TRC 10+ months. Part 15...

[MuddyWellyNelly]

New thread for the lovely 10+ers. 14 was awesome so another like that please!

nelly Kayla now has food stuck to her nose, she is not keen on me laughing at her, I don't think she likes Barry being away, well if I can't cope with cat I won't cope with a baby, your plan sounds good, when do you think you'll have your next round??

Hi all. I too am sorry to see so many of you lovely ladies in the tent. I know I found last summer between ivf #1 and #2 really hard. I planned lots of nice treats, but found them tinged with sadness. Lots of luffs, cakes and wines to you all.

sea sounds like you are having a particularly shitty time, with nasty side affects from the meds, fringed babies taunting you and a+ announcements. You are doing everything you can to prepare yourself for the ivf and I very much believe you will get there.

euro FFS re the test results. Part of my RL job involves information management and every time I went to the clinic I was itching to sort out their shambolic system. Re your good follie being spoiled, I'm sure it will be fine as you are on the antagonist. With my last cycle my lead follicle ended up as a cyst, presumably as I was waiting for the others to catch up. However it's one of those other follicle's egg that's now the bean, so even if your follicle goes over, please don't worry about the others being not such good quality. Good luck for tomorrow! Are you off work next week at all?

Ha ha ha at roomy critter! Although at a manual exam. I thought that was all over now until towards the end. So pleased everything is going ok.

rabbits I totally agree with what everyone else has said re booze. I drank until ET during the FET and the nurse told me 7 units a week was fine and it was important to hold into something of my normal life. I think it'd take downing a bottle of wine a night to really fuck up our fertility. And I really hate the way people like Zita west put all this pressure on women ttc to change their diet and making them feel like it's their fault if they don't conceive.

lemons hope all is going well on the druks.

pout Mr P sounds exactly like Dave who has said to me on numerous occasions 'well, we can't do anything about it so there's no point worrying', although I suspect he was secretly depressed about it all. Bloody men! All I wanted was a few comforting words. I love your dog stories. Always make me chuckle. A 40 min poo?!

Waves to buzz. Our fur baby was somehow crouched on top of a stick in her cage, looking like she was using it as a gun!

madness hope you are doing ok.

sar hope you are starting to feel better. I think illnesses last longer when preggo, as the immune system in suppressed. And btw, I certainly do not remember you having wide hips!!

cosmos are you starting your FET cycle soon?

Waves, luffs, cakes and wines to everyone else.

Not much to report here. We're off on hols next week and can't wait. I've not had a whole week off since Xmas. Bring on the sunshine!

Hi everyone. I have finally read enough to catch up a bit after my conference this week where I was unplugged from the internet.

I am sorry to hear so many people are in the tent and had scares.

sea I really hope you start feeling better, your side effects from the Tb drugs sound grim.

Euro - Good luck with the EC tomorrow.

Pout - your hubby sounds like mine did through the whole process. He was stressed but tried to play it cool the whole time.

critter - I laughed pretty heard when I read the roomy comment from the midwife. Hopefully that means you will have minimal issues at the pushing stages.

Buzzy - My heart dropped when I read about your scare - I couldn't be happier that you got to hear the heartbeat and everything is moving along nicely.

Sar - So sorry to hear you still feel icky. I hope it subsides soon.

Gin - Its amazing that you're so far along already.

Princess - Congratulations on the lovely nearly 10 lb baby!

Art - I am sorry to hear about your scare. You made me feel much more normal talking about how the stress and nervousness doesn't quite go away after a loss and long term ttc.

Rabbit - I agree with everyone about the booze. I doubt a little will hurt. I think they just don't want you to binge excessively.

Lemon - I hope the drugs are going alright.

Big waves and paw squeezes to anyone I may have missed. I am going to go run some errands while it is pouring rain.

AFM - I managed to present to a roomful of about 300 people this week without having a nervous breakdown I am very proud of myself. I also had my 12+1 appointment yesterday - the nurse went through 3 veins before managing to collect my blood sample, but it was worth it when we got to hear the heartbeat for the first time. I finally believe there is something in there. The nuchal translucency ultrasound is on Tuesday.

Oh and by present I mean speak. I am still exhausted by the 12+ hour days at the conference all week.

pout I love your dog stories, Kayla believes the bed is mine between certain times ant that I should vacate it as it is 'her time' she didn't like us having a nap before and she is still in a funny and 'talkative mood' so if you don't get your pre IVF BFP will in cycle Colin ???

sweet well done on you presentation, I hate public speaking, yay to hearing a heartbeat, I can sympathise on the veins front, I had IV on Friday where she couldn't find any veins, it took 3 attempts and we had to use the back of my hand, faints at the mere mention of it she was quite good and i'm hardly bruised, I didn't press hard nough on one of them after she took the IV out, next thing you know there is blood everywhere, I didn't think so much could come out of an arm vein lucily she had given me one of those Kylie sheets which is usually used for bed wetters

buzz the tests valid for my first round have expired, so I had thm repeated in Jan (the old ones expired in Feb). It got even worse this morning. Having emailed the results last night, they called me late morning today to say that the GP had missed one! Cue, panicked dash to Harley St for both of us to get blood taken, and then frantic calls to the clinic when the receptionist told us that the results usually take 2 days. I haven't heard anything this evening, so I just hope they got the results through. I really could do without this extra stress.

pout sorry for Mr p's lack of understanding.

Hmmm gin so exactly what I fear happening happened to you? That doesn't fill me with confidence (although I know you got your BFP). I so wish I had just stuck to natural (and had the ability to just say no).

I completely hear you on the diet stuff. There was a discussion yesterday on the egg buddies thread about cutting out chocolate due to the caffeine. There's so much pressure on women in this whole process.

sweet that appointment sounds brilliant. Good luck for the nuchal!

I've had 4 blood tests in 8 days, and there will be more needles tomorrow. Luckily they don't bother me too much (although I am not keen on the back of the hand ).

I cannot wait for EC to be over. Only 12 hours to go now. I hate everything about this process. I thought my attitude might have mellowed in light of the fact that it got me pregnant last time, but not at all. I am hating every single minute of this process.

Jeez Euro that sounds like a nightmare stress. Keep going not long now till you'll have done the hardest bit - have a nice glass of wine lined up tomorrow night. Best of luck.

Gin thanks for your encouragement before by the way, I should get going with FET July time so transfer back prob end aug if they defrost ok.

Just a quick one to say good luck to euro today. So sorry to read about the last minute stress. Now that's all done. Best of luck today.

Sorry for the short post. Will catch up with everyone soon x

Just popping in to say good luck for EC euro. I hope the bloody clinic get their act together and it goes ahead. If not, I'll come down there and go ape shit with you.

Ps my cyst was clearly visible on dildo cam scans at least 5 days before EC, so I'm sure your follicle will be fine.

euro I hope all went well today with EC :)

Thanks for all the good wishes. I'm back home. Fuck me that was traumatic. They did at least get me in and out quickly this time. They had the self discharge form ready for me...

They gave me something different to bring me round to see if I would be less panicky and liable to run away. It was awful. It had me in floods of tears. I felt like the world was going to end although I had no idea why. I prefer the anxiety. And last time there was no pain afterwards. This time I feel like I've been been kicked by a particularly vicious donkey. I'm now at home on the sofa with a blanket and hot water bottle feeling somewhat sorry for myself.

There was one (with hindsight) funny moment. Last time, as I was being put under the nurse was strapping my legs into the stirrups, so it was the last thing I saw. I had flashbacks for a week afterwards. This time as she started doing it, my heartrate went MENTAL. You know when you're getting to close to something and the parking sensors pretty much flatline? Like that. All of the medical staff started looking panicked, and I ended up reassuring them that it was ok. I said it was the straps, explained what happened last time and asked them to just please knock me out and get on with it, asap. They did.

He got 4 eggs, all from the right side. The left is difficult to reach apparently. I'm a bit miffed because there were follies there at the last scan and he retrieved from the left last time. I don't know if they are mature yet. Presumably they will call later.

Now the pain is easing, my appetite has returned. I have a much longed for bacon and fried egg sarnie on order with mr e. :)

euro glad things were ok :)

I just myself for not taking this in my stride. I'm normally quite a tough cookie who can deal with anything, but I can't deal with this at all.

*hate

Euro - I'm glad things went ok. Try not to be too hard on yourself - go enjoy your bacon and egg sarnie.

Yay euro 4 eggs is amazing for a couple of days of stims. Most people only get that with a full mild ivf cycle. Shame about your left ovary - maybe it was hiding more this time? And no hating yourself for your reaction. It's a bloody hard thing to go through (I totally utterly hated my 2nd ivf cycle and was a wreck for most of it) and also the sedatives will be making you feel weak and emotional still. Hope the pain eases (if not, take coedine) and enjoy your v much deserved bap. X

You've done really well euro. This is a traumatic thing to go through, and I think anyone who says they take it in their stride are fibbing. It's a big deal. Take it easy x

I love you all. (And that's not the drugs talking.)

Sorry about all that euro. Handholds and cake. And wine. A little bit of enjoyment is necessary!

Waves at the differs, hurrah for the heart beat sweet.

at the assorted misbehaving fur-babies.

Too knackered to chat, the drucks now make me: headachy, grumpy, miserable, hot and really hungry. And tired. Only bloody four DRing stabs in. So unimpressed...

euro I saw all the nonsense regarding the test results over the last couple of days, how maddening, sorry I didn't get here quick enough to wish you luck for the EC. Sorry it was a nightmare, it's over and you did well.

I hate to see so many struggling in the tent, 'tis a shit process no doubt. Sending love, hopes and best wishes to all. x

Euro - 4 eggs is fab. Sorry things didn't go smoothly and you are feeling off. However the fact that you are doing ivf despite the known upset it brings for you is exactly what does make you a tough cookie. Take it easy and enjoy some more treats.

For all those in the tent.......I am really sorry. Wish I could take the pain and fear away. It is all just sometimes so so crap and so so unfair and just really exhausting. Being patted on the head and being told "there there dear" is not helpful. Your distress deserves acknowledgement because it is such a tough thing. You cant choose to suddenly feel better, I remember that so well. But it will pass, this isn't the end. Women have babies against the odds all the time. And none of you lot are against the odds. Everyone here makes embryos. The issue is simply a numbers game. Although that is unfair in itself. There is no predicting when camping in the tent of doom will hit. But it will pass I promise. Sending crusty bread with prawn and avocado and some crunchies. Is it time for a meet up???

euro I hope your pains have eased off now. The whole process sounded ridiculously stressy with tests being chased up etc, surely they could have prevented this given this is not your first time with them. Please don't think you aren't coping with this well. It is a stupidly difficult thing of great significance and I agree with sar that the very fact you have done it means you have been very strong. Sorry the waking up was so rubbish. I think you and me have quite similar reactions to anaesthetic type drugs - out of interest do you sleepwalk, night terrors or talk a lot asleep? I do and have wondered if there is a connection. On no scientific basis! I hope you hear good things about your egglets, hold on in there.

I am flopped on the sofa after a big weekend away. I am sorry to hear of so many people in the tent. The good thing about here is that we are never all in the tent at the same time so I pop in from the outside to lure you out and say that everything will be OK. I think I must be in the eye of the storm as I don't feel bad at all at the moment. I have been to the most fertile wedding of the century with a lot of bumps, babies and even someone going into labour! But I drank some prosecco, got dressed up and didn't really flinch. If only I could always feel like that. I was speaking to a good friend about things and she is also going through a very hard time in a different way. She said she had found solace and support online and we talked about how important that had been for both of us. So thank you everyone.

Sorry no name checking, I am done in - I can't do early hours stay ups any more!

rabbit I talk and laugh in my sleep sometimes, but not the other stuff.

I'm glad you're on the up (some of us need to be!) and had a good wedding despite the fecundity!

The clinic didn't call to tell us about the sperm sample and whether the eggs were mature. I couldn't even be bothered to chase. I just feel detached from the process now.

Still, at least I am back to my usual chilled-but-grumpy self! Now I just need the abdominal pains to fuck off and I'll be back to normal!

euro I'm sure you'll feel a lot better after a good nights sleep to get all the drugs out of your system. Remember to drink plenty to help flush them out. Your insides will feel a bit battered especially if they were poking around to try and find one ovary. I reacted ok to the drugs but I was much calmer with the lap because they gave me a sedative beforehand. With ec I felt quite panicky when I was on the chair and when I could hear all the beeping. When the drug was injected I felt like I was choking, it was only a second though and then I was asleep. When I came round though I felt so groggy and was panicking that I was never going to fully come round. It's funny how our minds have all these thoughts when we're not fully conscious. DH said I was so funny talking to the nurses and I kept thanking them and telling them I was so grateful and they were so kind. It's scary that I have no memory of this whatsoever and I'm a bit worried about what I might say to them next time, probably something totally inappropriate.

sar thank you for understanding. It's good to know that you still understand even though you're on the other side now. Your words are always so comforting.

rabbit well done on getting through the fertile wedding. Was the bride upduffed? I had an awful time at the BBQ on Friday, announcement that made my guts wrench, then sat with pregnant woman who talked non stip about it. Even DH complained about her to me afterwards which is very unlike him. She really annoyed me by saying that she hadn't planned it so well this time because she is going to be heavily pregnant over summer. Her ds is only 16 months, how is it all of these people can do it so easily?

Evening all,

Well done euro on getting through what sounds like a pretty stressful couple of days. I had a bit of a at you setting off the alarms before the procedure. I did the same for the opposite reason. When I was coming round my heart rate kept going so low that the alarms sounded and people came running. Eventually they said that it was just me and it was nothing to worry about. MrM was sceptical.... Have a good sleep and you will feel so much better in the morning. We are all proud of you xx

sar thanks as always for the wise words. You sound like you might be feeling a bit better?? I certainly hope so.

rabbit I find that big events like that can go either way and I just can't predict which one is going to make me feel miserable and which ones I will take in my stride. I'm glad that this was a good one for you.

mrsd that bbq sounds rubbish. My neighbour has announced a pregnancy and I am dreading a summer of watching her bump get bigger. I don't think that she'll be the type to talk about it a lot though so maybe it won't be too bad.

lemon thanks for making me feel better about being fecking miserable on the downregging drugs. Sorry that you're finding it so rubbish. It feels like forever when you're in the middle of it but it will pass soon. And as everyone says - it will all be worth it if you get a good result.

MrM and I have discovered The Wire many years behind the rest of the world. We found a bargain basement box set of all 5 series so have had a bit of a blitz this weekend. I love losing myself in police and murder mysteries. It's good escapism. Is it rabbit who shares my love of rugby? Had a good day yesterday eating a veggie fry up in the pub watching the Lions beat Australia . The mood swings are awful but we are having good times too.

Big waves to all that I've missed.