martie this is the place to moan! Nobody minds, we all do it -- it's powerful therapy, actually. Don't be afraid of the doctor. I wish I'd gone sooner. You can only plan so much before you drive yourself mad. Just live your life to the fullest, dealing with with each day as it comes. Despite my fleeting desire to throw in the towel (which I won't do!) I'm a big believer in positive thinking: You'll always have as much money as you need, yada yada.
My craptastic week started off with putting out a ton of fires at work; we just finished a big project, and that always means last minute garbage tasks and unexpected problems. All told, it was a successful launch, but I have many more gray hairs than I did beforehand. Especially because I come home at night and have to listen to my poor DH moan about how much he hates his job and idiot boss. He has another offer on the table, but he's nervous about taking it -- it's for a university that he has worked for in the past for many years, so in some way it's familiar and a bit like going home. But he left there for specific reasons and is afraid that the things that drove him away may not have changed as much as they assure him they have. Plus, the insurance he has now is incredible and has covered most of our fertility treatments. I can't stand to see him stay someplace he's miserable though, just because our stupid eggs and sperm can't do what their supposed to. It's a tough situation to be in and no decision is made.
With all that on my mind, I was really excited for my acupuncture appointment Wednesday. Naturally, I was running late and, in my haste, I left my purse on my desk. I didn't realize this, of course, until I was pulling up at the clinic a full ONE HOUR drive away. So I had no money, no ID, and not even enough gas in the car to get home afterward. Totally counterproductive to what was supposed to be a stress-relief experience!
The appointment was very good (more on that later) - and I even found a $5 bill in my coat pocket for gas so I thought my luck had turned....until I got pulled over! It was my own fault, I was looking down at my cell phone at a red light, which is a huge no-no. The officer was really snotty to me, but in reality it could have been much worse. He did not ticket me for not having my license or any of my other paperwork. He did give me a ticket for the cell phone though, which I'm sure will cost me a fortune. Ah well. That was all forgotten as small beans when I got the phone call about the embryos yesterday. Sigh.
I am feeling better about everything now, though. I chose to work from home today so I wouldn't have to interface much. I had a nice lunch with my girlfriend down the street who was also working from home; she struggled to get pregnant with her daughter, who just turned 1, so she "gets it" -- I can say things to her that I can otherwise say only to you all! She understands my utter rage at finding out that someone on my staff is pregnant (as much as I love her and am happy for her, I'm selfishly thinking about how it is going to impact me if and when I go out on maternity leave). So I got a lot off my chest. I can only move forward from here. There is no backward.