TTC 10 months + Part 17.

[MuddyWellyNelly]

For all the lovely 10+ers, and anyone else lurking, who has been trying for long enough to start worrying. This is a great place to rest until the elusive BFP shows up.

Fox how dare you eat our rabbit!
Loving the new name.

Euro stay cation sounds relaxing. Glad the scratch was okay. Lol at lady garden being well 'ard!

Waves to sweet. Haven't seen you here for ages!

Okay moaning alert. Called the clinic again .. 2 hang ups and 1 no answer later I finally got through. Apparently the results are still waiting to be reviewed by the big man ( they came back last week!) but it's unlikely I will be informed of my results this week now ( they told me latest today 2 days ago ) and more likely I will hear next week.
Am completely fed up with it all frankly!

Nelly I was going to say re AF - are you doing OPKs? I find AF always have a happen of coming when it shouldn't and when you want it to come it doesn't appear. They don't call her the witch for nothing!

Sea no I don't usually bother. Because this was a post IVF cycle it's to be expected that my cycle would be out of kilter. But in previous rounds it has been predictably irregular - ie still been within the timeframe they indicated. I might do an OPK now though. Last night I had a very sore ovary when I went to the loo.

Your clinic are spectacularly inefficient. Isn't the result binary? As in, the level has come down enough, or it hasn't? Of course you still might have options to discuss further but can't believe you haven't heard back on even the absolute result.

Nelly it sounds like an opk might be worth doing to know where you are esp as you think you might be ovulating. Ovary twinges are usually good indicator though.

Yes it is just a yes or no answer but they are refusing to tell me even though I know they can (according to FF boards). I think it's doesn't help that they have around 60 ladies cycling at anyone time apparently so if you are just doing tests you are at the back of the queue. I do get it but it doesn't make it any less frustrating. If it's true cytokines are made worst by stress I think this week has just seen my shot up again!? Ha.

sea I think its madness that everything has to go through him he isn't god it sounds a bit controlling, one of his colleagues should be able to talk to you about it instead of making you wait, they need to learn some time management skills, it doesn't matter how many women are cycling, if they can't manage then they need to scale back or expand

Buzzy I was thinking earlier that the doctors there can't feel very empowered!

So I did an OPK but am none the wiser. It has a line that was quite strong but maybe not quite as dark as the control. But I'd have expected to have ov'd about 2 weeks ago. If I was going to at all this cycle of course. Do you get lines on an OPK at all points of your cycle and it's just the darkness that's relevant?

It would be good to know if I've just/am about to ov so I know now to worry about AF for a while longer.

Um nelly - dare I ask if another variety of stick should be purchased?

Sea - how blooding infuriating! You must be so cross. All you want is an answer. It is not good when you are spending that much money. I was very fortunate I worked close so I would never call and would pop in but it sounds like that wouldn't make a difference. However I do think November is exceptional for them. I hope they get their act together soon.

Euro - well done for doing the scratch. I am sorry mrE doesn't seem on board but I m sure he will be once things get going.

Nelly / sweets words thanks! Also I m sorry about the funny cycles. My cycles are all over the place these days. I am not sure when they are suppose to settle down after ivf.

Cos - did you ever go for your job interview?

Oh I don't think I was brave doing everything alone. I preferred it in many respects. To be fair to Roy, his job doesn't allow time off as he freelance and so I was very conscious that his work would frown on him taking time off for appointments.
Funny how this baby thing creeps up. Just as I had written how distracted I had been lately, I have felt very sad and anxious about things the last few days.

Out of interest does anyone know if you can donate blood whilst TTC?

Nelly - Lh can often be in your system can't it but don't you normally have 30 day cycles? Has it been 5 weeks since your last period?? Those line ones are so confusing, is it worth getting a smiley one?

But nelly to answer your stripe opk question I've had dark but not as dark lines in the run up to ov but also just before my period which there hasn't appeared to be an answer for. I get a darker than the control line when I'm about to ov and all other times almost no line. My other post about them other sticks can be read that I see no reason why you can't get that surprise bfp, I really do believe that.

Sea. Fox rage. I do wonder if going in would help?

Joycep, have a hug. It all comes in waves and different frequencies doesn't it? I know the journey is long but you will get there and you have us for company.

Now I jumped on in and haven't even read back properly. But I will and there's f and b talk to be caught up with too I see.. I'm glad it's Friday. I'd be even gladder if I didn't feel like my ladyparts were full of pva glue

Gluey ladyparts foxy?? That sounds erm, unusual . I know what you meant about the other stick and I'm ignoring you. I had no OV signs until these last few days. Thank you for the cheer-lead though! Right back at ya :)

Joy I'm actually on day 42 of a normal 27-ish cycle but apparently the Prostap injection means the delay is normal. Today (yesterday?) was the upper limit of the expected range but my body has had a fair bit of confusion in the last year, so I assume it is just on strike like it appears to be permanently

Joy sorry I missed that you were in a slump. I'm the same. Fine fine fine fine wham sad and miserable and panicky. I find them easier to deal with these days though as I know they will pass. You've been through so much.

I'm almost certain that TTC is ok for blood donation. You maybe need a withdrawal period (Ha!) re the drugs though?

Just coming on with my hand held out for Joy. You have been through ever so much. Of course you will feel like this. But nelly is right, it will pass but we are here for you until it goes.

Nelly. Those sticks are terrible. I know the smileys are expensive but I think Joy is right they are worth it. I buy them in bulk online at a discount. I did use to think but what if I get bfp straight away? It would be a waste. Erm I have bought in bulk about 5 times! [hollow laugh]

Rabbit. Yes some immune ladies on ff have gone in and refused to leave until a doc come and talk to them about results. I may end up doing the same but I'm naturally not a confrontational person. Also getting angry makes me teary and I get v embarrassed when that happens. Will just try to be patient for a bot longer. How was your shopping trip?

Buzzy yes I know and I agree with you about control. It's a strange set up. The big man makes all the decisions and the other docs just carry out his decisions. I have never actually met or spoken to mr t. Nonetheless they seem to get decent results. I'm also amaze how many people (even those who it didn't work for) recommend them highly. I am not sure what Joy thinks but a good friend in RL still tells me she wouldn't go anywhere else. She never did get her bfp though. Anyway, for now I will put up with it.

Loving the furry baby chat on the other place.

Waves and frequencies is exactly what it is Fox. I don't know whether others do this but there are some people in my life with kids who pray on my mind so much. It's normally because of something they have said or how they go on about their kids and I just play it over and over angrily in my head when I am in these moods. I will then just snap out of it until the next time.

Nelly - our bodies are put through so much with ivf, it is no wonder that they don't know whether they are coming and going. I am still intrigued by what your bod is up to.

Sea - I would still recommend them even though they are so frustrating and there is only one man who makes all the decisions.. But I always felt in safe hands running up to EC and knowing that all the monitoring helped with the drug dosages. I will feel very uneasy doing an nhs round after going there especially as I hear some people don't even get a blood test during stimms. But if money is tight which it is for many there , it can be very stressful. I did try to find out where people go after failed Argy rounds but the people who fail there don't seem to hang around these boards. Did your friend go on somewhere else?
Ps - I am convinced it will all pay off for you.

sea I find it worrying that people put all their faith in just one place, I think it can be detrimental to them and the outcome they are after, there results are not that fantastic and so far advanced than others, and their is no way I would ever let myself be treated the way they do their paying customers, there is such a range of choice out there clinic wise, this is such a stressful and expensive process that they should be making each couple feel valued and understood and that each cycle is important while trying to lessen the stress they are under. A calm environment is important.

I hope you get your results soon so you can start to cycle, you've had a long wait

joy they appear to be the only clinic that go OTT with the blood tests, I think they are not necessary to get the results, you might find the laid back approach of the NHS is just the ticket for you :) although might seem alien after the ARGY :)

foxy they can be grim, I always used the back door so there was no mess

nelly I noticed your dining chairs are similar to ours, K likes to pretend it is Mt Everest and climb up the back of then :) leaving claw marks in the wood I am with foxy on the pee sticks

sweet good to hear from you, where are you at, besides running to work

Joy - I am glad you feel that way. I am just so sorry it didn't work for you there. My friend had 7 rounds of IVF. She did her 6th round at the Argy. Her final round was at Care in Nottingham but she told me without a doubt that Argy was the best place. She actually said it was the only place where she felt they treated her like a human being. She didn't do another round there only because she physically couldn't cope with the demands on her body anymore but when I told her I was tempted to do a round elsewhere she spent ages persuading me not to. She has adopted now but she says she believes if she had done another couple of rounds she at the Argy she would have got pregnant. Who know! I have heard of people going to Greece after Argy. I know my friend considered it as well.

Buzzy - I do agree with you that it feels unhealthy. I see a lot of ladies on FF where they have put a lot into it (given up work etc) and then they get a BFN. I think an ARGY BFN is mentally v difficult because of the huge investment mentally, physically and financially. I have kind of resigned myself now anyway as my Cytokine treatments will come to an end by Jan at the latest anyway even if my results are still bad. I feel I have come this far with them I should see it through. I did have a chat with a friend who manages a big IVF centre in Italy recently and she made a good point which is in the time I have waited this year to cycle at the ARGY, I could have done 3 IVFs and the probability of a BFP after 3 ivfs is about the same chances of success of 1 round at the ARGY. She also said that age is the most important factor in IVF success which gave me food for thought as I pretty much “wasted” 1 year. Oh well… too late now. One thing I am sure of though is they don’t do it for the money.. it is v expensive because of the tests but most of cost is to pay the external blood people or the Chicago tests. I honestly think the man does it for his legacy more than anything. I think the organisational set up is scary.. I mean what will happen if something happens to him!? None of the other docs are empowered to make any decisions!

sea you have been more than patient with your cytokines and have tried hard to lower them, its time to cycle, will they give you IVIG when you cycle?

Hello ladies,

Back from a hectic few weeks at work, including some travel which is very unusual for me. Haven't managed to read back everything but will try to catch up and check out the other place. I do miss you all and will keep posting but saying much about what is happening with me seems like rubbing salt in the wound for some.

mrsd I am so sorry. I hope that you will bounce back quickly and the frosties prove more fruitful. I agree that it can take quite a few embryos to find the ones that are destined to survive. I had some really good ones on day 2 that didn't make it but obviously was still capable of making embies that could stick. There is lots of hope for you.

foxy loving the new name . I really can't imagine what waking up from EC must have been like. I was dreading it second time round because the first had been miserable. You really should write this all down. One day you'll look back and marvel at how strong you were and how well you coped with it all - even if it doesn't feel like it now. I am hoping for a brilliant end to this tale though.

nelly how frustrating! I never got the hang of the stripey sticks. I always went with the smiley face just so there was no second guessing.

joy I say try to embrace the nhs approach. It can work. It is no wonder that you are all over the place emotionally. Take each day as it comes and you will get through it.

sea I hate confrontation too but I would be heading over there in person at this point. The clinic may be good but they need to limit the number of women cycling at any one time if they can't manage it.

Big waves to everyone else. We are ticking along here. 15 weeks on Monday and counting.

joy I only had one blood test on my first cycle and got my BFP. I had 2 or 3 on the second and third cycles. At my clinic it depends on who does the scan. Some drs don't seem to use the, others order them routinely.

Sorry to hear you are in a bit of a slump.

Sea you have been more than patient. This must be so frustrating.

fox how are you doing?

I'm still waiting for AF. I didn't temp this cycle, so I'm not too sure when I ovulated but AF should arrive soon. Whatevs'. I'm a bit disinterested in this cycle, frankly.

Euro did you follow the "use contraception" advise leading up to your scratch? I didn't as it seemed rather futile!

Still no AF here either. "And I'm all like, whateva " (have just been reading a thread on chat about signs that you are old. I wanted to shout at them...Steam Mops??? Onesies?? Radio Twoooo?? COME ON )

No, I didn't bother. It seemed somewhat ridiculous to get the out of date condoms out in the circumstances. I did POAS the morning of it though, but it was a bit pointless as I'm not sure how many DPO I was.

Mad, I don't believe you are 15 weeks already. You must be thrilled. I am really happy for you. Does it feel real?

Fox, How are you doing? Is OTD 1st Dec?

Euro, Any sign of the witch? Can the scratch delay things?

Buzz, I have no idea if ivig will be given during the cycle. I am not keen on the stuff at all - the idea of blood products make me very queasy but MrS has made me agree not to question the treatment too much and just let them do what they think best. I am just blocking everything out. To think I spent years not even taking painkillers and never took the pill as I didn't want to put too many hormones and chemicals in my body! HA!

So it looks like the mayo worked as cytokines are down below 30. It looks like I will cycle in Dec exactly over Xmas and NY time provided they don't want to test my FSH again. I am waiting for a doc to call and confirm what the next steps are.

Hurrah for mayo! You are doing incredibly well to go along with all this. I have a similar attitude to painkillers and the pill as you and I just couldn't. I've found it hard enough to come to terms with the usual IVF drugs.

The witch is sort of here. Having told the nurse on Thursday at the teaching appt that I never have any trouble identifying when my period starts - no spotting or whatever... I'm having trouble identifying when my period starts! I had a bit of spotting on Saturday, some light bleeding yesterday and more light bleeding today (my periods are normally daftly heavy within about 12 hrs of starting). V odd. Just waiting for the clinic to call me back and book my scan.

Sea that is great news! I'm so please the wheels are in motion for you at last.

Mad, 15 weeks wow! Soon there will be wriggling

Euro how annoying. I really struggle to define cd1 and it was an arse last month.

Sea yes my otd is at the weekend. However, I'm due to get my period tomorrow ish going by ov day and a 13 day luteal phase though I'm guessing all of that is out the window. I feel the same as I felt since day one of the pessaries, bloated, heavy in the belly but nothing else. Presuming a test would be pretty indicative now and that pessaries are holding off spotting. I just don't want this tiny tiny bubble of hope to be gone so I keep shoving them up there. Can I do a bit of a poll, did most people here have to stop the pessaries to get their period?

Sea - that's great news and doing it over Xmas will be a lot quieter there. I just hope EC doesn't fall on Xmas day or anything! . I started my round 3 days after Xmas day last year. But I expect you will be on the long protocol as your amh is so good. Can't believe your friend had 7 rounds of ivf. Did they know what the problem was?

Rabbit - my period would come whilst I was on pessaries during my IuI days. Last ivf, period came 2 days after I stopped gestone and pessaries. My progesterone levels were over 500 as well so it didn't take long for period to appear.

Euro - strange how your period is being funny. Can't believe you are about to start again.

Buzz - I read an interview with MrT of the Argc and the journo asked him what his secret was for his good results and he said it was simply the monitoring so he could tailor the drug doses. I agree it's OTT though and it didn't work for me! Will be interesting to compare how I perform when I am not monitored on the nhs though.