Rainbow Babies - hoping and trying for rainbows, loving and remembering our Angels xxx

[Ellypoo]

Hoping this thread brings us all luck and hope xxx

wtw its such a horrible coincidence for you.

You will get to hear the newborn screaming, Wtw, you will! Have you had any more ctgs done? Poor little K. Hope she's ok.

Think this is my first ever ((hug)) for WTW. I can't imagine how stressed you must be. Offering a virtual hand as well.

Thank you too and mecha. Poor little K she came back in this afternoon with a card she had made me and fussed around getting me tissues and straightening the bed. She's insisting on coming back in tonight as well. She's very unsettled by it. Just been told i've ++++ ketones in my urine by the midwife so waiting for doctor to come and review. Have had 4 x 1000ml fluid bags but am still showing as dehydrated They want me to go to the day assessment unit for a ctg as they use a whizzy computer to confirm everything's fine as well as the print out. Downside is they've been too busy all day so haven't had one since 6am! Not ideal at all but she is kicking - will just be good to have proper confirmation she is still unaffected. Bloomin hot in here too!

Thank you for all the hand holding - haven't told many people in RL that I'm in so it's good to get it down here xx

Squeezing hand tighter. wtw. Bless your K! She's such a great big sister.

wtw bless little K, she's such a good big sister! I can imagine she must be feeling very worried about you and baby! Will be praying that everyone will go ok with you and baby! x

I realised earlier that it's been a year today we've had Sterre's funeral. No wonder she's sending us pennies to tell us that she misses us! Miss you too little one, love you forever! x

It was really lovely meeting with the lady vicar today, I felt so understood and she really listened to my story.

blue that's good to hear.

wtw this maybe unrelated but I had a friend last year had her baby a week before I had Fi, she had her my EMCS as she had a nosebleed that wouldn't stop. What I'm trying to say badly is, you are in the best place, and they will look after you. I hope your getting your ctg.

Offering my hand for you to hold Wtw, ((hugs)) for you x

Ah my little nurse has been back in she does cheer me up She 'helped' the midwife take my blood pressure and temp so she was feeling very chuffed.

Had ctg and thank goodness she is still totally fine. She met the computers 'criteria' in 14 minutes which is reassuring.

Off for a shower now - simple pleasures

Bless Sterre leaving you pennies blue glad you had a good chat xx

wtw Im glad, thats must be a weight off your shoulders for now. How are you feeling?

wtw I have no idea what to say, all sounds such a horrible coincidence and must be so scary. Glad to hear lots of kicking and ctg is going well. Hope you start to feel better soon, everyone is very right you are in the best place possible here's another hand to add to the pile in here xx

Blitzy Good for you, hope Batman was a good film and the getting drunk being an arse was worth it for your Dh. Honestly sometimes people just don't think beyond the end of their nose but it's not on when it's your other half

Hi to everyone else, I'm struggling more with reading and writing at the moment is the truth, I'm not even managing all the Guardian and I've been reading that since I was 15. Baby brain mixed with dyslexia does seem to make this very difficult so I'm sorry I keep missing things and not posting regulaly but you are always in my thoughts even if I'm missing from the board

Still pretty rotten - just very very achy in all my muscles and so dehydrated but just cannot keep anything down even with the anti emetics. Just waiting for doctor to come round and tell me what they're thinking. Tis very very busy here.

I think a couple have just been taken into the nightingale room (bereavement suite at this hospital where we were with Erin - were you in there with Ophelia fan?) I can hear those heart wrenching howls and sobbing. Is making me quite teary to think of someone else going through the agony of losing a child

ooh wtw how heartbreaking! :( will be thinking of them!
Our bereavement suite was called the Willow Suite...

Glad your little nurse was able to examine you! Hang in there x

wtw I don't know what the suite was called, but it was at the end of the ward behind the front desk. Poor you not what you want to hear.

wtw ((hugs))

Whatever you re in the right place where they can take good care of you both... Look on the flip side: at least you re been taken care off xxxxx 1 day at a time .... I step at a time. The weekend before I had Phebs I was on the same post natal ward I went back in to after I' d had her & I remember hearing all the babies crying, seeing them & I returned 3 days later with my chunky monkey & u will too....take it easy .... Xxxx rest xxxxxx
Blue pennies from heaven : that's lovely. Bless Sterre xxxxx
Hi all: still full of cold etc here ... Thought we had some good news the MIL from hell is in hospital & firstly , via the grapevine, heard she was " desperatly I'll" on her last legs however Ant visited last night & found out its only gallstones...,, for those of u who think I m being awful ; there's a long history of her being a total cow to me, ant , Georgie thus she's only seen Phebs once in her life.....
If there was any god he'd have taken her ( who doesn t live just exsists ) & left my Georgie.
Lost 4 lb last night whoop whoop so being I'll has an upside I m now 2.5 lbs off 2 stones...,,so proud of myself as I wanted 2 stones off by end of Sept but might be able to have 2.5-3 stones off by then...
Love to all: enjoy the sun cxx

I just wanted to come on to send love to whatevertheweather this morning and am now sitting here in tears for the poor couple in the bereavement suite... I remember those hours so well. I am SO sorry wtw that you had to hear that as well as everything else, oh this is just terrible for you. I hope you managed to get at least a little bit of peaceful sleep and that your little one is still giving her mummy a very regular kicking to tell you that all is well.
Your little K sounds adorable.
I also wanted to empathise a bit with you re feeling terrible/throwing up - I had hyperemesis during my pregnancy so I know what it's like, so so horrid esp when you are 30 weeks +. A new internet friend is thinking of you today xxx

Mecha I know what you mean about those dreams being both wonderful and awful simultaneously. Today I woke up at 4.30, evidently my body's way of trying to avoid having another dream, but then I sort of wished I would have another one.

I have a 'lovely' morning planned with my six-week postnatal GP appointment then a visit from a heavily pg friend (four, yes count 'em, four of my close friends have a baby on the way shortly). But I will be thinking of wtw all day. x

Thank you guys. You are very lovely. Though please don't feel sorry for me hearing that poor couple I was just desperately sad for them. Feeling a little brighter this morning and desperately hoping they will let me go home today as I will finish the iv antibiotics this afternoon and can finish the course with tablets. They have said it depends on my urine and blood tests showing I am hydrated enough to come off the iv fluids. Am hoping so as I've now managed to keep about a cup of water down without being sick so that's progress and i've now had a bag of fluids with potassium and glucose in so that should help. Might try a slice of toast this morning. Still terribly achy in my muscles but think just being at home in my own bed will help that. Baby is kicking around like a good 'un this morning, midwife coming to listen to her with a handheld Doppler soon

Kleine sounds like you've a tough day ahead. Just remember it is okay to put yourself first at the moment. If you don't feel up to seeing pg friends and babies then don't. They should understand.

Angel sorry to hear you're all full of cold still. Rubbish!

How are things with dh Blizy?

Has anyone heard from august? saw on her Fb that nothing was happening early hours of Monday morning.

Love to all - thanks for keeping me sane! xx

kleine I was in the sam situation as you re: friends, one had just had a baby and 2 were heavily pregnant. It was/is hard visiting them. I hope you day is ok.

wtw I have everything crossed that you get out of hospital today. How sad and horrible for the couple in the bereavment suite.

angel Hope you feel better soon. x

I had a massive talk with dh last night. I found it very hard to tell him how I am feeling, he thinks I am a bit depressed (I think I agree) I am going to the doctors with a view of asking for councelling .

Oh crap my wee is the colour of dark honey. That's not good!

Thanks wtw and blizy. I have told my pg friends that I'd like to see them, individually and without their other kids, before they pop, as I don't think I'll be able to bear it while they have a newborn. But I want to show them our photos of E and tell them all about her, otherwise I'll have missed the chance to talk with them in detail about my gorgeous girl. They are all lovely, and all know that I might slam the door in their faces if I just can't do it... I've managed one already though
(The friend who had a little girl three weeks before E was born has, though, been informed that we won't be seeing them for a LONG long time. Argh.)

Really glad you're feeling a bit better wtw and hope you get to go home.

Blizy so sorry you're feeling so low. I agree that the idea of counselling is scary. We are going to try it sometime soon, as I think that DH will need it before/during TTC (and doubtless I will too). Will you go to the docs soon?

Angel hope you feel better soon too, this isn't the weather for a cold!

I meant to say Blue I love the idea of pennies from Sterre. Is Sterre a Belgian name btw?

Right, off I toddle to start my day x

Sorry Blizy cross posted. Counselling might be a good idea - you've been through so much it's not wonder you feel down xx

klein baby steps my friend. x

wtw Oh crap about your urine!

I have to wait until Wednesday to phone for an appointment, they only accept apps one week in advance!

angel well done on the weight loss! I've stalled mine after the miscarriage but back on it this week.

wtw so glad you are feeling better, but that wee sample sounds horrid. Hope you get some answers today or at least a chance to go home.

blizy maybe give counselling ago and see how you feel.

poppet take it easy today, its very brave of you to see your friends.

Talk soon just off into work.

Wtw, doesn't sound good, your wee being honey-coloured! Have you managed to keep down any more water? You're reminding me of my experience in labour with Thea - my wee had ketones in it and despite being on a drip my catheter bag had hardly anything in it. The doctor was worried that my kidneys were going to shut down, so they moved me into their operating delivery room (room that could be used as an operating theatre if the need arose) just in case. Once Thea was delivered, though, it all went back to normal very quickly. That was one reason why they were querying pre-eclampsia, although the consultant (who wasn't even there!) said later that there wasn't enough evidence to diagnose that. She said dehydration in labour was normal - all we could say was that if that was the case, why was the on-call doctor worried enough to move me into the special room? I'm so pleased to hear that the ctg went well and LO is kicking away. Has anyone mentioned the possibility of early delivery? If so, don't worry - 35 weeks is so nearly there! I was a 35 week baby (EMCS because of cord prolapse) and both me and my twin were absolutely fine. We spent a little time in special care because we were very small, (4lb and 4lb 12), but your LO will already be bigger than that. Also, think of Cheese's Ella - she was born at 34 weeks, wasn't she, and she got home pretty quickly. Thinking of you lots!

Also thinking of August - hope things are moving or have moved and she's cuddling her rainbow baby!

Blizy, good for you for being brave enough to seek help with your depression. Hope you get seen quickly. DH was told there was a year's waiting list and sent links to websites to read about CBT in the meantime, grr! Still, Mum got CBT very quickly in her area - postcode lottery! Anyway, it won't be CBT that you get, because that's not suitable for bereavement.

Angel, well done you with the weight loss! I have been doing Dr Briffa's Paleo diet and lost 11lbs in 5 weeks, yay! I've got another half-stone to go before I'm at my pre-Thea weight, and ideally I'd like to lose another stone after that, but it's a start.

Maia's been up since 6.15 after not letting me go to bed until midnight (she fell asleep at 7 and then woke up just as I was getting ready for bed at 10.45, grr!), plus a 3.30 awakening as well. I've got visitors coming tonight and need to do heaps of cleaning up, so no napping for me. Gaaah!