We laugh in the face of OPKS and stomp on our thermometers! Don your customised shag capes, ladies; it's Just Shagging Thread 15

[Bearface]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
   
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
   
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
   
4. Thou shalt share and with your fredmates where needed.
   

JSing lingo;

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others.

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce in other posters).

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in!

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession.

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

The link to Part 14 is here: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/1674505-Out-with-the-OPKs-ban-the-body-temping-heres-Just-Shagging-thread-14

The link to the latest grads thread is here:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/1699553-Shagged-Out-Viroids-7th-Thread-From-conception-to-birth-living-proof-that-JSing-really-does-work

Happy shagging shaggers!

[cookielove]

Well the rate that your posting it may be a bit sooner lil

[lil1ady]

stupid phone went weird on me! sorry about that, must have been all the excitement of a new Fred!

[DulcetMoans]

Haha. We will get there quicker if you keep doing that lil!

What a beautiful day!!

[EssieSaysRelax]

haha I wondered what had happened then!

Morning everyone. What a lush day. I got up at 6 and went and picked up horse poo . It was lovely and peaceful and I saw a hare and a fox!

Hope everyone has a lovely weekend in the sunshine. xx

[Minion]

Morning girls !
How's everyone on this fine Friday morning?
Nothing much new to report here at minions except ding dong the witch has gone and one shall be donning shag cape, boots and all other pieces of succubi alluring regalia soonish.
On another note, I have my first ever house viewing tonight, it's with the owners themselves so want to ask questions but don't want to insult them etc.
Any good tips to ask, things to avoid and so on?
Tia!

[commsgirl]

Morning! Beautiful day. I'm in an awful mood and definitely feel like ertd is on its way. Boo.

minion good luck this month!

[Redshoes56]

Morning, all! Just catching up. MrsBri! Hope you are still hanging around to see this hearty ?yay!? on the birth of Amy Alice. I remember when you got your BFP ? I can?t believe it?s been 9 months?

I absolutely love the cliffhanger blow job idea, teehee. This month, we skipped all foreplay just in case saliva was doing in his sperm. Alas, that doesn't seem to have helped as I've been spotting for two days and I am pretty sure ERTD is coming full on today. So, comms, joining you in awful mood land. I am going to call today for my referral appointment.

[commsgirl]

red is saliva affecting sperm a real thing? I know nothing!

[Redshoes56]

Apparently, comms - it creates a "hostile" environment for sperm from what I've read, but then again, so does the whole damn vagina, which seems like a colossal joke on womankind. I always figured if the sperm weren't smart enough to get past the blockades, my egg didn't need 'em, but after a year....you'll try anything! :D

[Bearfacedchic]

Hello all! Feeling sunny today!

Ugh to Ertd Red.

Don't know if I'm too late Minion but my advice is always look up I case of cracks in walls or ceiling. Ask how old the boiler is and what type in case it might need replacing. Ask what work they've had done on the property recently. Askif the loft or cellar is boarded in case you want to use it for storage. Ask what the neighbours are like and watch their faces for any sign of hesitation(!) or anything else. Hope this helps. I'm quite forward with stuff like this but I want to know what I'm getting and think you have every right to ask as a potential buyer. Good luck!

[Bearfacedchic]

Ps. My boobs feel huge! I feel like Barbara Windsor. For thevpurposes of our glossary, we could call this Having a Babs Moment or Doing a Babs. I would like to submit my phrase please to the Shaggers Phrase Book.

[commsgirl]

Well you learn something new every day. Might give it a few more months before sharing that gem of information with dp!

Just had dinner in the garden with the flies and the puppy trying to eat snails. Was almost relaxing!

[commsgirl]

bear my boobs are also Doing a Babs (love it!) complete with stabbing sensations. Lucky us!

[frogchops]

Minion..... Hope I'm not too late, but check the kitchen drawers! There appears to be four in our kitchen, but when we moved in, three are just for show! One draw in a kitchen isn't enough! Also ask which boundaries are theirs and where the access to sewage pipes are/manholes. The lovely/stupid people before us built a conservatory over the sewage access so when there's a loo blockage...we just have to hope for the best or the conservatory is coming down!

[frogchops]

Also ask where the sun comes up in the mornings.... To be able to plan summer sunny breakfasts!

[DulcetMoans]

Yeah, tell us about the house minion!

Doing a babs could work, never been one of my symptoms though!

I think I might try positive thinking as a tactic this month. I am going to believe we will get pregnant this month and then we will! Right? ERTD nearly done with me, onto the shagging!

[Bearfacedchic]

Comms- I felt like my boobs were sticking out a mile as I walked down the road earlier paranoid android hope yours are for a good reason BFP

Does anyone know how I can embed a link on here? So you know when people put up 'here' and the link is to whatever they want rather than the full URL?

[Rockchick1984]

Bear you do www.mumsnet.com here without the spaces before and after the [ thingies. Obviously substitute mumsnet with the website you're trying to link to :) Why are you doing a Babs, when is ERTD due?

[ChocChaffinch]

big boobs can be a sign

[Bearfacedchic]

I don't know to be honest. Boobs feel bigger like once a year at Christmas when I've eaten too much but today they felt ginormous. I don't think it is a sign anything though.

Thanks Rock for the info. I may use it to good effect tomorrow.

[Bearfacedchic]

Oh yes sorry Rock. Ertd is due in 8 days or so.

And the evil cold has shuffled off again so I'm feeling fighting fit and cycled 16km this evening.

[lil1ady]

bear I hope it is a sign something. I guess if nothing else u must have great looking boob's right now

[Nessalina]

Hi guys! Hope all is well with everyone, I've been AWOL for a day or two, just catching up. Proper lolled at the Cliffhanger Blowjob! Sneaky! Heheh! It would sooo working my fella. Well, I'm CD14 today, think I could be ovulating soon (contraband is getting progressively darker, though not a full line yet!), so we donned the cape yesterday! DH has a stinking cold tonite, but I put on my best comedy seduction routine and he fell for it! Bless him. I will so have his cold tomorrow

[frogchops]

I just lolled at the cliffhanger!! My DP would wonder what the hell had happened! I didn't even do that in my upduff me NOW TTC days. He often recalls though, how I was a sex hungry beast psychotic tccer, pre preg compared to now

[AndieDisestablishment]

Awwwwww, congrats MrsBri, if you're still about to read this. Can't believe 9 months went so fast.

Bear Hope the boobs are a sign.

I'm off to London Film and Comic Con today. Hoping the proximity to Norman Reedus and Jason Momoa will spur my ovaries into action.lol