TTC after a miscarriage - springy BFPs for festive beanies

[mygirllolipop]

Here's hoping for a shney new spring thread with lots of spring BFPs and some festive beanies so here's some sticky dust...
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(((_)))
Love and luck to all who need it, x

Riley - sorry to hear that.

Rubles - happy belated birthday. Hope you had a good day.

Ruthlouise - Shame about the bike. Saturday would have been a great day for cycling. I do flowers (well shrubs). I hate weeding - have weed fabric everywhere! Don't like weeding!

Nikki - How are you coping. Are you ok?

Hope everyone else is ok

Hi,
Can I join you. I had bleeding last sunday night and had a scan and a ERPC on the Monday, at 10 weeks. I think I actually miscarried at 8 weeks, as I had some discharge then. Planning to ttc ASAP, (although having what I hope is AF at present).
I think I'm coping ok, until somebody gives me sympathy then I get upset! Fortunately we didn't tell DD (aged 4) that I was pregnant, so I don't have to explain to her. (She's desperate for a brother or sister!)

mumtolaura - so very sorry to hear of your loss, please give yourself time to grieve, it is all so recent for you. if you feel the need to cry, then just let your emotions out. I lost my baby at 9 weeks and although i hadn't know i was pregnant for long i had got very attached to the baby asi'm sure you did.
I didn't have an erpc so don't know how soon you would get your period, but hopefully this is it, and you can let your body get back to normal and try again really soon.
Your time will come, it took 6 months for me to conceive again and i am now 30 wks pg so there is hope out there. stay positive and look after yourself.

Hi, Just wanted to say that I miscarried in January, after 2 years of trying. Although I think I coped with it well initially, now it catches me off guard, sometimes on a bad day it just takes something small to trigger is off - weird but I think I'm still dealing with the loss. Just wanted to send big hugs to everyone as I know how painful it is. xxx

Afternoon,

Ruthlouise - no didn't get to walk but went for coffee with a friend which was lovely until we got drenched getting to the car with the rain Hope the funeral goes as well as can be and enjoy your rest away. x

Riley - so sorry to hear what you have gone through hun, I am not sure what to say re: af etc I personally have found that my af has turned up 4 weeks after the passing of the sac on both occasions, 4 wks being my usual cycle length.

Evenhope - sorry it was af in your case but at least you know you are getting back on track and best of luck with the ttc'g

Smole - I am ok thanks still not got around to calling counsellor but I will...eventually. How are you coping?

Mum to Laura - So sorry for your loss but you are in the right place for support we all understand. I would be surprised if you are having an af a week later could this still be the bleed from erpc and your body settling down?

Nelli30 - Sorry for your loss too, I hope you are getting the support you need and we are here if you need a chat.

If I have missed anything I apologise.

Hope despite the upset things are ok?

xx

Gosh there's been a bit of a flurry since I was last on here.

Hi Mumtolaura. I'm really sorry for your miscarriage, it is so raw and recent for you so do be prepared for things to creep up on you and emotions to take you unawares. We have all been through it/are going through it so we understand the rollercoaster of ups and downs and it's not nice.

It is really sweet your dd wants a brother or sister, but I imagine that would add an extra layer of sadness and pressure to get pregnant if it were me.

Ruthlouise where are you going after the funeral? Sounds like a good plan to me, so I hope you get your bike. If not maybe some good long walks - I love walking and talking with dp.

Thanks to all who wished me a happy birthday. It wasn't happy as it turns out. It would probably go down as one of my worst birthdays so far. AF arrived which was a crushing disappointment and this set the tone for the rest of the weekend. I felt so flat and I really didn't want to go out for the planned 'big night out', but I couldn't get out of it because other people were all involved and I would have been messing everyone around at such late notice. All I wanted was a take-away, DVD and an early night...but instead I ended up going and having a very very late night, having no fun whatsoever and having a really rough day all day Sunday.
I just feel like I want to go away to a cottage and be on my own for a few days, I feel so down and so anti-social.

Hi Rubles sorry your birthday wasn't as planned and not the exciting occasion they should be. (you may have seen my previous posts, my birthday was full of sadness rather than fun and laughter I didn't see what there was to celebrate - you are not alone) So sorry af arrived and maybe a break will do you good to get away and have some private time and space. Its still early days and your time will come I am sure. Are you doing anything regarding ttc like a isis scope or charting, ov sticks etc?

If fact thats a bloody good idea, can't afford it but perhaps my dh and I should do that too. hmmm

Thanks all for your kind comments.
Firstnikki - You may be right about AF. So difficult to tell. Other threads have reported AF four weeks or so from date of miscarriage rather than from date of erpc, and I had no bleeding for nearly a week after erpc. So I thought it might possibly be AF, also got a headache and usual AF symptoms. But this could be wishful thinking.

Rubles I think you need a holiday. I had one a month after my 2nd m/c. DH decided it should be a busy holiday not a beach one so I didn't have time to think about things. I wished I had done this after my first m/c.

Welcome mumtolaura.

mumtolaura it is difficult to tell you never can tell with our bodies. Are you able to speak with your MW or Dr to ask for advice regarding this too?

Hi to all you lovely ladies who post here

Big welcome to you, mumtolaura, hope your stay here is short (in the nicest possible way )

Smole - a woman after my own heart. I hate weeding. Our rear garden is divided into two sections. The veg plot that we love and the lawn and flower borders that we don't! Would like shrubs and weed control but wouldn't want to upset the MIL who comes to stay every month and loves little flowery things and weeding (the day she can no longer do the garden the shrubs go in!! )

Rubles - sorry to hear your b/day was such a crap time. Everyone seems to suggest its good to get away for a few days after a m/c.
Where are we going? well, our dd has lots of allergies (inc egg, dairy and soya) so we couldn't face the prospect/stress of going abroad (although we have just recently got epipens) and opted for a child friendly award winning hotel on the Isle of Wight. The toddlers facilities are excellent and dd needs some quality time with us after the last couple of months stress. dh and I will also get some quality time too (high tea for littlies and 5 course meal every night with baby listening). We hope we'll be able use the break as a stepping stone to help us move on. Not sure I'm actually looking forward to going 'cos hotel is sooo geared to young children that I know there will be lots of pregnant women and tiny babies there as well but didn't think of this when booking. Still, might meet some other nice people and good for dd to have other little ones around too.

I had thought I was doing really well but this afternoon I hugged the little cloth and kissed the teddy which is going in our sons coffin and fell to pieces .

After picking brains of ladies on 'pregnancy after m/c forum' have decided not to ttc until after 1st AF. I know risk might be small but wouldn't want any increased chance of 2nd m/c being caused by not giving myself time to heal / recover hormonally.

Good morning all, I have to make this quick-ish so I'll type really fast.

Smole, yes we have a holiday booked for next month and I am counting the days till then as it is our first holiday together since dd born.

"We" (i.e. I) have decided to not ttc this month. My reaction was far too strong when AF came in relation to how long we have tried for (1 month) so I think it was a compound reaction to the miscarriage and not conceiving this time, iyswim.

My background is that I have been extremely lucky in the past and got pregnant easily, for which I was never complacent and always very grateful. But then in those days I was much, much, more laid back and didn't expect much. This time round I wasn't laid back in the least because I have this desperation to be pregnant again by August and I can only think that this anxiety is getting in the way of ovulation. So we are taking a break this month and will give it another go in May. I feel very relieved about this decision for some reason.

Dp has suggested instead of using a 'cluster bomb' approach to conception next month rather than the 'sniper fire' approach we have used, (i.e. ov sticks/charting/temping). Fine by me, and it will be so much easier if we are away on holiday in a warm place with no TV and no night life, just cards and books to entertain ourselves at night.

Rubles I understand exactly where you are coming from, early on ttc #3 I assumed like the other two times I would just catch when I wanted.
Having had an ectopic and two apparent chemical pregnancies put me into emotional and psychological tail spin. In 2 months I have regained - have fertility clinic appt in July, so am trying in a more lighthearted way not to get tangles.
We also did the cluster bomb approach this month - it was dead on fun whether I conceive or not it was the most fun we've had for months!!!
WE're awayf ro 10 days in a few weeks too. Am hoping to come back refreshed!
Take care, rubles you have sounded really down lately poppet :(

Oh Rubles ((((hugs))))
I'm sure your decision is a wise one. I'm sure most of us have a strong desire to conceive straightaway as a way of coping with the pain of our losses. I tell myself I am being realistic and I might not fall immediately and that spring/summer is a nicer time to have a baby but I know in my heart it will be a crushing disappointment if I don't fall next month. I too set myself the unhealthy target of being pg again by August as a coping mechanism (because my friend is due same time I was) and I haven't even had one AF yet!

I find comfort from WWWs comment a few days ago:
"Nature sucks sometimes, we all know that. But it can also do wonderful things, and soon we're all going to be chatting on an ante-natal thread, I'm sure of that". Now those are wise words worth hanging onto. Thanks WWW.

hi everyone
am still on holiday so can't stay here for long but need your wisdom - my af finished last thursday (was definitely af) so I was thinking I'd be ov'ing this weekend....but this morning I started bleeding again, no warning, no symptoms, nothing. Just a relatively light, thin, dark bleed. Any ideas? I'm so pissed off if I'm not going to ov...I doubt it'd be an implantation bleed as we haven't bd'd for about 9 days. Help! Give me hope!

Sorry - haven't had a chance to read the rest of the thread, but hope you're all doing ok. It's my birthday tomorrow, dh and I are about to escape away for 3 whole child-free nights!

www, I am really sorry this has happened to confuse and stress you on your holiday. I am afraid I really don't know what it is. I have heard of ovulation bleeding on mn. I would also say that implantation bleeding could occur 9 days after conception, but if you have just had AF then that seems unlikely.

Although I don't know the answer to your question please don't let it upset your holiday and your bding plans. Look on the bright side for now, and think that it means nothing and you are going to ovulate as you expected and keep on enjoying getting down and intimate with your dh as that is the best you can do for now.

WWW - sorry, I wish I had an answer but only have a suggestion that you might post on a larger thread / forum on MN where you would be tapping into a larger collective knowledge. When I wanted to know something the other day, I posted on the pg after m/c thread and got lots of responses - those ladies have been here and got the T-shirt iyswim.
Plus bleeding doesn't necessarily mean you won't OV - some women bleed for 4 weeks or so after a m/c but still get pg so must have ovulated.
((((hug))))

www was your last af normal date wise and stuff?

WWW - it is very normal for your periods to be unlike they were before. It could take a few months fo rhtem to regulate, some peoples don't even come back straight away, so the fact that you are bleedign at all is a good sign.
Although it is annoying that you may not be able to BD this time round, it is also very important that your body is in tip top condition to house your little baby. It is obviously not quite right at the moment. I think it is a little early for an impantation bleed, these normally occur about a week after ovulation, and are more like spotting.
Enjoy your holiday and relax, enjoy the time you have away, and give your body a chance to rest, it definitly will need it.

oh my goodness, have i killed the thread where are you all???? is everyone ok?

Hi everyone,
my goodness, have never seen it so quiet on here. Hope you are all doing well.
Thought I'd post 'something' as I am not sure whether I'll have another opportunity for a bit.
Tomorrow is the funeral so my mind is elsewhere then we go going away on Sunday until the following Friday (enjoy your hot X buns ).

Sorry Diddle, nothing personal but crossed threads! Hope someone else turns up soon and keeps you company

Ruth- Thinking of you tomorrow hun, {{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Meant to say I'm a graduate of this thread incase you thought I was a stalker

Come one girlies. We desperatly need some more bfp's!!!!

Don't make me rub my bump on the screen again lol.

I'm on 2ww HK... again... aaarghhh keeping my head down off this thread as am a bit fragile about the wole thing...