Karma's a load of old shite! The BESH have gone through a fair old heap of bollocks lately so it's time we had some good news!

[Fabuluce]

In order to join the BESH you MUST be over 30 and TTC for baybee no. 1 for over a year, be ok with swearing, shout CUNT at the world on a daily basis and howling at the moon should be a regular occurrence. BESHtionnaires must be submitted - no admittance allowed without it (we just want to snigger at your lesbian crush - it's true).

Revised BESHtionnare for reference

1. Do you like gin? (This is compulsory, you must say 'Yes')

2. Men - are you a gold digger or a cradle snatching cougar?

3. Baybee-making - to put a baybee in your tumtum, which hole do you use:
   a) weewee
   b) poopoo
   c) foofoo
   d) none, you just pray to the baby Jebus.

4. Testing - when someone wonders if they should test for updiff (pg), do you:
   a) bellow 'POAS!' at them non-stop and punch them repeatedly in the kidneys till they wet themselves anyway.
   b) Sprinkle them with babydust and send them hugs and kisses on lickle baby angel wings.

5. Is R2D2:
   a) an adorable robot from Star Wars.
   b) the source of all evil.

6. Number of pets?

7. Inappropriate (read: weird) crush of shame?

8. Lesbian crush?

9. How much money have you spent on sticks you then urinate on?
   a) Oh nothing, I'll probably catch first time and then get the doctor to confirm it.
   b) Over 100 quid
   c) I opened an account on ebay solely for the purpose of purchasing sticks

10. Which of these sentences is appalling:
    a) Off to see the consultant today!!! So excited!!!!!
    b) Gud luck hun sprinkling babydust for ya lol xxx
    c) both of the above

11. How barren are you?
    a) childless and TTC for at least one year
    b) one child and TTC #2 for at least two years
    c) I've been trying for 2 cycles and the wait is driving me mad!

If (c) then the BESH is not the thread for you.

Whoop! Whoop! .

Must have been AMAZING!

Time to get the cunt bunting out and neck gin from tea cups! Whoop bugs congrats you PESH you, what a relief!

Woohoo! I've had such a crummy day this is exactly what I wanted to read!

Slides in on with expensive gin in one hand and cunt bunting trailing out the other jiggling nipples for all her might. Well done Buglet!!!! This is fabulous news!!!

Hags I'm shagged! I've spent all day looking after our two nephews today - it's been great fun but bloomin knackering! They are wonderful though downside is I got to hang out with a gazillion mums and their sprogs and a whole bunch of diffed. Sigh. I was looking at them all and they looked late 20's, early 30's at most. I'm just too old aren't I

Having insomnia as a pg symptom bugs or just up 'til the early hours showing those young whippersnappers how to paaaaaartay?

I've got to pack!!! Pronto!!! Rain forecast for the next 10 days in NZ... Might have to adjust my packing list!

Quick qu - I was going to ditch the temping and opks this cycle and just shag lots and enjoy the honeymoon, but now there's the potential of IUI next cycle, I want to know when I O so I can predict better when AF will arrive (especially as it might be over the may bank holiday weekend and they may not be open for day 2 bloods and scans given they're not open on sundays).
Am I crazy? Should I just chill out and leave it all at home?

barking I'd probably leave it behind bit you do have good reason to track - that said lots of people probably turn up for these appts without that info so maybe it won't really matter? Entirely up to you, main thing is that you enjoy the 'moon!

bugs no wonder - I'd be the same! Time to start enjoying your pg

I have had night sweats last 2 nights and if I jiggle my boobs especially vigorously they hurt. Def pg right?
I think the droid will be here on Weds/Thu but this cycle is so screwy I have no idea.

At least it's the right sort of laying awake and getting excited bugs. These are amazing times for you, you're allowed to feel a bit giddy and in awe at what's going on!

Barking I see where you're coming from. I think I'd rather know and would want to carry on temping so long as ROCH didn't have a hissy fit over it but then do you need the extra ball ache on your holiday of a lifetime? Tough one! I struggle with the whole 'gay abandon' concept anyway though; I'm always looking ahead to be prepared for the next thing. even after reading the book on Mindfulness and promising myself I could benefit from some of that

Step away from the pee sticks Pars.
Sounds like quite a day you had Fab. Damn the diffed and the young mums, your time will come.

Today I will mostly be suiting myself and having an indulgent day with my horse and some good friends and not a child in sight. It shall be bliss!

Honestly barking I'd leave it. Flying with a massive time difference is likely to throw your temps into confusion anyway. I'd just do plenty of sechsing and see what happens. Possibly do the OPKs if it's not too much pressure for you.

bugs ever since I upgraded my iphone settings the new keyboard is driving me mad!

Frog I'd leave it too - I'm sure you know exactly what your cycle does, which day you're in etc which is all they'll really ask for - agree that an opk or toe would probably not go amiss if you don't know when you ovulate - I can feel my tricksy buggers go so don't need them but if you don't have that particular joy then opk away so you'll have all the info you need. Other than that just go enjoy yourself lovely . You'll probably get diffed through the sheer joy of honeymooning!

Bugs that's lovely to hear

Cherry have fun with your chum and your horse what bliss!

Well, I've just finished packing and I have no room. I'm not taking the thermometer or the opks, having a cycle off . I think all the chinese herbs and vitamins I've packed are enough.... Going off the last cycle I can assume I will Ov somewhere around cd17 ish. But will just go for the maximum shagging in a campervan technique. Could be my last ever chance of a natural diff!
Going to stick with the wheat free as much as possible while I'm away though. I want to give myself the best possible chance to balance out the hormones!!!

See you later hagz!

Bon voyage barking!

So far my weekend seems to mainly consist of procrastinating and MN. I should go and get started on painting the utility room doors. FUN! Tomorrow we're going for a bike ride (AKA excuse to go for a pub lunch).

bugs autocorrect is sometimes hilarious, mostly annoying. You ever seen www.damnyouautocorrect.com?

Happy mooning barking get that shagging wagon on the road!

Have a fabulous Moon Frog!!!

Well I'm back in thankfully - had a right panic on when I could login last night but all is well with the world again - phew.

I went to see Justin Timberlake last night - 20 rows from the front and an amazing show! He is one sexy Mofo!!!

Parsley I love damn you autocorrect - it has me crying and snorting with laughter every time. Vulva!!

Come? Get your my mind out of the gutter bugs!

It's beaut here too, we're going for a bike adventure today, hopefully involving yummy food but no well, maybe one beer. I took my supplements with beer last night, in the 2ww. Tsk tsk!

Enjoy the sunshine hags!

Dammit Bugs I think it's about time you shagged then! Just think of Justin...in fact, why not worship at the church of loving and jump your husb instead

He was fabulous, just fabulous. Sigh.

Right time for me to crawl out of bed and leave the slumbering TWH do that I can make a key lime pie - we're off to friends for a BBQ lunch today in the sun seems a perfect day for it.