The Elderberry Pavlovas skipping down the yellow brick road of positivity, thread 13 - lucky for some?!?

[Bunnygirlie]

The smallprint - Berries have a strict entrance criteria (TTC #1, over 30, TTC for 3+months, NO instadiffers, must have a special pot) and def no mention of baby dust or baby dancing UGH !!! Ooh we are strict...please note your house may be at risk if you do not keep up repayments lol

Oh no Bunny what have you done? I'll never get anything done now!
Roaring at this:

"I thought it would be funny to go down the stair on dds plastic rocking horse....... it wasn't I thought I had broken my fanjo bone and had plastic friction burns down there that result in some funny walking, sitting and getting up manoeuvres, the shame dds were all watching at the time"

I know! what about wiping with loo roll with a wasp on it OUCH!

Oh I haven't got that far yet! DP is whinging he wants his dinner. Will have to catch up with the rest later!!

F*&@ing hilarious!!! I liked the karati chop into the Lego tower one!!!!

Guys, just how bad is it to keep 'midwives' on virgin because they'd be my midwives if I ever actually have a baby because its the same hospital??? Do I need a wang for it or is it ok????

Hmmmm it's a tricky one kitty I don't think I would watch it if I were you!

bunny oh it's worse than that.. I've watched it! I'm wondering whether to keep it so that I can incessantly obsess over it when Dh isn't it

DELETE!

I loved the 'I pooed on my skirt at work today' thread. So funny.

Here it is: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/mumsnet_classics/a1439461-I-pooed-on-my-skirt-at-work-today

Oh my god, the 'pooed on my skirt' thread is really funny. I read it a few months ago and there is a mortifying one about someone who ended up being locked out of a flat...I'm not saying any more as I don't want to spoil it for anyone if they're reading it.

I'm still working (and getting quite a lot done, but the list seems to be getting longer so I'm no closer to finishing) so I am not opening any of those threads!!! I read a lot of the wedding one last time someone deliberately stole some of my life linked to it on here. I think my first wedding would be up there, but I daren't share any of it as it would be immediately recognisable to anyone who was there!

The being locked out of a flat is an urban legend... Don't think it's quite true that it happened to the poster. However still makes me laugh/squirm

Damn it. Knew it was too good to be true. A bit like the 'thin man' story in the paranormal thread.

Barking, I should be working but I've packed it in and started a baking project instead! Oops!

Boodle There is an article in this months Fortean Times about Slenderman!

Barking I literally haven't done a thing for school. We have 2 Inset days plus a staggered start so won't really be teaching properly until Thursday so am kidding telling myself I have plenty of time yet.

Still ploughing my way through the accidents thread. Have tears rolling down my face at the octopus story. DP is wondering what the hell is wrong with me!!

happy I have at last finished the accident thread, now I can go to bed! Ace innit!

Pip, is the article worth a read? What's it about? (If it's possible to summarise?) There's something very creepy about Slenderman but I can't put my finger on what it is; paranormal stuff generally passes over my head. (I grew up in a very old house with some spooky aspects to it. Never fazed me!)

I'm off the read the latest posts on the accident thread. Would like to add a couple myself as I've got two ridiculous stories, but they would completely out me.

Ha!!! The poo thread is hilarious! I have a story though (about my best mate's weird ex housemate not me, I might add!)

My bm was in the bath one day and her hm needed a poo. Rather than just ask my bm to get out the bath, she pooed on a piece of newspaper! To my bms horror, she thought it was hilarious! Then her weird boyfriend said, 'that's crazy, why didn't you just poo in the cat's litter tray?!!!

How does that make it any better?!!

Sorry ladies need to come on here and have a rant. V bad day yesterday and feeling v down.

Went to a wedding yesterday and it should have taken us 3.5 hrs to drive, instead it took nearly 7 hrs due to traffic. Arrived in hotel to be greeted by start of AF a day early meaning it will be CD 4 on Monday and possibly too late to get my fsh test done. If it isn't done in time for my fc appt a week on Monday they will send me off and I'll have to
Wait another 3 months for another appt with no answers!!! Grrrrrrrr. Do you think I should still get it done anyway?

Anyway went to wedding and got drunk to commiserate and came back at 2 in the morning to be greeted by email from best mate telling me she's pregnant. She's pretty much ignored me for the past couple of months since I told her about us struggling to get pg and now Ive realised why. Actually it's more the way it was done that's got to me and I can't work out if I'm being too sensitive so would appreciate your thoughts. She's written it as though its come from her baby e.g. Hello Auntie Yorkiebilb, just writing to introduce myself. Mummy and Daddy didnt know how to tell you, get in touch when you're ready blah blah with a picture of the scan at the bottom. I am being too sensitive aren't I? I just wish she'd written it from her as the sentiment of the message is nice plus I wish she'd been in contact sooner I guess. Last time I saw her I cried at her house over my fsh result and then I didn't hear anything from her apart from one text message to say she was off on her hols.

Anyway sorry for the rant - just had a v bad day

really sorry for the woe is me message!

yorkie you could have prob got it done privately if you'd had some more time. Don't think you should get it done but you could always call and check first thing mon.

Re your mate, yes, I'd be annoyed at it coming from her unborn foetus but at least she still told you rather than let you find out on fb (that's what my friend did) or from someone else. I guess most people just have no idea what it's like to eternally wait for a baby and then have other people smeared in your face all the time. There's no point in falling out with her though, you'll only lose a friend and be even more upset.

What might help though is if I send in my vomming cat!!! I think we had this on a thread before you joined us but my cat went to stay with my mate when I went on hols a few months ago. When she changed her fb profile to her 'bikini bump' (which CRUSHED me) she vommed all over her floor... Mwuhahaha

Thanks kitty Aah you're the one with the vomming cat! I wasn't sure who to ask. Can I pay a bit extra for by noon delivery of the cat!

You're right about my mate I think I'm more hurt I didn't hear anything from her after my cry at hers. It was a weird scenario. I got upset, went to the bathroom and my DH came up to check on me, calmed down and went back downstairs and no one mentioned it. I guess I know why now.

Re my AF. I'm confused about whether yesterday was spotting or not hence if it should be counted as day 1. Sorry tmi here I had brown stuff when I wiped at 7 and went on my pad, which went a bit redder about 11ish then full blood flow when I got up this morning. Is day 1 today or yesterday eve then?

The rule when I had to report day one for IVF was if it was after 6pm then you count it as the next day.

Therefore I would say it was this morning.

Thanks pip how are you doing?