Elderberry Pavlovas Unite - the over 30s TTC number 1 (thread 3)

[Bunnygirlie]

Hey ladies, we're over here!

bunnygirlie, 32, TTC since June, AF coming around New Year!
Twinklestar 2, TTC1, cycle 16, BFP was due 19/12
BraveLilBear,TTC
Lolcbcb,TTC
Aquarius,TTC
Happylass 34 cycle 4 BFP due Jan 1st
Navis176, 35, TTC #1, cycle 3 (this time around), bfp due around 19 Jan (I think?)
Neshie, 31, TTC #1, on cycle 9, after stopping the pill 18 months ago (took 10 months for AF to return!) BPF due 12th January Fx
MotherOfCleo TTC#1, cycle 3, 5dpo, BFP due New Years Day.
Viviennewestwould, 41, childless hag, TTC one year (mmc in March), on Clomid, ovulating today!
Pipbin 37 cycle 16 BFP due 26/12

Zombies, 32, almost 3 wks pg (by my calculation)- per standard
measurement from LMP, 6 weeks pg, PCOS.
MeanMrsMustard 31, 5 weeks pregnant.
Quod,33, PG
Purplemonster, PG
Janey 38, 12 week scan on Christmas Eve
HazleNutt, due June 21st
Rach, 34, 13+4 pg, due 26th June

Apologies if I've missed you or got something wrong

Oh and Bunny, sorry you're having a shit day too. Our poor knackered men! And poor desperate us! FX it all gets better for everyone very soon.

Thinking of everyone that's having a tough time and sending very un-MN hugs.

Quod hope you get better soon, look after yourself!

Welcome Retro

Aw, thanks so much for the encouragement, ladies, I feel such a tit for freaking out when there are people on this thread who are properly suffering. Thinking of you, Quod, and the absolute shitness of your situation. Please try not to descend into the madness which would have you believe your fertility has been compromised. It really hasn't. I hope the ABs get to work soon x

Bunny, I have been exactly where you were this afternoon (but not with your husband, might I add). Might a little alcohol help with the nerves? As recovering alckies me & my DP are always bemoaning the fact that we can't just get sloshed and drown the nerves a little. I was serious when I said introducing porn had helped us out this month. DP was dead against it (didn't feel the need to see 'other' women on screen as he loves me and my body so much, blah, blah) but this month, when he had to perform on the morning of ovulation and couldn't ejaculate to save his life I put the laptop on and went to a free porn site I used to star in knew of. It did the trick.

Captain, when my day 21 progesterone (pre-Clomid) was 18.5 I was told I had not ovulated. I have since learned that you can, indeed, ovulate having this score but you are unlikely to be able to sustain a pregnancy.

Michael still hasn't returned from the match and he isn't answering mine or my mother's calls. I am terribly worried. I have to worst feeling he has been drinking.

ahhh viv I hope he is home soon free of booze and you guys make up xx

He is home and he is wasted. My wonderful, selfless, magnificent man is staggering drunk. He is laughing in my face saying he has been drinking 'for months'. We are finished. I am beyond devastated but I am apoplectic with rage that he has been deceiving me and my family, who adore him. I am lost. Where do I go from here? 2.5 years of sobriety he has thrown down the drain. He is respected, loved and admired by everyone who has watched and been a part of our recovery. He has a son. He has a new job. My life is now over as I knew it but I know his life is over full-stop. I am beyond devastated that he has allowed me to waste a year of my life trying for a baby with him. I'm losing my mind.

Viv what ever you do now, please don't drink. You have done so well staying sober.
If he will do that to you then I think it is better to end it. Hard I know, but I think it's for the best.

Oh Viv I am so sorry. What a horrible shock. Without knowing either of you my initial reaction is that you need to wait until he's sobered up and you've calmed down and have a good talk about it all. It sounds like you've been through a lot already and things might look different in the cold light of day so sleep on it and see how you both feel tomorrow x

Viv I am really sorry too, you must be furious. I agree with Rach about sleeping on it and looking at the situation with fresh eyes tomorrow. I don't know much about alcoholism but I would imagine that relapses are unfortunately quite common, especially in times of great stress? Sorry you are having to go through this.

Really sorry to hear that Viv, hope you get things sorted.

So, so sorry to read that, Viv - I can't imagine how you must be feeling right now. Am going to echo the same thoughts as the others: As quod said, it must be so bloody difficult to stay straight in times of stress. It's a massive kick in the stomach for you though. Also, Pip's right; Please look after yourself and don't fall into that same awful trap. I think Rach is right too- perhaps a fresh, sober look at things in the morning might help a little? Obviously something major needs to change, but what that is doesn't need to be decided straight away, and certainly not without thrashing it out when everyone is able to think and speak clearly.

viv firstly he is drunk and drunk people talk shit! At least I do. Secondly he is hurt and is lashing out trying to hurt you back, not big or clever but very possible.
As the others say, sleep as if youll be able to sleep on it and try to have a sensible discussion tomorrow. He may have felt as down and upset as you did this morning and instead of being sensible and talking to you or a friend he turned to drink, a shitty substance that used to seem like a friend to him.

I hope when he wakes up he realised the gravity of what he has done. He loves you and wants to start a family with you, that doesnt just disapear, I think he is just lashing out as a way of feeling in control of something. Thinking of you xx

Sorry to everyone who is having a shitty time. Viv and Quod, unmumsnetty hugs to you both

Wise words, mother.

Oh Crikey I feel bad now having my little whinge.

quod thinking of you and wishing you a speedy recovery so you can get back to DTD!

viv hope things aren't as bleak as you thought last night

Hugs to those that need them!

I know I'm being the voice of doom and gloom here but Viv you have to take stock and think if this is a relationship that you want to bring a child into? I know that it will not be a popular thought but I think this is a real time to think things through and discuss them with your DH.

Good afternoon ladies, hope you are all as well as can be?

New year, fresh start so do you think we need an update on where everybody is at? I have lost track over Christmas and New Year! Who's next in the POAS queue?

Apologies if anyone is wrong or missed off. I have just copied from the last list I could see.

bunnygirlie, 32
Twinklestar 2,
BraveLilBear,
BelissimaLol,
Aquarius,
Happylass, 34
Navis176, 35
Neshie, 31
MotherOfCleo
Viviennewestwould, 41
Pipbin, 37
Quod, 33
Zombies, 32
MeanMrsMustard, 31
Purplemonster
Janey 38
HazleNutt, 34
Rach, 34, nearly 16 weeks pg, due 26th June.

Hi Rache

Im on my phone so cant copy but Ive included mine below.
MotherOfCleo, 29, cycle 5, TTC#1, BFP due Feb 1

How are you feeling Rache?

Apart from severe knackeredness I'm good thanks Mother Back to work tomorrow could be a challenge! I've added you on

bunnygirlie, 32
Twinklestar 2,
BraveLilBear,
BelissimaLol,
Aquarius,
Happylass, 34
Navis176, 35
Neshie, 31
MotherOfCleo, 29, cycle 5, TTC#1, BFP due Feb 1

Viviennewestwould, 41
Pipbin, 37
Quod, 33
Zombies, 32
MeanMrsMustard, 31
Purplemonster
Janey 38
HazleNutt, 34
Rach, 34, nearly 16 weeks pg, due 26th June.

Hello - hope everyone is feeling OK today? Especially thinking of quod and viv.

I'm going to add myself to the list, although I'm afraid I can't bring myself to put 'BFP due' because it never bloody is!

bunnygirlie, 32
Twinklestar 2,
BraveLilBear,
BelissimaLol,
Aquarius,
Happylass, 34
Navis176, 35
Neshie, 31
MotherOfCleo, 29, cycle 5, TTC#1, BFP due Feb 1
Viviennewestwould, 41
Pipbin, 37
Quod, 33
Boodle, 29, Cycle 17, TTC#1 AF due 19th Jan
Zombies, 32
MeanMrsMustard, 31
Purplemonster
Janey 38
HazleNutt, 34
Rach, 34, nearly 16 weeks pg, due 26th June.

I'm on the app and can't for the life of me figure out how to copy and paste... Can someone do it for me?

Janey, 38, just about 14 wks pg

Quod - hope you're bearing up ok. Hear infections are horrible but very common - and generally clear up pretty quickly with no nasty side effects...

Viv - thinking of you and what you must be going through today, either way

Hugs to you both

bunnygirlie, 32, cycle 8, AF due end Jan
Twinklestar 2,
BraveLilBear,
BelissimaLol,
Aquarius,
Happylass, 34
Navis176, 35
Neshie, 31
MotherOfCleo, 29, cycle 5, TTC#1, BFP due Feb 1
Viviennewestwould, 41
Pipbin, 37
Quod, 33
Boodle, 29, Cycle 17, TTC#1 AF due 19th Jan
Zombies, 32
MeanMrsMustard, 31
Purplemonster
Janey 38, just about 14 wks PG
HazleNutt, 34
Rach, 34, nearly 16 weeks PG, due 26th June.

CD 10 here and still not DTD yet this cycle

Feeling bloody awful today, haven't had a drink since NYE but feel like I drank several bottles of wine last night. I'm guessing I either ate something that doesn't agree with me or I'm getting ill AGAIN!

Ah bunny poor you, I seem to have had a permanent cold since November so can empathise. Roll on spring and the end of these winter bugs!

Should have said my due date is 9th July.

bunnygirlie, 32, cycle 8, AF due end Jan
Twinklestar 2,
BraveLilBear,
BelissimaLol,
Aquarius,
Happylass, 34
Navis176, 35
Neshie, 31, cycle 9 TTC#1, AF due 12 Jan
MotherOfCleo, 29, cycle 5, TTC#1, BFP due Feb 1
Viviennewestwould, 41
Pipbin, 37
Quod, 33
Boodle, 29, Cycle 17, TTC#1 AF due 19th Jan
Zombies, 32
MeanMrsMustard, 31
Purplemonster
Janey 38, just about 14 wks PG, due 9th July
HazleNutt, 34
Rach, 34, nearly 16 weeks PG, due 26th June.

8dpo here

Oooo Neshie, not long until POAS time