TTC 10+ months Part 13

[buzzybee123]

A very friendly and supportive thread for those taking way longer than they had ever expected to make a baby.

driz thanks for the advice. I hadn't thought of that about nurofen. I have to say they have never stopped my period cramps, but as I want this out, I will switch to paracetamol. I haven't spoken to any dr to get advice about what to do, but I am learning a lot from the interweb!

And thanks for the warning about what to expect. I have read some nasty things about the expelling cramps. It isn't far off a normal period at the moment. I'm going for acu tomorrow to try to speed things along so the worst hits before I travel.

seaview it's very controversial. The HFEA doesn't have anything good to say about it (there is a page on the HFEA website) but it makes a lot of sense to me. However, it didn't work in my case. But perhaps there was something else at work stopping sperm meeting egg so there was no benefit to suppressing the immune system then. There are plenty of pred babies being born to the women on the Pred thread on here.

sar when is OTD?

pout nelly makes a very good point. I bet if you had been asked on the way down to EC if six fertilised embies would be good, you would have thought it was great.

Critter thanks for your kind words. I'm counting on 25 years of minging period pains being good prep for this. It's great that your mum understands but how awful that she had to go through all that.

Madness I had the same fear about following in my mum's footsteps (one successful preg, three mcs, fairly early menopause). It's one of the reasons I was never optimistic about my pg working out. I guess that pessamism at least helped to prepare me.

joy I hope you are doing ok.

Good luck to all those moving on to IUI and IVF soon.

Very quiet on here today... How is everyone?

Euro - how are you doing today? Pain is manageable I hope.

Sar - are you feeling good? Cheering those embies on

Lemon - I read your post abt your miscarriage. So sad. I'm so sorry you had to go through it.

At euro's advice I have been reading all abt hefa's view on immunes. . I'm more confused than ever.

Just a short catch up at lunch. Sorry I didn't name check everyone. X

Hello sea The immunes stuff just worries me so I avoid thinking about it!

buzzy I am so excited for you. Glad that things are underway. You too madness Exciting times ahead. Your AMH result was brilliant. I know what you mean a about managing hope. I swing between strong optimism and despair about it. MrP reckons I ought to enjoy this time and enjoy the fact that there is a bit of real hope. It is just so hard though to know what is best.

lemons I was also so sorry to read about your MC. You ladies are all so brave.

nelly thank you for your wise words. You are right 6 embies would have sounded just fine I just think the unexpected harvest was a red herring for me & threw me off a bit. I hate that programme. It seems so ridiculous to think that putting someone with an eating disorder around an obese person and then making them stuff their faces with obscene amounts of junk is so counter productive. FGS I love a bit of junk food myself but l would have a fecking breakdown if I was faced with a mountain of crap to eat. Of course the woman was preggers. It's always the same on Location, Location, Location Revisited too Grrrrr

euro How are you feeling today? I didn't know that Ibubrofen wasn't advised. I really am a bit cross on your behalf that you haven't had enough guidance over what to expect or what to do.

joy I am thinking of you today too. Are you feeling okay?

critter I'm loving the sound of your makeover. We were given a Persian rug but it is in a friends garage and has been for the last year. I keep nagging MrP to retrieve it. It's so nice that you have such a good relationship with your Mum and that you had a lovely time with her.

rabbit Are you okay today?

I am having bum bullet Cyclogest fun - not! Do any of you know how long it takes for the suppository to be absorbed into your body? I ask because I have got an upset tummy and keep losing the suppository after a couple of hours. Do you reckon that is enough time for the Progesterone to have absorbed or do I need to put a fresh one in? Also when you had your ETs did you put one up before hand in the morning? I am a bit horrified at the thought of having my ET with a bum full of gunge [way TMI smiley] Oh the glamour is becoming all too much

pout to be fair, there is help out there, but I haven't sought it. I will if I need to, but frankly the body is designed to get rid of duff embryos so I hope to be able to just let it get on with it with the help of the good drugs. I just can't face sitting in a EPU with other preggos for hours waiting to be told what I have already figured out from the internet. I've actually got an appointment booked with my GP this Saturday (was going to ask for a referral for an ERPC in case I needed it, but it looks like I should be able to cancel now).

I'd say a couple of hours is fine. If you use the front door, it all tends to slither out after a couple of hours anyway. You could use the front door today while your stomach is upset? As for ET, if you are using the back door, there shouldn't be anything visible. I was using the front door and just made sure I inserted it a few hours before ET, so it could absorb before they cleared it out up there. I'd say you should definitely insert as normal before ET to keep your hormone levels up.

Drizz I had to move on to codeine today anyway. I've never taken it before. But the pain was absolutely bloody awful this morning. I've been out to acu and to pick up my laptop from the office, so I can work from home this afternoon, but I'm not sure how much I will get done. I might just have to take myself off to bed. It's like a mega period. In fact, I think that's pretty much what it is. I would have been 8 weeks today, so I think it's two cycles' worth of "stuff" in one.

sea I read that and then went ahead and did the tests and treatment anyway. For the opposite view, have a look on the immune testing board over at fertility friends. There are loads of women over there doing the tests and having some success. What is even more confusing is that the consultant at my clinic pooh-poohed the NK cells stuff, but then recommended Pred (the usual treatment for high NK cells) after ET! Talk about mixed messages. [confuse]

joy I hope you are doing ok and are not overdoing it.

quick post from me. pout 6 is very good, you buy eggs in sixes so it must be a good sign. Will it be transfer tomorrow?

euro it sounds like things are getting going. I'm so sorry you have to go through this. Going to bed sounds like the best plan. lemons big hugs to you, you've had an awful experience. I think people can downplay the trauma of a miscarriage. It is a big deal.

joy you are amazing. GA can make you sick, I was very nauseous the day after the lap. It could also be the shock and stress. Please take it easy. Do you have any nice things planned to look forward to? I've decided to book something for every month, even little things like a concert or a cinema trip give me something to focus on other than ttc.

rabbits that fsh sounds ok to my untrained ears. You qualify for nhs treatment so yay to that.

sar I'm thinking of you, one day at a time. x

Euro ? oh poor you. i do remember the pain very well. I had organised some event at the races and I was trying to hide the pain from the people I was with. People kept asking me whether i was ok. I was intent on carrying on but i just found myself in some horror show in the loos for an hour. I think it is a mega period but obviously more as your body is contracting to get everything out. Are you feeling ok emotionally? I?ve decided that as long as erpc is successful and there is no complications and no infection ? it?s a lot easier than a natural m/c.

Mrsd ? we do have something planned. I had to cancel my course which was going to be me starting a whole new thing/career so i could start my own business. But the m/c coincided with the start of the course. So i now have the time and the money from the course so we have booked a beach holiday to the Caribbean at the end of May. A place where kids are not welcome because let?s face it other people?s children are so annoying when you are on holiday. I was intent on saving all my money for more ivf at some point but i think for Roy and my health and happiness , we need a break. When does everything start for you?

Pout ? I was told by my gynae that cyclogest gets absorbed pretty much immediately. I was on 3 a day and I put one up there the morning of ET day and at midday just before . Do you know i didn?t even think that the doc would see the back hole and all its horrors. Is the cyclogest causing the upset stomach? I noticed that it affected my bowel system.

Sea ?

Critter ? i?m glad you had a good time with your mum. It?s so wonderful that you have such support from your mum. I have to say mine has stepped up to the mark and she has called me nearly every single day over the last few months. She even rung me to say that she had seen Jane Torvill break down in tears on Piers Morgan stories when she was talking about miscarriage and failed ivf. Not quite sure of her point but I think she was trying to say i ?m not the only one out there!

Madness ? can i ask how many rounds are you getting on the nhs?

Buzz ? i can?t believe you are getting so close.

Sea ? i told the nhs consultant the other day that i had an immune issue and she couldn?t have been more dismissive. But then if you look in Dr Beer?s book, he thanks people who stood by him whilst he named a particular doctor at St Mary?s who was shouting from the roof tops that his immune treatment was utter bollocks. The consultant i saw is this doctor?s colleague so i don?t expect anyone there to believe in them. The thing is there have just been no official studies and until the hfea approve things, people in the nhs can?t think beyond the box. but honestly the results at some of these clinics who use immune treatment speak for themselves. It seems to be used as a matter of course in America but then that?s all private. Mind you , after all the immune treatment i had, i wonder whether did more damage than good!

Thanks joy. I do suspect an ERPC would have been the easier option. I will get through this. I feel a bit whacked out on the codeine at the moment. :)

Sea/ joy the drs at St Mary's do seem to be very anti-immunes. And I take the HFEA's point that there hasn't been much in the way of large-scale clinical trials to back up immune treatment. But clinics that use it do seem to get results. My smear scare after 6 months of Pred really freaked me out though. I think my immune system was "up" for a reason (dealing with the HPV virus) so knocking it down with drugs was not good. I have very mixed feelings now about all the immunes stuff. I know a lot of folks on immunes treatment have a successful pregnancy after mcs, but I know people who have done that without the treatment, so it is really difficult to know what to think.

Sorry that is all a bit muddled - the codeine has my head swimming!

euro Oh you poor love. I wish it wasn't so painful. It is just miserable that you have to suffer like this. Please try to rest and take time off as needed. Really looking forward to seeing you next week. I hope that this is over quickly for you.

pout thinking of you and your little embies and willing them to grow and grow. Does your clinic give you daily updates?

joy I agree with mrsd, you are amazing. I think a Caribbean holiday is just what's called for. You and Roy need some time to recover from this awfulness, and a sunny break may help. Thinking of you.

lemon it made me so sad to read about your mc and it's so unfair that you're still here.

madness sorry to have confused you and free. French crime drama sounds fun and more educational than my current crap American telly of choice, The Bachelor.

mrsd you must be coming up close to your first IVF appointment soon. Sounds like there'll be a whole clutch of us.

rabbit I am sorry about the numbers, it's horrible to get a nasty shock and to be reduced to a figure. But as others have said, they don't necessarily mean anything - and you're still eligible for IVF. So screw it, I say. How do you get a consultant? It's crap that you're not getting proper consistent care.

sar I am thinking of you and sending sticky vibes your way. Hope you're surviving this horrible wait with sanity intact.

sea January 2014 seems a really long way away. That's outrageous that the wait is so long - ten months - and yet if you decide to go private you lose your NHS go. If you can afford it financially I would be tempted to go private before then, but of course it's a huge decision.

Welcome angel, sorry you find yourself here.

buzzy exciting that you're getting the meds already! It's so soon now. I have a really good feeling about Brno.

Well I ovulated on Sunday, according to my chart - on CD 72. We had a quickie on Saturday morning and on Weds and Thurs nights, so I suppose there is a small chance we caught it, but if I'd known I was going to produce an egglet I would have launched a full-force shagfest offensive on Sunday. Hey ho. It's almost more stressful ovulating once every 3 months than not at all. I'm meant to start the downregging process in two weeks so I'm going to email my doctor to tell him. I think we'll probably go ahead with IVF anyway.

Sorry I made people sad with my mc-experience, I only put it down for euro's benefit, as it shocked me at the time. And it has been six months now, I talked it over and over and it is fine. I am just quite scared of eventually getting pregnant and it happening again.

It does sound like it is on its way euro. I hope you're under a duvet somewhere and not suffering too much/anymore.

Rooting for the pouty sixes. And good luck with ET tomorrow.

Hurrah for the Carribean holiday joy. That sounds like a very good plan. Healing is so important.

I know nothing about immunes sea. But I concluded based on no evidence except frequent colds that was not one of our problems. I have been taking extra vitamin D for the past two months on quasi-woo but it was recommended by our clinic.

Welcome to angel I hope you won't have to be here long.

Critter great you had your panda ovulation. Let's hope it puts all the IVF plans off indefinitely :) Shagging the day pre-ovulation is supposed to be very good!

Waves and tail feathers to all of you!

pout I use the bum candles at night so no gunk to deal with :)

sar how are you holding up

rabbit big paw squeeze

euro I hope its all over for you soon

sea I suppose its what you believe where the immunes are concerned, I believe in them, I wasn't going to be fobbed off with 'its just bad luck' crap regarding my miscarriages, my second one happened just after I had had my flu jab, I don't believe it was a coincident. I'm not prepared to try again without the steroids etc, especially if I am paying £££££ for it, I want to throw everything at it to give it ever chance of success. So much of medical research and advancement would be classed as unethical at some point or other.

critter If you have caught the egg and you have shagged within the time then you should hopefully know in 2 weeks :)

Just popping in quickly to offer tight squeezes for the ladies having a shitty time. It's just not fair that it hurts physically, as well as emotionally. You are all so brave and real toughies. joy you made me snigger out loud when you said you weren't! I don't know how either your or euro are managing to work. Pleased to hear about your holiday joy and hope you are able to plan something similar euro. Coedine is good stuff. The drs can give you a stronger version if you need it.

pout the cyclogest is def absorbed in 2 hours. The carrier however hangs around longer and will be the gunk you mention. I swung between the shits and constipation after EC. Nice. Everything down there is all bloated and I think the sedation mucks things up too. The 2nd day after collection was my worse, so I'm sure you will be better tomoz. Btw I had a similar no.s to you in our 1st cycle and was specifically told that was a good no. of mature eggs. Even with icsi we only had a 40% fertilisation rate tho, so 6 embies sounds v good to me. Good luck tomorrow!

sar hope you are doing ok.

rabbits sorry about the test results. I've not had amh or fsh done, so don't know much about them, but if it's ok for the NHS, I reckon it's fine! Also haven't you had some odd cycles recently? Could they have affected it? Have you had an antral follicle count? And it really does only take one.

V exciting that so many peeps are near to AC cycles.

Waves to everyone else. Gotta go. Have the pleasing image of critter rocking out in her casbah spare room :)

lemon please don't apologise - it was helpful to know and understand what you've been through. I had no idea what mc entailed. I knew it was emotionally absolutely awful but didn't realise it was physically painful as well I hope I will better be able to support people going through it now I know. I can imagine it would be terrifying to think of going through that again.

buzzy I agree that there is clearly a lot that we don't fully understand about bodies, immunes, hormones etc.

gin it is totally 'Midnight at the Oasis' chez moi. All I need is a camel to sing to.

all right ladies. Sorry your cycle started mrsden. I know what you mean about not being able to summon up the energy to offer congratulations, we have been invited to view a friends 3 month old son who I am sure is super cute.

critter - huh spiral?- I forget what I say myself sometimes.

I did a test sea but it's negative so just waiting for AF now.

Lemon I for one was very glad that you shared. I found it really helpful to have some idea of what to expect.

joy the Caribbean plan sounds brilliant. I think we are going to opt for a very baby-unfriendly city break in Italy. :)

critter hurrah for panda-ovulation.

pout good luck for ET if it's tomorrow!

pout good luck for tomorrow :)

oh seaview I see AF also arrived. I am sorry about that.

Pout ? Your suppository story got me a bit loss. I have no clue about the IVF process at all. I really hope this works for you. Are you feeling good generally? Don?t think about the immune stuff. I hope you never have to know anything about it! Good luck for tomorrow.

Euro ? I hope the pain is subsiding a bit. It sounds very tough. Codeine is a like a warm hug. You are a tropper ? still working. Your work are lucky to have you! And you too Joy. How are you doing? Hope snake man is not bothering you at work. Hope you are both bearing up emotionally as well as physically. Euro ? where are you thinking of going in Italy?

Mrsd ? love your comment about eggs coming in sixes? quite right too.

Joy ? I am so glad you have a holiday booked. That?s great news and something lovely to look forward to. I couldn?t agree with you more about other people?s kids on hols ?

Critter ? sounds like you have been busy?. [smiling at your BDing] I hope it worked! If not, you have IVF coming soon I see. Yes, my plan is to go private and to lose the nhs round. I don?t want to wait any longer to start IVF, if I wait till Jan 2014 it will be more than 4 years.

Lemon ? of course you are scared of another m/c. I have never been through it but a really good girlfriend of mine had 2 m/c and I can see how painful it is ? both physically and emotionally. You are a brave lady. It?s sad that it happens so often and it?s so rarely talked about.

Freedom ? sorry it?s a negative for you too. I really hoped the IUI worked for you. I am v disappointed with IUI in general. Not just for me but I have been on the FF board and there has been no BFPs at all. I can recall one in three months.

Thank you to all of you to wrote about immunes. It?s really helping me. I am as confused as ever but I have decided to go to Taranissi for that reason. I have asked for a few opinions including a family member who is a fertility doc but not in the UK. She seems to think immunes is worth testing for ? the bloods but not the uterine one. Joy ? I am going to drop you a line over the weekend if that?s okay as I know you had your treatment there. You and Euro are quite right about St Marys being v anti immunes. I was there about a year ago and I asked about it and they told me absolutely not at all. It?s unproven etc. At the time I didn?t question it mainly because I thought immune was more often considered for reoccurring m/c s but I have now heard that it can also be an explanation for unexplained infertility. Part of me worry that I only want to get tested because I can?t handle not knowing what?s wrong and it?s nothing more than a need to ?find? a problem. Anyway? I will try not to self diagnose and will put myself in the hands of the docs. I am relieved to have a break for a few weeks actually ? no TTCing or AC and I will be away from Mr Sea. Almost like a rest!

Yikes terrible spelling.
Pout - terribly lost
Euro - trooper, not tropper!

sea I've wanted to go to Florence since I studied A Room with a View at school, so maybe there. Possibly Rome.

It's so unfair that you lose the NHS round if you go private.

I feel exactly the same as you - I really need a diagnosis. Being "unexplained" is awful. You are in this sort of limbo where you feel like you should be able to get pg becuase no one has found any reason why you can't, but it's just not working.

critter I'll have everything crossed for you.

pout how did you get on?

Driz I'm going to be terrified of another mc if we ever get another BFP. I've already told Mr Euro that if he can find some way to sedate me from EC to after the 12 week scan next time, that would be ace.

I'm feeling much better today. I'm back at work and in a very small amount of pain. I'm not even bothering with drugs. I can't believe that the worst can be over in just one fairly horrific day, and waiting for things to ramp up again, but cautiously wondering if it is.

euro I'm so glad you're feeling a little better - I hope that the worst is over. If it gets really bad again though, I hope you go home and rest. You have been dealing with this amazingly but don't feel you need to soldier on, please be gentle with yourself. If you decide to go to Rome, let me know - sister Critter used to live there and somewhere I have a list of the best restaurants and fun things to do that she compiled for another friend who was visiting. I can send it on to you.

sea I can imagine it would be incredibly frustrating to be 'unexplained'. I am that you lose your NHS round by going private. Nearly four years is a ridiculous amount of time to be dealing with this crap and in constant limbo. I really feel for you. I'm only two years in and already it feels like I've been waiting forever. These ladies should have great advice about clinics - I am so grateful for the advice on this board. I hope the immunes question gets sorted out for you.

free sorry about asking you about spiral (a French crime drama), I got confused and mistook you for madness who mentioned it . I'm sorry about the BFN. I hope your period arrives soon so you can move onto the next cycle! Don't feel you have to see the friend's baby if you don't want to - sometimes you have to protect yourself.

pout Is ET today? I am wishing you all the luck in the world.

joy hope you are resting - thinking of you.

sar not long now. Hope you're ok during this wait.

Waves to everyone else. Quiet here today! Hope you're all ok.

right, I've got period pains, heavy ones. the clinic have just called and said I have an HCG value of 12.2. Which is very very low but enough that they should check it. 25 is theorhetically positive but so insignificant that it doesn't really count. So I'm going for a follow up blood test tomorrow. fgs sake before the call I just shoved 6 booze chocolates in my gob due to period pains. and my temperature dropped from 36.9 degrees to 36.3 degrees C. I had accepted that it was over for this cycle. Stop playing with me.

Oh free . I can't believe there is another "wtf" on the thread. You poor soul. Lets hope it turns into good news, but I can understand how hard this must be.

Best of luck for ET pout

Hope the pains don't come back Euro. I too found Lemon's post about MC shocking, in a "I had no idea" way. How naive I am.

Short post again, luffs to all x

Crikey free that sounds like a headfvk. Can you remind me what you were doing this cycle (sorry - I've been so wrapped up in my own personal hell recently I have lost track ). Was it IUI? How many days past ov are you?

My HCG was 48 at 14 dpEC on my IVF cycle. I did a lot of googling because I was worried it was low, but plenty of women with low initial levels seem to go on to be fine.

critter if we decide on Rome, I will let you know.

Free! Pls pls let it be a BFP. I really really hope that it is positive news for you. Would be fab to have another IUI success story.

Euro - Rome and Florence are lovely. Just avoid August as it is so so so busy in Italy in Aug and it kind of takes away from the beauty. If you need any recommendations for places to eat/stay pls yell. Mr Sea is Italian so I have been many times. You deserve a break after everything you have been through. I am glad there was no need for pain relief today.

Critter - to be honest I kind of understand why nhs have that position. Not all the PCTs take that view which is what makes it the most unfair but I can kind of understand why they think if you can afford a cycle, you should pay. I am okay with it. I just worry about how many private cycles I may need before getting pregnant. I am trying to internally process how many we can afford. It's mostly my own fault. My "unexplained" diagosis lead me into a fault sense of security. Until I was almost 3 years into TTCing, I really didn't think it would be possible that I needed help. I was fooled by my good test results. I was v stupid.

Thanks sea. I had an Italian bf for a while when I lived abroad and explored a lot of the eastern coast and the south of Italy with him (mostly in August!), and have also been to Sicily many years ago, but the centre and west are unknown to me and somewhere I would like to explore.

I think my good results are why I found it so hard to come to terms with needing IVF. Nobody could tell me why it might help, or what "problem" it would overcome. But clearly it did help - I got my first ever BFP from it. But no one will be able to tell me why! I was ovulating before. My tubes seem clear. My lining has always been "textbook". So why did taking the egg outside my body and popping it back fertilised 2 days later do the trick? The only thing I can think is that it was actually a male factor ishoo and somehow the swimmers never made it as far as the egg and that changed when they only had to swim around in a petri dish.