Right, that's it! Fabulous Forty Somethings ttc want our bfp's and we want them now! We have waited long enough!

[hopefulgum]

Here's our shiney new thread. The one where I finally get upduffed with everyone else!

[CaliBee]

Thankyou diege and lizard for your kind and supportive words.
Yes its NIreland for sure. I'm trying to weigh up the pros and cons. For now the cons outweigh the pros by a mile but this would change as I would have to move house here anyway(the rent on this one is way too high and its freezing cold to boot) and if I move to a cheaper part of town, I know DS would go to his Dads anyway. So I would be home alone.
It is possible that I would ovulate later in the cycle but that would be just how it was without clomid so all the side-effects for nothing. I need to do something very very out of character for me and just wait and watch...on both counts lol. I do use preseed when things get dry...its never been a problem until I used the clomid.
Good luck with the scan diege...anxious times.
Oh lizard I had a giggle at the old pre-seed and "going down"...I know exactly what you mean though. Df does however know about my poas and preseed use ...haha. infact he is quite often a witness to me peeing in a cup and has actually been the administrator of the old preseed before now...bless him. Share and share alike I say. I have heard that saliva is not good for sperm too....df gets a short sharp "oi" if he tries that one.
Waves to everybody else...I am catching up slowly.

[isadorable]

green gum fingers crossed that this is both your time(s).

cali I'm sure life will find a way of working itself out for you for the best. Your mum is probably worried about you - we never stop being their babies - but this is your time and your choices. Hope you get a handle on what's going on with your cycle too.

Good luck for Tuesday diege. I am indeed an expat, my dp is French and for the moment my dd's first words are mostly French though I speak English to her. She loves Charlie and Lola and in the night garden in English though.

Thanks for all the support re my hip. It is really sore and needs encouraging back in alignment. I am going to see about osteopathy next week. I've got lots of strong drugs to take and it seems a bit better for me making time to rest.

I spoke to my mum about not having had a period. She was concerned I might be pregnant and I thought she'd be negative when I said I'm not but I'd like to be. She was not that surprised and more supportive than I expected. I said I'd like dd to have a sibling but there's not much time. And I need to get AF back on track first! When I had my daughter, I remember the lovely childcare nurse saying too me - hope to see you here again for her brother! I was amused he thought I'd be thinking like that so soon and also that he didn't see any problem with my age. I see more and more older mums here. It really helps me be optimistic for us all. Hope you're all having nice weekends?

[CaliBee]

Thankyou isadorable.
Your hip sounds awful...i hope you feel better very soon. I'm glad your mum was supportive. My mum ,bless her, is as conventional as they come. She hates change with a passion so she has alwsys had het hands full with me as i love spontsneity. Ttc and moving away are not things i can do quickly however, but they still dont "fit" with her old fashioned view of what should and shouldn't be unfortunately.

[hopefulgum]

Good morning.

Calibee, can I send a big Aussie bear hug (that would be a Koala I suppose) your way? My mum is a bit like yours and I do feel your pain. How hard could it be to just be positive for their daughters? And happy they are happy??
I also sympathise about your DD's pregnancy. It is wonderful news, but so bittersweet when you have been trying so hard to have a baby too. I hope you will be able to talk to someone about the clomid. I have very mixed feelings about it, but it worked for you before, so it should do again.

As for going to NI, I think if I were in your shoes I'd go. Being apart from your (soon to be) DH would be so hard. And if you are ttc, you really need to be with him. The great thing is that NI isn't that far away from your family is it?

Have you made any plans for the wedding?

Greenlizard, I am afraid there's been no more SWI. As far as I'm concerned, peak day was it. I couldn't take my temperature yesterday morning, because I thought it more important to try SWI with DH, by then it was too late to take my temp. Unfortunately DH wasn't able to "give me the goods" so to speak, but maybe there was a stray few in there. But today's temperature indicates a temp rise, so I reckon that was my one and only chance on Peak night. I hope it was enough, but I am trying to remain realistic. I have gotten pregnant (9 times in total) before, so I suppose there's a good chance I could again. However I do sometimes think it is too late and I may never have that pleasure again. Whatever happens, I know I've been blessed to have the five I have, and if I just keep having unprotected sex, there's always a chance, no matter how tiny.

Deige, I am looking forward to hearing about your scan.

Isadorable - I envy you living in Toulouse. Does sound rather glamorous. Do you work there? Did I already ask you? I've lost track of what everyone does. It is nice to hear that it isn't unusual in France to see older mums. I keep buoyant knowing that for hundreds of years women kept having babies until their bodies stopped, and as I am still ovulating, there's always hope.

I've got a busy day today - must do some tidying and cleaning before hosting knitting club at my house. Sounds very "old lady" doesn't it, but it isn't. I've got the wine ready, made tiramisu and a lemon passionfruit cake. Now I just have to clean up and get all the toys off the couch, floor and table. DH will take DS out, so I'll have a peaceful afternoon clucking with the other knitters, quaffing a nice Riesling and gorging on cake. YUM!!

Have good day/night!

[CaliBee]

gum that hug is very greatfully received. Mum's eh? I dont think my mum even realises what she does tbh. I had a long chat with my sister (who is very wise and has been on the receiving end of mum's emotional ttricks many times) and i did feel much better. I even took a peak online at the Nireland barracks and flight prices and durations. Its only an hour to Birmingham which is also an hour away. I feel positive one minute then waver the next. Life eh?
I do hope your timing was on par. Fingers crossed for you. I do feel you have another bfp in the post [:)] . I have to say i'm wondering if after this cycle not going to plan on clomid, i may just stop everything and just enjoy sex again with no contraception . I love sex but seem to be falling into the old trap of only really getting into it when the timing is good.
I bumped into an old friend yesterday who had her little girl at 42..she tried for 9 months but had no tests or assistance, just relaxed and believed it could/would happen. Its just so scary....time seems to flying by and yet there is so little of it.

[hopefulgum]

Calibee,If only we didn't have to worry about the "time factor" and could just relax,have lots of lovely unplanned, untimed sex and find ourselves blissfully up-the-duff.That's a pretty tricky thing to do when you are over 40 and desperately want a baby. It is great that your friend as so relaxed and fell pregnant and has a lovely daughter. I think,if,like us,you have miscarried, the desperation is even worse.

Well, I am experiencing some awful low abdo pain. It feels like extended ovulation pain. Which is nothing new. I have had this on occasion before and always wondered what it was, I now realise that it is after ovulation. I think there must be a lot of inflammation in there. It hurts to wee etc and is just uncomfortable. I am hoping it is a sign of a super egg, but I have read that this can happen in our 40s due to more estrogen (perimenopause). I can't take anti-inflammatories as they suppress ovulation and can cause implantation problems. So,paracetemol it is. And a hot water bottle too I think. I am glad I am not working today.

On a brighter note, I had a lovely temperature rise today,which always makes me happy. Let's hope it's still up in 13 days,then I'll celebrate

[Irishmammybread]

Happy St Patrick's Day everyone!
I'm once again trying to catch up with the thread! Since I got back from the funeral in Ireland I've had a respiratory infection,cough/sore throat/fever that's just about going now and with work etc to contend with too I've not had much time or energy for Mumsnet though I've tried to skim over the last few pages.

Calendergal I'm so sorry to hear your news,glad it hasn't been physically too bad but I know the emotional side is whole different story,look after yourself x

JBrd ,congratulations! Has the news sunk in yet? You must be delighted!

Isabeller how are you feeling? You are going through such a difficult time.

Isadorable ,what a great opportunity for your DD to be bilingual! We've visited Toulouse, it's a lovely place. Your hip sounds painful,hope it settles down soon.

gum I'd like to join your knitting club,not that I can knit, but it sounds a lovely way to spend an afternoon with friends chatting and drinking wine and eating cake,mmmmm!

CaliBee ,congrats on your official engagement! Life is such a rollercoaster though, it must have been a shock to hear your DD is pregnant, when is she due? I can see you must feel torn between moving with DP or staying in the UK with your kids/grandkids, but N Ireland isn't really that far away for them to come and see you or you to get back over. How long would the posting be for?
I also empathise with your thinking about stepping back from obsessively ttc and just enjoying sex. My 12 months using my Duofertility monitor finishes in May. That £500 seemed a small price to pay at the time when it guaranteed a full refund if I wasn't pregnant in 12 mths. Now of course after a few miscarriages the guarantee is invalid and I still have no baby.I don't know if I can justify any further payments really so I'm thinking of going "off piste" so to speak and forgetting temping,trying to take a more relaxed approach. I still don't want to stop trying and at least having tracked my cycles for a while I can spot the symptoms of impending ovulation better.

It was my due date for the last baby I lost today,we were going to call him Patrick if he was a boy though all my babies are late so it probably would have been next week rather than on St Pat's Day. I don't know if things will get easier now all my due dates are past,it still feels so raw .I deliberately tried not to remember the dates of the miscarriages but they're stuck in my mind too, it's just coming up to a year since my first miscarriage. I was talking to a friend last week, one of the very few people who realizes I'm still affected by the losses, but she had two mc, one late, before she had her DC so she understands.
The anniversary for the last baby she lost is coming up soon, 10 years later the grief is still there though she finds it a lot easier to deal with now.

It doesn't help that AF arrived yesterday after a few days of soaring temps, which I knew really were due to the fact I was ILL but I still couldn't help getting my hopes raised!
Sorry for the rant.Life just isn't fair sometimes!
Ah well, brand new cycle, everything to aim for, here we go again!

Hello Morien Green notsoold DrWho Sparkly and everyone else!
Good luck with your scan this week Diege.

[Irishmammybread]

Posts crossed gum . Hope your abdo pain settles with the paracetemol, take it easy. Yay for your temp rise,looks like you had things well timed!

[Isabeller]

Thank you so much for the good wishes, I'm finding it hard to concentrate properly and doing a lot of displacement activity to keep worry at bay. I am following thread and thinking of you all, sending and a to cuddle when necessary xx Is

[CaliBee]

gum I hope the pain eases very soon. It sounds like corpus luteum pain to me. Your body is bviously working hard to provide the necessary amount of progesterone needed to sustain a wee Gum.

irish thankyou. To be honest it wasn't really a shock to hear about DD and her pregnancy. Following a messy split with her partner yesterday she soon met and moved in with a lovely fella.....i could almost read her mind. I admit I would have preferred her to wait a little longer, but at the end of the day she is an adult and she seems very happy. I'm not sure of her due date, she hasn't seen a gp yet as she moved out of her gp's catchment area a few weeks ago and has to register with a new one. I think she is about 7weeks..ish.
£500????!!!!!!! Wow...thats a huge amount. What service do you get for that of you don't mind me asking??

isabeller times are tough for you just now....keep strong sweety.

So its cd22 for me today. Still no ovulation. I do have niggling pains on and off down there but they have been there on and off for a couple of weeks now. I am considering getting to cd25 and using the provera and starting a fresh cycle. I just wish the clinic would scan me to see if anything is happening.

I spoke to dd2 and ds last night about the dilemma. Ds seemed very cool about it all...infact he expressed how good it would be to come and visit me in NIreland. Dd2 was a different story though. At 19 she is hugely self conscious and a big worrier. She scrapped her plans for uni after college (due to cost) and is planning to do nursing either later this year or next year, in the meantime she works 12 hour split shifts in two dead-end jobs, with perhaps one day off every three weeks. She refuses to go to her Dads (infact she called him a self absorbed prick lol) and has flown into a panic about what will happen. I have of course told her to come with me, but I know sensibly that this will probably not happen. So I still have a long way to go before any decisions are made. Dp has had instructions to go to The Hive centre (army welfare) to find out as much info as possible re housing etc. For all we know there may be rules dictating how long you have to be married before you can get a house for instance....
So much going on in my little head. But actually feeling quite excited on the quiet!!!

[CaliBee]

Tuts....DS1 split with her partner last summer...NOT yesterday.

[JBrd]

Good morning, everyone!

Irish Hope you are feeling better, sounds as if you've been really rough recently. Can't help when you have to deal with a funeral, travel and work, too.
I can only imagine what it must feel like to come to your EDD after having had a miscarriage...so sad. Hope that you can find some time for yourself to deal with all the emotions.

hopeful Are you OK? Your abdominal pains sound quite alarming to me! And I don't want to rain on your parade, but if it hurts when you pee, shouldn't you see a doctor? As a long-time cystitis sufferer, this sounds very much like a bladder infection to me!

isadorable Is your hip any better? Sounds very uncomfortable... What's the health system like in France?

Cali So sorry to hear that you had such a rough time with family after your holiday! As if you didn't have enough to deal with already... I think I'd agree with what others have said and say go to NIreland - life's too short, you love your soon-to-be-DH and it will be an adventure! But of course, it's never as easy as that... Do you think your DD2 might come round to the idea of either coming with you or doing her own thing?
And your mum....phew. Certainly not holding back, is she?! Hope she comes round soon and starts being a bit more supportive.

I'm off to the GP now to try and get the referral for the consultant haematologist. Thought I'd get the ball rolling asap, considering how long it took them last time.
We had a lovely weekend visiting friends. I'm still a bit , certainly in no way as ecstatic as last time, how awful is that?!? But I really need to take it one day at a time...
Doesn't help that I have a job interview on Friday! It would be fab if it worked out, but what on earth do I tell them about being pg?!? Need to go and find out what my (and any potential new employer's) position is with this...

Sorry for not doing more name-checking, need to dash!

[hopefulgum]

Hi everyone.Thanks for your concern re: the abdo pain. I really doubt it is a bladder infection or cystisis because the weeing doesn't burn at all. And I haven't had a UTI forever. Also bowel movements hurt (does that happen with cystitis? It is much better this evening than it was yesterday, and when I've had it before,it is usually over in three days. If it goes on for too long I'll see the doctor, but I really have had it before and it always resolves.

I hope it is a corpus lutuem prepping for a pregnancy.That would be lovely

Err, DH hovering near the computer, will have to make a hasty exit..
Til later...xxx

[DoctorWhoFan]

Hi ladies...been in absentia due to much swi...I'm like a bloke - can't concentrate on more than one thing at a time!

Sooooo many congratulations JBrd on your bfp...how exciting for you! Xx

Brain isn't working too well this morning, so will keep it brief. Love to all.

[Morien]

Hello there, hope everyone's week has got off to a good start.

I don't have much time so sorry in advance for not reacting to everyone - I've read all your posts, though!

jbrd I think you should wait until they offer you the job (that's a when, not an if ) Will keep my fingers crossed for you on Friday. Hope the haematologist referral comes through soon.

cali good luck for your decision about N Ireland. It's a tough one. Whilst it's hard to drop everything and go abroad (especially when it's to accompany someone), I was thinking that maybe N Ireland could be a kind of test for you, a trial run to see if you like life as an army wife, living in the barracks and all it entails (I've no idea what!) - if you do, then great, but if you don't find it it easy, then as you say home's only a short flight away, which wouldn't be the case for Afghanistan or wherever.

diege, notsoold, sparkly how are you?

And you, calendargal and remnant?

And a big hello to the rest of you too.

I've made an appointment to see someone in the Medically Assisted unit on Thursday morning so we'll take it from there. It's the same hospital that I saw the gynae at last week so the doctor I see will have access to the blood test results I wasn't given (and I'll make sure to ask for a copy this time!)

[isadorable]

Just a quickie for isabeller hope you're doing ok? Been thinking about you. ((()))

Hi to everyone else!

[Morien]

Well, AF is here at last (nearly 10 weeks!) so I'm back in the game on CD1

[JBrd]

Woohoo, Morien!!

[CaliBee]

Good luck morien....it seems odd to celebrate af arriving, but having been where you are more than once I know what it feels like.
drwhofan ...dutty gal... ...enjoy
morien yes your right, like a test. However, if he did a six month tour of Afghan, I would be left behind anyway. Wives never go on tours.

Love to all x

[greenlizard]

Morning all

Excellent news morien and welcome back to the game! ! Glad to see that AF turns up the minute you make an appointment! Do you have a plan for TTC'ng or are you taking an au naturel approach?

drwhofan I am impressed that you are so busy DTD you can't come on MN! This is a singularly focussed approach which should most certainly be rewarded with a BFP as soon as possible...

Good luck with the scan diege and isabeller hope you are ok?

Today is CD15 and FF seems to think that I ovulated on CD12 and gave me cross hairs but I am not so sure because I have had twinges on my right side for a few days which still feels like O pain and my temp rises on CD13/14 were quite low (got quite a nice jump this morning though) so we will see how we get on. We did a lot of DTD so got the sex rating as high on FF. Why do I always feel like I have failed an exam question on that? It covers the days -3,-2-1,0,+1 and so far I haven't managed to cover the all of them (what do you get, I wonder if you do - a gold star?

I have been taking Q10 Co and DHEA this along with EPO (which did nothing to my CM that I could see but I was only taking a normal dose). I have stopped the EPO as its not recommended after ovulation but does anyone know about Q10 and DEHA? Now I am in the 2WW I am once again going to attempt to be serenity personified but I am off to Bermuda on Friday so that will most certainly distract me from thinking too much about it. Am very excited.

Hope you all have fabulous days!

[hopefulgum]

Hi. Greenlizard it is fine to keep taking the DHEA and the Coq10, but it is a good idea to stop the EPO. I also take aspirin,B complex in the tww and I am looking into Bromelain which is an enzyme which can help implantation (it is from the hard core of the pineapple, but I don't think eating pineapple will do the same thing, however I have craved pineapple today and plan to eat some soon).

Boy do I feel ordinary today...The tummy pain has lessened substantially,thank goodness, but I've felt nauseous on and off all day and really,really tired. I haven't for one second thought of those symptoms as symptoms of pregnancy (I promise ) because it is way too early,and I know there is a viral thing spreading its love around the school where I work.

I really should go find the couch, my knitting and an episode of the Walking Dead. I know, I feel like a TV slut when I watch it, as it really is a bit shit, but it is mindless shit and that's just what I need

green I have completely failed at the FF rating of swi. I almost always only get "good". I would love to do better, but it just doesn't seem to work out that way. My DH is no longer a young man,and alas, I'm not too nubile myself! As for the gold star..I think that's the positive pregnancy test.

Finger's crossed we both get a gold star this cycle

[hopefulgum]

P.S. How long will you be in Bermuda ,Green ? You lucky,lucky girl! Enjoy!

[hopefulgum]

Argh...I can't believe I put an apostrophe in "fingers"...OMG. I am a Fu#*ing English teacher.

Bloody hell Mumsnet, why can't we have an "edit" button???

[Diege]

Hello all . Back from scan and all well Bean measuring for dates (measures 8 + 4), I'm 8 + 3 on calendar dates but not on ovulation ones...Anyway, good strong and regular heartbeat and they're booking me for the 12 week one, so a massive relief!
green I am very about Bemuda...what a wonderful break you'll have - will it be hot?
Gum Walking Dead is my absolute favourite programme; can't wait for the new series when I can get it from LoveFilm. I am hearing good things from spoiler threads of this new series.
Better go as in the office and people are passing very close by...

[CaliBee]

Oh boy....gum you must have head turns about some of my grammar then!! I swear I got a fantastic result in my o'levels!! Its the texting that has ruined it. Glad to hear your tummy pain has eased but I do hope you haven't got "the bug". We have had a terrible sickness bug doing the rounds over here this winter...as a few ladies on here have found out. Fortunately I managed to avoid it. Oh and by the way, I only got a "good" on the month I got my BFP.

Oh lizard completey [envy} of your trip. You will have a fantastic time I'm sure.

I had enough earlier today and called the clinic again. I basically told them I was going to start the provera now. They suggested waiting until at least cd30, then doing a hpt and if/when its bfn to start the provera then. Dare I say though that the ovary pain has increased a little and the blue line on the opk was slightly darker this afternoon.....
I rang the registrars office earlier....eeeek. We have to both present for an appointment to register our intent to marry. That could be difficult given Dp's lack of time off.