Fantastic 40+ thread - part 6

[Curlylox]

Over here everyone

Hello, I'm new... well, new here. I'd welcome some advice from some fellow (ahem) older people, and this might be the place! I am 45, DS is 22 months and I have a coil - we were incredibly lucky and conceived after 4 months (with a little help from CBFM). This last month it looks like I may have conceived despite coil, but it didn't stick and I am in a bit of turmoil.

We had pretty much decided to stick at one, for practical, PFB and financial reasons. Having what looked like a decision forced upon us has upset my complacent applecart... Even tho it hasn't turned out, I was DELIGHTED at the prospect and now need to decide what to do: coil out and have a bash for a few months? Stick to my lovely DS-centric world? Will he ever forgive me for de-throning him or never forgive me for not at least trying to give him a sibling... Don't know what I want to you say, really, I just wanted to vent and wonder and can't in RL because everyone will think I am MAD... Sorry to jump in on thread like this...

Hi Elena - sounds completely normal to me to be thinking all those things. I think you DS will love a new sibling, and feel displaced too. But later on, he'll have an ally, which will be very nice for him. I'm a bit biased as I have 5 kids and still hoping for just-one-more!

Hippy - lovely to hear from you. I'm not sure what to do about the DHEA.I have a large bottle there, but I've already taken it for 4 months (only the 2 weeks before O) and not sure if I should go again. Usually with IVF treatment they do it for four full months beforehand. Does that equate to 8 half months?Advice please...
I love that you are writing a book!Can't wait to read it.

Another BFN today at 11 DPO. Pretty sure it isn't to be.And next month, unless ovulation holds off a bit, my DH is away in the run up to O.He'll be home on day 14, so who knows, maybe I'll just squeeze in SWI on the day...

My 's are still very tender, but I put that down to getting on a bit and probably being peri-menopausal. It sucks, I just want to be fertile and have one more!

Tina all best wishes for the two week wait, we may end up as cycle buddies!

Elena I can't really advise you what to do, this route is pretty tough at times but you might get lucky. PERSONALLY I'd probably do a pros and cons list, throw it in the air, toss a coin, see how I feel about the coin toss and then follow my heart! But you probably also need to chat to DH and see what he thinks as well! I expect your son will be happy whatever happens because he has you. I know having a sibling for my daughter was a big part of wanting another child but after years of trying I do now feel at peace if this does not work out. All best wishes with whatever you decide to do.

Hugs to Hippy, Diege, Angelgeorgie, MiasAlexandrasmum, Lol, Marythersa, Blackcatdancing, Shandy, Fireflies* and co.

Hippy, hopefulgum and Tina Thanks for your concern, I am on iron tablets now and I am sure I will be fine. I feel a whole lot better now I am not on the beta blockers and my breathlessness and palpitations have pretty much stopped. I went for a walk today with a friend and I felt better than I have for ages. We are continuing. I feel fine. I am quite excited now!

Thanks for asking.

Hugs to all.

Good morning everyone - hope you've all got lovely hot sunny weather where you are too!

I was on here a few weeks ago asking for some advice on which tests I should be asking my GP for - the results are back (drum roll . . .) but I wondered whether there was a reliable website you could suggest which would help me work them out? Is there anywhere that I can find a list of age versus what is OK in terms of results?

Thanks very much!

The advice seems very confusing - re progesterone it seems to suggest that 15 and above means ovulation has happened, but it needs to really be 30 or more to be of any use, is that right?

Thanks, guys... got two weeks til coil removal appointment to change my mind/make up my mind/stop feeling like I'm losing my mind so we shall see!

Tina we are cycle buddies! Horary honey!

Elena67 All best wishes for your decision.

twirlyagogo sorry I can?t offer any advice, but all best wishes.

Hopefulgum Sorry about your BFN. Here?s hoping for better news soon.

Hugs to Hippy, Diege, Angelgeorgie, MiasAlexandrasmum, Lol, Marythersa, Blackcatdancing, Shandy, Fireflies* and co.

GREAT news, things are going well.

I got a call this morning to say that the 6-celled one (Jenever) had not made it at all and only 1 cell remained of the formerly 4-celled one (May). I was very shocked because I really thought the 6-celled one would make it. The 4-celled one was basically now too small, they like 50% of the cells to survive (and later it just stopped altogether). I was really sad and thought that was it but I just carried on with what I was doing and tried not to think of it. I was so excited when a while later I realised my phone ringer was not working and there were four missed calls to call the clinic! So I called and they said that the 8-celled one had survived intact. We went up the clinic and Serentis was put inside me with a relatively simple procedure. It is now a waiting game for just over two weeks.

Hugs and best wishes to all.

Italian how exciting - so thrilled for you!!! I so hope it sticks for you, lots of positive vibes sent your way. I've felt vile today really low and pmt-ish, exactly what happened last time and although i know it's a bit early yet I feel in my heart of hearts the IUI hasn't worked again, really nice to share the 2ww with you though

italian that's great news. I shall keep my fingers crossed for you, really hope it works out.

Oh Italian fx .... So excited for you xxxxx

italian that is brilliant news, I am SO glad for you. Go little Serentis, go!

gum so sorry.

News here - I am hoping we will complete on our house purchase tomorrow!

Thanks ladies, for your encouragement.

MiaAlexandrasmummy all best wishes for your house purchase.

Wow Italian that's brilliant news, so pleased for you. We are all with you on your 2ww
MiaAlexandrasmummy very best of luck wth your house - stressful but will be worth it when you are in!

Wow italian! Great news. Sending up prayers and keeping everything crossed for you. Take care. Ff xx

Fireflies and Diege thanks for your love and concern. All prayers very gratefully received.

I'll have pie and chips and tiramasu, please.

Hugs to all.

That's wonderful news,Italian. I hope the tww flies for you.

Tina - sorry that you feel the IUI didn't work.I hope you're wrong and get a lovely bright BFP in a couple of weeks.

RTD arrived yesterday.Not happy! Having been trying for so long,practially on my own(DH and I don't discuss it,he doesn't know I get sad every time I get AF,month after month), I'm beginning to feel despondent,and that I should stop being silly and get on with my life.

I know I can "get on with my life" while I ttc,and that's basically what I'm doing, but no matter what, it's still at the front of my mind.

And I'm bummed because my DH is going away again in a week's time for a week, which means he won't be back til day 15, so we might miss the ovulation window.I've been trying to think of ways to delay ovulation, but maybe it would be better to just let it go,and see what happens.

Can anyone advise me on taking DHEA? I've taken it for the last 4 months, but only in the first part of my cycle (til O day).I know with IVF protocols, it is taken for 4 full months til treatment. Should I stop now, or continue as I didn't take it the whole months? I'm not sure what to do.

I have a two hour yoga class today.Can't wait.It has been ages.I just wish AF wasn't coming with me.I hope she behaves!

Oh Gum so sorry about af - wat a horrible 'crash' after all the very positive symptoms The yoga class will be great, and the timing doesn't sound too bad foir next month (I conceived dc 4 2 days after ov - the only day the deed was done that month). Shame you can't fill a few syringes
Italian bistro order fulfilled. Sorry for bistro absence - a trolley service was provided at the last minute but only cold snack unfortuantely.
Fireflies how are things going?
Spent last night doing my teaching excellence award nomination - I sound truly pompous and very boring, but it does read well if I say so myself. Have already mentally spent the £1000 prize money (on academic texts, natch )
Love to all - it's sooo cold here!

Just popping in to wish Italian all the very very best for your 2ww, and for everyone mentalling away.

Sorry to hear about AF gum :(

I had my nuchal this week. Results came in as 1 in 731 for Downs, adjusted from 1 in 39 for my age (44). So I'm 13 weeks pregnant today, and for now all looks good. Can't quite believe it and not shouting from the rooftops that's for sure.

Waves to all x

jolls fab news - so very pleased for you.

Good luck Diege.

Hopefulgum hugs.

Tina hugs and hand-holding on 2ww!

Miaalexandersmummy, Angelgeorgie, lol, Hippy, Fireflies and co - BIG HUGS. Sorry to miss some out, just running out the door to Spring Harvest, back in a week.

KISSES and Baby dust.

Hi all -

Some exciting things happening on this thread! Good luck Italian!

Still looking for some info on test results if anyone is an expert or can point me to a reputable website that is objective on these things . . .

Jolls - that is FABULOUS news! So happy for you.

Twirly - I'll help if I can. Which tests? I've had the AMH test, the FSH test and Estrogen and testosterone. On my results it had my levels and also said what was considered normal for different stages of the cycle and if the levels were perimenopausal. However, these things can (and frequently do) change. My estrogen was quite low after my 2nd miscarriage, and I was told it would stop ovulation from happening, however I was ovulating and my progesterone showed I was. My FSH was over 10, which is the normal level, but it was 11, then 12, so I wasn't too bothered. My AMH was very low, which means I'm running out of eggs, but I seem to keep ovulating month after month. I do hope I still have some golden eggs in there!

I'm not sure about the progesterone. In my tests it just said if you have a level over 20 then you have ovulated. Nothing was mentioned about it not being high enough to support a pregnancy.One test I had said it was 35, and I was told that was "very good" to sustain a pregnancy.

My doctor said my testosterone was a little low and that DHEA would help.

I hope that helps.

Thank you so much gum - I don't seem to have all of those.

I had progesterone of 40, FSH of 3.5 and LH of 3.6. She said it was all fine and that the best advice she could give on those figures was that if I didn't want to get pregnant, to use contraception.

So, does my FSH need to be over 10? Maybe that one's the problem.

Thyroid was fine, but I'm anaemic, which is recurring anyway, but must be why I'm so absolutely exhausted.

GP said I definitely wasn't perimenopausal. She said she'd had 4 women my age or above in the last few months who had got pregnant naturally so it does happen but I think it's a tiny chance, isn't it? I think if the tests had come back saying I was perimenopausal, it would have been something I could have coped with (although it would be hard as it would at any stage), but now I'm just as confused as ever. I do feel that even if I did conceive, I'd miscarry though .

Hello, just a quicky from me. italian I so so so so so so want this little one to work out for you. Nothing more I can say, I wish you a calm and patient 2 WW - ha ha like that's gonna happen.

jolls you know how much I love Jollybean.

Lastly just wanted to say to Elena67 - it is really quite a hard decision whether you go for it or not with regard to another baby. I can share a little of my experience and hope it helps - if it doesn't then please feel free to disregard it

We decided quite late that we wanted another baby. I had been happy with my two for a few years, I even said on my wedding day (when the boys were 6 and 3) that i felt complete now. then suddenly as I approached 43 I had a conversation with Dh in which he asked if we had left it too late for another baby and BAM! I wanted to be pregnant again. We started trying when i was 43 and we were successful after 5 months but unfortunately we lost that one to a MMC, got pregnant again after 3 months and lost that one to a MC. It's now been close to 3 years since we started trying to increase our family by that precious one more and i haven't gotten a BFP for nearly 2 years. On the one hand I wish i could go back to the days before I made this decision, when i felt happy with my lot and wasn't always wishing, wishing for that elusive last baby. BUT, as awful as it was to go through two losses, i will always know that we did all we could to make that person happen. If I hadn't tried I know I would have nievely thought..."I would have gotten pregnant so easily if we'd just bothered to try" I would have thought this because I did get pregnant easily with both my boys (when i was 33 & 36) and i would have gone to my grave convinced that I could have EASILY done it again. And that would have been wrong. I am used to the BFN's now and I actually don't expect a BFP ever again. i will always feel sad for the ones we lost (in particular the first one because i was so close to 12 weeks when it went wrong and we'd already told our boys about it). But I don't regret trying. Sorry, that wasn't quick at all was it?

Just a little added bit for elana67 - I've re-read my comment and it seems very negative. just because i haven't been successful at getting a take home babe in arms - doesn't mean you wont be successful - many on this thread have been lucky, it seems to be a bit of luck and a lot of trying. Good luck whatever you decide.

Twirly - those results are brilliant! An FSH of 3.5 is really,really good.When I said 10 was normal, I mean that's about the highest they want it - lower is much better. They don't like to do IVF if you're over 10, and suggest donor eggs. So your results are really good and you should feel confident that everything is working.

Hippy- I understand what you are saying. As difficult as it is to have month after month of no luck, you do know you tried. I'm just like you are - I always fell pregnant easily, and wouldn't have believed having one last crack at it would be so hard.I really thought it'd be easy.Now I know better. And I'm sure,somehow,it has made me a better person (still haven't quite worked that one out!)