Fantastic 40+ Thread - Part Eight.

[goldengirl71]

"Come on ovaries! Let's get this party started, yeah?"

[hippychick66]

Just a quick post for miasmum - just read your post about the inquest. So sad to read. My goodness you are such a strong woman. Sending all my love to you and your DH and your gorgeous little bump. X

[CaliBee]

Raaaaaaaa.....af arrived. Painful and heavy. Going back to bed hmphhh.....

[Diege]

Morning all Gum it's looking really good on the temp front isn't it! I'd hold off testing if I were you and go on temps for now.
Miasmummy You are being so strong and have been throguh so much. I really feel for you, and at the same time am amazed at how wonderful you have been in dealing with the inquest. Thinking of you xxx
Golden how goes it with the clomid/temps? I would also forego the advice to abstain from ttc-ing for dentistry work - you don't need that bit of advice on top of everything else!
Irish fingers crossed for you for this month!
Cheese is it this Weds you have your scan? Totally understand your anxiety, having been there (as have most of us on this thread). We'll get the snug helicopter out to accompany you, if Hippy is happy to pilot as she usually does? xx
Calibee ahh blast it, sorry for af Even when you half expect your hopes start rising again every day it stays away. Hope it's not too bad a one x

Ok here, though having a bit of a moral dilemma... Dh has said that he would love another baby but thinks we have too 'much on' in the sense that his dm is ill/he is stressed at work etc. We had 'the talk' at the weekend (so much for my softly softly approach) at the weekend and he's still saying the same thing I know that if I was to get pregnant we would cope as his heart says yes (his words) but he's worried about the usual day to day stuff. My job is very secure, and have a new one to apply for (not applied yet gum, just looking at the form , deadline 10/11) plus have taken on some consultancy work that brings in an extra £150 a mth on top of salary. So financially we're actually sorted, plus ds1 starts school sept so will be one nursery fee down. Would it be naughty of me to be a little 'casual' with the temping??? Is that very wrong? I just don't want to look back in the future and think that rubbish imagined worries stopped us from at least trying to ttc (and I feel dh might regret it too going on what he says). What would you do?

[goldengirl71]

Gum, when you're excited..we're excited. I know you say you're not - and that is very sensible - but it's hard not to have raised hopes along with raised temps. DO NOT TEST YET.

Calibee, frigging bummer. AF is particularly nasty when you've endured a 14 day luteal phase. I'm so sorry

Irish, you are entirely sensible ttc. It's the right thing to do - you go, girl! [shakes pom-poms]

Diege, you know the answer to this one, sweetie: of course you must temp - just to see how your hormones are behaving. How old are you and how old is your youngest? You need to be checking everything is working so get your thermometer out and go buy your vitamins and a saucy outfit for the boudoir

Oof! Big, juicy dark line on the OPK just now. I'm off to the hospital for my first Clomid scan at 4pm. I'm very excited but I must stop fantasising that there will be multiple fit-to-burst follicles on the screen just waiting to pop out some potential babies [greedy emotion].

[Diege]

Thanks Golden . I am 42 (43 in May) Youngest dc will be 1 next Sunday.Tbh I have been temping all along for contraceptive purposes, so know I have a distinct shift after ov, and a luteal phase of around 11/12 days. So it would just a be a case of making a teeny 'adjustment' shall we say in the days the deed is done . Oh dear, am feeling very guilty even contemplating... Best of luck this afternoon. Exciting to at least be doing something positive when we usually have so little control. Make sure you report back asap!

[goldengirl71]

Look, Diege, what is there to feel guilty about? When you've been a member on a thread like this and you're 42 it would take a very unusual woman to be nonchalant about having a last child, especially when you're financially secure with a DH who would secretly like another. It's a no-brainer. You've travelled too many paths of other women's pain on here to be able to merrily ignore the desire for another of your own when the offer is more or less on the table. Go for it, girl.

You're right about the excitement that comes with having 'professsionals' dealing with my fertility. I don't feel so out of control. I feel listened to. I feel like I'm moving forward. The only side effect I've had from the Clomid is a distinct rise in my libido. Quite extraordinary - and very, very welcome.

I will report back as soon as I have completed my four-hour round-trip odyssey on public transport to the hospital.

[Diege]

I'm liking yout train of thought Golden. If dh were adamant he didn't want another baby because he didn't want another addition to the family, I think that would be something quite different from citing abstract worries about practical things that haven't happened yet...Of course, wanting to ttc and actually coming up with the bfp are as we know all too well, vastly different things... Hmmm, lots to think about.
Interesting about clomid and rise in libido! Is that a recognised side effect, or perhaps related to the thought that it's another step closer to the bfp? I can strangely feel my libido dragging itself off the ground in light of my recent musings

[goldengirl71]

Diege, no, it isn't on the list of side effets which the consultant gave me, but I haven't been able to keep my hands off DP and feel so loved-up it's pathetic. This does not happen to me around ovulation - quite the opposite, in fact. There is too much psychological baggage being hauled around with DP's erectile dysfunction issues for me to feel in the least bit horny. I have also been preternaturally wet & watery for three days now, although no EWCM (a drying-up of cervical mucus is one recognised down-side of Clomid but I am considering putting a lilo in my knickers and going for a paddle)

[goldengirl71]

Diege, act now...our chances of conceiving each cycle drops to an alarming 1% when we hit 43

[goldengirl71]

I'm sorry - I would dearly love to remove my last post as it doesn't help any of us. Fuck the statistics and think of Lolfactor

[littlepinkfizz]

What?? Only 1 %? Fuck that then. I'm 42. No chance saloon then for me. That's me out. Wasting money on opk's and frer tests. Fuck you Mother Nature

[Diege]

Lots of chances littlefizz!!! Ok, maybe not 'lots' but certainly there ARE chances, and you're more likely to be in the 1% (my consultant quoted between 5- 15% chance per cycle up to 45 - after that 1-2% - that's based on his own stats admittedly) if you use opks and temp etc etc.
Hmm, 6mths before I'm 43...decisions, decisions...

[littlepinkfizz]

I'm on cd 11 today and have really slippery cm which is very stretchy.it looks like ewcm but no smiley this morning. I feel the cb opk is wrong. Could I be right? Dtd yesterday and planning for every other day til next week. Probably just fooling myself and will manage to Dtd on the wrong days.

Sorry for being so pessimistic

[catdoctor]

Hello all, havn't been following you ladies for a while due to work frying my brain. I hope I can still pick your brains.

I think I was on last but last but last but one thread - you lot are impressively communicative.

Me 44, DS 2, have just finally stopped bf after long drawn out wean. I'm on 6th cycle now. Started with lp's of 9 days, started agnus castus and B6 but that cycle (5th) got ovulation cd23 (normally around 17) - bothered by this so didn't herb on 6th cycle, got ovulation d17, 11-13 day lp and a chemical pregnancy.
So, do I herb this cycle or not?? [Great oracle say 'temporal association does not prove causality', Catdoctor say 'do I take any chance I can?']

And, should I expect things to be screwy anyway post chemical preg?

ta muchly

[Irishmammybread]

Welcome back Catdoctor !
I don't know much about the possible effects of herbal supplements,someone else may be able to help. I'm taking Pregnacare Conception (and now on aspirin).
As regards a CP messing up your cycles, after both my later miscarriages (one at 10-11 wks and one at 12 wks but heart had stopped at 8w6d) my cycle was 35 days instead of my usual 28. I was charting temps the last time and know I ovulated on d 23 and had a luteal phase of 12 d. When I miscarried at 6 weeks I ovulated (and conceived though unfortunately that led to MC3) on d 14 so it would have been a normal length cycle.
I think everyone is different, it's not an exact science unfortunately!

[goldengirl71]

Ooooh, everybody, I'm blissfully happy and exited! The left ovary showed no action at all but my right ovary showed TWO follicles ready to pop out an egg each (one was 23.5mm, the other 25mm - the size of cherry tomatoes the doctor said)! Even more exciting...she injected me in my abdomen with something which guarantees both eggs will be released in the nexy 32-48 hours (so precise!) She told me I could refuse the injection if I wished, as the follicles really were fit to burst, but that she would like to guarantee the popping-out of the eggs due to my age and time being against us. She was such a lovely woman and I swear she kept talking in terms of my being guaranteed a pregnancy this cycle . However, she said I must not get too excited if, 14 days after ovulation I have not had my period as Clomid can extend the luteal phase considerably. She said I should wait three weeks from today to do a pregnancy test. If it's positive she will have me back at 6-7 weeks for a scan!

I really must calm down here, I know, but bloody hell! I already feel pregnant I am so happy! To know that in the next 48 hours (much sooner than that, I reckon, from this morning's LH surge) I have a guaranteed TWO eggs being released is a phenomenal feeling. When I texted DP just then with the happy news he texted back: 'No pressure then!' I am quite, quite fretful about his 'performance' tonight and tomorrow. So crucial! The doctor told me that sex tonight is not necessary and nor is it in the morning. Tomorrow night is when she would advise me to pounce. Of course, I am not prepared to wait until the 'prime' moment. Please, God, let DP be able to deliver....

[goldengirl71]

She also told me that if I don't get pregnant this month not to worry, as we will do all this again (scans and injection) next month. She said we will carry on until we get a result. I feel so looked after

[Diege]

Hey Golden that is such good news . I too feel like you have your bfp already and am also exicted about twins what with 2 eggs and all . Let's hope dh is up to the job eh...are you planning on doing it tonight and tomorrow??? Do you have any 'strategies' in place in case of the dreaded flop?
catdoctor I do have some experience of agnus castus, and vit B6, and for me they worked very well and resulted in ds2 (lengthened lp from 9 days to 11). I didn't personally have any issues with it messing up my cycle, but have heard from others this can be the case (usally if lp is fine anyway, and people just fancy trying it). Might be worth having a scan of old threads?
I tell you what, being on this thread is not good for holding back the ttc urge...all I need now is gum's blessing and I'm on my way!

[goldengirl71]

Sorry, but I keep remembering things and I'm conscious that some of you may be particularly interested/considering Clomid. I asked the consultant if it was purely the Clomid which had caused two eggs to be produced and she said yes. Obviously some women produce two naturally but it is still rare and she said I have responded brilliantly to this drug. Hurrah!!

Pink, like I said, if I could erase my thoughtless post about statistics, I would. Please ignore it. Like Diege said, we are surely in a much higher bracket of stats if we are temping, having really well-timed intercourse, are a healthy weight and not smoking/drinking. EWCM can be present for a good few days before ovulation occurs. The point is this kind of cm is the most fertile and will nurture any sperm deposited until the egg is released. You should DTD every other day from now until ov has occurred (if you have the energy). Good luck, love.

Catdoctor, I am not the best person to ask about herbs or alternative therapies simply because I don't believe in them. I am not dismissing your longer luteal phase - I just can't advise you on stuff I don't personally have faith in. It's medical intervention all the way for me, I'm afraid!

[goldengirl71]

Diege, "the dreaded flop"???!!! Don't freak me out before he's even got home from work! (Any seduction tips would be greatly appreciated...)

[Diege]

. Err seduction tips...the only (not very seductive at all) tip I would suggest (having been through a little of what you have with dh) is (if things seem to be taking a longer than bearable time) is to get him to do most of the 'action' outside for as long as possible before 'heading in' so to speak . It's worked for me

[goldengirl71]

Diege, wankthank you!

[Diege]

So you decoded my prudish advice correctly

[remnant]

Hello all

Can't really say I've caught up with this entire thread.
Much respect for mia's mum though!

I've been trying for dc2 for about 4 months with mixed enthusiam from DH. DC1 was a ridiculously easy conception just before my 40th, and I was sort of hoping that my luck would hold out for another but it doesn't look like it has. Current cycles are 24 days long and I think I'm ov'ing on day 17. Doesn't bode well. Agnus castus and B6 are not doing much for me and i've just had my 43rd birthday :( :(

I'm still bfing dc1 though, wondering if it's more likely that my age or the bfing that is messing up my cycles?

Anyway, here's to hoping for a lot of luck all round x

[goldengirl71]

Diege:

Remnant, I've heard it's hard to conceive when you're breastfeeding. Could this be the cause of misbehaving cycles? I don't know - I don't have any children but there are lots of women on here who can advise you. Welcome to the thread