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Original poster

Excellent (or should that be eggcellent?) egg buddies! Anyone having IVF/ICSI in April/May/June 2013 come and join us!

999 replies

EuroShaggleton · 31/03/2013 15:35

We've almost filled the second thread so here is a new one, so we can carry on chatting! Threads #1 and #2 saw some stunning successes and some sad outcomes. We'll have more of the former and less of the latter on thread #3 please!

All comers welcome. I found it very useful to be with people going through the same thing when I did my first cycle, so if you would like to join us, please come on in!

OP posts:
twinklestar2 · 22/05/2013 12:30

Thx life :)

wishuponapositive · 22/05/2013 12:33

Chocoloco I'm at the Winterbourne in Dorchester. Are you there too or in London?

Sorry about your failed cycles but you will get there :) just like I will! (Eventually)

buzzybee123 · 22/05/2013 12:46

tame are you going to test, I had af like rumblings Blush and thought it was all over, and your treatment is nothing like fionas, hang on in there

on phone so can't see who asked about going abroad, I chose czech republic based on the fact that I had been ill there once before and had amazing health care, also I hate athens and the greek people, it is seriously the worse place I have travelled to. in saying that Serum do have a good reputation, my only objection is that I feel they make promises I don't know how they keep Hmm from chatting to some woman who have been there I felt they kind of pushed alot of things onto them, obviously when you are desperate to have a baby and are paying alot of money you are going to say yes to everything as you want to try everything possible to make it work, I just felt some of them were being taken advantage of, it happens here, I find it odd that ARGC do daily blood tests Hmm

I suppose its about finding the place you feel most comfortable using

I had the slightest tinge of pink stuff when I wiped so stuck a finger up there Hmm I was late taking my arse bullet, so I used up my last 3 tests today Blush Hmm

JuicyPear · 22/05/2013 12:57

Hi all, it's me, Jewcy, with a slight name change thanks to getting fed up of people asking about Judaism and Hannukah Hmm

Buzzy, I echo everything you have said about Serum but am loathe to put a dampener on anyone's choices like that bloody Fiona did with me. Look, Tame, like Buzzy says, you can only do your research and - more importantly IMO - talk to the women who have already been there on FF and join in the chit-chat of those who are currently cycling to see what kind of things they are being 'promised' and the quality of service they're getting.

The problem I find is that we are all of us desperate to have a baby and at this stage I really do believe we will take anything at face value if it promises to bring us closer to our dream.

My beautiful dresses turned up and they are fucking tiny. Bastard women-hating gay designers Angry

buzzybee123 · 22/05/2013 14:35

juicypear like the new name, I have thought about changing mine, sorry about the pigmy clothes you should have time to change them hopefully

twinklestar2 · 22/05/2013 15:19

It's good and bad news girls. They've said we should go for IVF. OH's SA was better but not significantly. That's the bad news. The good news is we can start in 6 weeks time. They've said if it doesn't work first time they'll give us a second go for free. We're only allowed one go really on NHS so that's nice of them.

Feel confused. I want a baby but I wanted it naturally. I need to reach a level of acceptance, that this IS happening to me. I don't think I'm quite there yet. I feel scared too and I feel like a failure. OH is really disappointed as he tried so hard.

I feel ashamed too. I'm really sorry if I shouldn't feel like that but I do. I didn't want this to happen to me.

Original poster
EuroShaggleton · 22/05/2013 15:22

Oh twink I recognise that feeling. I so wanted to manage it naturally. TBH, I've only really come to terms with needing IVF after having it and seeing it work. I've really struggled with the emotional side of it and feeling like a failure.

All I can say is, don't do it until you feel ready. We ended up putting it off for about 9 months and it feels like the right decision for us (although if we don't ever manage it, I might regret those lost 9 months).

OP posts:
JuicyPear · 22/05/2013 15:36

Twinks, please don't put it off. The grief of not doing this 'naturally' will soon dissipate when you're on with the IVF. You've been told in black & white what you need to do and I say go for it. Think about the chances of success with IVF compared to doing this alone. Honestly, who cares how you get that baby? Will you honestly give a shit when you see those two pink lines? You need this...do it and don't put it off because of some misguided notion that IVF is some massive blow to your pride and your dreams.

We will be here to hold your hand. There is nothing to be scared of x

resipsa · 22/05/2013 16:54

Winkle I replied in other thread but truly it's not the fake process you're dreading AND you get a picture of the embies at hours old (rather than 8 weeks plus). It's hard but will be worth it and like the others have said, it'll be meaningless when you see that +ve test.

buzzybee123 · 22/05/2013 17:51

twinks I look at it as a little bit of outsourcing to get the end goal, It takes time to get your head around the whole thing, but its the baby you want that is what you have to focus on :) when you hold your baby you won't care how you got there, I do agree with euro though you have to make peace with the process as best you can before you start

ok this is now me me me, I need a bit of hand holding right now, as you know I have immune issues and take medication for it, I have a specialist who I see, now I should have seen him before I went away but I let it too late and then he was away, I didn't think it was the end of the world plus it would save me money....

So I go today, his nurse Louise was lovely and so nice when I told her why I was there and that we had done DEIVF she was lovely,

So I go in to see Shehata I then explain to him that since I saw him in Aug 2012, I went to Create had a Fertility MOT and decided that the best option was DEIVF and now I was pregnant, well the first thing he said was why did you go to Create then he asked why I chose DE over my own and that your AMH means nothing and that he has a patient who has a lower AMH than me who is now 8 weeks pregnant!! I am like Shock Angry then he went on, when did I start taking the meds, so I told him, he said that was correct and that I should have spoken to him before as he has a protocol for immunes and IVF and that I should have had blood thinners. At this stage he very begrudgingly said congrats, grilled me some more and then assumed that I would have all my scans with him, I reminded him that I am under his NHS recurrent miscarriage clinic. So he gave me the meds I needed instead of a prescription so paid twice as much Hmm I am booked in for intralipids on Friday so can't see my GP until next Wednesday. I feel so awfu and guilty that while he ranted abou not using my own eggs I did actually think 'have I made a big mistake using DE' I have never questioned it until now Sad

I'm going to write him a letter.....................

waves to everyone else

resipsa · 22/05/2013 17:59

buzzy when I'm not on MN, I get paid to defend docs reported to the GMC. That behaviour was not acceptable. Please, please try to ignore what happened. Healthcare is a partnership, not a dictatorship. Don't let him take the gloss off a fantastic outcome.

resipsa · 22/05/2013 18:03

And he's right about AMH but not the way he thinks. At 42 mine is 21, slap bang in the middle of satisfactory but there ain't no nubby on my horizon...

resipsa · 22/05/2013 18:05

Umm, for nubby read bubby. I've moved thru "sad" stage following my BFN and am now on "bitter". Can you tell?

twinklestar2 · 22/05/2013 18:10

Thx everyone, feeling a lot better but finding it hard because OH says he doesn't want to tell anyone and I feel bad lying to my close friends.

He just said how annoyed he is cause of all the money we spent on organic food and it didn't make a bloody difference lol

JuicyPear · 22/05/2013 18:16

Buzzy! No, no, NO! Do not be made to feel inadequate and stupid by this Shitata knob. He has God delusions and wanted some glory from your pregnancy for himself and his ilk. Resipsa says it so much better than me but, come on girl, you are pregnant and Reprofit (and yours and Barry's bravery and determination) got you your miracle. Fucking very angry on your behalf - how DARE he negate your choices?! Angry

JuicyPear · 22/05/2013 18:20

Twink, I'm sorry, but I can't help thinking your hubby needs to turn his thinking on its head. No point bemoaning the stuff you have tried (and diet is massively important and still will be throughout your IVF cycle) which hasn't 'worked' when your problems are now deeper than just improving his sperm. Keep looking forwards not backwards. Subfertility is always a process of elimination but there is really no point in resenting the stuff we've tried so far.

JuicyPear · 22/05/2013 18:21

P.s...not telling your nearest and dearest about your IVF is fine. Hiding it through some notion of it being shameful is not x

buzzybee123 · 22/05/2013 18:59

thank you ladies, I also have had a bit of pink spotting when I wiped after staining on the loo :( I'm now fretting about every ache and pain I have.

I am now drinking sparkling grape juice out of a wine glass

resipsa · 22/05/2013 19:09

buzzy you've heard it before cause it's true. Some blood is common in the early stages. Are you sure it was from the front, not the back (if straining)?

buzzybee123 · 22/05/2013 19:16

no from the front, I'm now all crampy :(

resipsa · 22/05/2013 19:22

Oh...don't panic, sweetheart. Stay calm and it will pass. Keep us posted.

twinklestar2 · 22/05/2013 19:34

juicy - he did say it tongue in cheek really!

buzzy - docs sounds like a wanker - sorry!

twinklestar2 · 22/05/2013 19:34

buzzy, I hope the cramping passes. big hugs.

MotorcycleMama · 22/05/2013 19:53

buzzy how unprofessional and mean this man was to you! You do not need this at this point. Unfortunately it probably just shows his true motivation, which is to have your money and take all credit for your success. Don't feel guilty about the emotions you felt at the time - seems like a projection, in that he managed to make you feel how he wanted you to feel - ashamed and inadequate.You've achieved your aim in getting pregnant, and it makes perfect sense for you to seek help for the immune issues, but reject any 'help' from anybody who makes you feel like this. Do you have an alternative for help in this area? Hope you feel better soon.
Do what you need to do to reduce your stress levels, and try, try not to panic about spotting - it is quite normal.

NookNook · 22/05/2013 20:58

Buzzy what a cockhead! I dispair at the medical profession sometimes. I think they forget that there's a human being on the recieving end of their blathering. You did what was right for YOU and now you are pregnant. It's beautiful and amazing. The end.