Right, that's it! Fabulous Forty Somethings ttc want our bfp's and we want them now! We have waited long enough!

[hopefulgum]

Here's our shiney new thread. The one where I finally get upduffed with everyone else!

Hi green I wish you all the hugs and gentleness in the world. I went through a EPRC last July at 13.5 weeks. I also has a horrendous time but time does heal. It's just a case of day by day.i thin my period came back around 5 weeks later. I had bled before the op and required blood transfusion so bled very little after. It was a dreadful time but you do get back on track I promise x

green I'm sorry I can't answer your questions.. mine was a late TFMR..I just can say take all your time to grief and recover and don't think it was your last chance, no matter how tiny we all do have another chance!
Jbrd I can imagine what your friends are going through.. my baby had several brain anomalies, she most probably would have suffered from seizures, mental retardation and other behavioural/physical problems but I will never know to which extent.. and this makes me feel even guilter and regret what I did .. What was terrible was that doctors couldn't tell us much.. I hope that even if prospectives seem grim now, your friends' baby development won't be too badly affected.. Did they have any genetic testing?
Calibee How awful to have him sent to Canada! What british army as to do in Canada by the way??
Hopeful Have a wonderful holiday! I agree with the others, it's just the right time for a break!
Morien If you are 8wks that's really a great jump forward!! Don't worry too much with symptoms..every preganacy is a different one.. I read about a woman in the US who delivered a baby without knowing she was pregnant!!!!!...bless her..

So much going on here!! Congratulatons to Morien - that's just great, crossing my fingers for a dull and uneventful pregnancy.

Green, you have been in my thoughts. How heartbreaking for you. I know it must be very hard now so try to be kind to yourself and take things little by little till you feel stronger emotionally. I havent had an ERPC so no experiences to share.

Calibee - how crap is it that DH being sent away right now!

Gum - I'm so envious of your holiday and perhaps a break from ttc will help you too.

Diege - Laurie is lovely. My mum hated DD's name which is not too difficult to guess from my user name (!) She accepts it now but really made me doubt my taste just after she was born. Kept relaying others' negative reactions to it which was of course very helpful; not. Too unusual and too similar to Samantha's mother in B'witched apparently... She recently said to me - "you know, it sounds OK in French"!!!

AFM - nothing to report. BFN day 27 but now on day 32... Admittedly we havent really been trying hard enough... What was a regular 28 day cycle has been all over the place since feb. My mum and her mum both went through the menopause at 55 so I'm not too worried yet. I dont want to put too much pressure on things- I will have some quieter time over the summer and maybe I should go see my gynae for a chat though? They re very fond of testing everything here so perhaps I should take advantage?

Hello everyone! The thread is just pumping lately

Well, now that AF is here and I had a good long swim last night I am feeling a lot more human and happy. For some strange reason all the run around with the doctor prescribing the wrong stuff, telling me to take the provera, then to stop, it all just got to me somehow.

But one thing it has done for me is made me realise a couple of things;1)I don't need anything extra to conceive, my progesterone is ok and I should stop the second guessing; and 2)It is okay to feel sad about this when I have been doing it for so long and 3) It might not happen.

And I think I am ok with that. I would love for it to happen, but I am letting go of the "need" for now. So I think taking a more "throw caution into the wind" type of attitude will do me good.

I am still temping at the moment, but that's because I'd like to know what's going on in my cycle and when to expect AF while I am on holiday.But I will have ovulated before we leave, so I am not taking the thermometer with me.

Enough about me...

Morien, if you are 8 weeks, that's a great head start. They might do a scan to find out how far along you are. That would be exciting (I am sure all will be well).

Isabeller, I am sorry you are feeling so crap, but that's a great sign that things are progressing. When are you having a scan?

Love to all....

More great news here... Finding it hard to believe.. Got BFP! Used the SMEP fir the first time and it worked ...nearly killing us in the process!

Very nervous however as we all know on this thread that this is just the first hurdle. For me if things are going to go wrong ,it will be around the 6 week mark with some spotting. Lots of ladies have spotting and have healthy pregnancies but unfortunately for me it just means a mc.

Lots of love to everyone x

Congratulations Fizz that's great news! Fingers crossed for a calm spot free pregnancy!

Fizz!!! Congratulations!!! And like isadorable I am keeping everything crossed for you!!
Xx

littlepinkfizz CONGRATULATIONS! That is amazing news!

Now of course it is difficult not to worry but let's face it even when you try to be pragmatic out loud, inside you are in love from the very first line!!!. . There is no reason to think you won't have a great pregnancy and a lovely squiggly baby at the end. I really hope you do. Wishing you all the very best of luck.

Xxxx

Gum - I am normally here with a different name, but can't change it at the moment, but wanted to say with your progesterone results you need to know the units it is measured in. One measure used in USA is anything over 10 is needed, the other used in uk is anything over 30 us good.

With a result of 33, it confirms ovulation but one of the fertility consultants I saw was looking for over 60 to be considered a good level to support pregnancy. I never got this, but then again the progesterone never helped me anyway, prolonged time to miscarriage rather thdn preventing miscarriage.

I can fully empathise with your feelings changing over ttc. I have been there, and whilst I would love a little miracle, I had to start using contraception to stop driving myself crazy every month. It is hard coming to terms with giving up ttc.

littlepinkfizz congratulations!!!! What wonderful news. Here's to an uneventful pregnancy. I can relate to your fears about spotting - I'm terrified every time I go to the loo in case there's blood when I wipe, because of what it meant last time. I guess the fear will recede over time (assuming I get that far).

mozzarella I've said it before, like lots of others here, and I'll say it again: what an awful decision you had to make. My heart goes out to you.

Littlepinkfizz, congratulations and it will stick! It has to! It just has to, so all of us with a history of bad news around week 6 can be inspired by you! Stick, baby stick!

Fantastic news littlefizz....i'm thrilled for you. X

Wow littlepink, congratulations, that's excellent news. Like everyone else, I wish you a smooth trouble free pregnancy.

Morien, I had very few symptoms this time round, the only noticable thing was sore breasts, which I too kept prodding to check they were still sore. When I went to the EPU after a small bleed, I was amazed to see an actual baby! And probably my gag reflex was stronger, but I had no nausea and didn't feel especially tired. I won't say don't worry about lack of symptoms, because of course you will, I did, but hopefully everything'll be fine. Have you found out how far along you are yet?

Congratulations littlepink, that's really good news !

Congratulations Littlepinkfizz, that's fabulous news. So many bfp's. It is great news all round.

willitbe, I am in Australia and progesterone is measured like in the US. So anything over 10 is good. I am not at all worried about my progesterone levels. I am not worried about any levels,actually, whatever will be will be.

I had hoped I would be one of the ladies posting a bfp on this thread (the title says it all when I started the thread). I have been on so many of these threads and granted I have posted 3 bfp's over the time, I really wanted to have one this time. Never mind, the show must go on, and as long as I am open to conception, there is a chance. No amount of wailing and chest beating is going to make it happen.I won't be using contraception and hopefully won't continue to make myself crazy every month.

The extra exercise I've been doing has really lifted my mood, so I will be keeping that up. It makes for an extremely busy week, what with taxi-ing the kids to their various hobbies and past-times (netball training, netball games, choir, music lessons, socialising etc,etc). Plus working and fitting in the exercise. But it is making time fly and soon I'll be flying away for our tropical break.

My DH went to the funeral of one of our students yesterday. When I spoke to him afterwards I asked how it was and he said,"no father (or mother) should ever have to bury their child". He is so right. It is just so awful. Then he said, "let me pick up DS today, I want to take him for a walk." He is a truly lovely man. I know that if we were to have a "surprise" pregnancy he'll be a loving,wonderful dad all over again. I feel my life is full of blessings, and yes one more wouldn't hurt, but I can cope if that one doesn't eventually come.

green I've been thinking about you and wondering how you were getting on. Pregnancy loss is the most devastating experience to go through, I know felt at rock bottom especially when I miscarried the first baby,such sadness and despair.I struggled to cope with life for a while afterwards, I could function normally for the kids but felt panic when I went out and couldn't go back to work for a few weeks.(I didn't feel I could act professionally and make important decisions in my shaky frame of mind). I applaud you for going back to work,I think you're very brave and strong.
With regard to your questions,I didn't have an ERPC but 4 natural miscarriages ,bleeding lasted about 2 weeks for MC 1 and 3 and 6 days for my early miscarriages. I was only temping after MC 2 which was at 6 weeks and my temperature dropped as bleeding began,very much like the pattern with a normal period. I didn't do any HPTs after MC 1 but blood HCG had dropped 2 weeks after. My next AF came 35 days after both MC 1 and 3, I ovulated and conceived 14d after MC2.
I'm now 30d after my last MC and had a negative HPT 2 weeks after it started.Still no AF but I think it's imminent.

Diege thank you for your kind words. Because no one in RL knows about my last miscarriage(apart from the EPU midwife I spoke to on the phone and my GP) there's almost a sense of unreality about it ,but the horror hits me again every so often and I feel so sad. It's hard knowing I wont be trying again but I have to respect how DH feels too and think of the whole family. If it was just down to me I would want to keep going despite the chances being slim. I don't think he'll change his mind, he obviously wishes we hadn't lost the babies we did but doesn't feel that desperation to have another like I do to risk trying again. I do love him very much and I know we're lucky with our DC so I'm just trying to come to terms with things.
Having said that we haven't started using contraception yet though I've ditched temping,opks and strategic dtd. I suppose not trying isn't the same as deliberating avoiding so we'll have to think about it! It just goes against the grain when I still long for a baby.
willitbe how long did it take you to reconcile yourself to giving up ?
hopeful sounds like you're going through a difficult time with hard decisions too. I hope you can relax and enjoy your holiday.
JBrd your poor friends,they must be so worried about their little one.
CaliBee I can't believe your DH is being sent away so soon! Hope you've got a little honeymoon baby on board already though!
Phew sorry for the essay,though I think it's therapeutic sometimes writing things down!
Hi to everyone else

Littlepinkfizz it's fantastic news!fx for a sticky baby!
Morien thank you for your words!

So much for a symptom-free pregnancy! I've just been sick I wasn't at all sick last time and I'm all in favour of anything that makes this pg different from that one. Seeing the gynae this afternoon so will be back later to tell you how far along I am. I hope you don't mind me hanging around; maybe once I've had my scan today I'll feel ready to post on the ante-natal threads, but I don't think I'm ready to move on from here yet.

gum how sad that one of your students died. Your DH sounds lovely, though.

I saw the little heartbeat! The scan put me at about 5.6, which is pretty much what I expected (still, couldn't help hoping that I'd had a normal cycle and was indeed over 8 weeks - at 5,6 it feels like there's an awful long way to go to clear the first hurdle). I've been booked in for a scan (what in the UK would be the 12-week scan; I'll be 11 weeks as here it's more 'late in the first trimester scan'), and I see the gynae again the same day.

The gynae mentioned the Harmony test to me - not available in Belgium though he expects it to be within a year or so, but he says I could go to Germany or the Netherlands for it (or something similar). He said we can talk about it in 5 weeks, anyway.

Congratulations, pink! Here's to a really boring and un-eventful pregnancy

Morien lovely news, how exciting!

That is such reassuring news for you to hear the heart beat morien. I'm sure you are overjoyed.

Many thanks to everyone for their best wishes. Still can't quite believe it and will be nervous until I get past 6 weeks first x

Morien how wonderful to see the little heart beat and great that you're feeling sick too...for all the right reasons!
Do you think you will travel to have the Harmony test?
Hope the next few weeks fly by for you till your next scan!

Morien, 5w6d and a heartbeat is a very good result! I would certainly go for harmony, a little travel can not hurt and it might save you the amnio test later on!

Morien, that's fantastic news! Seeing a heartbeat at that stage is great. I think I'd be going for the Harmony test. So much better than Amnio.

I hope the next 5 weeks fly for you. I know how slow they can feel.

No news from me. It is the weekend, thank goodness. It has been so busy during the week, but it also seems to be a busy weekend ahead of us...phew. It will be good to vege out in the sun in a couple of weeks.

Wonderful news Morien!
I had a lovely day yesterday, we invited a friend of DD and his sister for a playdate+ dinner.. They played in the garden while DP cooked some delicious Chinese food.. DD was very excited but she finally fall asleep at 10.30pm.. Today we could go out for a pic-nic..
I don't know when to expect AF this cycle due to early ovulation.. somewhere around tomorrow and a few days after.. I already fell the usual ovarian pain, but still hope they won't show up so I'm afraid I'll be very upset when they'll do..