Fab Forty-Plus! Where are the BFPs...

[JBrd]

To keep this thread going, proving support to all of those of a 'riper vintage' wishing for a baby...

I have received so much help, advice and support here, so although I technically have graduated, I thought I'd get the next thread going to keep the momentum.

htbftm congratulations!!!
blossom so glad to hear from you!
MRI results were good as they didn't add other brain or kidney anomalies, but there's still the issue of almost complete agenesis of the corpus callosum which was obviously confirmed.. It's really hard now to predict outcomes, but I'm a little more hopeful than before..
Please every body save some thoughts and prayers for this baby
jbrd any news? .. thinking of you!!
hugs to all the ladies on the thread..

Congratulations Hoping lovely news x
Pootle so was the best Flump! You've brought back memories of my younger self walking around saying 'go away spoons' with my best Pootle lisp!! (I was probably about 35 at the time....) sorry to hear of your struggle. Have you tried acupuncture or reflexology? A few of us are trying the alternative approach. I have looked in to adoption. It did seem like a long & to be h

Sorry - typing on phone while in bed & pressed send too soon.
I was meant to say it seemed a very long & complicated process. Of course they have to be thorough but I was a bit put off by the intense questioning that was involved. They have shortened the process now & it can take as little as 8 months I think. I have watched a few adoption programmes on TV recently & I'm thinking about bringing it up with dh again. I was having lunch with a group of 9/10 year old girls at work the other day (I'm a teacher - I wouldn't have lunch with them through choice!) and one suddenly announced she was getting a brother! I asked a few questions and she said her parents had just been accepted for adoption. The total delight on her face made me melt & the line of 'I don't even have a cousin. I just want someone to play monopoly with' swung it for me. My dd needs that too!
Let me know if you start looking in to it. I was put off slightly by the open evening I went to but have been told to try a different area as they might be looking for different things.

mozzarella sending lots of positive vibes to you and your baby. Xx

Congrats hoping!!! Wish I was still as young as you!!

Suspect AF due any day now. Been mega shouty with DH, though not without cause.

Night all.

Congratualtions htbftm. Wonderful news for you.

Hi Pootle, sorry to hear you've not had any luck yet. It's a bloody hard road isn't it? Just think how sweet the reward will be when you do get to hold your baby.

Have you looked into IVF, or donor eggs? It isn't for everyone,I know, but it is an alternative.

I recently read about mini IVF in over 40's here Which sounds like a good alternative to normal IVF.

None of it is for me as my DH isn't willing, but I am okay with that. I still think I have a chance.

Mozza,I am glad there were no further anomalies. I know you will be worried no matter what anyone says, but it may be that you baby won't be affected badly by the agenisis of the corpus callosum. I know you will love your little one with all your heart no matter what you find when she is born.

Fireflies, being irritable is also a symptom of pregnancy It's not over til the witch shows her face (and even then, sometimes, it isn't over )

Hi Grizzer thanks, I haven't looked into reflexology or acupuncture but I am trying to reduce my stress levels through the medium of deep tissue massage (and wine) to try to help things along.

Brave person being a teacher - I used to be and gave it up. I now work in mental health doing risk assessments - which is far less stress!

I'm keen on the adopted route as it has always been my first choice, but DH wants to pass his genes on etc etc so after twenty years together we finally tried ttc but to no avail (yet).

We don't qualify for IVF as my local trust doesn't fund it. I'm not keen to try it. To me it makes more sense to offer a home to a child without one.

You never know. Looks like a few bfp's have happened on this thread in my absence! Fingers crossed for healthy, sticky babies.

Dh ambulanced to hospital this morning after vomiting & pooping blood. Looks like an ulcer but they are putting a camera down tomorrow to check. I'm already working out if he will have recovered enough in time for next ovulation!! How bad is that?? I have to add a few extra recovery days for the 'I know I'm fine now but want you to run around after me for a bit longer' phase that most men seem to go through. I am very sympathetic, honestly, but that clock has been ticking for a while now & every month counts!!

Oh Grizzer, sorry to hear about your DH, a bit worrying for you I suppose? I hope they can fix him up in time for next time's shag fest, or perhaps you won't need it? Where are you at in your cycle? In the tww?

Something very weird happening to me this 2ww. For the first time in ages I am getting really good, high post ovulation temperatures. I didn't take my temperature last cycle until I knew I was pregnant and they were very high, but previous months they barely got above 36.7, today's is 36.92. I've also had that same metallic taste in my mouth. I would be so pleased to get a bfp this time, but I'm trying really hard to NOT get my hopes up...

I hope higher temps are a sign of progesterone and not hot flushes that would not make me happy! Though high estrogen usually produces lower basal temps I think...Deige, are you out there? You know heaps about charting, a little wisdom would be appreciated

Grizzer I am a teacher too, though I teach secondary school. It is the last week of term (hurray!!!) we will have our two week Easter break starting Friday. I am certainly ready for a holiday, I am exhausted, as is DH (also a teacher) and DS and DD's. Unfortunately we still have to get through parent's night on Wednesday. God knows I'll be spent by Thursday.

Happy Monday, everyone

P.S. Jbrd, any news? I have been thinking about you. Did they repeat the Harmony?How long til you get results?

I had a look into the test in Australia, and because no one does the analysis of the bloods in Australia, it costs $850 to have the test done here, with no rebate. Geeze, I'd better start saving (if I get pregnant this cycle) DH won't be pleased about spending that kind of money, but I would rather do that than amnio, from what I read it (the harmony) is 99% accurate?

Hello, can I join you all? I'm 40 years old and trying TTc #2. I already have a lovely 4 year old DS, conceived accidentally whilst having a brief fling. Now I have finally met Mr Right, and am actually trying to conceive for the first time in my life- and so far (4 cycles) it hasn't happened.

The really really sad thing about it is that DP and I actually conceived about 18 months ago, a few weeks after we'd met (whilst using contraception!), and, keen to avoid making the same mistake twice, and not feeling that I'd known him long enough, I had a termination. You can bet I regret that now .

I really felt pregnant this cycle - had loads of symptoms, including sore boobs and nausea- but AF started this morning (properly, not just spotting). I still have sore boobs and nausea, so obviously my body is just playing cruel tricks on me.

I think it might be time to go and see the doctor and ask for tests- I might have to fib just slightly about how long we've been TTC....

I'm about 10 dpo I think but not much hope this month as we only managed it twice during ov week & I'm pretty sure one attempt was too early & one too late. I had my last mc on 15th April last year & that is the day AF is due. It would be amazing if I get a bfp but trying not to think about it.
So cruel to have parents night in the last week Gum but at least you then have a lovely holiday. So typical that we are off work when dh gets sick though - always happens in the holidays!
Drs have just taken him to have a camera down his throat. He is very anxious about it & in a lot of pain with the catheter (not sure if that's how you spell it!) don't think the porters have heard such colourful language as they tried to move him from one bed to another! I have taken the opportunity to slip away for a cuppa!
Fingers crossed temps are a good sign gum.

Welcome Stains sorry you have been through a difficult time but at least it sounds like you have no fertility problems. I also have 4 year old. She is desperate for a sibling but no luck yet!

The last days before AF are the worst, aren't they Grizzer? Dearie me, hope your OH makes a full recovery.....

Avo all

Gum I hope you’re right and you have spotted something.

Pootle can you do both concurrently? Apply for adoption and TTC?

Grizzer sounds v dramatic. Hope your DH is ok. Fingers crossed.

Welcome Stubborn. Glad you have found Mr Right and are TTC. May your stay here be short and sweet. YY to getting to your GP and getting as much testing done asap. Hope you won’t worry about it too much though. You’re still young by many of our standards. (I’m 44).

Although I am really hoping this is my month for a BFP, I am sure AF will show up any time now. Have been feeling deeply depressed as well as super stroppy which is another standard PMT symptom for me so I am sure any second now…. If no AF by end of tomorrow I’ll be thinking about POAS.

I need to swot up on my supps list, but somehow can’t get myself to do it.

Grizzer and Gum- I'm a teacher too! Perhaps it says something about us being too busy when we were younger lol! Thx for all the congrats! Welcome Stains - fingers crossed for u! xx

Grizzer Hope your DH feels better soon, that sounds scary!

Welcome stubborn!

Gum thank you for asking. I had a very good and detailed nuchal scan repeated at the FMC - all fine, measurements good, and no markers for Down's to be seen. But my bloods are still sh**, so my combined risk is still high.
They have repeated the Harmony test, and hopefully, I will have the results by next week (if it works!). Based on that, we will then decide if we are going to risk an invasive procedure... It's very difficult, as I would want to know in any case, even if we are in the 'grey' area risk-wise, but DH thinks that we should only risk an invasive test, if we are prepared to act on the result...
So for now, I'm back to taking one day at a time and wait. It's another 2ww, grrr

htbftm, for me it isn't really about being too busy when I was young - I am just greedy for a bunch of kids I started at 24, had my second at 27, third at 30, fourth at 34 and fifth at 41. I feel I need to have another in my forties so I can say I had 2 in each decade (20's, 30's and 40's).

However, I do wish I hadn't left such a gap between my last two.Then perhaps I could have had my sixth back when I was 40 instead of having this difficult time and making it 47, still without a THB. But that's not how it worked out, so I just keep trying...

Fireflies, did you POAS yet???

I am 9 dpo, but will hold out a few more days (I hope ) before I poas.

Cross posted with you jbrd. All the waiting is excruciating, isn't it?

Your DH has a point, if you aren't going to terminate, then why have the amnio or cvs? Unless it is to help you with a plan for managing any particular condition the baby may have.

I read that the harmony (it is called something else here, but is known as Non-invasive prenatal screening and bloods are sent overseas for analysis) is 99% accurate. So in your opinion, is it still worth having the combined nuchal and bloods if you have the harmony? (I am asking in case I ever get to the point of having testing done). In my experience the combined bloods and nuchal screening causes such a lot of heart-ache. It was my bloods that was causing the issue when I was pregnant with DS and the result pointed to a high chance of trisomy 13 or 18. I think it was the Papp-A (does that sound right, it was such a long time ago - 6 years- and I can't remember). My number was too low I think. Anyway, after getting the news that DS was fine (after a very detailed and long ultrasound at 17 weeks) I decided the early screening was not worth it and the next time I would go straight to amnio. Of course that's not how I feel now. I'd much rather avoid invasive screening, as I am sure you would too. Though it seems the odds for a miscarriage are very low.

Sorry you have to go through another tww. This baby making business is all about waiting isn't it? Hopefully you will have the all clear soon and will be able to relax and enjoy your pregnancy.

Nope, haven't POAS yet as don't have any at home. Was contemplating popping out to late night chemist, but DS not sleeping well and DH snoring away, so don't want to leave them to it. I'd rather wait for positive news anyway, than disappoint myself earlier with bad news, IYSWIM. I would have done it by now though if I had some in the house. I should wait another day really.

What I'm really looking for though is a repeat of the absolutely dreadful way I felt when I found out was pregnant for the first time. If I feel like that again I won't need to do a test to know.

BTW, love this website for a bit of self-indulgent obsessing: www.countdowntopregnancy.com/

Just popping in to say hi . Returned to work last week and feel like I've been hit by a bomb . Also have a nasty sickness bug that is taking longer to recover from than I'd hoped.
Things sound encouraging fireflies and gum (high temps are progesterone related, sounds good xx) - fingers crossed for both, and of course everyone else on this thread xxx

Fingers crossed too for you jbrd that the harmony works for you this time xx

Hello Diege, I was hoping you'd drop in. Poor you having to return to work when you aren't well. I hope you can get some rest, but I know how hard that is with young children and work.

I have got myself practically convinced that I must be pregnant this cycle. Honestly, you'd think after ttc for so long, so many months of symptoms that meant nothing I'd know better. But on the other hand, I've had ten pregnancies in total, and should have a clue, shouldn't I?

Anyway, I have the strongest metallic taste in my mouth, which rather than coming and going, is there constantly, which means I am eating all the time because if I don't,the taste makes me feel sick.This is so familiar to me in early pregnancy. I did have it after the chemical pregnancy,and it turned out I had a virus, a tummy bug, but this time,it has been constant for days and I am not unwell. The high temperatures keep coming (hurray!!They haven't been this good in years and they are even higher than all my pregnancy graphs) and the tender boobs aren't letting up (though I admit I have them every cycle, usually dropping off around 12 dpo). These symptoms are so strong, I wouldn't be surprised if I have twins! (Now I really am going loopy )

So we shall see. I usually get spotting and temperature dropping 12 dpo if AF is coming. I am 10 dpo and foolishly did a test this morning - after yet another early wake up and vivid dreams again. But although I swear I saw something faint to start with, there really is nothing there now.

Any news for you Fireflies ?

Grizzer how is your DH? I hope all is well for him.

Not been lucky this month. At least I can deal with it now all the hormones have cleared and am no longer pre-menstrual. Oh, and the sun is shining today. I am counting my blessings. Will have to try harder this month and get going on the supps etc. Wondering about more IVF (for those who don't know me, I had two failed IVF cycles in 2011. DS was a spontaneous conception immediately after second cycle failed.) Don't fancy it though, and have to completely wean DS off boobs and it's not keen!! There is always our frozen embryo too. Might consider adoption too.

Hi diege. Nice to see you again. Hope things improve for you.

Waves to all.

I mean 'he's not keen', rather than 'it'. Do view DS as lovely little person rather than inanimate object!! He does make keeping up on MN diff at times!!

Sorry to hear you're out this month Fireflies. Lots of options by the sound of things though.
Dh is much better, should be home tomorrow. Once treatment is underway recovery is quite quick so hopefully he will happily sit watching the golf that is apparently on for the next few days & I can get on with decorating the hall.
Quick question: I am about 12dpo but AF not due til 15th which would make me 18dpo. Is that normal? I've never really thought about it but that seems quite a long time after ov. I normally have a 31 day cycle. I think I must have ov'd earlier than normal this month.
All sounds very promising Gum, everything crossed for you.