TTC for 10+ months, part 9

[akuabadoll]

Ladies, number 9. The lucky one.

Hello ladies. Well the red bitch (the acronyms are too nice for her) got me good and proper this month. I woke up in the early hours of Tuesday morning with awful cramps and then when I got up for work, had a shocking migraine. Stupid hormones. Anyway am feeling much better now and have firs -half-of-the-month-mental-stability, wohoo.

Hi frannie. I'd go on your trip if I were you! I'm sure the jabs don't do anything really evil. But I'm a bit gun ho about that type of thing :/

So sorry to hear about the spotting buzzy, but it's not over until the red bitch shows. I think some people do get spotting in early pregnancy. And if this isn't the month, do remember iui takes a few goes a la lemons. Big hugs and hope you are ok.

nelly your hols sound lovely and muchos deserved.

lemons hope you are putting your feet up. Any obvious symptoms yet?!

mellow wow your lap came round quickly! Pleased to hear you are feeling ok and that they didn't find anything. Did you already know about the blocked tube? I think someone on here got preggers, who had a block tube? Hope mr m is looking after you.

care sorry about the tears at the weekend. It's such a tough process and it's only 3 months after our ivf that I feel normal and not too miserable about it. Have you got a plan? Was it you who said about being too young to give up and feeling like it's not happening to you. I totally feel like that - I think I have a few more years of various treatments before we look seriously at adoption. And I still can't believe that we need ivf, let alone that we've done a round.

teu and frannie sorry about the a* announcements. That feeling when you find out is just awful.

Hope your session last night went ok princess and that you found it helpful.

doll you made me laugh out loud with man jam and I sniggered like a naughty school boy at frotting! Reminds me of my early teenage years

Step away from the tests sar, well at least until the weekend! FX for you.

joy that's so shit that you've waited for so long for your hospital dates and they then clash with your holiday! Bloody sods law! At least it will all be over and done with and another thing off the list of things to be checked.

pout at your stealing a baby dream. Mr gin told me that a toddler was following him round the supermarket the other night and he was thinking about how it'd be easier to steal him than having all the treatment! I used the shag dictator (CBFM) for some time before we had the diagnosis. I now think there's no point and try to save the ££ rather than buying ov piss sticks.

coco welcome and sorry to hear about what you've been through.

Pleased to hear that I'm not the only one reading Christian Grey porn! I've zipped through the first book and thinking about downloading the next.. If joy can read them all, so can I! Apologies for putting inappropriate thoughts in your mind Nellie, but hey, at least they're happy thoughts?! Maybe reading porn will stop me obsessing about ttc?

sar you are my twin I had bright red blood and its 3 days early :(

thank you ladies for your sympathy I suppose its just hard accepting that it didn't work when I feel how could it not 4 fucking eggs and the sperm put in the right place, how could it fail right ???

X post lots of people! Sorry about the potential red bitch sar. It never gets easier. joy I think you have every right to be melodramatic! It's your b'day fgs. I was scared shitless just about sedation for EC, but it really was fine and I'm sure you'll be fine. If you mention your fear at the pre-op, they may be able to give you some anti anxiety meds to take on the day? For EC, my pulse was so high with fear that the nurse was worried, but the anaesthetist wasn't worried and gave me some anti-anxiety stuff once I was in theatre which was ace

Huge sympathy hugs and hand holding (and clutching to my bosom ala Lemons) to Buzzy, Sar, MrsM and belatedly Gin. One thing I thought in the shower this morning -it's hard to be sad when you're dancing. Tomorrow morning in the shower I want you to have a little wiggle and smile to yourself.

I love MrB's resourcefulness! Yes plan B is stealing one. Can we give him our orders?

Well I have entered new realms of desperateness woo in that I have been brewing proper full on Chinese prescription herbs ordered from Luxembourg. Taste is not too bad, only one mini gag so far. Have exercised every day this week and ate nearly perfect diet. Am determined to at the very least feel better and lose my immune and ivf drug pot belly.

Just a quickie as realise I've been absent today...

Sesh last night went well. Although I was on best behaviour, he looked at me and said you're an angry person aren't you, which I found disturbing as that must mean even when I'm doing polite and normal I still come across as an angry princess. I've been writing down all the things that make me angry to email him before my 2 hour brain re-programming next week. I wrote 7,000 words today!!!!!!! I really am angry he also wants me to write / consider a child free alternative future to remember that I'm a whole person with many facets and not just someone waiting to be a mother.

heart glad the book is useful, Hen has a great website too

MrsM well done for surviving your lap. Sorry about your blocked tube. Wishing you a speedy recovery.

Sar and Buzzy sorry about the spotting / bright red blood. Big hugs xxxx

Gin glad your are in phase sane. Also the nice shagweek and guilt free booze week too. Hooray!! at your porn obsession !!!

Joy you are not being melodramatic! Sorry it's a heap of shit all at once.

Sorry if I missed anyone, on phone in bed and knackered. Off away to the New Forest for a weekend of family birthday celebrations and getting in some spa treats on Sat morning, so will not be around for a few days. Wishing everyone lovely weekends, hugs xxx

Sorry for bloody bitch's arrivals gin and possibly sar.

The man telling you to deal with anger sounds wise and foolish in equal measures, princess. Although sorry if it was worse than you expected. Birthdays in the new forest sound good, though especially the spa part.

So sorry about the blocked tube missM, but massive well done on being able to post on here the day of the lap itself. I made no sense for all of that day (and felt like I'd been run over by a truck). Also Joy, very sorry about the date thing, and I would possibly try to move the lap. In any case wine-rabbit's rule of recovery, I think asks for a little more time off. I went back to working from home on Friday (after the lap on Monday) and was in the office on Monday. It did take a while to completely shake the GA (as it was only looking and flushing for me). But 2 weeks after the lap, I started crazy exercising again. Confusing messages about the endo heart. IN my hospital they are keen to remove all endo as part of the fertility work up, because they seem to believe even if it does not block the physical route for egg and sperm, it influences the environment negatively.

Well done for drinking chinese concoctions care. What is the plan now for you? Thinking of you!

Love the thought mrB had about just taking a nice toddler home from the supermarket I might have seriously considered stealing my nephew many times How is poutster? I miss you! And all the others? You were very quiet yesterday during the day and I had dull stuff to do. At the moment I am trying to convince myself to get started on some more interesting but hard stuff.

Someone asked about symptoms, and the answer is, not really, not yet... Still fart and burp like my DH. And I wake up in the night to pee (twice or thrice!) But that is it, so I still don't believe it.

Morning all

Just popping in quickly to say hi. I'll do a proper catch up later - i've been reading but been away with work so time to post has been limited. Hugs to those with spotting/ERTD, A* announcements, forthcoming appointments, recovering from appointments, holiday fun, impending shag weeks, 2WW mentalling... that's pretty much everyone covered hopefully

Well I'm out already this month and haven't even ovulated yet. Started with a urinary tract infection a few days ago that helpfully coincided with CD11 and what should have been the onset of shag week. No way. Who knew peeing could be so traumatic? Even walking is uncomfortable. I am not prone to UTIs and don't even know how I've managed to get this one, since I've been away so there has been no shagging at all. The GP raised a sympathetic eyebrow and told me that 'the female body is poorly designed'. No shit. What with the pH imbalance/thrush thing, then AF and now this, I feel like I never want to have sex again. And would you believe the day after the UTI started I noticed EWCM for the first time in about a year. The fertility gods are quite literally taking the piss.

Acronym city round here. Sorry. Now before I forget: Rabbit the month I conceived (feels weird typing that since it was so long ago and so brief) we only had sex 3 times. It was the good spontaneous kind rather than the oh-god-do-we-have-to NHS prescribed every other day nonsense. I am liking your theory. I am hoping that this month I can conceive without actually having sex at all

I shall be back later

Hi ladies, I wonder if I may join you? I like the look of your tent.

My DH & I are in our early 30s, have been shagging for Britain for 2 years, had 2 v early MCs/chemical pgs in that time, the last being about 18 months ago. We've been to the GP and had lots of normal bloods and SAs (the 'Usain Bolt of sperm' apparently ) and finally got seen at our NHS fertility clinic a couple weeks ago. They declared unexplained infertility and said we'll have to go straight to IVF after another year of waiting, and I'm (finally - why has no one bothered to look at my lady parts yet?!) going to be having an HSG at some point.

Anyway. I found the whole thing of finally being seen by the fertility people quite depressing (though they were nice), and have since decided to abandon my scepticism and give Full Woo a try, since, well, a bit of meditation, 'erbs, and needling can't hurt, right? And frankly, anything to help me feel a bit better and as if I'm doing some actively helpful.

But. Enough about me. Although, clearly I really need somewhere that I can talk about this stuff freely. Because OMGmental.

I hope to catch up with everybody's news soon. You seem a lovely bunch. And, I suppose, good luck to us all!

Morning all,

Quick hello to welcome Rum - you sound very similar to me, except they were looking at dodgy hormones to start with and now my hormones in the consultants eyes are A okay. It's very frustrating isn't it. You'll find plenty of support here and I hope you stay is short and sweet :)

Oh Artemis that sounds awful. You poor, poor thing. As someone who was nearly hospitalised by a UTI some years ago, I really do feel your pain and bid you a speedy recovery. Here have a big glug of Evian...

Lemons the therapist man was really, really lovely and insightful. He didn't make me feel angry. I just am an angry person and he saw straight through me! We're going to go through lots of techniques to help handle stuff better. As he said it's not a magic cure and I have to do the work but he can empower me with techniques and advice. Looking forward to weekend away after writing the 'me' dissertation yesterday. Glad you are feeling ok still :)

Well, I didn't mention last night but I have had really sore nipples and heavy boobs for the last couple of days and yesterday at the hairdressers I had a tiny jelly like lump of brown tinged stuff down there. Today (10DPO) I have the metallic taste, the sore nipples and a sickish feeling (but nothing really that bad) This is definitely fuelling mentalling. I'm refusing to test and I will be having small celebtratory boozes this weekend because I firmly believe this is a big practical joke by that well known comedian, Mother Freakin Nature. But I just had to get it out there. I even told DH I thought I might be pregnant and he just said. "We'll see. That would be nice but your body is still adapting to the diet and maybe it's things just stirring" I guess he is trying to protect me and himself from a very blue Monday if it's not the case. FX ladies, FX!

Oh bums, pressed 'post' before waving and shaking pom poms at everyone. Love to you all :)

Pompoms and crossed fingers princess. Enjoy your booze (just don't overdo it massively). I had my last drink 13dpo this cycle. And I don't regret it - it was lovely prosecco on a terrace :)

Hugs for buzzy sar and gin
Welcome rum
princess I have my fingers crossed.
artemis hope you are feeling a bit more comfortable.

thanks for your kind words. Actually got MrTeu to talk a bit the other night (in the ad breaks of Grand Designs). I underestimated him. He said that if it's what I want then we'll go speak to the doc Just have to find the time to call them now (silly busy at work). Not looking forward to seeing the updiffed at church on Sunday. Quite happy to leave this particular proverbial elephant sitting quietly in the corner for a while.
Waves to all, hope you have lovely weekends.

Eek princess. Sounds very promising. Dont drink too much - if it doesnt happen you'll think 'what if'. Fingers firmly crossed for you.

Hi Rum, tell us more about your woo plan, what exactly are you following?

Waves everyone else.

Thanks ladies only planning on one small drink each day. Probably posh champagne. Quantity not quality no buckets of gin, that's for sure :)

Errr I think that may have been one of them Freudian slips up there... I meant quality not quantity

Ooh princess - sounds a bit promising - I think you should have a few drinks but not get wasted (no combined circulation at this stage etc etc)

teu great that MrT exceeded your expectations.
artemis ouch! I've never had a UTI but have friends who can testify to what you're saying - poor you. hope you get better soon.
Welcome rum LOVE the 'usain bolt of sperm' I have been calling DH's supersperm, but might have to adopt your description please Tell us about woo - I'm looking up acupuncture here...care I'm not sure I can bring myself to do herb things. For a start, I'm going to go low alcohol and have already cut down to one coffee a day - that felt like quite the change for me

THanks for all your lovely wishes - I now realise I was in a pethidine induced euphoric haze and not feeling anything - the shoulder tip pain (weird ) kicked in last night and my tummy is so swollen and tender today. I am planning to go to work on Monday, but have arranged a low workload, but will let you all know how that pans out. Am currently sitting in bed, dosed up on ibuprofen, paracetamol and codeine and feeling shit. I may not make that much sense, but you might not notice the difference
So, someone asked (? joy ) about how they knew it was blocked - they put in a hysteroscope (camera into the uterus) to have a look there for bad stuff (don't know what they thought they might find, gremlins?) then left it there while put the scope into the abdominal cavity. Then they put blue dye from inside the uterus out and see where it gets to. And they couldn't get it through the left tube. I think they also tried flushing from the outside in too. They aren't going to try to unblock it in the future. I don't know what caused it. My left ovary was in a funny position, but not fixed down and there were not adhesions and they've put it back in the correct position - maybe it was something I was born with, maybe I had an infection at some point (but unusual to affect just one tube apparently) - who knows! Just that I have a 50% chance of success given eggs take it in turns to come from different sides.... (although I have never knowingly managed to ovulate without stimulation anyway..... )
Glad to have a plan, wish I had a guaranteed outcome

Frannie Where in Thailand are you going? I think you can safely get all the vaccines you need without worrying about pregnancy and unless you go inland, probably don't need to worry about malaria either. So, if just going to Bangkok and islands should be fine. Aim to have your vaccines when you have a period.
You need to have up to date polio, tetanus, diphtheria and pertussis (but ought to have those anyway - gives protection to your future baby that you WILL have). Hepatitis A is recommended - if repeat at 6 months then done for life, otherwise lasts about a year. Typhoid - lasts 2 years. And hepatitis B is recommended - and I think we should have it on the vaccine schedule in the UK, but that's another story.... pregnancy travel vaccines tells you about the vaccines in pregnancy.
Hope that helps, PM me if you want to know anything else xx

I'm sure I've missed people, I'm sorry!
sar sorry about AF and gin

I'm on my mini travels again clinging on desperately to August so brief post.

mrsm I proudly award you your laparoscopy medal of honour. I'm sorry about the tube though. But stacks who used to post on here got pregnant with a blocked tube, it took longer is all. And maybe ladygee? The first day after is rather poo. Mint tea helped me with the shoulder gas pain and mint cordial. Take it easy. It is surgery and I bet no man would be going into work on Monday after that!

artemis cystitis is the devils illness. I had it a lot on the pill and it's the utter pits. Angela Kilmartin has very good tips on managing attacks if you google. She says it's really important to take painkillers regularly as it helps to desensitise the nerve endings that make it so sore. Her tips have TOUCH WOOD kept me cystitis free for 10 years with only one exception. It will go away, even if it feels like it never will.

princess I'm glad you got to offload to someone with good skills, it can only be a helpful thing. Fingers crossed for you this month.

Will have to post and come back again, can't scroll back.

Part two.

teu I'm glad bear poking was successful. Your turn will come. For all any of us know, one day we will be sat, with our bumps whilst friends feel , fertility is a strange thing.

buzzy and sar I'm hoping it's a different kind of bleeding. I think it can happen at any point in pregnancy?

care bless you for only mini gagging! Do you brew them up? Loves to you.

heart sorry the date is approaching and making you wobbly. You sound so together and brave.

rum welcome! It's good to have good results, in spite of it being frustrating. May your stay be short and the ttc force be with you.

Lovely lemon I'm glad all is well, I love that you are still here, it feels very comforting.

mrsm I took precisely 10 days to feel 100% mended and unsore. My acu told me to drink loads of water to flush out the GA but im not sure if that's guff.

Well in spite of 5 days of ewcm by the bucketload my temp has not gone up today, I thought it would. Maybe I've chilled out too much and my ovaries have gone on strike. I feel like a hen whose egg laying days are over and I'm just kept as a pet to eat slugs.

Hi everyone.

Critter loving the Sudocreme on chin spots. Only one of the three is putting up a serious fight. It's great because it has a calming effect rather than the the drying effect of most spot creams, drying is useful but can lead to redness in itself. The active ingredient is zinc oxide, the old school name in the UK was Calamine, perhaps still is? Mellow spots below the nose are most often hormone related, above more likely to be caused by diet or environment (says Google, I guess, in my head from somewhere).

buzzy sar and gin so sorry to hear. It's just shit. Artemis what a horrid time, UTIs are indeed the work of the devil. On the up side it's well known that sex is optional for conception no wonder it's taking a while in my case

mellow well done on the lap. Sorry about the tube situation. It's not as straight forward as a 50% though is it? Not least because the released egg and working tube don't need to be on the same side, the possibility of egg nicking raises the chances a bit I believe. Not relevant perhaps if you need sim, but weird and interesting none the less. Take it easy.

care thanks for your kind words and for the expression 'mini gag'.

rum hello, may your stay be short and sweet.

Princess have a lovely weekend, put those very promising physical goings on to the side. But I'm expecting a full report on Monday morning.

Lastly, god small children are so annoying. I've been looking after two this week. Same age, same gender and each other's complete opposite in every other way. Completely different but equally hair pulling crazy making. I'm surprised so many of us make it out of the first few years in one piece.

X-post rabbit you are not a slug eating hen. Perhaps today is the day? Hugs.

Hello all, Can I join you?

i've lurked on many board for many years but never had the guts to actually post (until now).

My story in brief is that I started ttc just before my 34th birthday, was expecting to fall pregnant that month to be honest (the naivety of it all!) and of course nothing happened and that continued for many months. After a year went to doc and was diagnosed with undertactive thyroid, was put on thyroxin and GP was convinced that woudl sort it out. Another year passed and still no BFP. At this stage, I was 36, conscious of time and so got medically investigated with a view to IVF. All tests (hpg, lap and dye) came back normal, other halfs swimmers were fine and we we got unexplained subfertility.

We decided to pursue IVF, had one cycle and it was unsuccesful. At this point I thought that was it, I felt IVF was our best chance and it had failed. Afterwards, they suggested cauterising my cervix, my thyroxin was increased (it was a bit awry) and while preparing for IVF cycle 2, I conceived my son naturally, 3 years after we started. He's almost 3 and we've been trying for #2 for the last 20 months (had one miscarriage early doors and one recent chemical pregnancy) and of course, being the ripe old age of 40 now, I'm aware that time is running out, but plan on trying naturally until the menopause strikes! Am considering going back to docs for check up, but to be honest given that I had all the tests the last time and was deemed ' unexplained' I'm loathe to go through it all again to get the same diagnosis.

So for now, its just regular nookie and hoping for the best, whilst trying to stop myself totally obsessing about #2, and still feeling eternally grateful that I do have #1 to keep my occupied.

that's about it (sorry if that was too long) it's odd, but it's actually really nice to have written all this down. I always feel that ttc is such a private thing, it's not something I discuss with folk other than my husband (fear of pity? being deemed a failure?) so it's nice to be able to share the stuff I normally keep locked away.

Thanks for listening!!

Care ? i loved your wiggle dance in the shower. I did wack on some LadyG this morning and danced in the kitchen. You?re right it is impossible to feel sad! Also, do you do a lot of mountain biking? The south downs way is great for that [wondering whether it was you who nearly knocked me down up there last weekend ! ] And what ?erbs have you been ordering? Have you self-prescribed or have you been told what to get?

Gin ? sorry about AF but glad you are feeling better now. I?m glad Mr Grey is keeping you company during this time though. You really have to read them all!

Heart ? thanks for the heads up about how much time I should take off. I am booking 2 days holiday and then if I?m not up to going back, I will ring up ill. Considering i have had 1 day off in 3 years, I think that should be fine.

Princess ? i have missed something...who did you see last night, some brain re-programming person?? Have fun in the forest. Oh and fingers cross for you. Sounds very promising!

Lemon ? hope you are doing well. Can i ask when you could have sex again after the lap? Just working out dates and wondering whether i can squeeze swi in before ovulation the month of the op....because i?m sure i will be terribly fertile don?t ya know [sigh]

Artemis ? i?m really sorry about the UTI. What an absolute bugger. They?re incredibly painful and i?m not sure how they come about. Look after yourself.

Rumisyum ? welcome and i love your name. Shagging for Britain for 2 years is very much like us (isn?t it boring?) . Tell us more about your woo. And how are you doing emotionally?

MrsM ? oh it does sound like it does take some days to recover. Thanks for the explanation of what they did. How long were you under for? Anyway look after yourself. Sorry about the pains

Sarlat ? hope you?re ok and hoping that red stuff didn?t materialise to anything. i think i?m going to try this maya fertility massage out...i?m up for a bit more woo!

Well nothing to report from me. I?m going to start anti-b?s in a month so i finish them just before my op so in theory i don?t have to miss 2 months of swi. I plan to book my first ivf appointment 3 weeks after my op as i think they do a monitoring cycle and ideally want to start ivf before xmas.
I am finding this very difficult to comprehend that this is happening ....but I know we had this conversation earlier in the week.

Sorry x post with eletheo . Welcome and what a story. Sorry for your losses on the way. Conceiving naturally after a failed ivf is a very hopeful story to many of us. But i?m sorry you have be ttc dc2 now for so long. What does ?cauterising your cervix ? mean and did you have this done when you conceived your son? It seems so unfair that it took you so long to conceive the first time round and now you are 20months in for the 2nd time. This is a great place to get support though and hope that elusive bfp comes your way very soon.

Waves to joy

Welcome to you Eletheomel I'm almost 40 too (well in two days!) and trying the 'natural' way, never worked before and no reason found, but I can't rid myself of that little bit of hope. Also the mum to a nearly 3 year old (adopted). Hears to hoping, right?