The Elderberry Pavlovas skipping down the yellow brick road of positivity, thread 13 - lucky for some?!?

[Bunnygirlie]

The smallprint - Berries have a strict entrance criteria (TTC #1, over 30, TTC for 3+months, NO instadiffers, must have a special pot) and def no mention of baby dust or baby dancing UGH !!! Ooh we are strict...please note your house may be at risk if you do not keep up repayments lol

Hugs yorkie sorry you are feeling blue!

Although we all are so sensitive to any pg announcements it must also be odd for friends to tell us if they know we are struggling, maybe she didn't know what to say to you so avoided you. It's a horrible situation all round really.

I always count day 1 as the first full day of flo.

Yorkie, what an absolutely rotten day. For what it's worth, I would definitely count today as cd1 and record what you had yesterday as spotting.

Your friend's announcement was a little insensitive to include the scan picture, but at least they acknowledged your difficulties. It makes you wonder, what would be the ideal way to receive that news? I actually don't know as it utterly sucks whichever way you get it and, if I don't know, I suppose the one doing the announcing has no idea either!

boodle it's tricky, I used to always want my friends to tell me news (engagement pg etc) face to face but these days if somebody told me they were pg I fear I would burst into tears!

Thanks ladies for being lovely as always and your comments. It's so nice being able to come on here and know that people will listen, understand and offer advice. You're right it's hard for both parties regardless.

Anyway enough woe is me. It's a new day and off to see my football team play and hopefully win. Please!! What is everyone else up to today?

Agree with the other comments on here Yorkie about PG announcements and today being CD 1. My letter from the hospital this week specifically said that "day 1 is the day you wake up bleeding", therefore spotting from previous night wouldn't count in my interpretation.

yorkie agree with the other berries, today is day 1. Phew!
I don't think there is a nice way of saying it but inc the scan pic prob wasn't her best move!

Without sounding like a MASSIVE gimp......x-factor starts tonight....,,

Think I'll cook something nice for Dh and bm. Please inspire me!

Good luck with the test on Monday too Yorkie.

Ooh kitty you gimp! Lol I will probably watch the auditions but get bored by the time the live shows come round

Thanks gill

I'll probably watch initial rounds kitty but I'm more of a strictly come dancing lass When that starts that means its the run up to Xmas. Where has this shitty year gone?!

Yorkie. I'm ok thanks. I still had to test today, and I'm going to have to report the results of the test to the clinic on Monday.

Still, it might have failed this time, but we have two more goes and there is an outside chance of it happening naturally.

And Yorkie it's nice that your friends thought of you, but writing it from the baby is just sick making.

I'm a strictly fan too Yorkie.

I think it was a bit of a weird way for your friend to let you know, but she's obviously terrified of upsetting you and doesn't know how to approach it. I remember pouring my heart out last January to a friend who was also ttc, only for her to announce her pg a few weeks later, which clearly meant she knew she was pg when I was talking to her thinking she was going through the same. I was a little annoyed, but then decided I was being silly as she's not a close friend and if she didn't want to tell me before 12 weeks that was entirely her choice.

I'm now feeling really guilty on the other side. One of my best friends started ttc same time as us, 22 months ago. She's found it just as difficult as me. She made me promise to tell her if I got pg first even if she wasn't. But I just can't. I spoke to her a couple of days ago to tell her about the wedding and ask her to be a bridesmaid and she's just found out one tube is blocked and she's been diagnosed with a condition that means IVF isn't an option (I didn't understand it all, it's not a fertility related condition but it basically means her body couldn't cope with IVF). She directly asked me if I had baby news and I couldn't tell her. But if I do get to 12 weeks I'll obviously have to tell her then, and she'll be upset I didn't tell her before. I'm still not convinced I'll get to 12 weeks which is why I don't want to upset her when it's so early. It's a hard one.

BOOOOOOAAAAAKKKKKKK

Sorry ladies, I have to disagree- using this way to tell yorkie is bloody awful. It's cheesy and insensitive and trying to be so cutesie. Just bollocks. I am appalled on your behalf. If she was really being sensitive to you yorkie she would have sent you a very gentle message explaining that its am awkward thing but she wanted to let you know and she'd love to see you soon. As an adult.

Rant over. Hi everyone else x x

I can't wait till Strictly!!!!! Not long to go!!!

I think waiting till 12 weeks is very sensible barking but then tell your friend straight away so she isn't upset you didn't tell her x

I've changed my mind, I agree with thunder. Well put thunder, she could definitely have been more of an adult instead of resorting to childish nonsense.

STRICTLY!!! Yeeeeeeeeeraaaaah!

thunder that's what I thought too but I'm not really a cutesie kind of person so did think maybe I just didn't get it.

barking I'm so sorry to hear what a tough time your friend is going through - it sounds horrible. On the other side I wouldn't expect anyone to tell me their pg news before 12 weeks and I think when it comes to it and you explain that she will come to understand. For me the best thing is to email/text then you give them time to digest the info on their own, acknowledge how shit it is for them and give them time to respond. To be fair to my mate she did all those things but spoilt it with the baby talking and scan picture.

I'm sooooo excited about strictly too!

pip we're here if you need to rant. Glad to hear you're thinking about things objectively and looking ahead. Did they say how long till you can try again?

So anybody else on the 2ww with me?!?

Hellooooo!

I'm back from my holiday, where I only went and climbed Helvellyn and crossed Striding Edge LIKE A BOSS. This is such an unlikely (and totally unplanned) thing for me to have done I don't think I'll ever get over telling people I managed it.

It's also better news than my FSH result that I returned to. My eggs are now definitely in the "overcooked" category. Seems three years of TTC has been too much for my poor ovaries to bear and they're giving up! Rubbish. Anyway, we'll see what the fertility clinic make of that. I can join the ranks of those having their pre-treatment consultations in the next couple weeks!

You guys have chatted a LOT, so catching up is hard work.

I'm gutted for you, pip. I hope the next steps are positive feeling ones!

Ugh at the mode of the announcement yorkie. I do think there is a sensitive way to share this news with friends - I've had friends get it "right" with me - and sending you a missive from the womb doesn't count as one in my book. Sounds like her heart was in the right place, though.

Oof, barking, tough one about you telling your friend. If it were me, I think I'd suck it up and tell her as soon as possible, but it depends on how close you are, and if you'll be telling other close, mutual friends but not her. I guess if she's going to feel hurt by your news, it won't hurt any less the longer you leave it to tell her. Still, you need to do what feels most right to you.

Good luck to those in the 2WW, and PUPO, and suchlike. (Hurrah for your follies, kitty!) Still shag week here, and the OPK is reading high.

Yorkie, presumably she was trying to keep it lighthearted but she obviously doesn't have a clue.
Bunny, I'm still just in the 2WW but not for long, temp dropped this morning.
Pip, that guardian article you posted on the IVF thread (just lurking there until I actually start) has just made me cry, I wish I could post it on FB to make people understand but unfortunately there are too many of my husband's family on there who don't know our circumstances.
Rum, sorry to hear about your FSH results, but well done on the holiday achievements!

Just seen that after X Factor tonight there's a new, updated version of Through the Keyhole. Might have to watch that, I remember seeing it as a child with Lloyd Grossman and I'd never heard of any of the so-called celebrities! Of course, that was in a world before Heat magazine etc.

If I ever have a baby, I will never post a FB pic with the caption, "Welcome to the world, baby Blahblah" (or name my child Blahblah)

lady omg I'm dying to get my own back on the world and shove my theoretical new baby in everyone's faces! (excluding berries of course!). I've cooed over enough newborns and scan pictures and bought too many new baby presents to mention! I'm claiming 'my turn' with a vengeance if I ever get it yorkies friend however needs a good slap!

Sorry yorkie but eurgh at your friend! My sister had a similar issue with her friend, in terms of the friend getting diffed first, but her F just came round for a cuppa, and said "I have some good news, but I know you're going to find it tough. I'm pg. if you feel like you don't want me around so much, I'll understand, but I would love to share this time with you because you're my friend and it is special and also scary for me."

Bit cheesy but sensitive I thought. Cards from babies, pets, cherished items of furniture etc are relentlessly naff.

One day, yorkie, you will have a baby AND good taste, whereas your friend ....

Just wanted to check in with you all. I haven't caught up properly yet, but will do over the next couple of days. Been thinking of you all & hoping for good news.
Had af while on hols, so bizarre cramps were pmt. boo hiss!
Fwiw re the unborn foetus sending an email, I think people take leave of their senses when it comes to babies and weddings. Ordinarily sane, reasonable people suddenly morph into insensitive idiots.

Now I'm off to bed. Promise to write more after the weekend.

Charming's back! Yay! I want to hear about 'cat cam'!

yorkie you're silly friend made me think of my friend (who I've kinda fallen out with for telling me about her pregnancy on fb). Anyway, realised I'm being silly so just texted her and she's mega stressed atm so could prob do with a friend!