All that she wants is A baby! The Berries searching for the 'sign' but never symptom spotting (honest), possibly using a vagina jack and trying to get a FUFC before boarding the IVF train (thread 18)

[Bunnygirlie]

The smallprint –
Berries have a strict entrance criteria (TTC #1, over 30, TTC for 12+months, NO instadiffers, must have a special pot and def no mention of baby dust or baby dancing UGH !!! Ooooh aren’t we strict!

I'm with you on the ttc and jobs dilemma too. I changed jobs for one with a better work life balance and 5 minutes from home (instead of travelling and l

Oops....over eagerly pressed send!

...and long hours. Now I'm bored as hell and miss my old job. On the plus side though, I do have so much more free time and less stress. I didn't think for a minute I'd still not have a baby or be pg after 15 months ttc.

Yep, no one signs up for long-term ttc do they? 'Tis the bloody pits.

Anyhoo, you've all convinced me to give the interview a really bloody good shot. I was at a conference today in the part of town where the new job would be and I forgot how lovely and vibrant and fun it was. So I'm more excited about the interview now and hoping that I get an ironic bfp a few days after an offer!

Gorgeous firbabies Pipbin and Parsley, I looked through the pictures on my phone this morning and realised they are mostly of my cat . She's totally, absolutely not my pretend baby. Oh no.

otters - I figure we only need to start worrying when we're dressing them up in bonnets and parading them around in pushchairs.

I managed to rally quite well this morning and even gave pg team member a pep talk about ensuring she negotiates on maternity policy (it just the statutory at the mo as it's never been used!). I had all these plans to show how a generous mat policy would help strengthen our family friendliness and improve return to work rates/productivity, but she's going to have to pick that baton up now. Good the hard work will be out of the way in time for my BFP.....
She's also assured me there will be no cooing or fuss (luckily she hates attention) so feeling a bit better about the whole thing now.

Hope everyone's having a good Wednesday!

Glad you're feeling brighter about it all Parsley, and I'm not far off dressing the cat up and taking her for a walk!

Anyone else annoyed that the MN 'Blog of the Day' feature on the right of the screen is a fucking scan picture? Just me then

And now I've just read the blog and feel like a right cow. Ignore me, I'm having one of those days.

As if by magic, AF appears. :(

Ah well, onto the next cycle.

Goodness me, I hardly know any of the names here now.
Are there any of the old guard left, or am I the only original berry here now?

Hey Pip, glad to see you back. How you doing? What's next for you?
Boodle is still around (just) as are Happy & Barking. Think that's it for old school berries as the grads chopper is rapidly claiming them all...there's a seat with your name on it ready for you

Yep we're waiting for you Pip!

Ahem, Ahem. Yes Pip I'm very sadly still here and very much in the running for last Berry standing. Lots of lovely new faces recently though so not empty in HQ despite the mass exodus towards the chopper. What's happening with you lady? Are you starting IVF again soon?

At the moment I can't think of anything until I've got rid of this dreadful thrush. I've taken the tablet and a pessary but it just won't shift.
I can start IVF again in April but I want to leave it a little longer so I can lose weight first. Which I am failing to do.

pip! I'm still here. I guess I'm sort of new old guard. Believe it was you who recruited me to the berries last summer. hope you're well. We can be thrush buddies - I'm suffering terribly after my hsg. Eating buckets of yoghurt but looks like I'll have to look up Mr Canestan soon

merk any day now?? Exciting!

I'm standing here with the berries too. CD29, BFN yesterday as I wanted to reward myself for a long day at work with a glass of wine, PMS just about killing me. And a good all crying spell of why oh why can't I just get pregnant. The overachiever in me is feeling very underachieving in the reproductive department.

pip what's your weight loss strategy? I am also hoping to shift a few pounds - no IVF on the horizon for me (yet!) but I figure it's better to be healthy as I can be. Sorry you're still suffering too feather - hopefully both of you are cleared up soon.

merk you graduated well before I joined this lovely lot but 'one Berry for all and all Berries for one' - huge huge positivity to you for a calm and happy birth when your mini Merk decides to make their appearance!

So, my Catching Rainbows plan came back. No hard sell (no selling of any type actually) snake oil or sprocket science answers, but she has looked at each thing I've identified and given me positive steps to work on. So it looks like I'm going to be heading to H&B for some Co Q10, magnesium, omega 3 and low dose B6. I've also been taking too much Agnus Castus and need to ditch Evening Primrose entirely (she thinks my oestrogen needs 'balancing', which my crappy skin would support!). I'm also going to be cutting back on wheat, so maybe that will help with the ol' weight loss (she even included a weeks meal plan with recipes).
Green tea for fertile cm and she's suggested acupuncture as something to think about.

I've also been recommended Linseed Tea, frankly the recipe sounds barmy and weird. Anyone else ever tried it?

I've also been given 2 mp3 tracks, one apparently written just for me (not received just yet).

All in all, I'm pretty happy with it. She's given me some really useful insights and just the way she's written the plan makes me feel more positive so I am going to give it a bash and see what happens. Can't hurt, right?

Sorry for essay......

because x post while I was composing that tome - so sorry for the BFN. Enjoy the and I hope you're feeling a bit better, don't be too hard on yourself - none of us deserve the circumstances we've been dealt but we're wiser and more compassionate people for it and we'll all get our berry babies in the end, by hook or by crook.

Because It's a bitch isn't it. For everything else in life we know that if we do all that we need in the right order to the best of our abilities then we win. TTCing throws that in our faces.

Parsley weight loss strategy is eat less shit, run more. It's worked in the past.

Sorry AF got you win .

pip I'm still here! Having a woe is me evening. Went out to a lecture one of our friends was giving and afterwards went for a meal. It was us, DH's best mate whose wife is due any day, and DH's friend who had twins the day I realised we'd lost ours. They started when we started and they have 5 month old twins. His best mate started trying well over a year later and he's going to be a dad within the next fortnight. It sucks.
And jobwise I'm getting frustrated where I am, but I thought I'd be on maternity by now... There's an assistant head job at a local school being advertised and I've got the relevant experience but it doesn't start until September. It's definitely not the kind of job you'd want to take and then announce you were pg. But then I've spent the last two years not taking jobs because I'm expecting to be wanting maternity leave at some point.... Arhh.

Parsley to be honest I'd forgotten all about the chasing rainbows thing, mine should be done by Friday. Glad you found it helpful.

Right, off to sleep. Hopefully I'll wake up in a better mood.

Welcome back Pip and Sparechange. Sorry for those with difficult pregnancy announcements.

It was my 40th today. Don't feel too bad about turning 40 although it would have felt much better to actually have had children or at least be pregnant by now.

Polyp op isn't until the end of June and our appointment to discuss frozen cycles is towards the end of April. Guess I've just got to be patient and take the opportunity to get my bod in the best shape possible although understandably had a day off today and had two slices of coffee cake amongst other things.

Happy 40th Gil. You've kept that quiet so I've broadcast it in t'other place . Sorry to hear that you've got a bit of a wait for your op but it'll be here before you know it.
Pip and Feather hope the thrush clears up quickly for you.
Think it's safe to say I'm OVing at the moment (albeit a couple of days later than usual - could this be the vits?). Serious ovary ache at the moment, don't know why I bother with the temping and OPKs, I really couldn't get a clearer sign. Think I'm too knackered to DTD again tonight. Already done it twice this week and its only Wednesday - getting too old for all this! Hopefully last nights effort will cover it

Hello gingerly steps in, I was wondering, whether, mmh, maybe, I could join you? I've been reading your thread for a couple of months now waiting till I would qualify for the 12 months entrance criteria. I'm 35 (almost 36), TTC no1, just coming up to trying for a year. Me being impatient, I asked to do a home fertility check on his swimmers and the results were not good. We did it twice and both times there was no test line (another one of those 'can you see a line moments' which ended in disappointment). He's been to the GP who has said that it is VERY rare (his capitals) for men to have any fertility issues. I have used CBFM and that shows I am ovulating regularly, cycle usually 25 days. I have annual gynae checkups with dildocam as this is usual procedure where I am from. So my doctor who is absolutely lovely has confirmed that I do have ovaries which are working fine with no evidence of cysts or fibroids or any other issues.

I am sure DP must be upset about this situation but he does not really let on. His way of showing that something is wrong is having panic attacks, collapsing etc. We've had a very stressful year with moves, job moves, financial worries etc. So I was hoping we'd come to the end of this and now the home SA was so disappointing. Please can you tell me how to support DP better through this?

I hope I am not crashing your party/ thread. It's just starting to feel so lonely out here.

Cyclist welcome in. Sorry you're here, but it's the best place to be if you have issues as you'll get all the support you need. No experience of it myself but I think the GP may be wrong, it's not VERY rare for men to have issues. Can you push for the GP to do some more thorough sperm tests (or go private)? I wouldn't want you to worry too much on the basis of a home test as I'm not sure how accurate they are. Think there's also some berries here who have used vits and diet change to improve sperm issues so they should be able to advise. Seems like pretty much all of the berries are teachers though so you may have to wait until schools out before you get a response! In the meantime make yourself comfy

RP sorry I didn't respond sooner regards your EWCM. I honestly think your chart and FF are indicating your correct O date. EWCM can be seen throughout a cycle, and its normal for it to be produced pre O, which is probably what you are seeing. Have you tried charting it along with your temps and OPKs as then FF will also take this into account (although like I said I think your O date is correct as per your chart tbh). Btw where are you with the docs?

Hi Berries, I hope you don't mind me popping in, but it seems everyone is at a low point at the moment so I just wanted to say hi and offer some encouragement. TTC is an absolute beating when all around you there are people having babies left and right, and here we are temping, monitoring CM, losing weight, gaining weight, undergoing surgeries, enduring dildocams, etc - it's utter shit and can really take a toll. But please don't lose faith. If it happened to a wizened old crone like me, it can happen to you. And until it does, there's support from people who have been there who know exactly what it's like to have such all-encompassing feelings that living normal life just doesn't seem possible. We will all get there in the end Til then, I say go for the new jobs! Especially if they pay more! Babies are expensive!

Kamikaze welcome and hi; you have found the right place for support and understanding. DH and I were unexplained but went through nearly 2 years of testing, and I think the thing that helped us through was trying not to attach any extra emotion to the tests/appointments than was already there. The situation was hard enough without either of us feeling bad about being the one with the potential problem. I think if I were you, I'd let my DH know that his SA results weren't going to change my feelings towards him, but that we needed to arrange a proper test at the hospital to follow up on the home test's results. His GP is talking nonsense; our IVF specialist said the percentage of infertility issues due to male factors is the same as due to female factors. He needs to see someone who actually knows what he's talking about; getting a false sense of security is only going to cause problems down the line. Perhaps getting some concrete answers, and then the possible solutions that follow those answers, would help him feel more in control? Personally I found the "not knowing" hellish...I'd have much rather been told that x was causing our problems than that our delays were due to a mystery cause that may never be found, addressed or fixed.

*also just to add, there are some amazing ways to get around low sperm count...even if there is very little active sperm in his ejaculate, enough of a sample can be obtained surgically to make IVF a viable option.

Hi Sid great to see you and thanks for your lovely words of encouragement.
Welcome Kamikaze. Sorry you've found yourself here but you're definitely in the right place. As others have said male factor issues are very definitely not rare. I went to an open evening at a private FC last week and I can't remember the exact figure quoted but it was around 48% of problems TTC are down to the bloke. We've been told my DP's swimmers may be 'clumping and sticking'. Haven't had our follow up appointment to find out exactly what can be done about this but from our own research we've found out that supplements (especially Vitamin C) can help with this so DP is currently taking Zita Wests 'Vitamen' along with an extra daily Vitamin C dose. I would definitely get your DP to go back to his GP and ask for a full SA. Can't believe this wasn't offered before as its one of the easiest things to test for. Maybe the stressful time you've had is contributing to DPs issues but I wouldn't worry until you've had some answers from the docs. Fx for you