TTC for 10+ months, part 8

[eurochick]

A friendly, supportive thread for those taking a blooming long time to conceive!

ha Princess I was just about to say the same to Joycep ! Many congrates ladyg .

There has been alot of writing here this morning which I'm just catching up on now as I have been out all morning on a life saving mercy mission, and for once that's not even much of an overstatement. Managed to procure 4 units of blood for someone who's been smashed up in a car accident. A friend of hers knocked on my door this morning. It involved alot of running around and a bit of shouting. What a fucked up medical system when you have to bring blood to the hospital.

Mind you, sarlet totally shocking your situation too. Ffs. Imagine the things that must be done incorrectly with people who are less well educated in these things (which I'm guessing is the majority of folks).

Pout I had to grin at your olympics comments. My professional environment and geographical location combined means that I'm pretty close to goings on in Syria. You are of course right. All sorted. I'm totally with you on routine during bad times. Waiting for your update on today.

Princess we are due to move in a year on so. I don't know where but most likely somewhere in Africa, which a part of the world in which we feel very at home by now, having spend alot of time there and where Little Doll was born. I have a strong perference for the east.

Joycep in answer to your question....I didn't think about TTC for a second I don't think, not that I remember anyway. For a year leading up we were living apart in different countries seeing each other every 6 to 8 weeks. I have no memory of any TTC timing thoughts. The full first year with Little Doll was a breeze but with a whole new tiny person our lives I didn't give it a thought then either.

Thanks to all for the kind support on shag week with house guests. You do realise I'm complaining about a cycle before even finished the one I'm on now? This is the kind of shit I hate about TTC. Looking ahead and translating life into cycle days its just bollocks. I agree that guests can put up with things that go bonk in the night. Still, I think the bonks might be me hitting Mr Doll over the head after he pretends not to be put off then after 20 minutes of action deciding that he might not be getting there after all...

Have to run. Waves to all I missed and here ladyg have some more

Thank you ladies! It doesn?t feel real at all and I can?t get my head round it.

Quick recap on my situation: it?s our 21st cycle (20th month) of trying. I have one blocked tube and one ?sluggish? tube and mr gee?s sperm is pretty rubbish on all counts - worst at the last check in April this year. We had ICSI in February, we got decent fertilisation and had one 3 day embryo put back but it wasn?t successful.

The only thing that?s changed since then is the mix of supplements ? in April I changed mr gee?s multi-vits for pregnacare and made him take extra vitamin C and zinc. I changed to pregnacare then too and added omega 3, vitamin D, B6 and baby aspirin into the mix. But I?m not sure that can have made that much of a difference when there are some pretty specific physical reasons we haven?t been able to get pregnant in the past.

Every month I have spotting for almost a week before my period, this month was no different but it stopped the day before it should have turned into full flow. I also have a max 10 day luteal phase, looking back at my notes on futility friend I had crampy feelings at 6DPO, which I guess must have been the beginnings of something happening.

No magic recipe to report on ? and, no, it certainly wasn?t a case of relaxing! In fact, because of we were due to start IVF/ICSI again in August I was freaking out that we weren?t ready (health/exercise/emotionally wise). We only managed SWI 2 or 3 times last month ? at snatched intervals when our house guest was out! So house guests might not be a bad thing doll!

I have everything crossed that this is the start of a run of good luck for this lovely thread

yeh! everyone get shag week house guests! It works, it's proven. Case closed. On Vits ladyg , a popped a 'Wellman' vit yesterday and I'm pinning my hopes on it, if only because I want to post that 'the only thing I did different this month was take Wellman vits....'

p.s. joycep - how strange that you were thinking that this morning... a sixth sense indeed! As I've said above, there was definitely no 'relax and it happened'. Though there have been other things going on which have prevented me getting on mumsnet regularly, ttc has always been top of my mind

Ladygee . Congratulations. And thank fuck the finger turned up again!!

Interestingly I had decided to change to pregnacare the other day. My reasoning? My fertile, upduffed on month 1 SiL uses it. I've also started baby aspirin, and have IVF clinic booked. Sure sign I'll get a BFP too, no?

Sticky thoughts for you.

at life saving blood run doll. And boo hiss to the Olympic haters. Of course the world still has problems. But for once I'm enjoying happy positive uplifting news. .

Oh. Back in the day when I was on a Shagging for Fun thread, one of the ladies got her BFP shagging on the floor as the bed was too creaky when they had houseguests.

rabbit and lemon special hugs to you. You both sound like you need them.

Well, life really is a miracle... ladygee you've given me so much renewed faith this morning :) I just hope that my 21st cycle of actual active trying (without the year out for wedding and time off for brown diet or unableness because of strange bleeding) i.e. this one (in 3 year and 2 months) is just as lucky, somehow I doubt it, I have a feeling in my waters (as my nan would say) that we will somehow get there later this year. I have a hunch that i will have an autumn BFP. I don't know why, I just do! We will be sad to see you go over to the grads board but do keep us informed on how it's all going :)

Doll Holy crap, I hadn't considered how close you are to Syria. Geography is appalling... It must be terrifying! And medals for you (not in the sarky way) for helping with the accident and blood stuff this morning. You always bring me back to how privileged and spoilt we are here in the UK taking everything for granted. Bumpty-bump back down to earth.

Euro well done for early morning run. Hats off to you I still like to think of you with your gun and googles and mean look, I think you should take that stance to the clinic later this week. They don't stand a chance against your cross examination! And it's amazing how they can change their minds on things. DH had a recurring problem with his wisdom tooth and when they tried to take it out, his dentist failed and had to saw a bit of his jaw bone off (I kid you not - his face was huge afterwards and he had marks on his chest where they had tried to lever it out - he was under local anesthetic and they were at him for 45 minutes) and didn't tell him until an appointment a year later.... the tooth came through but continued to be problematic. Then they suggested taking it out again. He told them that he could see how close the tooth was to his nerve and that he is a professional musician (he was teaching at the time and has always dreamt of returning to a professional career as a musician in the future) and that any nerve damage would ruin his career as a saxophonist. They told him that the risk of permanent nerve damage was 1 in 100 and that they would ensure their top person would take his tooth out as and I quote "junior dentists or trainees usually do this procedure". However, the consultant had a look at the troublesome tooth and said, in this case, I think it's best if we leave it and reconsider only if you have a serious infection. Needless to say that was 3 years ago and there has only been one minor problem since. Sometimes I think they should just leave smaller niggles alone and provide suggestions for management? Anyway, sorry that you are feeling anxious and battling your doctor and hoping that those twinges single your cycle back to normal.

. Why is it so bloody hard? Just called NHS hospital to get results of dildo-cam and HSG transferred to private clinic. I have to write in and request it. Ok fine I'll do that today. Except apparently I need Mr Nelly's signature too. Which means I need to get it tonight. I'll forget. And my appointment is in a week so I'll never get it in time. Meh.

Just quickly popping on ladyg that is fantastic news, congrats and hoping it is a sticky bean will be back later

Nelly write in? Get signature? What is this 1975?

Nelly why do they need Mr Nelly's signature if they are your results? Are you able to request that they are sent to you and then you can email them on to the clinic? That seems utterly ridiculous! Do you know, I would call back and make a fuss - that sounds like utter bollocks. I could understand if they were Mr N's results but dildo cam clearly doesn't go up anywhere near Mr N!!

doll - I totally missed your post about saving a life and sorting out blood this morning. As princess says, very humbling and puts things in perspective here. I've only been on holiday there but I love east Africa, I hope you get to move to where you want to be.

nelly - there is no end to the crappiness and lack of clarity around the NHS systems sometimes.

princess - a feeling in your waters can only be a good thing and I sincerely hope it turns out to be true. I don't feel quite ready to move anywhere else yet, I have to have an early scan to check everything's as it should be so will be here lurking at least 'til then if that's ok?

I have no idea why they need his signature. I swear they make this up as they go along. So I have a made-up idea of my own. Which I won't commit to t'internet just in case. But I'm using a different coloured pen .

Stay ladygee and let your luck rub off on us please .

princess is your water like critters Arkansas water? Or wherever her crazy relative recommended. Share some of that too please!

nelly different coloured pens are useful things

Hi ladies

Hope you don't mind me popping in. I just wanted to pass huge congrats on to ladygee. I'm absolutely delighted for you

I'm hoping that the big fat lazy finger is going to start getting its ass into gear now!

ladygee I felt actually quite emotional when I read your news, how amazing!!!! if only I could have said to you over our meal three weeks ago that you were literally days away from being pregnant -maybe you were pregnant! It is a real lift to know that it can happen naturally, even after 21 cycles and being told the chances are small, even after an ivf that didn't work, even with reluctant sperms, 'sluggish' tubes and spotting. It happens. My consultant is famed for often saying he sees babies appear every day when it seemed unlikey, as if from nowhere. I imagine it feels all sorts of things now and I wish you a non eventful, sick free and one push tickle birth. You are pregnant, woo hoo! Please please do stay here, keep us company and let us know how you're getting on. I miss people whe theyre gone.

lemon hand hold. You are being so brave. As a rabbit currently feeling on the brink of losing my marbles you have my full sympathy. Starting a new job is stressful enough as it is without all this egg and sperm malarkey. You can do it.

euro you have hit the nail on the head, I can't cope with anyone poking me or touching me or dildocamming me, or suggesting interventions that are likely to make me feel rubbish. I feel rubbish enough as it is. I have always been a worrier. I get more stressed than the usual human over things like driving tests/interviews/dates(!) etc but I've never had what I'd class as proper anxiety problems until this past year. I can pinpoint the week it started which was when I was booking my HSG, I was scared of it as both a painful process and as potentially revealing blocked tubes. Since then, every hospital appointment has revealed new layers of crap to deal with and a stupid amount of messing with my body. I can do no more for now and I'm hoping if I shut out the intervention side of things I might be able to shift the nerves. Your cervical issues are very similar really, an added diversion and obstacle that involve ladyparts but not directly related to fertility - it is hard. Well done on the run!

doll good grief about the blood very humbling.

buzzy I had a squirrel come into my 4th floor flat once through the balcony and he and the rabbit had a very strange staring each other out stand off. It was surreal and I didn't know what to do!luckily the squirrel backed down and ran away back out the balcony. That is a true story

missm I've never heard about the one main egg thing before. Here's the thing, after my big op the cons sat with me and said ivf was next up as I already ov on my own. Two months later he's all up for clomid, sayingitjust work for some women that ovulate and they don't entirely know why. This is from the same expert man. It's a minefield. That said, mn is full of women who ovulate but clomid did it for them. It's tempting just to see if it does the trick. If Pout announces triplets in the next few weeks I will swallow my clomid like a good girl. Or see if she wants to give one away

Speaking of which, how did it go pout could you still see pouty trio?

joycep that's so insensitive of your bro. We all know that and don't need telling! A good thing about our ttc is how sensitive we will be about such things.

princess yay to flat selling! It will feel like such a weight off your mind.

I did yoga with my usual woman today and I did it! I couldn't do all of the poses but did most. Knackered now

Happy 10 plus day, please loiter finger please please.

nelly your husbands signature - what!????!

Alright now I've had time to catch up with what you ladies are up to.

First of all ladygee that is wonderful, wonderful news! I'm so happy for you, that has picked me up on an otherwise miserable day. Congratulations and best of luck to you.

Gin I hate those pregnancy dreams, they're so nice while you're having them and you feel so empty when you wake up. I once had one where I gave birth to the contents of my purse (keys, mobile, lipsticks etc.) - that was a weird one. fx for the lottery and have a lovely, romantic time in the south of France.

doll regarding houseguest interrupting shag fest - can you think of it as a fun "get away from the everyday" to add a little excitement to your shagfest? What I mean is the fact that someone is under the same roof means you have to be extra quiet and it's a little naughty, taking you back to when you were younger and desperate not to get caught? Depends on the couple of course but I notice things like that always adds a bit of excitement for us (which is sadly lacking when TTC).

What an exciting morning you've had! I also love East Africa. We had our honeymoon in Tanzania and fell in love. I want to go back badly (broken backs aside)

lemon I'm addicted to the swimming and tennis as well. DH and I almost had a row over the Japanese men taking the Silver in the gymnastics. Wasn't that South African swimmer
last night sweet? I was so happy for him.

Nelly I love the idea of a birthday baby. You deserve it!

sarlat I think you're right. In some ways with all our mentalling and googling we sometimes know more than the experts seem to. We also spend our entire time thinking about our own issues rather than just looking at generalities like doctors will. Sometimes we may well be way off base but we know our bodies too and we should be heard. Definitely agree to question everything.

buzzy Doctor said yesterday that unless there are some genetic abnormalities, his lazy sperm likely has more to do with his mother smoking during pregnancy than any one other thing he's done. Wonder how your MIL would like to hear that especially if she smoked during her pregnancy? Not sure how much truth there is in it but that's what she told us.

I'm totally on board with the natural IUI. I've thought it through extensively and I have no issue ethically, morally, psychologically, physically etc. with taking that step. I'm happy to jump in and it looks like we will start next cycle. The issues start arising when we have to start thinking about what the next step is after that. euro mild or natural IVF would likely be the most comfortable next step as well.

MrM is of the opinion that there's no sense in thinking about it all until we actually have to but I don't work that way. I'm pretty sure that the ICSI she is pushing is without hormones. I will double check but she talked about the futility of having more than one egg so she seems to believe it to be unnecessary to SO. She wasn't particularly happy with MrM taking Tamoxifen either, saying she doesn't see the point but DH will continue to take it for the 3 months and see what it does as it doesn't seem to doing him any harm. In fact, after only a week on it his testosterone levels increased from 740 to 951. That said, 740 is on the high end of normal anyway so he hardly needs to increase his testosterone but thought I'd mention in incase someone here does think they'd benefit from increased testosterone.

joyce I always thought that ICSI was only for people with severe sperm problems which isn't really the case with MrM. Yes, motility is an issue but he's got a good count and I didn't think it was so bad which is why I was so surprised that the doctor wanted to skip IVF.

I'm sad and worried today as our little girl cat went missing yesterday. Hoping very much she comes home soon. Our boy cat is worried sick and won't eat. He even comes out with us when we go looking for her, like a dog he walks right along beside me and looks under bushes and meows for her.

Ladygee of course I don't want you to go anywhere, it's just that previous grads seem to disappear. Stick around as long as you want! sheepishly I was just trying to be polite rather than shoo you away

Nelly I think that's called thinking outside the box. I don't think my water is like Akansas water. I think it's more wishful-thinking-but-ultimately-useless-feeling-in-my-water.

Kitty Nice to see you round these parts! How are you getting on?

Rabbit love your rabbit v squirrel story. Did you get a pic?! Good work on the yoga. You'll be back to head stands and levitating before you know it! Remember, life is an inward journey. Om Shanti.

MissM your cat story is heartbreaking. Hope she comes back soon xx

Oh missM I hope she comes home. I feel your pain. Last year I had to have my horse put to sleep. The next day I went off to France for a few days and Mr Nelly went away too. He got back on the Monday and our cat was missing (mum was house sitting). She never leaves home, we have a big garden and it's far enough for her. Mr N spent all day searching. I was inconsolable having already lost one pet 4 days earlier. Then at 3 am, having spent all night looking till it got dark, I heard a "chewing" noise which I recognised as her cleaning her long hair. And there she was in the bedroom, quite non-plussed, wondering why we both threw ourselves at her.

So pointless story really, except to say she was fine even though we don't know where on earth she was and it was so out of character. Fingers crossed yours will be too. Locked sheds and garages in neighbours houses are prime culprits (I'm sure you know this already). Keep shouting on her and fingers crossed she will saunter in soon .

The different coloured pen has been used . And in other news I have decent EWCM this month.

I'm worried about you rabbit. Huge hugs. But your squirrel v rabbit made me LOL .

Ok, I feel sick. The Greek's want to exchange on Friday. We will complete either just before or just after holiday. Our house is inhabitable. We are going to be homeless i.e. at the PIL and I don't know where all our stuff is going to go. Bluergh.

well done on the EWCM nelly, I had some too, though I had to go looking for it if you catch my drift. Must have been all those sarlet carrots. I'm the primary cook at home these days, so the boys eat what I cook for us all, even Little Doll exclaimed 'more carrots, Mama?!' I didn't get to the bottom how carrots, baby or otherwise, could be responsible for the pant snot situation despite plenty of research. Let's put it in buzzy's Dr's "can't hurt" bucket.

x-post princess , very difficult one. PIL the only option?

Friday princess?! Gawd, how comes so fast? Not sure if this helpful or not but I lived in our inhabitable house for months (often having to use the pub toilet ) and have loads of top tips i could share for living in rubble - is it totally impossible? I thought of it as bad dusty camping. But was prone to rages on a daily basis.

nelly thank you. I'll be ok, just wish my brain and body would man up.

missm hurry home cat. My friends went missing recently and was in a neighbours shed unscathed.

Rabbit Because we played hard ball, had another offer, everything was ready to go except for them pulling out due to valuation. We argued that the valuation report was very flawed and Dad sat out until they came back up to asking price. Which they did - today. It's just that they now want us out! Eeek! I'm pushing to get gas supply, hot water and electrics in the next week so we can move in and do dusty camping. I don't mind dusty camping at all, providing there is hot water and somewhere to sleep. I think we'll use PIL as storage? It's a bit like Challenge Anneka (bigger bum and not as flat belly and raging PMS) and with team (DH) moving like an infuriating snail.

Doll the only other place would be my bessie's spare room and I can't deal with her being so pregnant right now. Plus I need to be able to work from home and I don't think there would be enough room.

I feel a bit better now (just a little blurgh) xxx