The hot new TTC after MC thread - all welcome, bring a fish and all the posifrickentivity you can muster! Prepare to overshare.

[Seasides]

The Rules...

(1) A lady may only POAS on a Friday.
(2) Friday means the day that everyone calls Friday in the time zone where you spent the night.
(3) Rule (1) does not apply to POA-OPK-S, UNLESS they are being illegitimately used as surrogate HCG detectors, in which case Rule (1) most definitely does apply
(4) Rule (1) does not apply following a BFP because if you want to waste £25 a day POADigiS that's your prerogative
(5) Rule (1) does not apply if a lady is POAS in an attempt to get a BFN to prove she can start DTD with intent
(6) Rule (1) does not apply if a lady wants for unknown reason to pee on an actual stick, like a twig or some such, if that lady is unexpectedly caught short whilst tramping in the forest looking for bears.
(7) These rules (including Rule (1)) are subject to the change at any time if the ladies of the Posifrickentivity thread decide on a whim come up with empirical evidence to prove that it is luckier to POAS on any other day of the week
(8) Violators of Rule (1) shall be subject to fish throwing.

And as a grand finale, why not pledge to NEVER POAS before 14DPO?

She finally showed, af is here! Just so relieved which I never thought I'd say.

otters I gave FB up cold turkey nearly a month ago, literally have not missed it for even one second!! I thoroughly recommend it, my general happiness levels have definitely improved.

sebs I saw that too, speaking of reading stuff in the paper - did anyone see the article in metro last week about some study into wombs 'rejecting' eggs? I can't remember the detail of it now, but t was interesting!

I've had a busy few days so just caught up on the thread today.

Sundance I'm sorry you're stuck in limbo. It's awful but hopefully you'll get an answer soon.

Sorry to hear about ladies feeling like they're losing the TTC competition. I thought I was lucky to get past my 'would have been 12 weeks pregnant' date a couple of weeks ago without any pregnancy announcements. But then my friend announced it on Monday. She will be due 2 weeks after my due date. It felt like a kick in the guts. I hate the jealousy that mc has made me feel when I just want to be happy for my friends and relax about my chances

And tonight we are having friends round for dinner, who are 5 months pregnant with their 2nd. I'm hoping I'll feel ok. It was even me who organised it cos I thought it was better than avoiding it.

Cross post Sundance. Glad you have some relief now and hoping that AF leaves promptly and readies your body for a baby!

Arf @ semi-automatic trout gun and sugar water! MN really does need a fish emoticon!

Ah deus, you're a braver woman than me organising that! I'm dreading this evening. I'm meeting up with four female friends for dinner and I just KNOW that one of them is bound to be pregnant. None of them know about my 2 year ttc shit and mc. I'm already practising my happy face

Parsley - since blocking all the upduffed and newborn feeds from Facebook there's non left! Quite happy about a lack of Facebook in my life add I'm now addicted to MN!

Deus - I did that with my upduffed bf and her husband, the issues are mine so don't think it's fair to externalise them! Plus if I backed off now I'd end up an acquaintance which I very much don't want! I just tell her I'm jealous but happy! Honesty seems to have worked!

@ Otters - I'd tell them, you'd be surprised by how many people are affected by this, but no-one talks about it! Maybe not blurting it out over dinner, especially if there is a PG announcement , but let the news filter out, as I just said I've found being honest about stuff has worked wonders and reduced my mental ing!

I'd agree with MissH on the telling friends part. I've told my close friends, including all 4 of my pregnant ones about my mc. I was fed up of the "it'll be you next" and "get a move on" comments. They were all very nice and have been really supportive since, not rubbing their pregnancies in my face and asking how I am etc. I've really found its helped me to feel positive. They all know i'm super happy for them, but are equally aware of how much I want it. There's no shame in having a misscarriage, but people rarely talk about it.

otters If they are good friends, tell them (esp if there are no pg announcements), you might be surprised... I was amazed at how many people said that they had also had one or more mcs when I told them. It is unbelievably common, but no one ever talks about it. And people are often much much nicer than you give them credit for. I've had so much support from my friends during my mcs, it was brilliant.
In fact, I find it much easier to talk to my friends about all this than my family, or even DH

If the subject of babies comes up (which it will, we're all at that 'stage'), then I might mention it. Obviously not after any pregnancy announcements of course

I've told a few friends about it, as has DP and everyone has been lovely. I haven't told any family though, not even my Mum which makes me a bit sad. But I know that she'd almost be too caring iykwim? One day I'll tell her, but I'd like to get upduffed again first.

It's a bizarre and mixed set of emotions that comes after mc. I hope that none of my friends ever have to experience it, truly I don't. But the selfish, envious, sad part of me wishes they could understand the pain it causes. I'm surrounded by instadiffers and successful baby-producers However, tits up etc. I'm going to go pee on an opk right now

I have to agree that telling friends has really helped. We had to christenings about 3 days after my first mc and I just couldn't face them, when I explained why they were both really understanding and I didn't feel so guilty.

Thanks for the warm wishes over the last few days ladies - I'm feeling better already. Had a dream last night I got pg with twins...that would do nicely, get them all popped out in one go and then have a hysterectomy! I wish.

Or rather, tits out rather than up!

Glad the witch finally showed her ugly mug sundance

haha misshobart yes have similar cycles. I ovulated either yesterday evening or this morning. So no more shagathon here. We only managed TITH twice, so I am not very hopeful this cycle. In fact ZERO hope.

I totally get the competition. I want to be first too among my friends. I was one of the first to have DC 1, but all have moved on to DC2 and we can't seem to jump the hurdle.

sundance hope you are keeping ok. It surely must be a case of late ovulation. Stress does that to you.

I have recently read that drinking lots of water helps the egg quality. So that is what I will be trying next month - though we probably also need to up ante on dtd too.

50 times - that is massive !! did they not to anything else the entire month?

OMG 50 times! And I was feeling like a total champ for TITH 7 times in a week and a half. High fives may have been involved [nlush].

Glad the witchy one finally made an appearance sundance. She's never exactly welcome but at least you know where you stand.

Feeling quite blessed that Londoners seem to be quite late starters on the whole settling down and having babies malarkey. Only a few friends have gone before me but I have married into the most ridiculously fertile family. I have 10 nieces and nephews with one more on the way!

Haha frozen fingers. Obviously nlush meant

ha he you will be very impressed with my ehem every day TITH sessions with OH from the day we got the scan all clear. He is on holiday this week so we are going to get busy up till Sunday and then maybe every other day unless i get some obvious signs OV is on the way.

Also exhausted just thinking about that much TITH. I'm not surprised they're not leaving the house, I bet the poor girl can hardly walk anymore!

waves to the witch glad she's finally decided to put you out of your misery Sundance. Maybe this is the start of a new, happier luteal phase for you?

Every day?! I'm getting performance anxiety. Maybe I'm just not pg because we don't shag enough? Going to attempt smep this month so I can rule that possibility out!

Glad but sad we all feel the same about the competition thing!

My mate whose getting married has now made me feel terrible by asking me to be one of her bridesmaids. Feels lovely to be asked then she said that we'd leave looking at dresses until the summer then I can choose a maternity one. Bless her. She's even got us on her list as +1?.

Haven't been a proper bridesmaid before but fuck me, the other two are 5'10 and like twiglets. I'm 5'3 and look like I've eaten all the twiglets!!!

Im lucky that on the whole OH can rise to the occasion, however in the past there have been times where ive tried to bounce on him at 6am before work and it was NEVER going to happen. Poor bastard could hardly keep his eyes open.

On the whole they say if you can have sex every third day across the month you are likely to catch the egg.

Thanks ladies....currently sat drinking a nice glass if vino tinto, ignoring the fact that out dustbin just blew over and our rubbish is flying all over the street!

sal, your friend sounds really sweet. Bridesmaid is a good role at a wedding depending on the brides taste in dresses.

Just checked my fertility app history, last time I got pg was when we DTD/TITH every night for 8 days over the fertile bit, ovulating right in the middle of that. I remembering it being knackering and getting boring after day 3, but it worked!!

Mmm, twiglets!

Now I love a bit of TITH but 50 times? Her 'flowerpot' must be more like a ruddy great planter tub!

The month I got my BFP we did it 4 times, 3 before OV was due and 1 as a bit of a 'better late than never' a few days later on holiday.

Hope no one is in the path of this ridiculous weather tonight. We've battened down the hatches and the mogs (a lady local to here reported seeing her cats 'flying through the air' during the last windy spell) just to be on the safe side!