TTC 10 months + Part 17.

[MuddyWellyNelly]

For all the lovely 10+ers, and anyone else lurking, who has been trying for long enough to start worrying. This is a great place to rest until the elusive BFP shows up.

Good luck rabbit!

35 weeks! Wow gin - not long to go now!

I think I'll say yes to the clexane if there is any risk of OHSS, but not otherwise.

Good luck rabbit!

I'm still waiting for my AMH result. Hmmm.

Talk of the devil, the clinic just called. My AMH is 15.2 - higher than it was 2 years ago! (It was 12.something then.). Well that is one less thing to worry about.

Just goes to show euro! That's great news, I think you've already responded well to get an egg on each natural round so I think with a good Amh you'll do really well on a stimulated round.

Euro, have you got any closer to working out what the reason for your infertility might be? Something I wanted to ask those who have managed to get upduffed by Ivf, did it working give you any idea what the original problem was that Ivf was able to fix?

Sorry, very badly worded. Hope you know what I mean!

I do know what you mean.

No, not really! No conclusions were offered at our follow up. Although with an mc and 2 chem pregs from 3 rounds, that suggests to me that we get fertilisation ok, and make blastos (we must get that far for there to be an attempt at implantation), but each time the embryos have failed between implantation and 6 weeks. So maybe a chromosomal problem. Three out of four embies have been slow growers in the lab in the early days as well. If so, it probably is just a numbers game, so a stimulated cycle might do the trick.

How are you doing?

Rabbit - best of luck today and go Boris! I often wonder how other people I know would fare on this journey. My BiL announced back in June they were expecting their 3rd child and I was furious...like the lovely SiL I am. But they are the people who have said to us how amazing it is to have kids at Xmas and how they aren't close to friends without kids now and really are very good at making us feel sad about our lack of kids. Anyway Sadly they had a m/c at 16 weeks. But BiL was talking to Roy last month saying how difficult it was for them because all their friends were expecting their 2nd/3rd children. And I know this is all relative and it must have been very hard for them but my tough side says they have 2 perfect happy kids already. Both conceived immediately as was their 3rd. Even if the worst came to the worst and they could never have another one at least they have a family. They never have had to go through ivf or the pain of infertility trying desperately for one child. I was just quite shocked Roy's bro showed no consideration for Roy when he was saying how hard it was for them. I know I come from a different angle on this but I did wonder how they would have coped in our position and struggling for one. Perhaps iabu though and just because they didn't struggle for their first doesnt make losing their third any less important. Perhaps it was just the lack of thought BiL showed for Roy that got me.

Gin - 35 weeks, omg! I've noticed Time flies when you aren't pregnant but I am sure those 35 weeks have dragged for you. I know I would be nervous every step of the way because long awaited babies are super special but your little girl will be fine of course.

Mrsd - as you will be aware I've banged on for a long time about our issues but we also aren't really that closer to knowing what our prob is. One quick natural pregnancy and then nothing apart from 2 definite CPs in 2 years. That to me suggests the first pregnancy instigated some immune problems. But Ivf shows our embryos don't get very far but that could be too many drugs making quality poor (well am hanging on to that theory otherwise we are screwed). So i am not sure ivf has been particularly useful for diagnosing for us.
As far as I can work out though, if there is a male factor issue then I think you have a better chance of it working especially when you have good egg quality. Everybody I have met or heard of whose issue is just male factor got there in the end that's why I have such faith you will get there. I have also met so many people who seemingly have everything against them but still ivf works. It's people like me and Roy that makes me worried- nothing apparently hugely wrong but perhaps a whole host of little things that could add up to something major.

Euro - ok so that goes against everything that I've been told about amh. I thought it wasn't suppose to go up and especially in 2 years! Wow - that's just great news. But confirms my theory that it really isn't a reliable test so I wonder why some docs put so much emphasis on it.

Cos - let us know how your appt goes. I hope he has something useful to say.

Sea - good luck with the cytokine test results today.

No joy you are so Not Unreasonable. Your BiL can and should grieve, but he really ought to be a bit more considerate of your and Roy's story. I do think he's an unfeeling ass.

Yay for the AMH euro. That bodes well for your cycle.

And no mrsd we got no magic answers either. No idea why IVF worked, we are still unexplained, although IVF did get us over that hurdle. SB's contributions have improved over the years and my egg reserve was obviously good. We mainly found out that we do really well at the IVF-game.

Hope EC was ok, rabbit and that Boris is being injected as we speak!

We had good scan today and been released into normal care A midwife to find is now top of my list. And I treated lembie (now the size of a kumquat) to posh pregnacare instead of el cheapo folic acid...

Lemon- thrilled for you! You are now a normal preggo. That must feel odd! Thanks for thinking I anbu. He is a bit if an ass- that's what my mother said after I mentioned it to her.

wonderful news lemons . That must be so nice to classed as "normal". I'm so happy for you that all was well.

joy yanbu. You'd think they would realise now what a hard time you've been having. A mc at 16 weeks must have been awful, in the world of instaduffers I think you really don't feel that anything can go wrong so when it does it must be devastating and unexpected. I really do think we're champions. I've always thought of myself as being fairly weak but when I think back what we've been through I see that's not true. I know lots of couples would break under the pressure but mrden and I are stronger than ever. I also feel quite emotionally strong, and I've impressed myself with how my body has manged the physical side too. I've also learnt a lot about patience. I get so annoyed with a friend who moans that taking 3 months to conceive was a long time and she just couldn't stand it. She would tell me how stressful it was.

lemons I find it really interesting and heartening too that ivf could fix the problem even without knowing what the problem is. As an outsider looking in euro I agree with you that it's probably only a numbers game for you. And for you two joy. I think you've both just been extraordinarily unlucky so far. With my own situation, the rational part of me thinks the problem is with sperm numbers so icsi will sort us out. But, I have these niggling doubts that there is more going on. Even though I'm in the 2ww, I don't feel like I'm about to be pregnant. Or that anything is happening inside me at this moment. I've sort of forgotten that I'm pupo helped by the fact that I feel nothing unusual happening. I'm worried though that I will fall into that dark place again with another failure. OTD is a week today. I'll cave before then though so that I'm at least prepared but I'm not feeling in any rush to test.

rabbit I hope everything has gone ok.

sea good luck with the test.

Great news Lemon!

I have tons to say and comment on but will do that from PC tonight.

Wandering in, head down to say tat the winner of the 10plus wooden spoon goes to rabbit who managed to ovulate on her own a few hours ahead of egg collection. I have had iui. I feel in a very very bad place to have emerged from three surgeries now to worried looking consultants, hand holds, hugs and people saying they are so sorry and that I'm very very rare. In fact, I think I feel quite traumatised. Going into theatre after last years botch up was highly nerve wracking. As soon as I woke up I knew it had gone totally tits up. I guess iui is something to be salvaged but I think we can safely say I'd have been as good off having a shag. I almost felt like I was having an out of body experience as the nurse rattled off when to test - as if.

Can't do personals other than to say lemon and euro I'm glad there has been good ten plus news today too.

So so so sorry, Rabbit! Hand hold and hugs for you.

Massive bear hug for you rabbit. Did they offer any explanation as to how this happened? Did they get the timing wrong? If there were good numbers of sperm then they might just get to your egg, they'll be in the right place now.

Oh blimey rabbit. I know that's a risk, but what a bummer. Still, they have delivered the swimmers close to the egg, so you are in with a chance. How many hours before EC was your trigger? Massive hugs.

lemon that is brilliant news - you are a normal!

joy your BIL sounds like a bit of an idiot, severely lacking in empathy! His loss is awful, but that doesn't absolve him from his lack of caring about your and roy beforehand.

Must run now - have to do an interview.

rabbit super big hugs to you, I don't really know what to say, take time to be kind to yourself before deciding your next step

lemon congrats on being 'normal' yes go hither and find thy a midwife

euro did I not say that AHM can go up I think that it can change so much is why some clinics are moving away from using it. Roll on your scratch and next cycle

joy your BIL sounds a bit insecure and precious, those comments re friends and xmas just made my skin crawl if he mentions it again, I woudl be inclined to remind him that you can totally relate to the loss of a much wanted child !!! it is difficult listening to women who already have children talking about trying for another if they are struggling/miscarried I just want to scream be 'grateful for you already have' !!!

gin hope all went well

mrsd I can't really comment on the IVF thing I was relieved to get a so called 'answer' for my miscarriages but we didn't really have fertility investigations, just SA and AFC/AMH. I found conflicting advice from different clinics confusing, but I do believe IVF increased our chances of success especially since Barrys SA was up and down whether we could have used my own eggs and been successful will remain a mystery I still think we would never have managed it on our own.

Well Barry is back and the cat has become his shadow it would be cute if I wasn't so put out by the fact she was supposed to be my cat

wanders back in with cake and flowers

So much to catch up on and I know I will never manage to read back through everybody's news so just wanted to say

rabbits I am so gutted for you that Boris was a bit quick off the blocks and decided to take matters into his own hands like that. I honestly don't know what to say and can only imagine how you must feel to have been given that little gem of news in recovery. You don't seem to catch a break with all this. I hope that you are well enough tonight to be languishing on the couch & eating copious amounts of chocolate. Here's hoping that the IUI does the trick and you really can be a wonderful Ten Plussers tale of "you couldn't make it up" for all the right reasons!

lemons so happy for you that you had a good scan and have been reclassified as "normal"

gin Blimey, you are nearly there. It only feels like yesterday that you got your BFP.

den how are you? Not long now. About the IVF as a diagnositc tool for the unexplainedness I got no answers at all. Just "one of those things", possibly immature eggs, wrong drugs dosage, possibly egg quality...all about as clear as mud.

buzzy I did chuckle at Kayla being your cat! The dogs were supposed to be my babies but seem to not notice me when MrP comes in the door.

joy It seems really insensitive of your BIL to lean on Roy like that given your situation. It might be different if he was usually supportive of Roy and mindful of how much you have both been through yourselves in the baby stakes.

How did the interview go euro?

Thanks all. I triggered at 11.15pm on Monday and went to theatre at 12.15 ish today. I woke up this morning and felt distinctive ovulation pains and had a stress but thought I couldn't possibly be that unlucky

Trying to find some positives we did have a very good sperm sample with 97%rapid motility and through the ceiling count and my cervix was easy to navigate which is a big big relief as there had been talk of how to get the eggs back in bypassing the cervix which I think is problematic and lowers success rate. Dilation has obviously worked. Womb lining is good. So, I have great sperms, an accessible cervix and healthy lining now I just need me some eggs.

Trying very hard not to think about what on earth we will do next. It's tricky though.

Cos how was your review?

Pout!!! I am cheered up by your presence how are you doing you lovely person? Indeed to you couldn't make it up. My medical notes are of biblical width.

Reading online makes me think my retrieval was a bit late

Pout, hello so lovely to have you back. I was only thinking about you yesterday because I saw a friend and she calls her dogs big dog and little dog too when talking about them.

36 to 38 hours I was told rabbit.

Den I was reading how more than 36 is a bit dicey. I guess I'm looking for something to be cross with. And I think I was ovulating at 7 this morning if I'm honest. I guess if you have six follies and two pop you still have four. But Boris was a lone egg. Maybe he's still floating around in there and I can be a miracle story

Oh Rabbit - I am so desperately sorry. what a complete fuck up. I had no idea that trigger injections were so close to the wire. But it sounds like they were a bit late no? I am sorry it has ended up being so traumatising. I am glad you had IuI though but not much consolation after everything. Take a few weeks to come to terms with this shitty month. And it will have taken 10mins for the sperm to reach Boris so I will keep on hoping that they'll be making music now.

Poutster ! Lovely to hear from you. How have the last few months been? I hope you have been ok.

Mrsd- I quite agree about instadiffers. Also I just don't believe you have other hidden issues. You have to remember about all your frosties though. You have a lot of back ups there even if this doesn't go as it should. It's a much better outcome than first time around.

Buzz - yes that is a good comeback, I will remember that.

Rabbit, if you do get a bfp this month I think that will make you the biggest A* ever and the biggest two fingers to the fertility gods possible. You poor love, all we want is for one of these flipping 'experts' to say hey it's all looking great well done you. Well you made a big fat Boris and now he and Mr Rabbits swimmers are having a party in your pants, so fingers crossed! Keep going lovely.

Le Pout! Great to see you.

Lemons great news!

Euro great about the Amh, that's promising. And I like the win win approach to the job opportunity. News is supposed to come in 3's isn't it, what could be 3rd?!

Joy you are def nbu. That is quite staggering and I feel for Roy. You're right that you / we have coped with things other people just can't imagine.

MrsD Ivf hasn't really given us a definate diagnosis, just clues.

Review went as expected - its refreshing in a way for a dr to be adamantly against any new fad of medication and sticking to bog standard Ivf. He recommended higher doses of stimming and progesterone but dismissed anything else. We might do a round with him jan / feb.