It is a fact universally acknowledged that a woman in her thirties in possession of a ticking biological clock MUST be in want of a baybee.

[ArielThePiraticalMermaid]

The former thread proved full of sadness and most vexatious disappointments, wherefore we know not :(. Therefore the BESH will be donning their empire dresses and enlisting the assistance of Captain Wentworth and his admirable breeches and Mr Darcy smouldering damply in his transparent white shirt both of whom with their pleasing countenances and sound judgements and enormous fortunes, in short both of whom are everything a young man ought to be in the expectation that happier times may be ahead for the BESH.

Hurrah! Glad to hear it, Dot :)

Dor that's brilliant.

I know nothing about cars driving fast and missed all the rugby excitement, cos I spent last night menkulling to pee on a arctic stick this morning at cd29 (and if you've been holding it up from 4am a dorito's pot is too small), which I know is not late by most people's standards, but it is if you're averaging 26/27-day cycles. And now we're bot depressed. And I have relived all my symptoms from the brief diffage last year. :(

Sorry driz, that's pants :(

Sorry Driz.

If anyone has nothing better to do, I'd appreciate some experienced eyes on my FF chart. I've posted two versions of it to my MN profile, I think, but I don't really know how this bit works, so if you can't see them, let me know.
There are 2, with explanations. Basically, I've either not OV'd at all, or I OV'd at the same time as all the first signs of fertility appeared, which means all BE's valiant sechsing efforts have been for nought, and also that I have no advance warning of approaching OV, which is just really fecking annoying, and makes no sense anyway. OV has to be after the LH surge, right? Not simultaneous?
So confused.

moll I don't chart so this is a very non-expert opinion, but using this sample chart as a guideline, I would guess that if your temp stays up tomorrow, you might have OV'd yesterday? You could have missed the LH surge if it happened during a very short window.

captain i think you have O'd, however you will not get crosshairs until FF has confirmed 3 temps above your coverline. IMO you O'd on CD18 and you will get crosshairs tomorrow in line with this assuming you get a high temp tomorrow. There is a possibility FF may struggle giving you crosshairs due to the disregarded (correctly it appears) temp on CD18, however if would assume that was O day if I were you.

Where is everyone? Are you all out having an actual life??

Thanks Twink and Merk - I'm really hoping I didn't O on CD18 though, as this means we missed the boat. A most vexatious situation and no mistake.

I'm having a lovely relaxy day with BE, went for a nice swim and thought, actually, I've just got a job I love, other things in my life are ticking along promisingly. I enjoy being able to do things like go swimming and generally doing whatever I like, so it's ok and I should just stop stressing and if it happens, it happens, and if it doesn't, more time for me to take over the world, basically.

Please feel free to repeat this para back at me as I menkul my tits off in the next two weeks.

How's everyone else's weekends? X

Is it really Sunday evening? really? Holy cow :( :( :(

Driz :( sorry to hear your menkulling. Would you like the cod of comfort? I can't remember who has it at the moment but I will go find it for you.

Captain - I will not comment on your charts, they mean nothing to me - I really haven't got a clue about temping. I kind of wish i'd got into it and I did buy a thermometer about a year ago but I just always forget to start taking my temp. Fingers crossed you DTED at exactly the right time :)

Twink - I have indeed had a life this weekend - makes a friggin change. My weekend has revolved around shopping and spending a serious amount of money on clothes and kettle bells and a rowing machine. And Nandos :)

Nork (that really may stick) what kind of job stress? Are you changing jobs and more importantly where are you going on holiday??!! Waiting for May might see a bit of an emotional pull but maybe best to be stress free?

I have no thoughts on Lewis Hamilton, other than he went down in my estimations when he started shafting Nicole 'I haven't got a fucking clue who I am or where I am dozy mare' Shirtswinger. I really don't understand F1. Or rugby to be honest but I don't mind perving at some of the fitter players. So generally last night was a bit slow for MATV and I because we were constantly receiving FB/Twitter updates about both.

Anyway, my mum is sending me an article about yoga and IVF what she read in the daily wail - apparently there is new yoga that can get you preggo when you have been a barren for the last 5 years. Guaranteed and everyfink. I really wish she wouldn't read such shite but I like to humour her because I know she's just being supportive.

Fuck, I am drowning in regret: I had sex with someone other than my boyfriend last night and now I feel like a hideous wretch. What am I to do? Why can't I be normal and simply behave like a sensible person? I awoke in the grounds of the Sheraton at 5.30am wearing a crown of brambles. I hate myself. I am also ovulating

BoWo did you use protection?

bored really? That's awful? How on earth did that happen? Where was your boyfriend last night? I've lost track of the thread a bit - were you going to a ball or a party of some sort last night that got cancelled?

Sorry that seems a bit blunt...bugs gave sound advice if you didn't...we've all done stuff we regret under the influence. I myself have a ball I will always look back on with shame . Are things tough in your relationship?

After a shit morning, a serious chat, a bit of a cry and an encourage the wayward droid bout of sechsing, things improved a bit. Stil ta for the cod of comfort rasp and bugs, and a kitten too :). We actually just had the john dory of deliciousness for tea. The day was okay in the end, met a friend for lunch, played on the slide with my youngest nephew. Then had a massive cry when I came homethis afternoon, then cooked for two solid hours as I have a book/cook club at ours tomorrow and will be at work til just before.

Oh dear BoWo. Good practical pointers. What happened, or don't you remember? I have no how to deal with it advice, sorry. Happy to share the cod if need be.

I am not entirely in love with my boyfriend but this is no excuse. The ball was horrendous; I drank far too much and drained the mini bar when my chap fell asleep in the hotel room. I went downstairs to look for some action and found myself arguing about St. Augustine's philosophy of grace, of all things, with a group of academics from Edinburgh Theological College. I called the Archbishop's nephew a twat and went to the loo. I don't remember much after this except fumbling around in a tiny thicketed garden and telling this poor man to 'shut the fuck up and get on with it'. I woke up, freezing and alone, with my hair entangled in foliage and semen on my silk shoes, of all places. They are ruined (and so am I).

I will go to the chemist on Monday

Have some comforting cod and lots of paracetamol and water. Get yourself checked out as well as to the chemist on Monday. And maybe try to decide whether you actually want to be with your boyfriend :(

bored I'd second what others have said about getting properly checked out. If nothing else maybe go to the Docs for a general check up. You put yourself in a very dangerous situation and it seems like you are very low :( which is probably why you did it. Do you really want to be with your boyfriend or have a baby with him?

I cannot seem to shake off past behaviour or live by the normal rules of society and this is something very troubling to me as it makes me quite unfit to be a mother. I know I need to trample my demons - not more therapy, please! - and dump the boyfriend but I've been terribly lonely for several years before meeting him. He is a published poet and I find him interminably dull yet kind. I am dismally unsure about men in general ever since my ex-husband stole a lot of money from me and fucked off with my assistant, but how long can one tolerate the warblings of a poet?

I am sorry to bring these woes to your thread when I am a newcomer. You have problems of your own and I shall retreat to sort out my life. I wish you all much luck - you do seem lovely girls.

I don't think you should write yourself off bored, it sounds like you've had a rough time, give yourself some space and make sure you go to the Drs.

I second rasp. Hangover day after disasterous evening is not the time and place to make decisions. However, the boyfriend does not sound like a good match and perhaps some demon-clearing needs to be done. But today heal yourself, tomorrow get yourself checked out. And before it's summer decide whether this is the right man for the baybee winning project...