The Berries: Projecting the sausage signal and chasing rainbows whilst chanting FUFC in the hunt for that elusive BFP (thread 19)

[happylass]

The smallprint –
Berries have a strict entrance criteria (TTC #1, over 30, TTC for 12+months, NO instadiffers, must have a special pot and def no mention of baby dust or baby dancing UGH !!! Ooooh aren’t we strict!

Yes, where is otters?

parsley thanks. Not sure if it's too casual? Wonder if it looks like an expensive version of a dress you'd go to a picnic in? My weddings not formal - basically registry office and then posh pub for late lunch and a boogie into the night..

feather it's all in the accessories! How are you wearing your hair? I had mine up in a low messy side bun thing and went for a pretty enormous glam vintage style hair slide and got some matching bracelets (for non ring arm).
I do think it's important you feel comfortable and confident in whatever dress you choose, don't let the timescales terrify you if you're not happy!

Feather that dress is beautiful, especially for a low key wedding.

Thanks everyone, Barking that's the reason I gave her choosing iui, that it will help me ov and monitor me etc which I felt was going to be a much higher chance than me trying alone, you put it so much better than me though! She still then said that this fc's results were less than 10%. I think I'll still try it anyway though as I think it's worth it.

Re the googling, I know I shouldn't but I've been given very little info on adenomyosis so that was the reason. The study I found was recent and showed that women who have it have a much less chance of IVF working and also sustaining the pregnancy than those who didn't.

Anyway, Feather that dress is also lovely! You gonna go to the JP sample sale? Organising a wedding is so hard when work is super full on too. I agree with Parsley re accessories and hair.

nolly have an amazing holiday!

Happy finally you are on holidays! Have you got much planned for your time off? You have tons of time left for organising your wedding!

Just waiting for my mates...15 mins late so far although this is not unusual. I'm always early, I never learn. The pub is crawling with kids...

feather dress is lovely. I like your taste!

Thanks guys! And good luck to all on the 2ww x

Hello everyone, just had a lovely lunch out with two friends and their little babies, one 1 year old and one 8 mths. They were very good on the whole and although I thought I should kidnap a child to save me being odd one out it was really lovely.

Had to dodge a question about Ivf with friend who knows we've been trying. She asked was there any change and what we decided to do. Honouring the stum pact between husband and I, I just said we had a few other things to try and that we're trying not to worry too much about it. Told her about next door neighbour's pg news and how it seemed it was a real one upmanship with new car, baby announcement and expensive holiday ( flash fuckers!) and bless her she said that's probably the only three nice things that have happened to them whereas we have lots of lovely things. She also joked when I said about hearing the baby cry through the wall to wait til theirs is older and sleeping then have mine going through the sleepless nights!

I saw my other friend with one year old last night and stayed over, it was a bit of an eye opener as regards sleeping and having him wake up and cry and being woken yourself. Also my friend was saying that you can feel trapped in your own house of an evening as once they've gone to bed that's it, you can't go anywhere. She was also talking about what a big strain it puts on your relationship, she said it's like having an alien thrown into your relationship. So much for stupid people having babies to show their love or 'heal' their relationship!! So yes have got to see the real hard work side of things,sometimes I wonder what am I getting myself so upset over!!

Bushy that is true and tbh I often have traitorous thoughts about how nice my life is without DC even though I'd be beyond gutted if someone told me that in a year I'd still be un-pg!

Today DH and I took out a loan to do house improvements - big big scary step for me as I am dead against borrowing money but we have water coming in so if we don't do these soon, it will cause real damage and we can't save fast enough to do them under our own steam. We are going on full austerity to overpay as fast as poss but I caught myself thinking, shit, can I afford a baby now?

But then we got the bag of cheap syringes deluxe fertility kit today and I can feel a little flutter of excitement....... Roll on next weekend!

Still cannot believe I will be doing artificial insemination in PIL spare bedroom

Good luck RP!!

Feather... the dress is really beautiful. I watched the video too and I like the way it swishes!

Happy- grrr to dp being away during shag week. Do these men know that lives are planned around a few days each month and it is vitally important that they put their lives on hold too! My dh is going on a course for 3 days in June so will be away from home. I'm not sure of the dates yet but I'm already annoyed incase it impacts on shag week!!

Beaky push push push for the IUI!!

Barking have a fantabulous honeymoon and Nolly (welcome!!) have a great time in Oz).

I've been reading more about this Factor V Leiden. I'm so so worried that I will just continue to have miscarriages. I read some research earlier that says that if you have this condition and have had recurrent miscarriages (1 more of these to go for me before I am classed in this category), then you only have around a 40% chance of ever having a live birth!! Thats very low! I also realised that options like IUI /IVF will never be able to help me as my stupid blood will always have the same problem.
I feel very bitter that getting a bfp is not going to be the difficult bit here. The whole pregnancy (if it ever happens) will be full of risk and feelings of terror. Why do some women have it all so easy? Why is it fair that not only is conceiving not as easy as it should be, that even after that happens then a pregnancy can never be enjoyed.

Funky... Are there treatments available if you do get pg? Could you use a surrogate to carry a baby that was genetically yours and DH's?

Sorry if that is cold I just always think of the practical solution!

It's just to try blood thinners. As far as I know that's all they can do. Heparin injections next time to see if that helps, if not then I guess it's try again. From what I understand they might induce me so stopping heparin in advance of labour can be planned as much as possible. Here's me assuming I'll be getting diffed again at all!!

Not sure what I think on the surrogate thing. Haven't thought about that and am hoping it won't come to that!

Also pissed off tonight as after a cracking effort of 5 out of 7 nights on shag week I've only gone and got a bloody awful uti. I have no idea how or if that affects conception/implantation, but I'm now on antibiotics too. I'm guessing uti + medication can not be a positive thing to happen anyway at this time of the cycle!

Sorry to be all me, me, me tonight! Myinstadiffer friend who is due next month has been texting me this evening so I think I' just feeling extra sorry for myself.

Ps... Barking, get you being all firmly on the YBR! Good on you!

Funky UTIs are shit but a friend of mine had one right at the start of a pg and it made no difference so hopefully won't for you.

The surrogate thing is something I always think about ever since I saw a programme about a woman who does it. It was really fascinating. My DSis may not be able to have children and I have always said I'd consider doing it for her, if I were able to.

Sounds like you are having a rough night though. Can you do something nice tomorrow?

bushy there's always an undercurrent of those feelings here too, but the desire for DC is stronger. Rhyme over reason!

rp oooh sexaaay! You'll have to tell us how it all goes next weekend, I am morbidly fascinated by the whole idea and might use it myself next month when at my sisters if needed

funky has anyone at your FC talked you through the options properly yet? Google is a scary scary place when it comes to medical stuff.

tiger how did lunch go?

I am watching Britpop At The BBC on iPlayer - nostalgia central! Brett Anderson sort of reminds me of Demi Moore/that French actress lady. Watching it has made me wonder what I'd say to my 15 year old self if I could meet her now. Don't try to cut your hair like Natalie Imbruglia - you'll look like a tit, there's a start....

Aww Parsley, did you style your hair to look like her?! I wanted to be her ever since she was Beth in Neighbours! Or Annalise. I loved Annalise too!

RP- yes do tell us about the... a'hem basting of your nether regions. I am also intrigued, but feel free to leave out some of the information!

Parsley, I have an appt on 13th May. This is because I want to discuss the diagnosis that they gave me half of back in October. This appt wouldn't be happening had I not kept ringing and ringing the clinic and pestering the nurse as to what was going on. Ever since October she has been telling me it was just a mild thing on my screen but yes I definitely have thrombophilia. When I say, "what type" she always says "it's just a slight thing. Very mild". I just wish she had admitted that she didn't have a clue what to tell me or how to manage me and told me to see the consultant sooner. Could also have maybe saved the baby I lost in December if a plan had been in place and the nurse had been properly informed of what was happening with me (I have been dealing with the same nurse all along).

Is everyone having a relaxing evening? I miss Boodle streaking around Berry HQ on a Saturday night.

Oh funky how frustrating, there are enough hurdles for us all to jump without the people who are supposed to be the experts getting in the way too. Hope your appt comes around quickly so you can get some proper info.

Not up to much at all this eve. Broke my wheat free fast this eve with a bowl of Oreo ice cream (I should've made MrP finish it, it's been calling to me for two weeks!). I also just totally let the ttc side down by downing my cocktail of supplements with a beer instead of water, and at 9DPO too. Terrible!

I hope you're alright boodle . I'd offer to do some substitute streaking but after the ice cream and beer I don't think anyone wants to see my tubby guts!

Funky, I'm so sorry. That nurse would give me the fucking rage!! I didn't realise the mc was connected to your condition. Yes you need to speak to someone who knows what they are talking about. Have you considered complaining?

On a totally separate note, I now want Oreo ice cream. Thanks a bunch

I wouldn't feel too guilty Parsley. I'm sure a little treat is ok, especially at a weekend and I reckon a beer is ok too! Oreo ice cream sounds delicious! Love Oreo's.

RP, potentially the miscarriages are not related to the thrombophilia. They don't know and have just said it could just be one of those things. 2 mc in a row is not too usual though unless there's some kind of problem I don't think!! So... what's the plan for the artificial insemination? What day is the fun kicking off?

Ah right. Still annoying of the nurse to palm you off!

Dtd prob Tues, then baster action prob Thurs and Sat. Will prob OV around Thurs or Fri so trying to time it right!

I imagine it is one of those things that will take a month or two to get the knack of.

Am I a Berry pioneer, does anyone know?

I think you are RP!

Just checking in. So very, very glad to be on half term but worried that I'm going to spend the time driving myself crazy. Manlump has lots of work on so no chance of any holiday or anything like that.

Barking - hope you have a fantastic honeymoon. About time for some good news in Berry HQ; seems like we're all getting a bit of a rough ride at the moment.

RP one of the ex berries (an original) tried the Turkey Baster quite regularly so don't feel alone! I'm v pleased your DH has finally agreed to it

Merk I was just thinking the same thing. Was it our resident name changer?

Morning all! Did something naughty last night and drank several glasses of cava at a friends' house. I'm 7dpo and don't feel so clever now. facepalm - when will I ever learn! parsley* we can go sit in the boozy corner of shame together if you like - just bring the ice cream with you.

funky can't remember what area you live in, and I'm sure you've done your research, but would you ever consider going to see Dr Shehata at the Miscarriage Clinic in Harley street? There is a bit of controversy around him, but if you can ignore that, then he does get a lot of women to stay pregnant in a way that no one else does. www.miscarriageclinic.co.uk

I sound like I work for him, but I don't! But I know several people that have suffered recurrent (one of them 7 times due to a blood disorder) and have gone on to have healthy babies because of him.

Hi everyone else!

boodle! How you doing?

rp sounds a plan! Hope you didn't think I was being mean when I posted the actual Amazon turkey baster link - it was a clutzy attempt at being funny. (Although I know a lesbian couple who had a baby with their male best friend and they used an actual turkey baster - she got preg on the first go and their child is now 12!)

Sunny Sunday morning with a hangover. It's mornings like these that I (guiltily) feel ok about not having a baby. Freeeeeedoooooom!

Feather of course not it was funny.

Also nice to hear that other people on the thread have got pg this way, and I am not just some kind of weirdo making DH whack off in his parents' spare room!!