Hi guys, felling really crap and it's not because it's Mother's Day, ( I always just associate it with being thankful for my own lovely mum and not my own lack of motherhood). Just got back from nice walk with my parents, having cooked them a Sunday lunch et al and dh told me to guess who's pg, it's only our bloody neighbours, the ones that share our wall. My first reaction was I hope they move!! I'm the one who's going to have to listen to their baby crying through the wall, when it should be ours and believe me we'll be able to hear it, as we can hear the baby making action!
Dh was talking to the bloke who's saying he's going to have to get a new car and talking about getting a BMW or Audi. Think dh is more upset about the bloke getting a new car as he's had the same cheap one for years and would love a new car.... Arr he just came in and interrupted my crying and said that it was both he was upset about. I also said this baby is due in July, who goes on summer holidays for 6 weeks and will have to listen to it and put up with it.. Me. He was really sweet and said well you might be pregnant then too, we're on our drugs, we're doing our thing, we can't be bitter about.
In my down times I feel a bit left behind, think dh does too. Still I nastily make myself feel better thinking they're the ones that'll have the strain on their relationship, no sleep, stress etc, my dh is like stop it you had me convinced with this baby stuff and now you're turning me off it. ( my fault I was reading the thread are you happier before or after children, and the comments on being ground down etc were in my mind!) I think, in my pessimistic frame of mind, the thing is they're right next door, we may never have children and we'll have to watch and hear this one grow up and any subsequent ones they have. It's just going to be a painful reminder of here's what you could have won. But what am I saying that I want to live in an adults only world, no kids allowed? It's just daft, but it's just another reminder of things not being fair, a bit like barking and her pg honeymoon friend, you just can't get away from it. I can deal with cousin, sister in law, close friend, work colleague all being pg/ having babies as I can shut off from them but this is next door. Still, I am dramatising, it's not like we're close and for goodness sake they're pleasant enough people and I can't control who does or who doesn't have children near to me... But gah it's a thin semi detached wall away. Dh said he was down earlier, but that he's dealt with it now and got it straight in his head. I will too but thank god for this forum, I really am so, so, glad I stumbled across you ladies, I know you will understand and if I'm being unreasonable tell me.
I now have to do lesson planning to drive home the gloom even further. Might just have to be a cursory nod then drown my sorrows in the last glass of Sauvignon left over from lunch. Think I really need nice holiday to look forward to, just dropped or basically told dh that when he has time off round Easter that a day out or whatever that he sorts would be most appreciated.
Oh, also soo glad I'm not on fb, from reading what you guys are saying, is it full of self congratulatory look what I got for Mother's Day crap?