for a few cycles. GIVE IT A CHANCE. It is said that it takes 3months to get the full benefits of what you are taking. NEVER EXCEED 200mg/day.

OTHER BENEFITS?
The following potential health benefits are attributed to Isoflavones:
Reduce heart disease risk
Protect against prostate problems
improve bone health
Reduce cancer risk

SIDE EFFECTS?
As with any medication, taking Soya Isoflavones may cause side effects such as:
Nausea
Headaches
Dizziness
Hot flushes
Night sweats
Cramping
Diarrhoea
Lack of fertile cm
Thrush
Obviously the higher the dose you take the higher your chance of experiencing side effects.

DO NOT TAKE SOYA ISOFLAVONES WITHOUT CONSULTING A DOCTOR IF YOU HAVE ANY OF THE FOLLOWING:
Breast cancer, hepatic disease, prostate cancer, kidney disease, taking hormone treatments, thyroid disease, and allergies to soy, peanuts or other legumes.
Soy Isoflavones should not be taken while breastfeeding or pregnant.
Soy Isoflavones may interact with the following medications; androstenedione, antibiotics, clomiphene, DHEA, contraceptives and other female hormones, finasteride, raloxifene, red clover, tamoxifen, testosterone and other male hormones, thyroid hormones, and toremifene.
NOTE: Just like Clomid, Soya Isoflavones may not help some women at all!
Although research carried out on FF has shown that 77% of women taking Soya Isoflavones on the stated days at the stated doses, got there BFP on their first cycle taking them.

I copied the above from another thread (hope I don't get in trouble for copywrite lol). I've looked on Internet & read about the cycle days to take but not read much in depth, I'm not sure of the original source of the above.

From reading these threads I'm finding that I don't know much about TTC. I don't understand Day 5 & Day 21 blood tests? Though I'm too old to have any tests. I might look on the Internet see if there are any fertility clinics that might help me.

metal glad your blood test results look normal. Hopefully you'll get your BFP before then. Did you say you'd taken the Soya Isoflavones?

Welcome Trees

So, from what I understood, the early (day 5 - think mine was 7) test looks to make sure that your LH and FSH are low - can indicate things like PCOS if they're not at that stage. Then the day 21 (which I think had to be a couple of days either side) looks at progesterone, which should be high at that point because you should be a week after ovulation. My cycles are 30 days, so they suggested doing 23 day for the second one. The GP mentioned something about menopause too, but I can't remember what (I think that one of the tests might give a different result if you were heading into early menopause, but I might be wrong there). Bobsy - really, you're not too old for tests. Age will not be helping you get pregnant, but you're younger than me and I've had these bloodtests and now been referred to the hospital - although not sure what for yet! See another GP sweetie - don't let those insensitive comments put you off. And go and tell DH you just need a cuddle. xx

Thanks for the information LittlePoot that's very interesting to know. My cycle are usually around 30-31 days. From what I've read further up I'm quite concerned I have a short lutuel phase, the cycle before last I started spotting at 10dpo of course I was daft enough to think it was implantation! My doctor never mentioned testing my progesterone. She's not asked me anything about my cycles or periods. I know I need to try & see someone else. Thanks for your support too xx

metal sounds like your getting good care from your gp sucks that you have to wait again, by the end of this we will all be pro's at waiting.

Hello trees sorry your here but welcome :)

bobsy definitely see another gp you deserve a better standard of care and from the sounds of it is available elsewhere.

I will take soy next cycle bobsy, I'm currently 5dpo.

And I agree with little, defo try and see a different GP. I first saw a really unsympathetic one last year, even though she was supposed to specialise in women's health, before finally finding one who took me seriously! This is just from my experience, but I find generally the younger GPs are far more helpful and willing to run tests than the older ones, who just seem to try and fob you off with "come back in x-amount of time if things haven't changed".

Hi trees welcome to the thread, I had a short LP when I was trying to conceive #1. I took high dose B vitamins, B100 from Solgar and had acupuncture and that helped extend it to about 12 days which is enough for implantation. I also had progesterone support in early pregnancy which really helped I think as I had early MCs without it. I seem to have a decent LP now but its not making any difference!!

bobsy your GP sounds totally useless sorry, the problem may well be your DH (50% of problems are male factor) or any number of issues. Age can be a factor but plenty of 38 year olds have no issues in the same way as some 28 year olds do! I would push for a referral or try and see someone privately if I were you!

metal depending on when you ovulated its possible that the progesterone was taken to early and did not have time to rise adequately (I think it peaks at 5-7dpo?)

I am loving all of the reasons to enjoy a bigger age gap. I do find myself checking out people's age gaps in the playground, how sad am I!
I am actually starting to think that having one child would not be so bad, DD is so delightful and easy at the moment, in a few years we could start to have some more adventurous holidays and travel a bit, we will never have the awful multiple wake ups newborn phase, the colicky evenings etc. So maybe its not so bad but who am I kidding? I want a baybeeee.

Have had a very odd old cycle this month, ovulated really early, day 6 I think. Had EWCM straight after AF and all the usual ovulations signs as well a high and peak fertility on cbfm. Managed to DTD on both days so who knows?

I don't want a baby really, but I want another child. And I can't even stand people putting up family photos on FB if they have kids with small age gaps, like a 2- and a 3-year old, or 3 and 5..
Interesting that I initially really wanted a girl, but now I'm more jealous of families who have 2 boys.

AF has certainly arrived here, nice birthday present, thanks. Have ordered some soy as well, let's see.

Luckily at least DH doesn't have any issues with getting checked out, actually offered himself. I have a friend who TTC for about 7 years, husband refused to go get checked, and when he finally did, yes it was his problem all along. So selfish.

Thanks farfalla that's what I thought, the bloods were done at 1dpo so obviously the levels would be lower than at 7dpo even if I am ovulating properly, right? I've asked the GP to ring me back and will push for a repeat test this week.

Sorry about AF hazle, but happy birthday!

We always wanted a fairly large age gap, in fact until DD was around 2.5 I was pretty convinced I'd never want another! My BIL and SIL have two 18 months apart and I honestly don't know how anyone does that, it would have finished me off (but then I did have PND). Anyway, I'm just trying to look at the bigger picture now; yes they might not have much in common as kids, but when they're older it won't matter so much. I have lots of good friends now who are 5,6,7,8 years older than me. On the flipside, there's only 2 years between me and my brother and we're not very close, even though I do love him and we do get on.

In our case, the small gap would be better as my DH is a SAHD, and would be better for us to get the baby years over with, so he can concentrate on his career again. Not to start again, then stop for the next baby. But of course, we'll manage either way. It's terribly annoying though when things don't work out the way I planned.

Whenever I click on Active Conversations, the Antenatal "Any June mums to be?" thread keeps popping up. Makes me want to go and post "No! Not here! Would you stop asking?!?"

Ha ha - me too Hazle!! Bugger off! x

I'm just worried another GP within the same surgery will make me feel stupid again by saying it's my age, I do think you're right I could do to see someone else and hope that they do help and not just say it's my age, I also know that we don't DTD enough even though we do manage at least once at time of ovulation. When I read what tests everyone else is having it has made me realise how unhelpful my GP has been. If we had the money I would go private.

Metal I couldn't remember if you said you'd already taken the soy, but if everything that I copied from a previous thread is correct then maybe we'll all get our much waited for BFP's by taking them.

HazleNutt Happy Birthday, AF sure picks her times but I hope you manage to have a good birthday. I've had to delete people off FB who've had their second when their first is much younger than mine as I got so fed up of all the pics of their children with their 'perfect' age gaps, it's only people that I don't talk to anymore so I thought what's the point in having them on there anyway.

That is really selfish of your friends husband! I might press the subject with my OH again, the problem also is we're at separate doctors as he has never moved himself to our local doctors when we moved house over 2 and half years ago.

OH is also annoying me again with his 'you will get pregnant' he totally doesn't get it!

I got fed up today when I noticed one of the mum's who has a little boy at my DD's pre-school is pregnant! She already has a baby as well who can't be a year old yet. There are fertile people everywhere I go at the moment.

Bobsy, any chance that woman is just fat?

But yes, your OH has to go get tested as well, it could just as easily be him.

Bobsy can you change surgeries? I was dismissed by several GPs at my old practice when I went to them about DS being an unsettled newborn. Changed practices and the first GP I saw diagnosed reflux and sorted him out. Couldn't have been more different and now they are being supportive with TTC #2. Thanks for the info on the soy. Mines been dispatched so will be taking shortly!

Anyhow heard about Maca? The lady in the health food shop recommended it to me as an aid to fertility too. Might give that a go too as there seems to be nothing to loose at the mo!! Far - I've tried everything to get my LP to extend, reflexology/b6/b complex/vitex but nothing seems to help. This month it was 8 days long! Stupidly I think the spotting I get is implantation but it's always bloody AF!!

I've got a kidney condition which is lovely and stable at the moment but that's adding to the pressure of trying to have #2. Although I'm trying to be positive about a bigger age gap, especially as DS was a nightmare newborn. I would happily be delivered a 1yo!! But equally I'm slightly terrified it's never going to happen.

Ps Happy Birthday Hazel !

She could be knowing my imagination for thinking people are pregnant! However it did look more baby bump than fat.

Really going to have to stop this obsession with other people's pregnancies or non pregnancies as the case may be!

Yes I know it could be him & I will have another word about getting himself tested.

Trees I'm not sure whether I can changed surgeries as you have to live in the area, I might look in to it. I wish I could go back to my old doctors but I'm definitely out of the catchment area since I moved house. It must have been a relief to find someone to take you seriously over your DS.

Not heard of Maca might have to give that a go too, why not I've tried everything else. I'm on Trying for a baby tablets, vitamin B, I've had Reflexology, I've tried positive thinking ie writing down positive thoughts about having a baby, & now I've taken soya Isoflavones. I do that every month think the first couple of days of spotting is implantation.

Good that your kidney condition is stable. I'm trying to find positives about the age gap too & tbh DD can be a handful sometimes I'm not sure I could have coped with a newborn when she was a toddler. I also worry its never going to happen.

I think I'm going to ov earlier this cycle as I've had EWCM on CD14 so I will start testing with the OPK's tomorrow.

Oh god my cousin in law is having twins, bless my husband he knew a while ago and didn't tell me but we have the in-laws staying at the moment and they told me. I think they were probably trying to not so subtly hint that they would like another grandchild.

Guilt, guilt, irrational anger and a little bit more guilt and I was doing so well this week

happy birthday Hazle hope you managed to have a relaxing time.

I love the baby bit, it's like portable hugs all the time :) but DS was an easy baby keep thinking that means no#2 will be a nightmare !!