Drop all things contraband, we don't want you're OPK's here. Grab a cape, stroke the unicorn and reserve your spot in the pity Jacuzzi...It's JUST SHAGGING THREAD 21!!

[lil1ady]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others.

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in!

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession.

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture!

The link to Part 20 is <a class="break-all" href="//www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/1961521-You-can-do-it-by-charting-analysing-testing-and-worrying-but-we-prefer-JUST-SHAGGING-PART-20?" target="_blank">here</a>

The current Grads Fred is <a class="break-all" href="//www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/1817751-Just-Shagging-Grads-Fred-8-Roll-up-roll-up-all-Viroids-welcome" target="_blank">here</a>

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is <a class="break-all" href="//www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/health-news/the-dark-side-of-mumsnet-my-shocking-tour-of-the-websites-nether-regions-8905055.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">here</a> <img loading="lazy" class="inline-flex mumsnet-emoji" alt="Grin" src="https://www.mumsnet.com/build/assets/grin-D7Eg_B6y.png">

Happy shagging shaggers!

Damn those super fertile work colleagues!!

Ah bless your DH Dulcet - was there anything salvageable to eat? Do you have dogs? When anything like that happens in our house, our dogs think it's Christmas! We visited DMiL's house a while ago and she dropped a massive pot of yoghurt which exploded all over the floor (thankfully tiles!). My two dogs were in seventh heaven for a good 10 mins diligently cleaning it up!

DP has just come home to eat lunch with me (he works nearby) so he has cheered me up briefly by acting as a sounding board for my dramas.

Oh well, on a positive side, at least it takes the mind off ttc eh!!

Congrats scoob!!

Hope everyone else is well, been away for a few days with OH in the land of no internetz! Nice to relax though and have plenty of coffee, booze and other generally fertility unfriendly stuff!! Oh well.. x

I think I've moved from ttc obsession to the equivalent of self harm. obem followed by call the midwife catch up this afternoon, and from next week I'm going to be looking after a toddler 1 day a week!

The toddler might help put you off a bit? :-p

I can't go near OBEM this time.

no, he's uber cute!

Ah rubbish!

I'm watching Crufts. If I can't do babies I'm having more dogs!!! Haha...

I don't do dogs. I'll keep trying for a baby!

Who's the toddler Lil? I don't do dogs either. Far too much cleaning up involved.

Also don't really get OBEM. Found it a bit dull, but only seen it once. Is it worth giving it another try?

The only salvageable thing was the sides really - veg and cous cous. All the meat was on the floor and no dogs around. Two cats though but it wasn't cooked so we didn't risk it!

Used to make me ball my eyes out way before ttc was even though of!! So just avoid it now. Once you've seen one episode you've seen them all though I guess.

toddler is my nephew. my very cute super adorable about to be a big brother makes me jealous of my brother nephew!

i love obem. makes me feel warm and fuzzy and go ahhh. perhaps with a pang of "hmmm maybe one day" lately but I still love it.

I love OBEM too! No tears usually, heart of stone.

Terrible nights sleep here, been up about four times and now wide awake at 6.30am. Can't do that in the week when I need to!

Also, have PIAL (mines a lid). Am yet to dunk, someone talk me down!! min - help me keep my Monday promise!!

It'd be a shame to waste that lovely FMU...

dulcet sista do it! to put your mind at ease. Really, it's pointless waiting for me. I know I iced late and didn't bump uglies so I'm just waiting for her x
Seriously, POAS POAS POAS!
And immediately come here and share.

haha. You guys are no help at all! I've had to come downstairs and bake to take my mind off it all!

I just need to tip it away... but going back near it is a risk! Only got two IC in the drawer I think!

Just dunk it girl. Put your mind at rest, then you can bake with a happy head x

Haha this was the worst place to come to be talked down Dulcet. I'm actually going to be a party pooper and say if you think there's a strong chance of it being negative just because it's too early, then you should wait until Monday. But if it's quite likely to show a positive then you might as well go for it. I also had a terrible night's sleep.

Aw that's nice of you to have him once a week Lil. Wish my sister lived a bit closer although then she would make me babysit constantly

dulcet tip it away if its too early. wait until the witch is due. you'll only be glum if its bfn and too early telling yourself other ppl get them early and if it turned to be bfp Monday yd have caused yourself heartache for nothing. keep the hope alive a little longer!
can I come over to sample the baking?
thanks wil my sil doesn't have great health ATM. she works 2days a week and she needs a day to rest without him to look after. they were going to put him in nursery for an extra day but obviously that costs, so as I'm not that busy ATM I've offered to do it as long as I can. they are the type who won't ask for help. you have to offer something specific! I've said for a while if she needs me to have him any time let me know, then she said about putting him in nursery an extra day. I was like uh hello! lol

Yep I'm with Lil! No need for self torture ;-)

Step away, Dulcet! Don't do it to yourself love x

You only have a couple of days to go, you can do this!

Oh, I didn't realise you weren't late yet. In that case, yes, hold on for a wee (get it) while longer.
You CAN do this x

congrats furry!!

hangover city here today. I know I should have been behaving and being a grown up but I thought fuck it and got pissed on cocktails last night. Girls night out got messy.

Apparently we are all in trouble with our OH's. oops

Congratulations furryscoob! What a roll this thread is on!

Hope that head isn't aching too much ayles plus it's good practice for when you get your BFP. I feel like total shit today. Bleh.

What did you do in the end dulcet?

Sorry for the delay! Of course I dunked, with the only IC left in the house. Not a sniff. I am 2 days late if I just look at numbers but I think I am due today based on when I actually ov but that would only be 10dpo so still possibly too early. Time will tell one way or another!

What a beautiful day! Unless any of you are in Scotland...

Me too Juniper. I've actually come back to bed.

Ha ha sounds like a good night out aylesbury. Not had a big night out in longer than I can remember. What did you do to get you into trouble with OH? Sounds like scandal!