We laugh in the face of OPKS and stomp on our thermometers! Don your customised shag capes, ladies; it's Just Shagging Thread 15

[Bearface]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share and with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo;

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others.

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce in other posters).

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in!

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession.

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

The link to Part 14 is here: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/1674505-Out-with-the-OPKs-ban-the-body-temping-heres-Just-Shagging-thread-14

The link to the latest grads thread is here:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/1699553-Shagged-Out-Viroids-7th-Thread-From-conception-to-birth-living-proof-that-JSing-really-does-work

Happy shagging shaggers!

Cookie- you can have a period but not ovulate as it's happened to me and it has been confirmed by blood tests at the docs. I think technically the blood is not referred to as menstrual (I think- please feel fee to correct me peeps) but it will still seem like a period. Everyone has anovulatory cycles now and then. After my test I ov'd the following month again confirmed by blood tests. If you missed a few days of contraband Cookie then you can't say for sure. Plus, to add something else into the mix, and please don't all scream at me here but opks are not a definitive test of ov because sometimes the body can release hormones in a build up to ov but then drop before it happens. This can happen several times in a cycle too. I found all this out from the Toni Weschler book recommended by someone on here. It's worth a read. I learnt about temping too but am too lazy and rushed in the morning to do it. Hence Jsing!

Ha! Genuine LOL at Essie and the bow-tie factor

Sorry to hear theres SPG Andie - fingers crossed for it NOT being the ERTD incoming!

Dulcet, maybe you need to have a serious chat with your DH and make sure you're on the same page with how quickly you'd like to conceive. He may have no idea how much it gets you down when each month goes by, and I'm sure if he did he'd do his best to get on board with the DTD Plan! My DH was really shocked when I told him that a egg can only live 12 hours in some cases, so delaying a shag because you're sleepy isn't an option unless you want another month out the window. I am guilty of just jumping him when he's reluctant I have to say I find guilt doesn't work on him, he just feels pressured and pissed off and unsexy. Horny wife jumping him is much more likely to have the right result!

Thanks for the link bear, will look at that when I'm on the computer. I sent him some NHS stats earlier but a timeline would be good.

Thanks nessa, I am trying not to overwhelm him with pressure but he does need a better grasp of how this all works. I know it's what he wants but, I don't know, he's not as involved as I am as its in my body I guess. He didn't even realise it had been 10 unsuccessful cycles! Sigh. We'll get there!

Thanks for the commiserations on my weirdly out of sync body.lol Ness ERTD came and went last weekend (if you could call it ERTD, more like evil red trickle of doom)

Shattered today. How I everyone?

Dulcett Maybe once DH sees a timeline of events he'll understand it more. My DP knows there's a "window" but feels pressured if I'm too persistent during that time so I try and space the loving out. Although that's not been getting me anywhere as its been 9 months now (about 7 cycles).

Oh woe is me. ERTD has appeared somewhat early. Buggery. At least it's sunny here though.

Hi ladies - I seem to be having a weird old month, I'm on CD18 but this month don't recall much pant snot or any ovulation cramps which I usually get. It was only just now that I realised what cycle day I'm on so wondering if we'd done it enough to get my eggo preggo.

Anyway, today is the 1st anniversary of my younger brothers death so I've been up since 3am skyping with my family back home. Feel totally flat - not sure I'm worried that much about being pregnant as I am about getting through this week....

Stupid ERTD Bear - at least the sun is out for you, there's thunder and lightning scaring my toddler at the moment here

Stroke so sorry for your loss Try not to worry about ovulation this month, you clearly have bigger things to focus on at the moment, unless the distraction helps. DH lost his dad recently and has thrown himself into redecorating the house as (for him) he's better if he doesn't have "thinking time".

Oh Stroke I'm sorry to hear that. Look after yourself.

Sorry to hear that Stroke - take it easy
I have been a massive fool and POAS today! Not a shock that it was a BFN. Literally weed a fiver down the loo . Not cracking again til Monday yeah, I know that's what I said before!

bear thanks for the info grrrr that ertd got you

Stroke sorry for your loss!!

Nessa I caved too and poas yesterday also a neg. I am not due on till mon so I will try and be strong and not poas.

I've become strangely addicted to watching live pregnancy test on youtube

Nessa get yourself onto amazon and buy tons of cheapies!! Mine arrived 2 days after I ordered them!

Cookie did your opk's ever change? Didn't know there was live pregnancy testing on YouTube - do you have to see other people wee??? That just seems wrong!

rock erm they got lighter and darker but all faint if that makes sense.

Sometimes you see them dip the sticks into pots but mist of thar was done off camera. I think its nice to see a positive like it can actually happen

I am currently lying in bed avoiding going to the loo, as I think ertd is here

Did you get up in the end cookie? Hope she's not here for you!

I didn't realise you could see that on the YouTube, might have to research that. Saves the endless amounts of wedding stuff I research, will make a change!

Hi ladies, just back from a quick trip to Newport, Rhode Island; a girlfriend from college was graduating from naval officer training, so I attended that and also snuck in some sightseeing. I always hope that when I disappear for a few days, I?ll come back to a pile of BFPs; boo to visits from nasty aunts of the Flo variety.

Stroke - sorry for your loss. My husband lost his younger brother last year, and although it?s gotten easier to cope as time has passed, it?s still very, very hard. Nothing I can say will help. Hang in there .

Lil, I think you are spot on about stress delaying ovulation, if not actual fertility ? I was definitely ovulating later in my cycle when I was in the midst of grad school work.

Live pregnancy testing on YouTube sounds intriguing. All modesty goes out the window while TTC, I guess!

So DH took it upon himself to do the mantraband while I was out of town. He passed (I was alerted by text message; he also left the test sitting on the bathroom sink for me when I got home. Romantic ). He?s pretty pleased to know that the boys are coming to the party. We still don?t know if they are wimpy or lack sense of direction, but getting good news about at least the sperm count has given him confidence and renewed his enthusiasm about TTC, so I?d say the experience was very positive.

I was kind of bummed I was away when he did the test because I wanted to, ahem, give him a hand and micromanage observe the process. (Bear I totally do think he was stalling, like you said, but maybe because he wanted to be alone when he got the results, in case he was bummed?) First, he had to get all the man juice in a tiny cup, and let it sit for 20 minutes to liquefy. Then it is combined with a solution in a plastic bottle. Once that was done, he had to put exactly six drops (no more, no less) from the bottle onto the test strip and wait seven minutes.

He was sure to say, ?The test line was fainter than the control line -- but the instructions said that?s positive no matter what!? LOL. Yes, honey, a line is a line. Welcome to the club .

Red Hurrah for the little swimmers! I love that he probably has a little more idea of what you go through each time you POAS!!!

Rock I know that I can buy cheaper, but I feel like it's defeatist in some way to buy a job lot on Amazon... it sort of feels like I'm saying " Yeah I'm not gonna get knocked up any time soon"!! Or... maybe I should put my faith in The Law of Sod and buy 100, so that I get a BFP on the 1st one!

Cookie It's just too tempting isn't it? I'm not due on til Thursday, so don't know what the heck I was thinking!! I'm gonna test on Monday with a First Response. Fingers crossed for your ERTD fears being unfounded...

Nessa - exactly! Men should have to experience that horrible wait in the bathroom just like the rest of us.

I'm feeling the same way about splurging on the $$$ electronic fertility monitor on Amazon. Spending all that money is like admitting success is so far off -- but maybe I'll invite fate to throw a BFP my way and waste my hard earned cash !

I got up, well for a couple hours any way. I am back in bed [lazy]

My fears were unfounded no ertd for me, for now anyone. Loads of typo's in last message I'll blame the phone.

red glad your dh's swimmers are swimming! !

well ertd has arrived 2 days early grr. this means this month I had a 26 day cycle....

whilst its crap it arrived, it was much nicer bit plotting and obsessing this month- it's made things much more natural.

sorry to hear about other bfn, ertds and bad anniversaries- we don't seem to have much luck onthis thread...

It is tough to stay positive, coffee, but we must believe that the JSing method will work for us when the time is right .

tries to join Red in the Zen Zone Ommmmmmmm

Thank you all for your very kind words - my brother's facebook page has been bombarded with messages from his friends and loved ones and my family and I had constant support during the course of yesterday. Wine and chocolate was a big help by the end of the day!
Red my condolences on the loss of your BIL. I feel for your DH, it is such a hard time. I agree that it becomes easier to cope in that the raw stabbing pain eases but it gives way to a sense of hollowness that never goes away.

Coffee sorry ERTD got you - I haven't partaken in any contraband so far but I think if we haven't gotten a bfp by end of July I might get a couple of opks just to check I'm actually ovulating! No 2WW for me, I'm paying no attention until ERTD shows up! Or bfp of course...

God my grammar has been appalling

hopes to god, that grammar was the right word to use

Stroke we are a few years ahead of you, my Dh lost his lovely sister several years ago (around 9 years ago), he lives, he loves but he will never be the same again.

coffee sadness!!

Red-I'm so glad the troops are going what they're supposed to. That must be a relief. Hope you had a good time sightseeing.

Stroke- it's good that you felt supported and it's lovely to see so many other people care too. Hopefully that was something of a comfort to you. I lost my dad when I was fairly young and it does get easier as others have said but it's true there's an emptiness.

Coffee- sorry ertd got you.

We've got nightmare family arriving imminently and I have The Fear. I've asked DH to bash me over the head so I wake up in a day or two. or guess I could head to the Zen Zone too? Budge up then. . .

sorry to those of you dealing with loss

interested in all of these cycle linked acronyms -
anyone got a min to type a vocab?
I know that most cycles are betwixt 28-35 days? what's the lutein thing? and the actual window is 3 days pre something...
looking at maximising our chances through 'smarter shagging'

Choc very brief explanation - LH is the hormone that your body releases prior to ovulation. When you ovulate the egg can only live for 12-24 hours, however his little swimmers can last up to 5 days in you so ideal time to DTD is the days in the run-up to ov. Opk's can test for LH however they are contraband on here as we are supposed to be just shagging so we don't rely on gubbins and whatnots to tell us when we ovulate. An average woman with an average 28 day cycle will ovulate on day 14 (day 1 is first day of period, AF or ERTD depending on what you like to refer to it as) however obviously very few women are average so basically the best way to do it is to try and shag as often as you can Hope that helps a bit