Fantastic 40+ thread - part 6

[Curlylox]

Over here everyone

He he Knicks - got your DP's lurve hammer all lined up eh? Get ready; get set; get bonking. [Grin] 15 months is a killer; let's just make sure you put it all behind you with a sticky BFP this cycle.

Can't find who was asking about EPRC - I think it took about 6 weeks from EPRC to period for me, hope that helps. I did get pregnant 3 months after EPRC but unfortunately mc'd that one - my point being? -there may well be an extra fertile time after a mc. Good luck. X

Gum

Thanks so much everyone. I'm trying really really hard not to get excited, but bugger,I am...

I was in a cafe yesterday with my sister (whom I told,she's the only other person who knows except in the virtual world) and there was a teeeny tiny little baby in there. Boy,did we feel clucky!

I just don't want to get my hopes up,but it's impossible.

I woke up at 3am,hot and sweaty and feeling quite sick,and needing to pee. All good signs I think, though this head-cold I have has been pretty bad. I peed on another stick,and it seemed to take ages to come up with a second line,but it did and it's a little darker than yesterday.

I have had the run around from my doctor's office, who won't prescribe progesterone for me. My Dr is on holiday. She's the one who said,"call me when you get a bfp and I'll prescribe the progesterone". So I rang her office and she's away until June 5th. They said they'd get another doctor to prescribe, but that doctor couldn't find anything in my notes,so has contacted an Ob/gyn who has said there's no evidence for progesterone for helping early pregnancy, so, they won't prescribe.She aid,why don't you contact your specialist (consultant), but I don't actually have one!

I should be angry,but I'm not at all, I feel quite calm about it,and I'll continue with the cream. I have always had good levels, and I'll see my own doctor before I reach 9 weeks, which is when I was worried that progesterone might drop - and we can monitor that through blood work.
There is another doctor whom I might go and see before then, an acquaintance I know was put on progesterone by him,as she was 44 and had had two previous miscarriages. She had a baby,and is pregnant again (in Australia we can see any doctor we like).

Twirly were you asking about the ERPC and return of fertility? I'm pretty sure it took about 6 weeks for me,though I'm not sure because I was having a cycle (according to temps and opks) but not bleeding.It took a while for my lining to build up again.

Hi Gum - no, not me asking about ERPC.

So pleased about your news - the doc I spoke to recently said that she didn't believe prog had any proven effect, so, in the absence of you getting it, I'm going to believe her and then, hopefully, all will be well for you . . . she also said that it truly was all about getting that good egg. I know you're not in the UK, but her point was that, if you are willing to pay for it, there are plenty of clinics who will say they can help but there is actually nothing they can do if you're going for the natural route and have unexplained mc. I think you're younger than me (who isn't ?) so I'll keep my fingers crossed that you had a perfectly wonderful egg in there!

Was also told that there is definitely a three month fertile window after mc, and that post-42, there is absolutely no point in waiting to ttc. They said that they don't even suggest it for dating in the case of another pg, because if it works, it works; if you're going to mc, you will, and dates won't do anything. They also said that there is some evidence that if you do conceive during this window, the mc rates are lower. No pressure there then . .

Clicking - not really feeling that strong at all, but managing to put a front on as I'm sure we all do. Think am only doing OK as am concentrating on telling myself I can try again if I want to. Hadn't even cried until I started reading a thread last night about people struggling to make ends meet, then I started bawling my eyes out about how lucky I am and how I should stop feeling sorry for myself and start counting my blessings.

Diege, Tina, Knicky and all, thank you for your words, everyone is so lovely here.

I do have lots of questions and I will post them soon, so hope you can all continue with your patience as it's very much appreciated.

Special hugs for MiaAlexandra'sMum x

Twirly - I'd be surprised if you're older than me. I'm going to be 46 in November.

Still not too old. I do hope it was a decent egg this time, hoping the DHEA will have helped. I guess it remains to be seen.

FTIAPregnant. I'll try and enjoy it. Had that horrible preggo taste in my mouth all day, which is a good sign.

The days will be slow, but I'll try not to think too much.

In your shoes I would definitely be ttc again asap. I hope that extra fertile time does the trick for you.

Gum we all know you know FAR MORE than the doctors at the clinic, so go with your own knowledge and do whatever it takes to get the treatment you want at the time you want it. FTYAP!!!! yay!!!

Angel would you recommend everyone have that strep swab before birth? Am wondering if I should ask the consultant at 37 weeks to put it in my notes. I know they do it as a matter of course in the US but I'm not sure how seriously they take it here. What do you think?

Hi GUM fabulous news, hope all goes well.

Hugs to Hippy, Miaalexandersmum, Diege, lol and co, to all the newbies hi and all the VERY best and to all the oldies all the VERY best too.

Looking forward to hearing more news. Hugs.

PS all fine with me, had a bit of a 'poor' me blip but now ok. I am still excited about things and even considering going to an open evening about fostering very soon. Hugs and God bless to all.

i agree, from what i've read for women over 40 its a lot about catching the good egg . There is a massive study going on into progesterone preventing MC (or not) at the moment- the Promise study i think. It will be interesting to hear what they conclude in a few years- even if it is too late for some of us. I hope it clears this issue up once and for all.

twirly there is a piece of research that showed that women who got pregnant within 6 months of a MC were more likely to have a successful pregnancy than those who didn't. This obviously puts huge pressure on women. However as far as i know its just one study.

The thing is time is just running out, doesn't matter how you look at it, a MC in your 20s is awful but there is loads of time to try again. I got pregnant easily last year, second month of trying, MMC at 11.5 weeks, wait for ERPC, wait for AF, wait for hormones to get back in some sort of shape and we're looking at 7 months have gone past since i started trying . I'm still at square 1 , waiting to conceive and not getting any younger. Plus i'm well over 3 months from my MMC with the clock ticking on that bloody 6 month window where pregnancy is supposedly more successful. Still read an interesting interview with Hilary Mantel and she had her ovaries removed in her late 20s so compared with her I feel very fortunate. I don't want to bring everyone down but i am realisitc, there are things i can do to keep my body healthy and try to ensure the eggs mature as well as possible but a lot is inevitably down to sheer luck. All i can hope is that these past months i've not been successful is down to my body rejecting duff eggs and one day a good one will be caught and stick. Hope the same happens to everyone on here who is still TTC.

Blackcats - I don't think those points are bringing everyone down, well, they don't bring me down, because you're absolutely right. I think that it becomes so easy to get obsessed and forget that, actually, there's not much you can do. If you don't smoke, don't drink, take folic acid, have a decent diet, aren't hugely under/overweight, don't work in a toxic environment, it can be frustrating that you're actually quite powerless because the eggs have all been fixed so long ago.

I've said to my DH that he can stop this any time he wants too because I do believe that if he thinks it is affecting us negatively as a couple/family, I would be wrong to just plough on regardless. I've seen this wreck relationships and that's a price I don't want to pay. So, I will try again and I will read/do what I can, but I will also listen to the doctors who are saying that my chances are tiny, tiny, tiny and that, really, I need to prepare myself for miscarriage not a baby if I get pregnant again.

And Gum - I most definitely AM older than you!

Bit pissed off today. I have been SWI every 3 days for th last 2 weeks to ensure i covered my fertile period but alas i did not see a temp rise and now at day 21 it looks like AF is on her way. Just following on from the discussion about how we can only do so much, I am annoyed. I can ensure that the troops are in place every few days but i cannot MAKE the feckin' egg be released if it can't be arsed!! Looks like a typical 'short annovulary and approaching menopausal' type of cycle.

oh well, i'll get over it - probably just PMT'd up.

I'll keep checking in on you all. Hang in there GUM. X

Hippy xxxx
LOL certainly think it doesn t do any harm to be swabbed for Strep B at 36 weeks. Yes, it's customary in America ... There's some push for it here also however, as with everything it all boils down to money. As Strep B is asymptomatic think it's reassuring to have been swabbed. Also, very easy to treat if found. What does your consultant say? Due to what happened with Georgie it was never an issue for my consultant ( also I can swab myself & did anyhow) how many weeks are you now? Xxx
Love to all
Glad you re ok * Italian" xxx

Hippy sending you big hugs to my favourite hippy-dippy girl.

Hugs right back to my favorite lithe dog of European descent.

Thanks Angel. I'm 36 weeks - got my app with consultant on 30th so will definitely ask to be swabbed. Can only be helpful. Hope all's well xx

Gum hope you're ok and holding on in there x

Hippy not surprised you're pissed off. How galling to get everything 'right' and the egg to be elusive. arrggghhh!!!

FF if you don't get in touch soon, I'm coming round to see if you're ok.

BB how's the feeding going? Names? x

Italian so pleased the evening's coming soon and that you'll have more info. Keep us posted.

Love and waves to all

Gosh LOL nearly 36 weeks wow!!!! Nearly there xxx we re fine ta. Phebs is totally & utterly delightful. I love her so much , she's an absolute joy. Reminds me of Georgie & is a constant comfort.
Certainly press for a swab. Good luck xxxx
Hi all xxxx

Gum that's wonderful news that the line is still there and indeed a little darker so it looks like you're well and truly underway on the 9 month roller coaster! Many congratulations and welcome little Gumbean - there are lots of people cheering you on already x

A big thanks to everyone who posted their timelines for the return of the elusive period after an ERPC...It seems that 6 weeks was common for many and so I will try and remain patient but at 43, I'm with BlackCats....as if the loss wasn't bad enough the feeling of lost time too is such a strain.

Twirly In a way it's good that the tears have started to come, hopefully the healing can begin. It's been 5 and a half weeks since we were told about the 2nd twin losing it's heartbeat and the spontaneous crying has ebbed away. thinking of you.

Knicky Cycle 16 has a certian lucky ring to it!

Clicking How are you doing? All good and blooming I hope?

Hippy xxxx

LOL so close now, your story is so heartening to read and I hope you are not feeling too tired in the last few weeks. Exciting times!

Big wave to everyone else and nothing much to report from me other than feeling a little more back in the saddle with the thought of TTC and certainly inspired by all the tales of enhanced fertility post MC!

love from Lucy x

eeer love from Lucky...Lucy is my unlucky alter ego :o

OMG - LOL it really doesn't seem like 5 mins ago you were telling us you git a BFP. Neither of my successful pregnancies went that quick! It probably doesn't feel like its been quick for you. Wow other peoples pregnancies fo soooo quick. Defo get the swan done - I would. XXXXXXX

A combination of tiredness and being on my phone has rendered that last post a complete nonsense - hope you get the idea :)

Lol, they do the swab as a matter of routine in Oz,and I'm so glad they do - I had it with my last birth and it was easily fixed with antibiotics. They gave it to me when I went into labour.I worried about the antibiotics upsetting my LO's gut flora,but he was unscathed.Insist upon it if it helps you feel calm.

I can't believe you're already 36 weeks. Wow! I'm very excited for you and hope you'll give us all the lovely details about the birth and you LO once he is here.

Hippy - sending hugs your way.Sorry your body is being uncooperative. It's hard enough without eggs going AWOL!

Thanks Lucky, I am starting to believe that I'm actually pregnant,but kind of want to not think that so that the next few weeks don't feel like forever and have me feeling anxious. Last time was awful, I was so scared,and in the end miscarried. I can't say all the worrying helped at all, but it's so hard to switch off,and not get hopes up.

I think we need a list of things that will help get one through the first trimester.

Any suggestions? I'll start:

DON'T keep taking your temperature every morning.It will fluctuate and have you convinced it is all over when it is not.
DON'T keep peeing on sticks every morning and comparing the strength of the line. It will vary according to concentrations of hcg in your pee, and you'll be convinced...etc.
DON'T start shopping for anything remotely pregnancy and baby related.
DO attend regular acupuncture sessions to help you be calm and relaxed.

Can you add to it? I'm already feeling a bit jumpy, when I promised myself I wouldn't be, and that there's nothing I can do to change the outcome (except maybe doing hard drugs and drinking a bottle of gin...

gum, congratulations on your BFP. Excellent news, I hoping it stays put for you.

and belated congratulations to clicking as well, I think I just missed that one.

lol, thanks for the info about supplements. I'm just taking boots conception vits at the moment, but will look into the co enzyme Q10. I think I also read somewhere (on here probably) royal jelly may be useful, has anyone tried it? I think though blackcats point that it's mainly down to being lucky enough to catch that one good egg is worth remembering, and there's not a huge amount that you can do. I'm feeling quite positive at the moment as I'm on cd8 so it's still possible this month. And on the plus side, I've realised DH won't be away for SWI week, on the minus side his mum will be staying with us for babysitting purposes.

twirly hope you're doing as ok as you can be at the moment

hi to everyone else

gum all the signs seem good for you, really pleased that line seems darker it shows there's hope for all of us ttc, as others have said it's all about finding that 'good egg' little buggers seem very elusive though lol

lol I can't believe either you're 36 weeks already, wow time has flown bet you're ready to pop it out now though!

I'm starting to feel the unmistakeable signs of pmt coming on - either that or it's just Monday blues but I don't think i caught this month despite lots of swi-ing, my dh said I was really grumpy when I got up this morning - probably because he bashed hell out of the snooze button on the clock and broke the damned thing

hey to everyone else, and chin up Italian hippy twirly

Hi! Looking very good Gum . How is dh about it? Echo the 'stop taking your temps' rule - madness that way lies! Getting really excited for you xxx
Hippy Has your af actually started yet or are you still in limbo land re: possible no ovulation this month? Just what you need eh xxx
Angel Phoebs sounds adorable and you sound so happy. How are the solids going?
All fine here. Samuel had his kidney scan this morning and the dilation has 'resolved' so we should be signed off at the next consultant appointment. Very pleased! Was feeling quite anxious waiting in ultrasound (when do I not in that clinic!)
Lucky sounds like it won't be too long for you before ttc-ing again - you have everything to look forward to x
Tina I'd say your dh's snooze-button rage is an adequate reason for feelings of 'tension', without needing to blame pmt! Fingers crossed x
Love to all xxx

Diege fabulous news. So glad alls ok with the scan. Phebs eating like mad now!!! How's Samuel? All of a sudden over night decided she wanted to eat!!!
How's work?
I ve just managed to negoiate to do longer days & only work 4 a week... Will be lovely to have that extra day with Phebs.
Hi all xxxx

Hugs to all, best luck Lol - look out for that swan!