A concerned other half needs advice

[paolocee]

My girlfriend, just turned 39, been TTC (see, I know some of the lingo) for 5 years.

Had one unsuccessful IVF cycle.

Yesterday she had a positive ClearBlue Conception Indicator at around 5pm. It was the day her period was due. It said conception had been 1-2 weeks ago which would have been spot on. She'd been suffering from bad cramps for the past few days. Very grumpy too (no change there, then ;)). Had odd food cravings. Higher than average temperature. Experienced apparent implantation cramps and a little spotting a week ago. All looked good. We were very excited. Very.

Then she retested again last night at 8pm. A BFN. Not to worry we thought, she'd drunk a gallon of water - the HCG must've been diluted.

We'll leave it until morning and a FMU (is that right? I may be straying from my comfort zone now). Another BFN. Utter gloom. Total and utter gloom.

She's on the sofa now watching a week's worth of Corrie. She still hasn't come on, although, as she's felt for the last few days she feels like she's about to.

My guess is that it was a chemical pregnancy. But is there still hope? Any words of wisdom much appreciated. I feel so helpless.

Didnt want to read and run. I was always told a positive is just that, however not sure how that fits in with the IVF process. Hope for good news for you.

Also if retesting go for non digi, and one with a red dye

Why bit a digi test BB ? And why one with red dye?

Just curious as had a BFN myself this week but not convinced....

*not

Was this after an assisted cycle using a trigger shot or IVF? Because if so, the drugs could turn a pregnancy test positive if they were not fully out of her system. If not, it could be a chem preg (or you just need to retest). Good luck.

Additional info - it was not an IVF cycle. Just a regular one. No IVF drugs since January.

MN wisdom that I've gleamed (anecdotal) basically blue dye leeches and leaks, red meant to be more reliable, and digi not as sensitive as they make out, instances of ladies taking them apart and seeing a positive strip having read neg

I've always found 1st response (non-digital) to be the best - using FMU. And good luck - you sound like you've been through a lot x

If non IVF id say it seems positive, test again

I don't know the science behind it, but I think the chemical pregnancy thing is more common in ivf than in natural conception. I agree with the other posters that digital tests are less sensitive, so there is still hope - maybe try a First Response test first thing in the morning tomorrow? Best of luck

Thanks so much for your feedback. The positive result yesterday was the first chink of light we've had during the whole 5 years of TTC so to have it extinguished after just 3 hours seemed very cruel.

We're out in the middle of nowhere in Sweden at the moment so our choice of HPTs are limited to Clearblue which, anyway, won't be available on a Sunday. So we'll have to wait until Monday in any case. Thanks again.

i think its fairly rare to get a false positive, but common to get a false negative, i have got a false negative, but never a false positive, it could just be that its very early and some tests arent as sensitive as others, so i would leave it a few days and then test again, fingers crossed for you.

also i always felt crampy and pre-menstrual in early pregnancy, made me paranoid i was going to miscarry, but its very common, so doesnt necessarily mean she is about to get her period.

everything crossed for you xx

Thanks 5MadThings - much appreciated.

So, it's been another night of multiple visits to the toilet (her, not me), and still no sign of AF (I've definitely got the hang of this acronym lark).

Are you able to order from Amazon to you there? They sell cheap, red dye tests. I paid just over £2 for 15 tests and free delivery. They do work as I got a +ve 1 day after AF was due and DD is now 6 weeks old :)

The most sensitive tests (10 miu) are actually the cheapest ones that you can buy online (plus Superdrug own brand, unless they've changed). None of the expensive digital/first response etc branded ones are actually as sensitive as that despite what they imply (they are usually 25 or 30 miu). All tests will say somewhere in the paperwork what their sensitivity is but it's often in very small print.

You can't really get a false positive so I think you can take it that your DP (another one for you!) did conceive. If the tests continue negative for the next few days you probably have caught a chemical pregnancy/very early loss. But actually if you've had no luck at all for five years that's quite a big deal - there's a big difference as I understand between couples who really can't conceive, and couples who can conceive but have problems after that stage. A positive test means not only that you conceived but also that the process of implantation began (as that's what produces the hormone, not conception itself). They are also very very common - not in itself a sign of anything wrong. So I would try to view it positively even if this conception hasn't worked out.

If she's not spotting and her temp is still high (has she been temping every day?) that's a good sign, especially if she is now beyond her usual luteal phase length. Good luck! You sound really supportive.

I don't have much more to add to what's been said. You sound like a very supportive partner. Like everyone else has said, all she can do is retest. My heart goes out to you both. I had a 'false positive'and it was utterly crushing. be kind to yourselves x

I'd add that high temp is a good sign. Mine plummets about 24-36 hrs before AF arrives. Can I suggest something frustrating but cheap?... Wait several days before testing. Hcg doubles every 24ish hours early on, so waiting a few days reduces the chances of a false negative.

Temp is still high. Oh sh*t, here comes that damned hope again.
Thanks again to you all (is there an acronym for that?).

It could be a chemical pregnancy or just very early days. I really hope that it is the latter.

Stay positive and if you are testing again tomorrow, so 48h after the BFP you really should get your answer.

Good luck

yes temp is good, fingers crossed xxx

I agree with the poster who said a false positive is very rare- I don't see how one can get a false positive actually, unless the test itself is faulty, as it tests for a specific pregnancy hormone. However someone with more medical knowledge than me might be able to be clearer on that.
If your OH is pregnant then the levels should increase day on day, so wait (very hard I know!) and test again with the first urine of the day tomorrow if you can. Really wishing you a positive positive! (oh, and I've had two babies in my forties, so don't lose hope).

I got very crampy and had sore breasts before I found out I was pregnant. I honestly thought my AF had arrived. I didn't test positive until 4 days after AF was due, so don't lose hope.

I hope the re-test goes okay tomorrow, and is a BFP. You both deserve it by the sounds of it. You sound like a wonderful, caring partner to your DP, so good luck.

I'd be surprised if it was a chemical pregnancy with tests that close together. More likely to just be different test sensitivities. I know how you are feeling as we tried for over four years (had one miscarriage early on) and this sort of thing is awful. We now have a one-year old. I felt like I was about to start my period both times I got pregnant. Good luck with the next test.

MainlyMaynie, I thought that about the tests on Friday too- they seemed too close to be conclusive. But it was the BFN yesterday morning that knocked us for six. That's the one I can't explain away. Still, she's just been for her sixth wee of the morning....