It is a fact universally acknowledged that a woman in her thirties in possession of a ticking biological clock MUST be in want of a baybee.

[ArielThePiraticalMermaid]

The former thread proved full of sadness and most vexatious disappointments, wherefore we know not :(. Therefore the BESH will be donning their empire dresses and enlisting the assistance of Captain Wentworth and his admirable breeches and Mr Darcy smouldering damply in his transparent white shirt both of whom with their pleasing countenances and sound judgements and enormous fortunes, in short both of whom are everything a young man ought to be in the expectation that happier times may be ahead for the BESH.

Cheese and fudge? How absurd.

One should eat quails' eggs and suchlike.

Yo BESH. Have been lurking around keeping up but was not sure I could offer much other than support/sympathy so have been quiet. However cheese containing fudge has roused me from my silence. WHY have i not heard of this before???

I found it on the deli counter at Tesco. I thought I was buying regular Wensleydale with cranberries.

So I saw the immunologist again. And he mentioned fucking LUPUS

If that's the case, no babies for me.

What's lupus?
Also CHEESE and FUDGE?
*flees to the New World

Positive opk! Action stations!

Lupus? Oh my God.

Oh rie, fingers crossed that it is another spanner of a local doctor. Would it definitely mean game over for baybees?

Rie that sucks. Do not start googling it though, there is a lot of misleading stuff on t'int about lupus, always depicting worst case scenario (as always). A friend of mine has it and manages it really well. I think it's often mis diagnosed too. (((((Hugs)))) when will they do more tests?

Me too, around this morning!

Also rie I've got a friend with lupus and I understood pregnancy is perfectly possible, just risky, so you'd need to closely monitored. Apart from that listen to the wise hags. The menopause he said bugs, what an idiot.

Did you managed to rally the soldiers, capt'n?

Hopefully it's a possibility rather than a probability, rie. I'll keep my fingers crossed.

We got a round robin email this morning - an old friend is a new father. New baby's middle name and the photos are astoundingly pretentious, we giggled (but felt mean while we did so). We must be bad friends...

Sorry about the nobber doctors. I think some of them totally lose the ability to see people as more than just fascinating meat machines after a while

I did indeed rally the troops. The troops were most enthusiastic. My temps all to cock* this morning though as we were a little in our cups last night, so will have rely on opks for few days and hope OV makes itself very obvious.

Good luck with the sextuplets, bugs!

*snigger

Stoopid drs. Rie let's hope this is another false alarm, like the earlier allergy panic.

Bugs if you get sextuplets, can I have one? Pretty please.

That's it though - he took one look at my eyes (as I had conveniently had an attack whilst driving to the hospital - driving through city traffic with your eyes closing up and wheezing like a bastard isn't something I'd recommend) and said he didn't think it was an allergy after all because it was clearly fluid round the eyes. And then I described how they take three days to subside fully and he reckoned if you catch an allergic reaction with antihistamines then it ought to make everything go down.

I don't know. Maybe it's another sign it really isn't meant to be and I should adopt and little African baby like Madonna.

Ariel I would say ignore him until he proves anything, otherwise it's just scaremongering. And if you are going to adopt I suggest a penguin as they is flufffy

Hello. I've been skulking in the shadows for a while and believe you all to be thoroughly good eggs. I am sorry some of you are having a tough time. I myself am close to committing harakiri with a butter knife. May I join?

You mentioned butter knife. That is reasonably close to butterdish which is a good start. You know the form if you've been lurking. Seek the BESHtionnaire and ye shall find.

1. Do you like gin? Only on days ending in 'y'

2. Men - are you a gold digger or a cradle snatching cougar? My boyfriend can't remember Angie from Eastender

3. Baybee-making - to put a baybee in your tumtum, which hole do you use:
   a) weewee
   b) poopoo
   c) foofoo
   d) none, you just pray to the baby Jebus.

My wizard's sleeve

4. Testing - when someone wonders if they should test for updiff (pg), do you: a) bellow 'POAS!' at them non-stop and punch them repeatedly in the kidneys till they wet themselves anyway. b) Sprinkle them with babydust and send them hugs and kisses on lickle baby angel wings.

A

5. Is R2D2: a) an adorable robot from Star Wars. b) the source of all evil.

B

6. Number of pets? A llama called Tina

7. Inappropriate (read: weird) crush of shame? Prince Philip

8. Lesbian crush? My nan

9. What are your views on camping? Common. I like to go glamping in Accrington

10. How much money have you spent on sticks you then urinate on?
    i) Oh nothing, I'll probably catch first time and then get the doctor to confirm it.
    ii) Over 100 quid
    iii) I opened an account on ebay solely for the purpose of purchasing sticks

...excuse me a moment, the bailiffs are here...

Finally, tell us how you found the BESH and why you'd like to join us pliz.

I was searching for Bosch speakers for sale and pressed several wrong keys (that'll be the gin).

Do I win owt?

at searching for Bosch speakers and finding us. That must mean impressively fat fingers or a lot of gin, which is a good sign. Although really your Crush of Shame puts Clarkson in a whole new, relatively attractive, light

Are you also over 30 and committing hariki because of an uncooperative womble, I think you might well be in.

Sorry aries. That is all SHIT. Although I've never hurt of lupussy eyes, my friend mostly has long complaints. But hold of the changing of life plans until it is "certain, absolutely certain" (gratuitous Mr Darcy quote).

I intend leaving here and never coming back.

The reason? Someone in the world, other than the Queen, has a crush on Prince Philip. To think I was ashamed of John Barrowman

Who is John Barrowman (the bailiffs took my telly)?

LemonDrizzle, I am over 30 and my womb has started filing its nails (see username).

you make me smile, that has to be good sign. Although like rie I am a little distressed about princeP. And I'd go further, I don't think the queen fancies him either, that is not her type. Clearly he was a suitable match and that was that.

OMG John Barrowman is not shameful at all! I loved Torchwood so much.

Also, I say you're in, bo, at least partly because you made driz admit that Clarkson is strangely attractive